1131 – Carols with the Clomps

  • Notable Notes

    Notable Language:

    • Clomp-Based Questions (CBQs)
    • The Act of Activeness
    • For the Love of Flatley

    Notable Culture:

    • Kylie Minogue’s “Santa Baby”
    • Babes in Toyland
    • Michael Flatley

    Notable Talking Points:

    • Are there any traditional clomping dances?
    • Hard Shoe vs Soft Shoe
    • Creating a Joyous Release
  • For Transcript of Episode Click Here

    Episode 1131 – Carols with the Clomps

     

    [START OF RECORDING]

     

    SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, whether…this is the pod…this hopefully is a podcast where it feels like a…I don’t know what a soft shoe is when someone says I’m doing the soft shoe, or the soft chew. Either one. Keep your shoes and your chews quiet at bedtime. I’ll do my best, but this episode, oddly enough, is about louder shoes like tap shoes, clogs, or clomps, in this case. Wooden shoes on a wooden floor is not…some people might…but there is a percentage of people that say you know, I find that incredibly sleepy. But this is not the place for that. This is a place where I’ll just keep talking and not making very much sense. So, if that’s how it’s feeling to you, you might be in the right place. This is a podcast to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff.

     

    It’s called Sleep With Me. I don’t know if I said that already. Normally I forget a lot of those kinda details. This podcast does not work for everybody, but it works for almost no one on the first try. That’s just what regular listeners have said, because it is a bit strange. It’s a podcast that never goes anywhere, but it’s always running. But I’m here to help and to keep you company, so if you’ve ever struggled to stay asleep or fall asleep, you felt a little bit lonely in the deep, dark night, that’s what the show is here for, to keep you company — but you don’t need to listen to it — so you could fall asleep. The fact is, you deserve a good night’s sleep.

     

    I’m so glad you’re here. Structurally we’re gonna do some support for the show, then there will be a long, meandering intro with a little bit of info to ease you into bedtime, and then we’ll have a holiday bedtime story. Caroling with the Clomps I think is what it’s called. So, I’m glad you’re here. Give this show a few tries. I hope I can keep you company and take your mind off of stuff and ease you into bedtime. It’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. Thanks for making it possible, my patron peeps.

     

    INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’ll do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts you’re…you know, thoughts, things you’re thinking about on your mind, right? Thoughts about the past, the present, the future, thinking thoughts, thoughts about thoughts. It could be thoughts and feelings about thoughts, about feelings about thoughts and thoughts about feelings, and oh boy, do those two dance in my mind. Is there any traditional clomping dances?

     

    Not just with wooden shoes, but it does seem like my thoughts and my feelings, when they dance across my bed at night, they are doing some sort of clomping-type dance, a traditional clomp, a bedtime clomp. It doesn’t help you fall asleep, and I don’t have hardwood floors anywhere in…I mean, I have tile upstairs or whatever, but…which would be above my room. So, they may dance up there, and then they say hey, we brought out own…we bought our…brought our own super-echoey hardwood floor, a dance floor. It’s raised so it could be hollow. Helps with the clomping and actually amplifies and echoes the clomps. Also, here’s a movie pitch; it doesn’t make any…Christmas with the Clomps. It works. I mean, as a title. I have no idea what it would be about.

     

    It could be about…oh no, we don’t go caroling; we go clomping. Oh no, no, no, not at a…no, not at the normal caroling hours before…after 5:00 PM, before 9:30 PM. No, we clomp…we’re clomping after midnight. Oh, we’ve…no, we can’t clomp to the song After Midnight; that song is a little slow for us. Oh, what am I clomping on and on about? What if…I wonder if anyone ever said…if you…if there is some sort of…I’m sure there is some sort of clomp dancing. You say Scoots, I’m…you’re misusing the word ‘clomp’. I say okay, well, then this does…this makes even less sense than usual. But clomping is…was…oh, I was gonna say if there’s a clomp superfan, a person who clomps, just like somebody that plays…you’d say, what genre of hobby would you put clomping in with? I’d say other dancing…other…people that love to dance.

     

    I don’t know if clomping’s a traditional cultural dance, other than my…it’s a tradition my thoughts and my feelings have. So, traditional within my world. But I’d…I don’t know, I’d associate it with…I don’t know why…what’s that thing called? The accordion pops in my head. But I was saying, my thoughts and my feelings, they also are wearing shirts that say I Clomp, Therefore I Am. That was a very long-winded way of saying it. So, whatever’s keeping you awake; thoughts, feelings, clomping. I mean, believe me, if you live in an apartment, you’ve dealt with some sort of clomp-like activity if you have someone above you or below you or you’re in a hotel room. Can you imagine not…being at the…back in the day being Lionel Richie’s neighbor?

     

    I’m sure by the time that song was recorded, due to the success of the Commodores, Lionel Richie was not in an apartment, but maybe in a hotel. You’d say oh, what…yeah; oh, what a feeling when you’re…why you gotta be dancing on the…? I got the top floor so I wouldn’t have to deal with this. Now you’re dancing on your ceiling and my water looks like it’s if…the original Jurassic Park here, and that’s just the start of it. When did Lionel Richie get into clomping? I’d say I don’t know, but that’s…it gives legitimacy to my claims that ‘clomp’ is a real word and I’m using it correctly. He does a smooth clomp. It still makes a bunch of noises. Oh, what shoes would you wear?

     

    I think wooden shoes or any…you could use some sort of non-organic shoe, but it would be a hard…not a…they say it in the clomping biz; they say it’s a hard-soled shoe. But they say, not S-O-L-E, man. Oh boy, that’s a hard-souled shoe. They say that at the competitions, like when someone really is clomping up a storm. They say, no…that’s probably where that term came from; you’re blankety-blanking up a storm. It was at the first clomp-off. Well, I guess I know what this ep…I thought this episode was gonna be about one thing. Now I guess we gotta do some sort of…the great…Christmas with the Clomps. That’s what we’ll do. So, I guess that solves that one. But what else did…? So, okay, I got mixed up, though.

     

    Oh, so whatever’s keeping you awake, I’m here to take your mind off of it, believe it or not, and keep you company so you could fall asleep. So, whether it’s thoughts, feelings, physical sensations, noises, neighbors, travel, guests, you got something coming up, whatever it is that’s keeping you awake, I’m here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep. The reason I make the show is because first off…and the most important thing is you; you deserve a good night’s sleep. Whether this is your first episode or your thousandth episode, you deserve a good night’s sleep. You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread, that you could look forward to or feel neutral about, a bedtime where you say oh, okay, I feel like I could breathe here and I do feel like I could get comfortable, and I’ll see how it goes.

     

    If I can provide that for you and then I can take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep so you could get the rest you need and you deserve, if I could be a part of your bedtime routine or lead you to something else that becomes part of your bedtime routine, that’s important to me because if you get the rest you need, your life is gonna be more manageable and you could be out there living your life, and that means the world we live in is a better place, because you are important. It’s true. The other side is that I know how it feels not being able to get…trouble staying asleep; that’s where I’m at right now. So, whatever it is that’s keeping you awake, I know how it feels in the deep, dark night. I might not deal with the exact same thing, but me and hundreds of thousands of other people that are listening right now, they know how it feels.

     

    So, it’s not easy. So, that’s one thing, or two things. The other thing is the podcast is just not for everybody. So, if you already loathe me, sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou has a lot of other sleepy stuff on there. But give it a few tries. That’s what most listeners say. Give it a few tries, see how it goes. No one gets used to it the first time, and I’ll explain some of that coming up here. But the first thing I’ll do is send my voice across the deep, dark night, or I guess I already have. Then I kinda go on pointless meanders and superfluous tangents, which we’ve already…we went on a bunch with the clomping and repetitive thoughts. Oh boy, circular logic; when those…when…that’s a different…that’s a clomping dance. I say, please…and they say well, would you like to do our octagonal something?

     

    I say please, no geometry-based clomping. They say oh, okay, would you like us to do some chemistry…? I say no, no, not…I say, that’s more alliterative, but chemistry-based clomping is not…I’m trying to go to bed. I don’t know how my thoughts and my feelings got their own dance floor. That’s where it all…where did it all go wrong? Well, it wasn’t just that my thoughts and my feelings had their own dance floor. It was a very expensive and noisy dance floor that seems like it would be perfect for tap-dancing. Oh, we got it from the Gene Kelly estate; that’s how we got it. We got it on a…we got a great deal because it was Gene Kelly VIII, and they just found it in a storage unit onsite. Oh, great. That’s great…I’m so glad you got a bargain on that imaginary dance floor that’s keeping me up all night.

     

    Oh, we didn’t know we were keeping you up. We just thought we were waking you up intermittently. Currently, you are. I’ll tell you what; if I could get ahold of…I can’t do it now, but I’m gonna make up an entire episode about this, hopefully. So, can I get back to you? How about we get back to you tonight? Oh, great. Okay, so whatever’s keeping you awake…those are the things that keep me awake. I’m here to take your mind off of stuff and keep you company. Believe it or not, I’m not here to be listened to, but you can kinda listen. Or if you need to listen, you can listen. Listening is optional, so if you’re waiting for the show to get started or make sense, you’ll be…it’s more of a show you say uh-huh, uh-huh. Just, you know…I mean, you’ve been listening so far, so you know what you’re dealing with, kind of.

     

    You say okay, I don’t know if this guy deserves my full attention. I say, exactly. You know me better than…you’re kinda listening. Great work. Another way to view it is just to listen…just like the podcast, a little bit out of focus. So, it’s a podcast you don’t really listen to. It also does not put you to sleep. I’m here to keep you company, to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-cuz, your bore-bestie, your bore-bor, your neigh-bore, your bore-bruh, your friend, your bore-friend in the deep, dark night, to keep you company while you fall asleep, to talk and not be listened to. There’s no pressure to fall asleep. I’m gonna be here to the very end, so you don’t have to fall asleep. There’s listeners that can’t fall asleep, and I’m here to keep them company, too.

     

    I’m here to keep you company whether you’re listening or not, whether you’re awake or you’re asleep, if you need a break during the day. That’s why I’m here, to be your friend in the deep, dark night. So, those are two things. The other thing that can throw people off is the structure of the show. Show’s designed in a very specific way. You can adjust as you become a regular listener, but let me tell you the structure of the show. It starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, glad you’re here, so that you feel seen and welcome. Then the next goal is the podcast is free and paying for it’s optional, and it comes out twice a week on the regular. So, the way we do that is the sponsors that support the show and the listeners that support the show or the sponsors.

     

    So, that’s how we’re here free twice a week, so that part is there. Then there’s support for listeners and support for the communities around the show. So, that’s kinda one of the support sections. Then there’s the intro, and you could skip all that support section if you support the show, most places, but a lot of people like the support stuff. Then there’s the intro, which is separate from the support. Believe it or not, there’s a couple thousand people that listen to intro-only episodes exclusively. But for most people, the intro is part of their bedtime routine. It’s where I inefficiently introduce the podcast. A efficient introduction to the podcast would be welcome to Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. Let’s get to it.

     

    But that doesn’t really reflect how we fall asleep, for the most part, or just the kinda style of this show. So, for most of us, it takes some winding down to get some distance from being awake to asleep. I ease you into bedtime and the intro is a part of that, where I get to go off topic and talk about the clomping and my emotional and…I don’t know. I think I have some spiritual clomp in there. Oh, that was Michael Flatley VIII’s imaginary show, The Spirit of the Clomp. A lot of companies reached out to me. It’s not corporate synergy. They say, you know what? We need a write-off, so we need you to do a Michael Flatley show. I say okay, well, I have…I had Clomping on Ice; it didn’t work out. What about The Spirit of the Clomp? They said, great. So, saved them a bunch of money. I mean, great for them.

     

    They said well, unfortunately I took my payment in tickets, but that was my mistake. Anywhere, where was I? Oh, so…oh, structure of the show…oh, the intro goes on and on and on, so some listeners…2% of people skip it, but for most listeners, they’re getting ready for bed or they’re doing some sort of other relaxing activity or they’re in bed getting comfortable. So if you’re new, just see how it goes. There’s the intro, then there’s support between the intro and the story, again, so the podcast can be free. Then there will be our story. I guess it’ll be Christmas with the Clomps, or I think Caroling with the Clomps is what I’m feeling.

     

    Then there will be some thank-yous at the end. So, that’s the structure of the show, that’s why I make the show. I’m really glad you’re here. Give the show a few tries if you’re new. See how it goes. You got nothing to lose except for a little patience, but eventually you say oh, wait, I don’t need to be patient ‘cause I can just barely listen to you. But I’m glad you’re here. I appreciate your time. I really hope I can help you fall asleep. I yearn and I strive to do that, so thanks again for coming by, and here’s a couple ways I’m able to do this for you for free twice a week.

     

    Alright everybody, so this is a very special episode for the holiday season called Caroling with the Clomps, and the Clomps are…you may have heard in the intro, maybe you’re just tuning in now, maybe you’re just listening for a break or you got that holiday fever, but you’re looking. I’ve done deep dives before; I said well, let me find some alternative holiday music to listen to or a new take on holiday music, or a deep dive. Oh boy, do…but you…then if you’re here, you’ve dove so deep, and if you have a fandom for the Clomps…even though I explained it in the intro, I’ll kinda set it up again and then we’ll go to the story episode here. The Clomps are a famous clomping group, which you may have never heard of before.

     

    Clomping is a form of dance, though if you were viewing it, you’d say…at first, if you were a passer-by, particularly in this situation, ‘cause they’re caroling through clomping, but they’re not clomping out the songs; they’re clomping to the songs that they’re caroling — I guess technically — within their minds. So, I guess if you were a casual observer, they knock…at least if they knocked on your door…I don’t know if they’d take this much time to explain it, ‘cause you’d say I’m trying to get back to my holiday cheer, here. Could you just do your…I thought this was a one-song deal. But what happened was…I’ll explain what clomp…the Clomps and clomping are. Like a lot of us, you say when was the last time…and I’ll answer the question for everybody; when was the last time I encountered door-to-door carolers?

     

    Because it’s something that’s kind of passed into…I mean, I guess maybe some people live places where there’s caroling, door-to-door caroling, going on. I haven’t seen it, and I live not that far from Christmas Tree Lane. Now, the cool thing is…Christmas Tree Lane is, not to go off-topic again, but I have seen the high school bands there, though I never…I always forget what…to check what night that’s gonna be. At one point, they’re…and I think it was on Christmas Eve I went there, there was people playing bluegrass music at a house, bluegrass holiday tunes, and I’m sure there’s some sort of caroling going on, a whole lot…oh boy, that’s not a whole lot of caroling going on. That could be a song I could write, maybe. But that’s not the case right now. You said well, there’s not a whole lot of caroling going on.

     

    We could use…we could…we don’t just need a little more holiday; we need a little more caroling. That’s what the Clomps said to themselves. They were originally just clomping…I mean, they weren’t clomp…they originally clomped. Clomp is a form of dance; may or may not be imaginary and only exist within my mind, and the Clomps are a family, an extend…not…they’re not all related, but they…it’s…they call themselves the Clomps. Alls you have to do is have love…you know, I…alls you have…you don’t even have to fully believe I clomp, therefore I am. You might say I’m interested in clomping. Also, if you ever want clomp-based questions answered, listen to Clomp Notes. It’s things interesting to clomps, clompers, and people interested in clomping.

     

    It’s a podcast…also not…unfortunately you can only listen to it on an imaginary podcast player within me, which it doesn’t…so, this is really your only taste of it. But so, the Clomps said to themselves one day when they were just…probably before or after a formal clomp…I don’t know if they…I don’t know…I’m only…I’m a outsider, so I can only tell you…I don’t know if they call it rehearsal or practice. I mean, I can say let’s do another run-through of that. That’s probably been said at a clomp…clomp sessions, there’s clomp-offs. Much like knocking; that’s…and I say wow, there’s some overlay. No wonder I’m so interested in this clomping. Holy cow, I didn’t even realize…now that I’m doing this, I should ask them…’cause they have to knock on every door.

     

    That’s one of my niche pasttimes, is listening to recorded knocks of people knocking on doors. But this isn’t about me; it’s about the Clomps. One day, they…you know, if you’re already a clomper, you’re thinking outside the box. Oh, what’s…? Oh no, let me explain how they became…caroling, and then I’ll explain what clomping is. But so, they were sitting around chill…I don’t know if they were chilling, but let’s just imagine they were, and they said huh, what about caroling? Nobody carols anymore. Oh, I was gonna say, when was the last time that you saw someone caroling? Getting some good pointless meanders out of this. My memory of the last time I remember caroling, it was somewhere between…I have no idea. It was definitely in the…it could have been in the eighties or the nineties. That’s how long ago.

     

    It was at my grandma’s house, and I remember going to her door. She didn’t even have a front door; she had a side door, but which I guess technically was the front door. I remember people came to her house on Christmas Eve and were caroling. Only one time I remember it happening, and I just remember coming to the door and being like whoa, this is like a movie. There’s people caroling out there. I have no idea who it was or what they sang. That may have been my only wild encounter with door-to-door carolers that I’m aware of, though a lot of times in my past life, I was not clear of mind most…for the…some of the…no, yeah, some of the nineties, all of the aughts, and most of the…or part of the tens or whatever, on holiday evenings.

     

    So, I wouldn’t…there’s a chance I wouldn’t…I have…I had great experiences with carolers or not so great ones. But the Clomps were wondering the same thing; they said nobody carols anymore door-to-door. They said, what if we do some caroling with the Clomps? We go Clomp caroling. Then the…they…they’re…like a lot of other groups of positive people, they said okay, tell me more. What will we do? They said well, ‘cause we couldn’t clomp…we could clomp the music, but that would take…it might take some of the joy out of it because we wouldn’t be…it’d be such a formal dancing to make clomping sounds to songs, though I will tell you the finale is to do that with Deck the Halls. That’s why. I think maybe that’s what happened; they tried it with Deck the Halls and they said this took, whatever, fifty sessions.

     

    We missed one holiday season, so we can’t clomp out the songs in a…also, that’s not caroling; it’s clomping. Then they said well, we could play the songs and dance to it, but then we gotta bring them…then people might not like that. That’s not very…and they…then someone said what about the idea of attraction rather than promotion, or whatever? They said, what do you mean? They said, what if we just go door-to-door clomp…we have the carols in our minds, for the time being. We clomp and then maybe somebody gets…they say whoa boy, we should be caroling while you’re clomping, and then we start a thing. People are caroling, pro…carolers, and we’re clomping to the carols. That’s where we’d like to be. But we can’t go wrong if we’re trying to bring holiday joy door-to-door through dance.

     

    They always do something about Michael Flatley. I don’t know why, but they say oh boy, for the love of Flatley. Oh, what’s clomping, though? If you’re with me thus far, you may know what clomp…clomping is a form of dance. Now, people…the easiest association is with those wooden shoes or wooden clogs. I guess those are…this is not wooden clog dance, but you’d say is there a form of dance where people dance in wooden clogs? There may be. I think there is, though of course I could be basing it on my small, narrow window of my own knowledge and experience, which is mostly filled…most of the view is of my own ignorance because I’m…I say oh, the window’s not open; I’m just looking at my own reflection. So, I don’t know if there’s a traditional wooden clog dance. I think there is.

     

    Clomping is…that’s a easy way to describe it. It is…now, they don’t all…they don’t wear clogs. You can buy…they…but they clomp around. So, it’s different than tap dance and it’s different than clog dancing, if there is such a thing, or other dances, but it is similar because they’re dancing, but part of the dancing produces constant clomping sounds. So, it’s in the genre of noisy dancing as opposed to quiet dancing, like ballet…I don’t…jazz, maybe, any soft-shoe-based dancing. This is…I guess…I don’t know, does dance fall into those categories? This is a hard-shoe dance and a noisy dance versus a quiet dance or softer dance. This is almost as loud as it gets. It’s particularly apt…now, the Clomps don’t live in a snowy environment, these Clomps. But there’s other clompers out there.

     

    But it is particular…now, you would…if they were in a snowy environment, they would have to carry their shoes because I don’t think that clomping shoes have good traction. A lot of them are water-permeable, though I’m sure…’cause you could probably varnish up a pair of clomping shoes, but only after you hang them up. You know, to say okay, I’m hanging my clomping…I’m hanging my clomper…they call them clompers ‘cause these clompers are made for clomping. That’s what I do. I put on these clompers and I clomp in my clomping shoes. Yeah, they said what are you doing, just clomping around? No; I mean, I’m clomping, not just clomping around. So, that’s all to say that it’s not exclusively a wooden-based shoe, but technically, clomping is a form of dance in a shoe…a wooden shoe or shoe that sounds similar.

     

    So, a shoe that has some hollowness. Now, some clompers, yeah, they’re hollow shoes. They’re a wooden shoe that’s also hollow, and some clompers are not. But it’s dancing in a wooden or wooden-like shoe on a hard surface, ideally. Now…oh, that’s what I was gonna say, is a lot of asphalt or concrete is pretty good for clomping. Not ideal, like I talked about…the clompers in my mind at bedtime, they love a hollow dance…a raised, hollow dance floor or a…I don’t know, a stage. I guess you’d say well, this stage is specially designed for clomping. It’s a little bit stiffer and yeah, it’s hollow on the outside, but it…we reflect the noise into the audience through the bandshell or whatever, the orchestra pit. We’ve modified things.

     

    But you get enough people clomping…so this has got to be a good group, ‘cause an asphalt or a concrete is gonna…some part of my brain just said, who you calling an asphalt? I said, I don’t…I have no idea what you were talking about, but don’t make an asphalt out of us, please. That’s what another thing in my brain…please don’t. But so, alls that to say is this is a group of people that have a forlorn caroling situation and they love dancing in wooden shoes…I’m using as a…you know what I mean, to just help you focus, but not exclusively clogs. Though I would imagine, now that I’m thinking about it, a clog would be a good one just because you could…there’s different moves you could make, right? I’m just trying to imagine what I’d be clomping in. A clog would be good ‘cause you could kick out…you know what I mean?

     

    ‘Cause it doesn’t have…you could kick your heel down and do a move with the clog that you might not…my knowledge of wooden shoes is pretty limited, or hard-based, loud shoes. What are those ninja boots called? Those were…when I was a kid, that was one of the most…you knew…a single child or a child of means was somebody that had…they said well, I have ninja boots. They have a…I think they’re…they have a specific term and they would usually have other ninja items, but ninja boots…they would always say they’re the most comfortable thing; I wear them with my pajamas. Can’t wear them outside. I’d say, but aren’t they exactly designed for being outside in…I guess reality is their parents would be like, you’re not leaving the house in your ninja boots. First of all, they cost…you don’t even know how much ninja boots cost.

     

    Secondly, you can’t go to church in ninja boots. They said mom, they’re not called ninja boots. She says yeah, but Scooter has a limited vocabulary, so in this example I’ll be calling them ninja boots. Also, I would call them ninja boots. You would call them by the correct term if you were in a imagination of a person that had a wider range of vocabulary. But ninja boots would be the exact opposite, I guess. Well, I guess ballet shoes, prob…but ballet shoes can make some sounds. ‘Cause I mean, I don’t know, are ninja boot…anyone dance in ninja boots? I’m sure a happy ninja did at some point. But whatever, I don’t know what that has to do with anything. So, let’s go to the Clomps and listen in as they’ve…further along as they’ve…okay, everybody.

     

    So, this is the first song we were thinking of, and I was thinking we could do Kylie Minogue’s Santa Baby. Does anybody have an objection to doing Kylie Minogue’s Santa Baby as opposed to other Santa Babies? Okay, great, great. So, it’s like…I was thinking for that one, we would do…in order for people to understand it, until we have caroling, we would put…we would have our Santa hats in our back pockets, right? Then I think it could be fun to kind of also make it obvious what we’re singing…dancing about also be confusing, but kinda go in the opposite expectations. But also there’s a subversion there, because if the song was playing out, if…I don’t actually know all the lyrics to the song, so maybe I have the meaning of the song wrong, but what if you had Santa’s baby as a result of singing Santa…I don’t know, just an idea.

     

    But I was thinking we’d pull…put our Santa hats on and then we could do some gentle rocking as we clomp side-to-side. Then maybe even play it on…like that Rockabye Baby kinda thing, on a treetop. But I was just thinking some sort of soothing thing. Under the tree; there’s something like that. Oh, how did I get a…? I don’t know why I got put…placed in charge of the idea-pitching, but I’m…I have a next idea, and it’s Winter Wonderland. That one is so easy, right? So, I see all your hands going up. That’s great. We could…I think that we walk hand-in-hand. I was thinking for the meadow, we could do tiptoe…short steps, that we’re crossing a meadow on our tiptoes.

     

    Then when we kind of do a wider squat when we’re doing the snowman…also so we’re…our lower bodies are looking like a snow person, but also like we’re doing something, you know, to describe our…and then the rest of it I think would just play out easy. But that’s my idea for that one. Next up would be Santa Claus is Coming to Town. I think a lot of heel action. I was thinking…that made me think of that…there’s this sleep podcaster I listen to who took piano lessons but he never practiced piano except going to his lessons, and he would make his teacher cry a lot because he never practiced. It was kind of like a strange dance they were all involved in and he never…unfortunately he didn’t learn to assert himself or to practice. He just learned to numb himself to his teacher’s tears.

     

    But he also…one of the few songs he learned to play was…over and over again, even after years of piano lessons, was Up on the Housetop, Click, Click, Click. So, maybe we do that one? Then we go into…so, we do Santa Claus is Coming to Town into Up on the Housetop. I know it’s not a popular song except in…but I don’t know, I was just thinking of it because I said, that’s one of the only songs you learn to play on…Chopsticks and that. Yeah. But so, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, I was thinking a lot of outward leg movement and marching, like we’re coming into town. Maybe…what if that one…and we could do that same for March of the Wooden Soldiers, Babes in Toyland. We could alternate houses. What if that’s the first number we do?

     

    So, for houses with a narrow walkway, whoever’s going to the door will say okay, we’re here to do some clomping…caroling via clomp. Oh, what is that? Well, we’re gonna dance in these wooden shoes for you to holiday songs. We don’t have any carolers with us, but you’ll be able to figure the songs out. It’ll be fun, like a little game. That’s a pretty good way to explain it. Then for the first one…and then hopefully there’s kids there or people that have some joy in their hearts that we could ignite a little bit, or they’ll just close the door and then we’ll keep going. But that you march…you could be waiting on the sidewalk and then march in.

     

    I guess the difference between the wooden soldiers and Santa Claus is that as you’re marching, maybe do some sort of Rockette move with the hats, where they’re flowing onto the heads as you’re coming down the lane. But that would be Santa Claus is Coming to Town. Trying to think of any other things we need to know for that one. The next one I was thinking is Have a Holly Jolly Christmas. That one, pretty easy…in case you didn’t hear, and…with year, we could do…one person could do the calendar. Oh, by…so, a lot of jolly…like, I was thinking we all pretend…maybe we could…here’s an idea; I’m taking this to the next level in a method way so we know what we’re doing, because I can see the blank looks on some of your faces.

     

    So this one, let’s pretend we are…let’s pretend it’s the 1980s, okay, and we are mall-based Santas. We’re at our training, okay? So, the person standing at the board saying…so, in some sense, if it was a musical and we were rewriting the meaning of the song…like, the meaning of the song would be, your job is to provide the residents of this mall a holly, jolly Christmas. So, the person standing at the board…need a holly, jolly Christmas this year…we need you trained for this year…they’re standing at the board, so then when we’re doing the line, we’re practicing different things. So, bowl full of jelly, laughing, saying…now, they don’t necessarily need to know this, right? We’re just providing…but that’s how we get into the modus of providing a holly, jolly Christmas.

     

    So, that would be…that’s that idea for that one. Next up, It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas. Okay, I think this method thing…this one…let’s pretend that calendars and dates don’t exist, but there’s something called calendar scouts or holiday scouts. So, for every holiday of the year, no one knows it’s coming. Something…some…this could be part of a broader story where a spell has been cast, people don’t know the dates, they have an inability to retain that information about holidays only, ‘cause otherwise the world would be total chaos, maybe, or people would ask too many questions. But so, this spell has been cast, and maybe the rest of our…maybe our dance could be that; maybe we could connect the snow people somehow. Yeah, that would be another act or part of Act 1? I don’t know.

     

    But this would be the…so, this would be the first thing, maybe, or the second thing. So, Beginning to Look a Lot like Christmas…so, in this storyline, we as dancers are the holiday scouts for the holiday season. I think in this sense, we do use our dance to go broader than Christmas, so we’re…each of us…everyone can choose a holiday…a December holiday or seasonal…winter or seasonal holiday, yeah. Let’s make it winter seasonal holiday. Each of us is scouting for that, so your job is to find…it’s beginning to look a lot like blank, and your dance represents that. This is an essential job for the Planet Earth, where people…a planet where people celebrate it and large portions of the economy depend on this. So, this isn’t just a job you take lightly, and you may not be human. You may be some sort of demi-god.

     

    Maybe in this world, yeah, there’s…we’re called…the holiday scout stripes…sprites, and we’re…we go…we let people know…we’re the only ones that have the ability…’cause it’s very subtle. ‘Cause even the changing of the seasons could be subtle, you know? If you don’t have a calendar, you say what the heck? It’s snowing. Oh, okay. Oh yeah, it’s…well, okay. Well, oh, the snow melted. Gotta go on to my next thing. So, in this one, you’re really…you’re…it’s an important job to look…you’re the scout for your holiday, and again, we can…I know some of you want different ones, so we could work it out. But your dance represents each discovery that’s leading you…and yeah, no, no, I like that idea. Yeah, you discover the boxes of decorations and then that reminds…okay, yeah.

     

    Okay, you discover that book of recipes. Okay, I like that. Okay, yeah, you discover, yeah, something that’s secular. That’s totally cool. You say okay, yeah. Yeah, and…oh, or…oh, pictures…okay. Then you use those to then go out and say…it just isn’t seasonal. In some sense you’d think…‘cause it could even be people that say well, what about that holiday creep? But what if our minds were not erased? So you say well, huh. They got holiday stuff on sale. Don’t know what that means. Your job would say, you know what it means, is the holidays are coming up now that they’re selling holiday things. People would be like, you’re kidding me. I didn’t even realize.

     

    Thank goodness there’s a…someone out there letting us know this and…knowing and keeping an eye out to say it’s beginning to look a lot like…okay, so what…I think going with this, maybe the next song…and again, we broaden it because we’re…we don’t have the carolers. So we’re just dancing, so we do have per…we do have artistic license here through our clomping to have your…so, then we go from It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like…and again, we’re also kind of repurposing the meaning of Have Yourself A Merry Little however you celebrate the holiday season. But that’s more of when…so, huh, maybe there is…do we need proxy? Are the…is the family at the door the proxy or do we also…? Okay, you’re volunteering; you’re saying if we need proxies, you will be the proxies.

     

    Oh, some people have…oh, you…what’s that mean? Okay, so I’m saying if this was…if this wasn’t happening at someone’s front door, if they were going to a show, maybe we’d need a family to represent…for the audience to project themselves onto, and/or also to make it easier to explain what’s happening…is we’re going from saying hey, the reason those…oh, maybe you discovered those decor…oh, maybe the weather’s changing. All these things are slowly adding up to a mystery which is it’s beginning to look a lot like, and now you’re saying have yourself a merry little…so then you’re going from the anticipation to the preparation, or the awareness to the preparation. Then again, I guess that Holly Jolly one we could go into. Oh, so, what would that look like? Well, this would be tough.

     

    I think this is a tough one because we would be presenting or prepping, but not giving any gifts or anything like that. It wouldn’t be the actual holiday. It would be here…so, maybe in checklist-type dance where we’re checking off things? We’d have to make sure that that’s…we have some diff…but then we could lead into that Holly Jolly one. But I don’t know, ‘cause I don’t want it to be…oh, good question; how many hours are we gonna be at each person’s house? I don’t know. Now that we’re getting the story down, I think it could be endless. It could be hours. But yeah, okay, and then…so, that’s the…so, we go from awareness to active preparation to active activeness.

     

    So, the active activeness would be actually decorating, and the joy of moving into the next active phase of holiday preparations, so decoration would be symbolically representative even though it doesn’t represent everything people are doing. Okay, so you’d want cooking. Should we do…should we see if we have any other songs to do that as a separate activity? Because yeah, most ways of celebrating or most things you would be celebrating do have some sort of foods associated with it, and meal…and again, I guess if we did a cooking one, we could do a separate mealtime one. But this would be…so again, okay, I’m saying yes to all those ideas. This would be a…working on the accoutrements, okay?

     

    Yeah, and that would be Jingle Bell Rock, and I think that’d be fun ‘cause we could do bells and different rock…and I mean, nothing rocking, but…and dancing while we’re doing it. So, showing the prepare…that there is a certain process of joy in the participation. Yeah, so I think that’s a good one. Then next one would be…again, we would change it, but it would be…I love Darlene Love, so…I mean, I know there’s other versions of the song, but Baby, Please Come Home, where that…and I think that would follow nicely after the accoutrements, would be a wistful, forlorn dance for those people we’re waiting for that could join us or may not join us. I mean, I think that could be a fun one, right?

     

    To jump back, I just had this idea…another song, and again, we could…these…some of these could be pulled, depending on when the family cuts contact, if they close their door or they decide they want the full show, would be Let It Snow. I think may…do we do that at…towards the end or somewhere at this point, where we’re on…where we’re the…I guess we were changing characters, huh? I didn’t even realize that we’re becoming…we went from being the seasonal scout sprites to now something different, which is fine. So, this is more like a dance-recital-type, even though it’s not different dance squads recitaling, where each song were kind of a different dance squad. But I was thinking Let It Snow is always a good one, you know? So, I don’t know, we do Let It Snow earlier or we could do it later.

     

    Then another one I think…it’ll be tough; It’s the Most Wonderful Time of Year. I think that would reel in from…so, I think in this story, right now what’s happening is the person has started preparation, then they’ve realized oh, this person might not make it. A bit like a coffee commercial where you say, are you coming home and drinking coffee…is another…so, the person at the end of that song is feeling down, and then another set of dancers is offering them the reminder that it’s the most wonderful time of year. I think it’s the best time of year, too. Maybe we do both those songs. So, they are trying to re…so, that…in that, the joy of the process of preparation and anticipation has been lost in the eye of uncertainty, and because…but they’re looking at the destination and this person is reminding…oh no, no, no, this is a sixty-day marathon or whatever, and you’re…for all of these…or we’re celebrating every single holiday within this.

     

    But they’re saying no, this is a process. You forget that it’s really a process that you enjoy and not the result. So, that’s what It’s A Wonderful…they’re saying…so, I guess it goes back…maybe they’re showing…and maybe they’re just walking you back through the present process and going into the kitchen, I think. I think going into the kitchen, and then we go to simply having a Wonderful Christmastime. That goes into the food preparation one, where…’cause that’s a…great ideas that people have had, but that…and again, they offer so much for everybody’s…the holiday that is in your heart that you’re dancing for and expressing, and also it just say…okay, and that’s a great song to dance to, I think.

     

    We could do a lot of spinning, a lot of trays, a lot of hand work, and again, a lot of movement ‘cause you’re going from the oven or the stove to the table to the cupboard to the chopping board to the mixing. We do Holly…oh yeah, we did Holly Jolly. Okay. I don’t know, another song I like is Feliz Navidad, but I just thought of how we…the last two songs; we finish it, so we still need…I don’t know, I just like Feliz Navidad. I think that’s a fun song to dance to and to sing along, but I don’t know. You’re right, if it fits within the story…but I was just thinking maybe we’re missing…or maybe we’re not…is we…I mean, we have to do the two songs that no…because now, if we’re…depending on when we’re caroling, but they won't hear the songs. We have to do the Mariah Carey and Wham!. So, is there one eating song?

     

    Or we just stretch out simply having a Wonderful Christmastime, and we leave it open. You’re right, you’re right. But then we do have to have the emotional thing and then the surprise, so maybe we have one dancer that hasn’t appeared at all and we go…we do a medley; Last Christmas, All I Want for Christmas is You, to hearken back, and we can do the picture frame…people dancing with the picture frame. I guess that could be part of the me…the back-half of the meal, or someone…the table’s celebrating but there’s one person off, looking at a picture frame. Then they’re dancing for the…for, again, then we have a proxy. That would be fun; people could practice their sitting…stage sitting or whatever you want to call it. So, by the end of that one, they’re saying okay, but yeah, this is still what I want.

     

    Even again, because it’s not…doesn’t have to be related to one specific holiday or necessarily getting what they want. I mean, I was thinking that it’s the person training to be a Santa who has been gone, and now they’re coming back. In some sense they were maybe even working as Santa and they’re saying…but I think the last return…maybe then we do Feliz…okay, you’re right, you’re right, you’re right. Then we do Feliz Navidad last. Again, as that one, we could actually clomp out the song. So, we start with Deck the Halls and then end with Feliz Navidad. Again, what’s in your heart, we…again, we can change it ‘cause we’re just clomping. There’s no lyrics. So, again, we have artistic inter…reinter…we can be as creative as we want.

     

    But okay, so during that medley, the person comes in, but again, I think in my heart, it would not be the person they were waiting for, but another reminder of the love and the process and that some things defy expectations and sometimes…you know, the full thing. But there could also be kids that were wishing for a present. You know, again, you could be dancing or at the table playing out your own thing and then some of you could be playing it as the audience representatives. But this last person comes in and then we go in…then the joy…that’s a symbolic thing, that they say oh, okay, whatever it is for you, but their arrival signals Feliz…the start of Feliz Navidad and a joyous release. We skip over oh, what happens…the process is…we don’t worry about that. Then that’s New Year’s Eve or whatever. Let them worry about it.

     

    But we’re leaving them on a high note, but we get them to a high note by having a little bit of a low note. Then they’re carrying it back into their home, ideally, with…after we do Feliz Navidad. We clomp that out. Again, I guess for costumes, we need Santa hats, then again, maybe sweat…maybe…yeah, I…you know, I’ve always been resistant to these ugly sweaters, but if you’re picking a sweater that’s thematically…a ugly sweater that’s thematically lined with what’s in your heart to celebrate, or again, what you prefer to celebrate and what the meaning of the season is for you…only one bahug…only…if there’s a bahumbug, how can…you can’t clomp…oh, you’re gonna pull it off. Okay, so you’ll have a bahumbug one over…so you’ll have two sweaters.

     

    You could get warm, but again, yeah, I guess we’ll have to layer anyway depending on the weather. But yeah, that each person’s sweater rep…yeah, so then your sweater’s also…and that helps, because again, it’s like, some people may need it spelled out because they say what are you doing? Just clomping around. Now, I don’t know…I’m wondering how many people are gonna have the…we can rehearse, but I think a lot of this, again, we’re just going on the fly, and maybe we’re even condensing it. Is there a way to condense all that into…? I think we could do it pretty quickly, right? So, and then instead of being at someone’s…each house for three hours through this whole cycle, we’re running through that lineup.

     

    What do you think is an…how much is…what is does a non-clomp fan…their tolerance for clomping? If they know the first song and the second…last song, and then there’s just a lot of clomping in the middle…until we, again, attract carolers and then we can extend it. I mean, if we had carolers, it would make it a lot easier, but we don’t have carolers at this time. We just have us and our willingness to try. But I think we have something here. It’s like, caroling with the Clomps is gonna work. Again, it doesn’t have to be one specific thing. Again, I think if we can…if we do have to explain it…they say okay, do you have a extra forty-five minutes? We can explain what we just did. They say well, our dinner’s getting cold. They’d say okay, well, we…maybe we could work that into that scene. That’s great notes. Thank you.

     

    They say no, no, our dinner’s actually…oh, you weren’t…okay, well…okay, those weren’t notes. But I was saying…I forgot what I was saying…is if we just help them carry it into their homes…I don’t know what else…I got mixed up, but I had another idea. But it’s just about communicating this whole thing. Yeah, because then maybe next year…oh, I guess if we explain it, then they say next year you could pretend you have no memory of dates and you’re on the…you’re scouting for your holiday season. But again, the reminder that…take some joy in the process.

     

    Not just the anticipate…it’s not just about anticipation or nostalgia; it’s about participation, maybe less so than anticipation. Maybe I’ll get that on my sweater, or maybe I’ll just write it on the side of my shoes. But I’m excited. This is gonna be great. We’ll be clomping around, clomping and caroling all the way into people’s hearts. Yeah, it looks like everybody’s resting now. That’s a good idea. We’ll get some rest, we’ll get some sleep, and then we’ll get to work caroling and clomping away. Goodnight, everybody.

     

    [END OF RECORDING]

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