1230 – Bread Week | Great British Bake You Off to Sleep S10/C7 Ep3
A soft pillow loaf of lulls will be the proof your pillow needs to carry you off to dreamland.
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Episode 1230 – Bread Week | Great British Bake You Off to Sleep S10/C7 Ep3
[START OF RECORDING]
SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster that’s here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff, to be your friend in the deep, dark night, a podcaster that forgets what he’s talking…mispronounces what he forgets what he’s talking about, what he doesn’t know…but I know…here’s the things I do know, seriously; I’m here to help keep you company in the deep, dark night because I know how it feels…with trouble sleeping. I might not know exactly what you’re going through, but I think probably one of the many, many people listening can relate to it if I can't, or at least how it feels, and you deserve a good night's sleep. You deserve a bedtime where you can get some rest. So, I really hope I can help with this…with that.
This show is a little bit different, so it does take a couple tries to get used to and it doesn’t work for everybody, but I hope it works for you. Give it a few tries. See how it goes. That’s just what most people say. It’s here to be a friend in the deep, dark night to keep you company, kinda like a boring bedtime story but in the sense of like…hey…you call someone; you say, hey, just talk to me for a while and keep me company. I’m not gonna listen to you. That’s the essence of the show, a friend in the deep, dark night. So, I’m so glad you’re here. I really appreciate it. I’ll just give you the structure coming up. We’ve got some sponsors; that’s what enables us to put the show out twice a week for over an hour for free, so that’s just what makes it possible.
Then there’s support for listeners and stuff around the…communities around the show, then there’s a long, meandering intro which is separate from the support. The long, meandering intro is meant to introduce you to the podcast but also ease you into bedtime as you get ready for bed and you start to wind down. Then there’s some more support tucked in there, and then we’ll cover a episode of the Great British Bake Off, Bread Week, I believe. But you don’t need to have watched the show. It is so soothing, people baking bread. I guess it’s a competition, but it doesn’t feel competitive. It’s actually not; people are kinda competing just to do their best. They’re competing against bread in general, and so many different kinds of bread I had no idea about. So, really enjoyable stuff. Perfect for a sleep podcast. So, I’m glad you’re here. I really appreciate…oh, this is the very beginning of the show, huh? So, yeah, thanks for coming by and thanks for making is possible, my patron peeps.
INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’ll do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where we…you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts, it could be things you’re thinking about about the past, the present, the future…I think I was try…well, I’ll talk about it in a minute. But I sent out a e-mail and I had the right first letter of the person’s first name, but I did not have the rest of the letters correct. I keep thinking about it, so I’ll probably be thinking about it at bedtime, too.
So, it could be thoughts, it could be feelings related to those thoughts, 'cause I got some feelings about it. It was like…autocorrect happens, man. But it could be feelings related to the thoughts or feelings that are just there, it could be physical sensations, changes in time, temperature, routine, it could be something you have coming up or you’re going through or you’re getting over, whatever it is. The reason I list all that stuff is 'cause I want you to know you’re not alone even though this is this weird digital thing. I want you to know that you’re not alone in the deep, dark night, and I’m here to keep you company, and that I can relate to whatever it is you’re going through.
I might not know exactly what you’re dealing with, but as I said earlier, there’s probably someone listening who’s been through something similar and really understands how it feels. So, I really want you to know that, that the whole part of the show is that I understand generally that it’s not pleasant, not…trouble getting to sleep, trouble staying asleep, or getting up. But the other part of it…that I always say multiples times a episode now because it is so important is you deserve a good night's sleep. You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread, that you could look forward to, or at least feel neutral about. That’s true. You do deserve that, and I hope I can provide it for you, but if I can't, you could check out…like, if you already loathe me or the show, check out sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou and see…yeah, just check that out.
So, that has a list of other sleep podcasts and sleepy stuff on there. But you really do deserve the rest you need so your life is more manageable and that you could be out there flourishing if you’re getting the rest you need. That makes your world a better place. That means our world’s a better place. So, that’s really why I’m here and that I hope the show can help you. If you’re skeptical or doubtful, that totally makes sense. Like, why wouldn’t you be, right? You’ve probably tried a ton of stuff to put you to sleep. You’re probably frustrated, and maybe you were searching for this podcast or maybe somebody told you about it, and this show is very different. But that’s how most people get here; you’re frustrated, you’re fed up.
Now you got somebody rambling and not making any sense and there’s…this isn’t a traditionally soothing show. But do give it a few tries and see how it goes, 'cause I hope I can help you…or that you say, okay, now I’ll find something else that’ll…try out some other sleep podcasts. What I do is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I’m gonna use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents, all to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff so that you could fall asleep. Pointless meanders and superfluous tangents, I guess that’s when I started thinking of something and then I go…then I say, whatever’s…oh, mis-writing this person’s name. Also, they were having strong feelings about the podcast that they were letting me know about.
So, maybe it was also that nervousness. But then I’m thinking…I’m over…this is a pointless meander but I said, oh, they’re gonna be…they’re gonna think it was on purpose. But it was really…I was also thinking about an uncle who had the same name. It’s also when people have strong feelings about the podcast and they let me know about it, it’s like…I guess I wish I could say…is I’m doing the best I can, man. But I didn’t say that. I just said, hey, let me try to address these specific things you said. But I’ve found that most of the strong e-mails I get, it’s not…no minds will be changed, but that’s still instinctually what I wish, you know?
But maybe just saying that, yeah, I’m just doing the best I can here…thanks for the feedback…'cause it used to be…a long time ago I would be like, oh, okay…I’d try to explain…hey, this is how I feel or this…I understand you don’t like this or this, and this is why I do it, and also I put a ton…I try to explain my side and then it just…I end up making it more about me, which is not hard to when you say, hey…but anyway, that’s a pointless meander. That’s definitely pointless, but pointed for me. But this one, I really botched it 'cause I was trying to go that middle way and say, hey, thanks for letting me know. Let me look into it, but I think you could also try this. But really, the reality was…oh, maybe you just wanted to express your frustration with me, which really…that doesn’t even make sense.
You say, oh, thanks for expressing your frustration to me. I’m glad you reached out. There’s not much I can do about it. I’m just doing the best I can. If that lands for you…I don't think I should try it, though. I mean, what if I say, thanks for your feedback — I’m just doing the best I can here, have a great day. Would that…? That would be baffling, like most stuff with this podcast. But the fact that I put their name in wrong…and you know, the other thing…the lesson I learned is…I was trying to do it and then I said, well, maybe I should do this later. But I was trying to get back to the person, right? ‘Cause they wrote it when they were in the deep, dark night. Then I said, maybe I’ll review it and then…but usually if…since I wasn’t trying to explain anything, I said, just send it out.
But then I didn’t…I checked it but I didn’t check the name. Oh, what does this have to do with a sleep podcast? Just so you know, I can relate to overthinking, having strong feelings, physical sensations related to those strong feelings, and that I’m a human being and it’s like…sometimes when you’re doing the best you can, there’s a part of you that’s like, oh boy, not gonna cut it, right? Those are my brainbots. Oh, boy. Usually they appear at bedtime. So, those are the reasons I make the show. The way the podcast works…it’s kind of different in the sense that this is a podcast you don’t really listen to but you could listen to it.
All that means is that this is…it’s kind of like…some people listen to the show like it’s background noise at a low volume or a mumble, some people listen under their pillow, some people listen with sleep phones or headphones, some people listen across the room, some people pay attention and some people are just kinda listening, but it’s kinda like out-of-focus listening. If you’re waiting for me to get into some specific method that’s gonna put you to sleep and be sleepy, this is a podcast that never gets there. I’m mostly here to just talk to you and keep you company. So, you kinda just barely listen. Nothing…you say, uh-huh. Oh, you got feelings, huh? This is a great practice; if you want to rewind it…and I think this a perfectly legitimate way to use my feelings around the podcast; get meta here.
You could rewind it and say, uh-huh, oh yeah, you’re doing the best you can, Scoots. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Great. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. Got a person’s name wrong, huh? Mm-hm. Uh-huh. Okay, yeah, yeah. That’s the kinda…in a normal conversation, they’d be like, don’t you understand how I feel? You’d be expected in person to say, oh yeah, I…but this one you say, uh-huh…uh-huh, yep, you feel. Uh-huh. Yes, you feel. Uh-huh. I feel…yep. Fields of feels, yes. So, that’s what I mean when I…kinda just barely listen. Also, this podcast does not put you to sleep. I keep you company while you fall asleep. There’s no pressure to fall asleep. There’s a reason the show is over an hour long, and that’s because there’s no pressure to fall asleep. You don’t have to…you say, oh, it’s only twenty minutes or it’s only thirty minutes.
No, there’s plenty of time. There’s plenty of other free episodes in the archives. So, just kinda barely listen, and no pressure to fall asleep. There’s people who are listening who can't sleep or who need a break during the day. So, I’m here whether you’re awake or asleep, whether you’re listening to me or not. I’m here to keep you company and keep talking in this generally, mildly-soothing way, because my job is to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your neigh-bore, your bore-bor, your friend, your bore-friend. So, those are not…what else? Oh, structure of the show definitely throws people off. It’s kind of topical tonight. So, the structure of the show serves a few different purposes and…but it’s flexible as you become a regular listener.
So, the show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and then…the purpose of that is so that you feel seen and welcomed in and that you could check it out and say, huh, okay, I might check this podcast out. So, that’s the greeting or the teaser, we call it, when we’re working on the show. Then there’s support for the show can be free…and all the hard work that goes into this show so it can come out twice a week and be over an hour. So, that’s…and kinda the support does need to be heard. It is kind of…you can't sell a advertisement to somebody and make it so that nobody hears it or whatever.
So, it’s kind of a conundrum with a sleep podcast, but I’ve found…the way we designed the show, which I’ll explain in a second…yeah, then it can be free instead of just being a subscriber service or only being ten episodes or whatever. There’s over 550 free episodes of Sleep With Me you can pick and choose from that work for you that are over an hour. So, the sponsors enable us to do that. Then there’s an intro which is separate from the support which is long and meandering, lasts around ten to twenty minutes, where I introduce the podcast unsuccessfully but successfully in a sense, but I’m going on and on and on so that for the regular listener…and if you’re new, you say, okay, I’m getting a general idea of what the show is.
But for the regular listener, it’s a part of…it can be part of your bedtime whether you’re getting ready for bed, you’re doing some sort of chill wind-down activity, you’re in bed getting comfortable, or you’re drifting off. That’s what the intro is for, is to ease you into bedtime, not so much to put you to sleep, but…'cause most of the stuff I’ve learned over the years of making this show is that for most of us, it does take some wind-down time to be able to consistently get a good night's sleep. So, hopefully the intro, for most listeners, is a part of that wind-down and ease you into bedtime. There is 2% of listeners that skip the intro and start the show at twenty, twenty-five, or thirty minutes, and then there’s people that pay for the podcast either 'cause they want it ad-free or they just like to listen to the stories or they just like to listen to the intros, ironically enough.
So, those are options. As you become a regular listener, you can kind of adapt how you listen to the show. But for most people, the intro is like a slow wind-down, a landing strip into bedtime. Then there’s support after the intro so the show can be free twice a week, over an hour, then we’ll cover Great British Bake Off and we’ll just talk about the show and sweaters and dough and a lot of…holy cow, there’s a lot of prove…talk about timing the proving drawer in this episode. I don't think I’ve ever been in a house with a proving drawer. I remember when I was a bus boy, we had two…I think there was two drawers where we warmed the dinner rolls, 'cause that was part of our duty as bus boys, was…and that’s the ancient term. Even then, it was…I guess it’s kind of…bus-person, busser. I guess a busser is the proper term.
But they had…there was two drawers with rolls in them — or maybe only one — to keep the rolls…the dinner rolls warm, and one of our duties was to bring the dinner rolls to the table and…warm, you know. I don't know if that’s a proving drawer. I guess they would probably be a little shallow for a prove…it was a bread-warming drawer. That seems like something that people would be like, what…no, no, no, cut back on that. Warm bread? But it was nice, I bet. I never ate dinner at that restaurant, but I had a hamburger there once. We also got free sandwiches when we were working as a part of our shift, which was nice.
They were really good sandwiches, too. Okay, so…holy bread…holy…oh, so, we’ll talk about…I just thought, holy bread drawer. So, we’ll talk about Great British Bake Off, then there’s some thank-yous at the end. So, that’s kinda it. That’s the structure of the show. That’s why I make the show. I’m really glad you’re here. I really appreciate your time and you coming by, and I really hope I can help you fall asleep. Thanks again for coming by. I really yearn and I strive, like I said, and here’s a couple ways we’re able to do it for you for free twice a week.
Alright everybody, Scoots here. We’re talking about Bread Week — make great bread for bed — Season…or Collection 7, Episode 3. It starts with Noel, who’s on the phone with someone. He’s wearing a shirt…I want to say that’s a red with kinda gold ribbon print, but then also…what is that? A cheetah print over the flap of the chest pockets. Yeah. What do you call that? A pocket flap…and the wrists. Noel’s saying, yeah, I bring something unique to the show and I tell jokes and I wear one-off fashion shirts. But then Sandi has the same…he’s talking to his mum, too, by the way. Sandi shows up. She’s wearing the same shirt as him and so is…Prue is wearing a lighter version of it in kind of a rose, and then Paul opens his jacket; he’s wearing a green version. Paul’s pretty pleased with himself.
So, it was somewhat of a surprise, I think. He says, that’s my thing, man. What’s up with that? What do we got? Yeah, same shirts, then we go for the Bread Week sequence, the preview sequence. Bread’s getting chunked, people are not…people are under…they’re saying, oh boy, this…my temperature’s rising but this bread is not. Overthinking it, doing bread cuts or something, chewing their fingernails, pacing, and that’s just the teaser for the episode. Then we have the opening, and after the opening we have walking in…talking heads…bread…painting, Munch…what’s your favorite food? Helena loves bread but doesn’t make it often. Michael’s…has bread dread. Amelia makes a great bread pun; I’m here to prove myself. Henry’s only been learning it over the past four days.
So, then the judges and Noel and Sandi come out. Sandi’s got a nice sweater on with…like a heart-breaker sweater. Tiny crouton…something written on a tiny crouton…Paul’s a big bread man. Then they have to make a filled tear-and-share loaf. It could be sweet or savory. No pressure. Flavors and fillings are up to you. Three hours. Ready, set, bake. Yeast…oh, it’s gotta be yeasted, too. Phil says, bread, bread, bread. People are talking about breathing, breathing deeply. Tear-and-share is not as simple as you think, Paul says. Prue says, it’s gotta be big, yeasted dough and filled with something delicious. Paul says, keep it simple. Good flavors, good base, and they’ll do well. But if it gets more complicated, it could be a problem.
Henry’s working with charcoal. He doesn’t want to get it on his jumper or his clothes. Then he’s making a cake for his dad, Simon. Humungous homemade cakes; there’s some alliteration. He also likes wielding another set of blades in a local park, roller blades. Chicken and pesto tear-and-share; checkerboard brioche bread, sesame seed, black olives…and his parents said it was alright. He says, yeah, my mom’s a harsh critic. Paul says, I can relate. Nice to meet you, mate. Henry laughs that he got a handshake, but it wasn’t related to his food. Packing powerful flavors into the first prove…seaweed from Pembershire…cheese night in Welsh; nosincaws. Cheese goes well with that…that’s Michelle, a highly accomplished baker…Welsh cheese and Welsh rugby, especially when their son’s playing. So, cheesy tastes of home.
Tear-and-share, pancetta pear, black garlic, walnut truffle, and fruit compote…so, going…doing a Welsh theme. Sandi says, are you Welsh? Hardy-har-har. Michael’s a little further afield. Flavors in the south of India, Kerala…and it’s kind of an invented recipe. Michael also is a fitness instructor as a day job in Warwickshire. Helps him burn off those bread calories, it says. Red-and-white Keralan star bread. Chili, coconut chutney…Prue says, can you go easy on the chili, please? They’re all laughing. The judges are getting more chili. Chili and Manchego cheese tear-and-share; that’s Rosie. So, Spanish. We see Rosie’s pets, since she’s a vet, and that she uses equipment from work in her bakes. Spicy red chilies, Mediterranean vegetables, balsamic reduction, red onions, garlic.
They say, you’re…it’s a brioche dough, so it looks wetter than normal. She says, don't worry, it’ll be light and buttery. I tried it with other doughs; it wasn’t as nice. Paul says, interesting. Oh boy, we’re watching…now we got a kneading sequence. We’re watching everybody knead, baking bread. I’m still learning everyone’s names. Michael asks Noel to juggle his dough, and he says, yeah, I can. You have to juggle if you’re a comedian. He laughs. Everybody laughs. Ten minutes to knead it for. Focaccia; that’s Phil. My family heritage from Italy. Grazie, grazie. Phil eventually…his family settled in Essex where he’s lived all his life with his two daughters and his wife, Angela. Focaccia tear-and-share; garlic, herbs, parsley, rosemary.
He says, I’m a sweet guy. I do like a bit of cake. He goes, but I could…guess savory stuff, too. Now we gotta prove…the proving section, things going in proving drawers to ferment. They explain how that works. It’s gotta double in size, hopefully. If it goes too much, though, it’ll collapse. Now we got Amelia, Steph, Henry all working. Pesto corner, Henry says, between him and Steph. Steph is pounding the treadmill in trainers but also working one of three part-time jobs selling trainers. Those are sneakers in the US. Star-shaped Parmesan, sun-dried-tomato star tear-and-share…she says, this is gonna taste better than shop-bought pesto. Then we move to a Neapolitan classic.
A little bit different, though; Priya…pepper, onion…almost pizza-ish. Priya loves pizza. Leicestershire…extended family get-togethers that she bakes for…we see one of them. Smoke…this sounds delicious; smoky jalapeno tear-and-share with smoked paprika, cheese…but Prue says, how much jalapeno? She says, well, I made it for my dad but he eats a lot, so I’ve cut it down. As I’ve moved away from my parents, I’ve put less spice in food. Then Amelia's doing spice; harissa paste, chorizo, onions, peppers, and garlic…frying it up. It’s got a kick but it’s tasty. We see Yorkshire lass Amelia…loves to source local produce for her bakes. Her brunch tear-and-share is laden with punchy flavors. Noel says, you worried about Bread Week? She goes, yeah. He says, yeah, Paul’s thing is bread. Have you seen his chest?
His torso is like a baguette. He goes, sometimes I think of him as bread. How much time we got left? Halfway through. We see everybody really working hard. Juggle-proving versus baking time…but if you don’t get it right, your bread will be too small. Everybody’s talking to themselves, trying to stay positive. Phil’s looks the right size. So, the bread’s coming out of proving now. Doubled in size for Helena…roll it in a rectangle, fill it and roll it. Michael’s patting some stuff on here so his dough’s not soggy. He doesn’t want to be under-proved, undercooked, over-kneaded, wet, bad…Paul’s staring at him. Henry’s got his chicken stuffing. Rosie’s doing the cheese, Manchego cheese, caramelized peppers and onions…Phil’s folding his pancetta into his, and Michelle's putting walnuts and pancetta on hers.
Steph’s is a little bit of a pizza, but it’s parm…not…it’s Parmesan something. Priya’s sealing up her tear-and-share. Baklava flavor; that is Alice. She goes…she talks about how she’s a geography teacher from Essex, but her parents are dentists so she doesn’t eat much sweets. Teenage rebellion sweet tooth; Paul and Prue approve. Honey, orange blossom, spices, and nuts…Prue says, well…but that can be so sweet. Maybe with the bread dough, will that tune it down? Alice says, well, I do have a sweet tooth. David’s making cinnamon rolls. He loves them. So do I. He’s doing it simple. He goes, but then it has to be perfect. We also see him making inedible items he has to bake. He’s got a potter…he’s a potter.
Twisted bread rosettes, vanilla buttercream, brandy-soaked fruit…Paul’s never heard of buttercream on a cinnamon roll. He laughs. But I would say, go for it, man. I like it. Helena is also doing a cinnamon roll. She’s doing traditional American style. She goes, I love them for breakfast. I make them at night and then wake up, put them in the microwave…delicious. She lived in Las Vegas; that’s when she liked American bakes. Now she lives in Leeds with dog Kato, husband Will, daughter Flora. Cinnamon and pecan tear-and-share; toasted pecans, cream cheese…very gooey. Prue says, am I gonna need a fork and maybe even a bib? It will be messy. Alice is trying to keep hers tight because it’s baklava. Helena’s cutting hers. Loads of cinnamon…David's working on his. This is kind of like the sequence one. Everybody’s shaping their things.
I never made a tear…I don't make much stuff like this. This is too much. Got stuff getting folded together, put together…putting in to get cooked. We do have a little hint that…Amelia says, mine are gonna be different sizes. So impressed Steph has three different jobs. Everything goes back into the proving drawer again after it’s shaped for its second rise. Then we see the outside of the tent. Noel’s pretending he has bread legs or…with boots, real boots. Henry says, my proving drawer is like a sauna. So, yeast is working. Five minutes, ten minutes…I don't know. Timing’s critical, Sandi says. Steph’s chewing…maybe not chewing her nails, but she’s showing her…Alice is trying to talk herself down. I totally know what I’m doing. Everybody’s…so, while they’re waiting, there’s tense…intensity.
Helena pulls hers out, then Amelia, then Phil, and people start taking theirs out. Okay, well, no one…at this point, everything’s looking pretty good. Rosie’s is already…oh, Rosie’s looks baked but it isn’t, now it’s out of the proving drawer. Noel’s voice broke at the end. Everybody laughs at that, when he says something…I’m so emotional. So, everybody starts their baking process. 170 degrees…thirty minutes, thirty minutes. A lot of thirty minutes. Then they say, okay, now we gotta chill. Some people lay down in front of their oven. Some people sit. So, it’s a little bit of a sequence where it’s watching…should I watch it? Should I not watch it? Yeah, Michael says, I’m gonna lie down or sit here and watch. Maybe I’d take a snoozy-snooze. Oh, Helena says, maybe I’ll have a nap, a siesta.
Not stare at it or what? Phil’s watching. Come on, balls, cook nicely. We get a outside of the tent shot, watching everybody…and everybody’s trying to be entertained or entertain themselves, stay calm. Oh, Amelia does not like cheese, so she can smell somebody’s cheese. Then Noel has a bread hat on, very…the same thing he tried to use earlier. They had…in boots he’s wearing on his head now. Helena’s like, maybe I…cook mine better so they’re not undercooked for Paul. So, that’s another little teaser. Rosie’s a little worried. Michelle’s aren’t ready. Okay…Henry’s like, how long? Five minutes. So, everybody starts getting theirs out. David’s like, I think mine are done. Amelia’s out. Henry’s…Phil…Michael’s…Michael’s looks very fancy. So does Priya's. Rosie’s like, mine looks a little pale. Steph’s looks good. Phil’s looks good.
Alice looks good. Most of them look good. Henry’s is more like buns, but it looks good. Rosie’s trying to flip hers. Amelia’s flipping hers. Amelia’s like, okay, the bottom…Amelia and Rosie are like, the bottoms look good. Oh, maybe not; Rosie makes a face. Then they start icing. Noel says, Paul’s like a ballet dancer when he’s doing…baking; light on his feet. A little distracting, like Fred Astaire. Everybody’s trying to cool theirs with fanning, then decorating, putting…fancying it up, as they say. Oh, David's buttercream, man…David, you could put buttercream on my cinnamon roll. I mean, for sure I’d try…I’d love to try it. Then I’ll have one…I’ll have every flavor of cinnamon roll. Breakfast things like that, coffee cakes, cinnamon rolls, that’s my thing, man, one of them.
Okay, Phil’s…everybody…so, they get…they’re done. Time’s up. Then we have everybody sitting at their stations. Tear-and-share…Henry’s first. The judgement of Paul and Prue…and they…Henry…they go to Henry’s face. Okay, black and white works. Dramatic and nice. They cut it up. You can taste the pesto, but hard to taste anything else, Prue says. Paul says, it’s a bit bland. I don't like it. I don't know how you managed to do that. Paul likes Steph’s; color’s lovely but it’s bone dry. He said, if you would have been a few minutes earlier, you would have been laughing. Pesto’s good, but it’s over-baked. Rosie…Prue thinks it’s heaven. I like the soft…like the flavor. Could eat a lot of it. Flavor’s fantastic. Thank you, thank you. Alice…quite attractive, Paul says, but dry, over-baked slightly. I like the flavor. It’s delicious.
Then Amelia…they say, they’re irregular in size. One’s massive; this one’s minute. A bit thrown together. Let’s see…hearty with the chorizo. Prue…it’s so spicy, she coughs. Amelia says, that wasn’t my intention. She says, it’s delicious. It’s got a kick to it. Paul says, you should have chopped everything up smaller. There’s too much going on. Big on flavor. Then we go to David’s. Paul says, interesting texture, or Prue says that. Too doughy, Prue says. Yeah, but cinnamon sugar’s good. Dried fruit needs to be more…bake’s perfect. Then Helena; they say, there’s no tear-and-share 'cause it’s totally frosted. They say, well, you get messy. ‘Cause it is more like a cake, so actually, they do have her on a technicality. But it’s like an American cinnamon roll, but over-baked. She says, yeah, I was afraid it would be under-baked.
They both laugh. Then we go to Michelle’s Noson Caws. A bit messy. Rustic, cheesy…I like the texture. Then she…there’s black garlic and…well, that one’s nice, too. Truffle oil…baked well. Nice ideas. Then they go to Phil. His was like a focaccia tree. Like homemade bread like you’d want to eat, Prue says. Mm. Flavors are beautiful. Nice flavors. Nice loaf, that. Then Priya…Priya also has two dipping sauces. Very cheesy. Loads of flavor and texture. Beautifully baked. Over-proved, though. Otherwise tastes lovely. Well done. Michael’s just looks so fancy. It’s like…the colors. Very clever. Very pretty. Nice bake. Looks tasty, too. Prue starts to eat. I like the coconut; the coconut works well. The kick from the chili is good. I love the red circle. He gets a handshake. He’s stunned. Everybody claps. Everybody’s happy for him.
He goes, I liked it. I’ll tell you why; I never had anything like it. It’s special. Michael says, I got the first handshake. My mom’s gonna cry. Can’t wait to tell her and all my friends. So, he’s got…he’s very happy. Phil’s like, okay, Paul, how do you like my bread? That’s good; I am a baker. Michelle’s not looking forward to it and neither is Michael. They’re both stressed. Okay, so, we go to the…from the…shrouded in gingham. Next challenge is a mystery. In a twist, it’s Paul, the bread…the king of bread or whatever picked it. The bread king, Paul himself. So, they say, you two leave. Any words of wisdom? Not as easy as you think, Paul says. Off you go. Competitive dog grooming…so, they say, move along. Technical…eight white burger baps. What is a burger bap? It’s four veggie burgers inside four floury baps.
Two and a half hours. On your marks, get set, bake. Everybody says, oh dear. So, a lot of people are saying, oh, I never made baps before. A bap is like a…floury bap. I guess it’s like a bun. Michael says, if I can't make it, I’ll just buy them from now on. Then Prue and Paul talk. This isn’t easy 'cause you have to develop the gluten, 'cause if you don’t, it’ll be cake-like. It’s a lot of kneading. You gotta prove it for a long time; thirty minutes to forty. Burgers are only…90% of it’s for the roll because this is Bread Week and not Burger Week. Instructions…number one; make a bap or some…make the dough; yeast, salt, flour, water, then vegetarian lard. Henry’s never made it before. Noel says, you’re more of a…he goes, you’re not really a bap kind of character, are you? He says, no. What do you think I am?
Whole-wheat pita bread, or wholemeal. Then he says, Priya’s a crumpet or something? I don't know. He says, well, let’s take…no, he says, Prue’s a crumpet. Then he says, please take that out. He goes, this is too weird. Then step two; knead the dough. So, we get to see everybody kneading the dough, different techniques, trying to get it to the right…then prove the dough. So, proving it for a half-hour, alright, then they have to make the veggie burgers. Most people have never made them. Priya has, though. Black beans rough…into a rough mash. You don’t want it to be lumpy. People are making different-size ones. Should they be big like fast food or small? Right in the middle? Then they put them in the freezer. Noel does Morse code on a bowl on Sandi’s head. She goes, this is pleasurable.
So, that becomes a comedy thing where they cut back to them and they’re doing a game where they’re tapping bowls, glass bowls, on each other’s heads, or Pyrex bowls. Genuinely Sandi is laughing, so I liked that. Then they gotta shape it into buns. They’re doing maths to try to figure out the weight of each bun. Amelia had leftover dough…seven grams of dough per bun. Should I put seven grams back in? I don't want them to be too small, but that’s less than 10%…only less than 10%. Then you gotta flatten them. Quite a pert bun. Then you gotta prove them again; ten to twenty minutes. Priya can't find her proving bag. Noel goes through her purse or a purse, a yellow purse, takes some lipstick and says, I’m gonna sell it. Hour-and-ten left, so everybody’s trying to balance their proving. Half-hour left.
Baps to prove…people are starting to check. Some have gone up more than others. Have they changed? Then you gotta flour…dust with flour and bake them. Go in the oven…Henry says, please do good things. Twelve minutes bake? Eight minutes bake? I don't know. Let’s see, how do you tell if they’re done? If they’re a lighter color. Then they fry the burgers. Cook until browned…but their burger…if they’re a cooked-burger color already…then everybody’s checking their thing…hey, when will I know when these are done? What will they think…is this the right-size bun? They come out…everybody’s like, whoa, boy. Some people’s are a different size than their burgers, but at this point there’s five minutes left. So, assembly begins. We’re building them. Cutting the rolls…they really make good burgers.
All their burgers are very…with the lettuce and the tomato. Then Amelia's like, I knew it. I was wrong. I shouldn’t have said sod it at 10%. They start putting them together. They look really good. Different things…then the time is up. So, there’s four empty baps and then four baps with veggie burgers. This is the one where they don’t know whose is whose. Let’s see if I know…I can get the names right. Steph is first. They’re all the same. Could have been wider…some height. Chewy. Mm, bun good. Burgers; nice blend. Quite like it. Helena; quick look…breaking down…not a great mix. Nice flavor. Burger’s nice. Number three, Rosie; burger’s too big for the buns. Irregular. Nice flavor, though. Not very tasty, the burger. Phil; the buns are too dark. Tight inside. Crumbly burger.
Then Alice; under-proved and burger’s too big for the buns. David; nice, nice size. Open…nice roll. Quick taste…nice. Not bad burger. Very nice. Amelia; massively under-proved. Quite doughy. I really like Amelia, so it’s hard to…burger’s the wrong size. A lot of chili in there. Then Michelle; too chewy. Well-flavored burger. Nice color. David; small…or Michael, sorry. Then Priya; rolled up well. Two-third structure’s not bad…like the burger. Henry; I like the look. Massive, though. Right shape, and this is what you’re looking for. Nice roll. Bun fits over burger; hooray. All around nice. So, then they rank them. Amelia, Phil, Rosie, Helena, Alice…is that right?
Yeah, Phil…too small, overcooked…then they go to Rosie next…ninth, Helena; eight, Alice; seventh, Michael; sixth, Michelle; fifth, Priya; fourth, Steph; third, and…maybe needed to change the size…then David…a bit tight, but good. In first place is Henry. Very good burger bun. I think this was his first time even making them. So, then they do talking heads. Henry’s happy. Amelia’s like, I can't believe I made that 10% mistake. I have to do well now. Gotta do something tomorrow. Tons of burgers…then we see the outside twice, then we see walk…towards the tent, into the tent…jackets on, jackets off, bibs on…okay, Star Baker…there’s a group at the bottom; Amelia, Rosie, Alice. It’s gonna come down to showstopper.
Two people going home? Maybe, maybe not. Okay, then they go back. We see Henry’s breathing. Welcome back. Time for the showstopper. Create a display of artistically-scored loaves, themed…it could be woodland flora, oak leaves, acorns, a squirrel. Whatever it is, it must…two impressively-sized loaves. It’s really about the scoring decoration. Best thing since what? We don’t know. On your…five hours, I think? On your mark, get set, bake. Michael’s not confident. Stress will be evenly spread over five hours. Five hours sounds like a lot, but you gotta create a bunch of loaves, knead them, prove them, and of course, scoring the bread…Amelia says, I don't score bread. Paul says, yeah, it’s tricky. Or Prue says that.
You gotta cut it so when it rises in the oven, you want it to open up…to look decorative but not just open up. Tricky, tricky, skillful stuff. Just two large loaves is not gonna be enough 'cause you gotta make multiple breads. So, the dough won't take long, but you can't keep everything…so, you have to stagger everything, Amelia says, you know. So, you’re proving and some in the oven…timing. All or nothing, David says. Go big or go home. So, David’s doing a trio of African masks in different colors. Deep sourdough flavor…he’s like, I researched how to do it quickly; more yeast, which can create tears. So, not really conducive, Paul says, to doing something delicate like this. Henry’s gonna…is doing a fougasse, some kind of quick bread. Distinctive decorative holes…also some hardy rye breads. A lot of rye breads.
I love rye bread. Fougasse…corn-ear patterns…lightly score it. Paul says, but that’s not a lot of heavy scoring. Then Alice is kneading…get your guns pumping, Phil says, like a workout. Then Noel hits one of Michael’s…pieces of dough they juggled earlier, and…so, then we have…the first round of dough is getting shaped and proved. That should take an hour. Number one…then everybody goes right back to work. Alice’s is gonna taste like stuffing, hers…global bread…beetroot, walnut, Union Jack, poppy seeds, coriander, rye, garlic, and rosemary. That sounds delish. She says she loves geography and Noel says, I never met anybody that loved geography. Priya’s also doing a tropical theme; a flamingo, palm trees, tropical leaves, a hummingbird.
That’s the plan, a tropical ensemble. Italian seasoning, beetroot, bird bouillues or whatever you say, bouillues…but no fake colors. Maybe I’ll paint them, though. Priya’s doing also…Steph’s also doing a muted color combo, a high…hand-tied bouquet. Beetroot, rosemary loaf, whole-meat, lily, turmeric, bread stick stems…simple in the approach. It’s about the scoring, Paul says. David has a banana as a snack. Everybody’s kinda talking, working…we go to Rosie’s Exotic Bread Safari; elephant, giraffe, lion…sundried-tomato lion. She goes, that’s my thing, animals. Fauna from a savanna, turmeric, coriander, beetroot, chili…she says, I’ve never been on a real safari but I went on a local safari park. Michael’s also celebrating Mediterrania…Mediterrania? Mediterranium…Italy, a Mediterranean campfire.
So, smoked garlic, Parmesan, black onion seeds, charcoal powder. Noel says, how’s that handshake? Should we recreate it? You still got adrenaline from it? Noel’s making jokes about Paul. Michael’s not the only one working on something. Helena…commitment to all…continued commitment to all things spooky. Every day is Halloween. Every bake is Halloween. This is Halloween. So, lava stone rolls, pumpkin bread, pumpkin-shaped stuff, cauldron…she also has laryngitis, so then Noel does a Geordie accent and a Scottish accent, talking about baps. Everything’s…so, then the first prove's coming out. Everybody’s like, okay, it’s looking good…trying to shape it, shape their doughs. Phil’s doing a winner’s wreath, a victory wreath; applewood-smoked cheese, parsley, sage, and thyme.
I gotta score it. Gotta taste good, look good. Hoping to tick both boxes. Michelle is baking a whole bunch of breads; two loaves, a tree, a flower, a hedgehog, a snail, a butterfly, some ladybirds, and some bumble buds, all in our garden. So, yeah, it’s all raw, quite dense, chewy and doughy, but I love it. I hope Paul likes it. Amelia is also doing garden life on a micro level. Caterpillar…she’s got drawings of its shape, a butterfly in a cocoon. Caterpillar transformation…matcha powder, beetroot powder, garlic bread sticks. She says, I don't know the science of bread, but you really don’t know what’s going on ‘til it’s baked. Now it’s time to start scoring their first loaves, I think, before they go in the oven. People are talking about their nerves.
Don’t overthink it. Priya’s got different drawings set out, too. So, Priya starts, then Alice. People…everybody’s hands are shaking. Henry’s hands…you don’t want to go too deep or too shallow. Some people have dusted their doughs. So, this is a…I guess if you’re a freehand drawer…Rosie’s giraffe is like…wow, it really…talk about…then Priya’s doing designs. David’s designs look good. Alice is doing a Earth shape, or, you know…leaves for Michelle…so, everybody’s digging in, working hard, scoring. Henry’s questioning his move. Do me proud, little peacock. So, this will be about thirty-five minutes. Now they’re talking about the time pressure of balancing all these different times. Everybody’s trying to figure out what to do next, what to do in what order. Some people have bread sticks.
People are watching their oven, making sure of their color, checking the scoring and the definition, maybe too deeply. One of David and Michael’s have opened up a lot. David’s has split a lot. Noel has a tiny egg and a giant egg, one for him, one for Sandi. Two hours left. The second prove ends. Nice and stretchy…next bout of scoring. Amelia can't find her scorer. Oh, I found it. Sandi says, I better not stick around here. Okay, so then the next round of scoring is going on. More scoring stress…people are like, at least…'cause you could have scored and it’ll deflate, so that wouldn’t be good. The dough goes in the…yeah, you gotta get that dough in the oven in minutes. Earlier batches come out; they look good. Okay, does that look like the world?
It doesn’t look too bad. Okay, well, I’m happy with it. Pumpkins are green, so…then one of Henry’s is stuck to his sheet. David’s masks are split, but they look really cool. Like, if you ordered it and got it…if it wasn’t a competition, he probably would win, 'cause they are very artistic. Amelia’s not sure if her bread’s cooked all the way. The last things go in the oven, the final batches. Helena’s doing one of hers in a cast-iron pot. Great humidity, crispy crunch…crunchy crust. So, about a half-hour…Henry’s trying to de-paper his breads. Some people are painting; Michael, Priya, Michelle. Henry’s like, okay, well, we got most of the paper off, but Paul’s not gonna like it. Back at the waiting game, watching the oven…Steph’s…Steph does a yoga squat, which I’m trying to do more of myself. Fifteen minutes left.
Stuff comes out of the oven…summer…is this overdone? Is this done right? But everybody’s trying to get moving. Sandi says, yours looks cool, but I guess it’s not…and then same thing with one of Michael’s. Is that intentional, like a rip in time? Five minutes…everybody starts doing their artistic assembly. Phil’s just gotta stand it up like a trophy. So, everybody’s kinda…yeah, bakers, that’s the end of your showstopper. Some people are like, well, well…yeah, David’s very worried. Amelia’s not sure if hers are cooked. Out of my hands, though. Then we see the night sky or evening sky. Judgement time. Rosie has to go first. Bread Safari; that sounds…there’s a place called Toy Safari where I live. Scoring is very good. Fantastic effect. Elephant, giraffe…I like how you’ve scored them in a different way, each one, the lion.
Dense lines, thinner lines…clever. They have a gray bread. They say, I’ve never had a gray loaf before, but could do with more salt. Don’t be afraid to add more flavor, but delicious. Very artistic. Perfect scoring. Well done. Then Alice…and let’s see, nice definition. Nice-looking loaf. Clever. Recognizable globe. Paul smells it. Very nice nuts and seeds. Lovely flavor. They’re taking a bite…but could use more seasoning. A bit bland. Cuts are good. Nice-looking loaf. Not too bad. Well done. Okay, so, she brings hers back, then we have David’s. His look cool; it’s just they didn’t turn out how he wanted them. Sort of broken, but brilliant. Almost artistic renderings of stuff, but that wasn’t the challenge. The challenge was really good scoring. Then they go into one of his breads. Paul shakes his head. Barely done.
Idea was sound enough, but disappointed. Not enough salt, either. All style, no substance. David says, ugh. Then Helena; Every Bread is Halloween. So, they say, okay, this is very imaginative and wonderful. Fantastic, but you lost some definition in your cuts because you baked them in a pot, huh? Yeah. Could have been in there a little longer, maybe. Test out the bread…dense old loaf. Quite heavy. Only flavor is where it’s caramelized, and these cuts aren’t good enough. More emphasis on the cuts. Henry’s up. They’re checking things out. There’s paper on here, so that’s not good. This is…tough, and I’ve seen more decorative ones. Not really conducive to heavy scoring. Then they cut his loaf and…needs more time in the oven, man. More proving, more time in the oven, but nice flavor. Flavor’s good.
Cuts are a bit ripped, though. It’s a shame. Then Steph’s up. She gives a big smile. Highly effective, hasn’t blown anywhere…could have left it in longer. She goes, yeah, I was scared of that, but after yesterday, I was over-baked. They start eating it. Rosemary flavoring is good. Well-baked. Well-proved. Structure’s beautiful. Love the cuts. Love the design. Excellent, Steph. Thank you. Then we have Priya up. Hers has got a lot of painting on it, so it looks very beautiful. You could see the cuts, but we want more definition and less painting. More scoring; less painting. They cut in. Good…great structure, actually. Take a bite…could have been more potent with the flavors. Cuts deeper…two nice loaves, though, nevertheless. Phil; they got his Winner’s Wreath. Ingenious scoring on the laurel leaves. The edge is beautiful.
Beautifully baked. They start…they say, wow, this thing’s light, too. Baked well. You got some scoring going on, but not a huge amount. Bread’s delicious. So, thank you. Then Michelle…and, let’s see…they say, effective. Some of your scoring is really neat and beautiful. I like the color on the larger ones, but you lost some definition. Then they start cutting into stuff. Paul takes a bite. I like the flavor. I would have liked it crustier. Okay, I like it the same…the hedgehog is rye. Stodgy, quite dense…rye is always gonna be, but they taste delicious. Thank you. Then Amelia…and…clumsy, your scoring. No finesse. Man, that’s harsh. Design’s good. Baking; terrible. Oh, dear. Why’d you bring them out so early? They’re gone soft. Only one flavor…needs more color. So, they really start asking a lot of questions. We needed punchier flavors.
But they were just criticizing her flavors earlier. Then Michael goes. One has had a burst there. It burst quite badly, blew the whole thing out. Another one looks nicer. Overall image is amazing. The red is attractive. Painting is nice. Let’s see, they open it up. Looks good. Nice loaf. Flavor’s nice. Bake’s alright. Design’s good, but blown…even though the blow-out there…then we see everybody’s faces, mostly frowny. David’s stressed. Oh boy, Amelia’s stressed. It’d be gutting to leave. Brutal, David says. So, not happy campers. They say, okay, well, let’s start with the upbeat…Steph was great. This is the table talk. Michael; very good. Went well. Who’s at the bottom? Henry’s at the bottom. I mean, he won that technical, but…Amelia’s in trouble. Alice, maybe. Is it possible two people could go home?
Could be. So, they make us sweat. Then they come out. Noel gets to give the good news this week, 'cause I guess it’s Week 3? Star Baker is…they pause, they show some…Michael. He’s surprised and very happy. Everybody’s happy for him, which is so cute, even the judges and stuff. Sandi says, this gets tougher and tougher every week. The person who’s leaving us…they show David, Alice, and Amelia, switching between them, then Sandi. Amelia. Says, I knew it. Gutted. She knew Bread Week was gonna be tough and…to get through it. A lot of kisses for Amelia and hugs. Michael gives her a big hug twice. Sorry to see you go. Henry says, bread can take a hike. Alice says, I can't believe I made it.
Michael says, I’m overwhelmed. I’ll try making bread maybe a couple more times, but I’ll never score it again, and he laughs. They say, yeah, Michael did great this week, deserves Star Baker. He goes, I can go home now. A handshake and I won the week. Tick off…and yeah, and that’s the end of the episode. Pretty nice…well, I don't know, I was rooting for Amelia, so…I mean, it was nice for Michael, who’s cool, but…yeah, so…but the bake goes on, as…I don't know who sang that, but the bake will go…the bake will…the bake-off will be continue…be great when it’s great. Goodnight, everybody.
[END OF RECORDING]
(Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes)
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Baking Off to Sleep
Autocorrect
https://www.wired.com/2014/07/history-of-autocorrect/
https://gizmodo.com/the-untold-history-of-how-autocorrect-came-to-be-1609181601
https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/jwherrman/the-ancient-origins-of-autocorrect
GBBO S10/C7 E3 Review
https://www.vulture.com/2019/09/the-great-british-baking-show-season-10-episode-3-recap.html
https://ew.com/recap/the-great-british-baking-show-season-10-episode-3/
Bap
https://www.mashed.com/280288/what-is-a-bap-and-how-is-it-different-from-a-burger-bun/
https://www.pelliclemag.com/home/2021/2/15/bun-a-taxonomy-of-the-british-bread-roll
https://decider.com/2019/09/16/the-great-british-baking-show-burger-bap/
Science of Bread
https://www.thekitchn.com/the-science-behind-yeast-and-how-it-makes-bread-rise-226483
https://www.compoundchem.com/2016/01/13/bread/
https://www.exploratorium.edu/explore/cooking/bread-science
DOWN TO BUSINESS
Mispronouncing what I forget that I’m talking about
Competing against bread in general
Deep Dark Night United
Stephanie (Helix Sleep)
PLUGS
Hand in Hand; The Midnight Mission; The Trevor Project; Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Producer Russell; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline; Referral Program
SPONSORS
Wild Health; Polysleep; Odoo; Air Doctor Pro; Zocdoc; Progressive
INTRO
Thinking about how I called a person by the wrong name in an email …
Autocorrect Happens
Someone else probably can relate to how you’re feeling right now
Miswriting a person’s name
The cherry on top was that they were telling me that they didn’t like the show
I’m doing the best I can, man
I wish to change minds, but I know I can’t do that
A pointless, futile meander
Thanks for your expressing your frustration to me
Just so you know, I can also relate to overthinking
I’m not expecting you to respond to me talking about how I feel
The Sleep Podcast Advertising Conundrum
Most people need some Wind Down Time
Explaining the Show Structure
GBBO tonight
I’ve never seen a proving door in person
When I was a busboy, there were two drawers for warming rolls
Warm bread rolls were unnecessary, but nice
The meal shift sandwiches I got were good, but I never ate there
STORY
Bread Week, Ep 3
Noel is on the phone
Red shirt with gold ribbon print, and also chest flap cheetah print
One Off Fashion Shirts
Then everyone is wearing versions of the same shirt
Preview of Bread Sequence
Man, this teaser is stressful in itself
A lot of bread dread and bread puns
Sandi’s got a nice heartbreaker sweater
Paul is a big bread man
Filled Tear and Share Loaf
Gotta be yeasted, too
Henry doesn’t want to get charcoal on his jumper
Henry makes chicken pesto share and tear for his parents
His mom is a harsh critic
Seaweed from Pembershire for Michelle
Welsh Cheese and Welsh Rugby
Michael – Kerala flavors
His day job is being a fitness instructor
Chili coconut chutney
Rosie – Chili and manchego cheese, Spanish flavors
Rosie uses vet equipment in her bakes
Kneading Sequence
You have to juggle if you’re a comedian
Phil is honoring his family’s Italian heritage with a focaccia
Proving time
Steph is also doing pesto
Steph works 3 part-time jobs, one of which is selling trainers (shoes)
Priya – pepper, onion, almost pizza-ish
Smoked jalapeno share and tear with paprika and cheese
Amelia – harisa based, chorizo, onion, peppers, and garlic
Paul’s torso is like a baguette
Helena’s has doubled in size
Henry’s got his chicken stuffing
Phil is folding pancetta into his
Alice is doing baklava flavors
She had a sweets rebellion as a teenager because her parents are dentists
David is making cinnamon rolls
David is a potter as well
Vanilla buttercream and brandy-soaked fruit
Helena loves American style cinnamon rolls
She used to live in Las Vegas
I don’t make stuff like this usually
Then they have to do a second rise
Noel pretends he has bread legs
Steph is stressed
Helena pulls hers first
Everything looks pretty good at this time
Now they’re just waiting for it to bake
Amelia doesn’t like cheese
They start pulling with 5 minutes left
Michael’s and Priya’s look very fancy
Most of them look good
Bottoms look good for Rosie and Amelia
Time for decorating
I’ll try buttercream on cinnamon rolls anytime, David
Judgment time
Henry – black and white works, dramatic, nice, can only taste pesto, bit bland
Steph – good, but too dry and overbaked
Rosie – Prue loves it, great flavor
Alice – quite attractive, but dry and overbaked, great flavors
Amelia – irregular in size, a bit thrown together, too spicy for Prue, chop stuff smaller
David – interesting texture, too doughy, perfect bake
Helena – no tear and share because it’s all frosted, overbaked
Michelle – messy, rustic, cheesy, good texture, nice ideas
Phil – focaccia tree, nice flavors, nice loaf
Priya – 2 dipping sauces, cheesy, over proved
Michael – clever, pretty, colorful, nice bake, good flavors, HANDSHAKE
Michael gets the first handshake of the season!
Shrouded in Gingham
Technical – not as easy as you think
8 White Burger Baps
A floured bap – is that like a bun?
This is bread week, not burger week
Henry’s not a Bap Kind of Character
He’s more Whole Wheat Pita Bread
Kneading the Dough, then proving
Most people have never made veggie burgers, but Priya has
Noel does morse code on a bowl on Sandi’s head
Sandi genuinely loves this
How much should each bun weigh
Amelia has leftover dough
Quite a Pert Bun
Dust them in flour and bake them
Variable baking times
Frying the burgers until they’re browned
The colors of bap and burger make it harder to judge if they’re done
Assembly time
All of them make great burgers
Amelia realizes she was wrong
4 empty baps, and 4 with veggie burgers
Judgment
Steph – all the same, could’ve been wider, chewy, good buns, good burgers
Helena – breaking down, good flavor,
Rosie – burgers too big for buns, nice flavor for baps
Phil – buns too dark, crumbly
Alice – underproved, too small for burgers
David – nice roll, decent taste
Amelia – massively underproved, quite doughy
Michelle – too chewy, good burger flavor
Michael – small
Priya – rolled up well, not bad structure
Henry – look massive, right shape, great fit
Amelia is last
Henry wins the Technical! His first time making baps
Amelia regrets her 10% mistake
Day 2 Entry
Amelia, Rosie, and Alice are at the bottom
A display of artistic loaves
All about the scoring decoration
Michael is not confident
5 hours isn’t that much time, actually
Scoring bread is tough
Staggering times for different sized loaves
David – A trio of African masks in different colors, deep sourdough flavor, more yeast for time
Henry – fougasse, a lot of rye breads, light scoring on his
Paul wants heavy scoring
Alice is kneading
First round of doughs getting shaped and proved
Alice wants hers to taste like stuffing
Global Bread – delish
Priya is doing a tropical theme
No fake colors
Steph is doing a hand-tied muted bouquet with natural colors
Rosie’s exotic bread safari
Michael – Mediterranean Campfire
Helena – continued commitment to all things spooky
More Halloween theming
Helena has laryngitis so Noel is her voice
Phil – a Winner’s Wreath
Michelle – a whole bunch of breads for a garden scene
Amelia is doing garden life on a micro level
Time for scoring the first batch
Rosie is very artistic
Henry questions his choices
Second prove ends
Amelia briefly loses her score
More Scoring Stress
One of Henry’s is stuck to his sheet
David’s masks are split, but they still look really cool
Helena is doing one of her breads in a cast iron pot
Some people are painting their breads
Henry struggles to get paper off one of his bread
Steph does a yoga squat
Is that rip intentional?
David is very worried
Time is up
Judgment Time
Rosie – Bread Safari, great scoring, gray loaf, could have more flavor
Alice – nice definition, clever, nice nuts and seed, lovely flavor, could use more seasoning
David – broken but brilliant, barely done, not enough salt, all style no substance
Helena – imaginative, lost some definition in cuts, dense old loaf, not good flavor
Henry – Paper stuck on here, tough fougasse, under proved, underbaked
Steph – highly effective, could’ve been baked more, great flavor, lovely structure, excellent
Priya – beautiful painting, more scoring less painting, great structure, needs more flavor
Phil – ingenious, surprisingly light, delicious
Michelle – effective, nice scoring, lost some definition, good color on some, nice flavor, could’ve been crustier, rye is quite stodgy
Amelia – clumsy scoring, no finesse, good design, terrible baking, only one flavor, needed more flavor
Michael – one really burst, good image, good color, nice loaf, nice flavor, alright bake
Mostly Frowny Faces
David and Amelia are really stressed
Table Talk
Steph and Michael are at the top
Henry, Amelia, Alice are at the bottom
Michael is Star Baker!
Amelia is going home
Lots of hugs and kisses for Amelia
Michael is overwhelmed
The Bake Will Go On
TWITTER SHOUTOUT THANKS
Jess, Faith, Djinn, Anne, Jeanine, Rakun, Kendra, Jamie, Maria, How Fine, Jim, Theodore, Zany, Brian, Faith, Sarah, Antonia, Christina, Emma, Harry, Rin, Robinson, Larry, Chloe, Paula, Rainn, Luke
SUMMARY:
Episode: 1,230
Title: Bread Week | Baking Off to Sleep S10/C7 E3
Deep Dark Night United: Stephanie (Helix Sleep)
Plugs: Hand in Hand; The Midnight Mission; The Trevor Project; Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Producer Russell; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline; Referral Program
Sponsors: Wild Health; Polysleep; Odoo; Air Doctor Pro; Zocdoc; Progressive
Twitter Shoutout Thanks: Jess, Faith, Djinn, Anne, Jeanine, Rakun, Kendra, Jamie, Maria, How Fine, Jim, Theodore, Zany, Brian, Faith, Sarah, Antonia, Christina, Emma, Harry, Rin, Robinson, Larry, Chloe, Paula, Rainn, Luke
Notable Language:
- Autocorrect Happens
- The Sleep Podcast Advertising Conundrum
- Busser
- Holy Bread Drawer
- One Off Fashion Shirts
- Bread Dread
- Kneading Sequence
- Shrouded in Gingham
- Floured Bap
- Quite a Pert Bun
- Global Bread
- Caterpillar Transformation
- More Scoring Stress
Notable Culture:
- Great British Bake Off
- Fred Astaire
- Toy Safari
Notable Talking Points:
- Thinking about how I called a person by the wrong name in an email …
- Autocorrect Happens
- Someone else probably can relate to how you’re feeling right now
- Miswriting a person’s name
- The cherry on top was that they were telling me that they didn’t like the show
- I’m doing the best I can, man
- I wish to change minds, but I know I can’t do that
- A pointless, futile meander
- Thanks for your expressing your frustration to me
- Just so you know, I can also relate to overthinking
- I’m not expecting you to respond to me talking about how I feel
- The Sleep Podcast Advertising Conundrum
- Most people need some Wind Down Time
- Explaining the Show Structure
- GBBO tonight
- I’ve never seen a proving door in person
- When I was a busboy, there were two drawers for warming rolls
- Warm bread rolls were unnecessary, but nice
- The meal shift sandwiches I got were good, but I never ate there
- Filled Tear and Share Loaf
- Bread Week, Ep 3
- Noel is on the phone
- Red shirt with gold ribbon print, and also chest flap cheetah print
- One Off Fashion Shirts
- Then everyone is wearing versions of the same shirt
- Preview of Bread Sequence
- Man, this teaser is stressful in itself
- A lot of bread dread and bread puns
- Sandi’s got a nice heartbreaker sweater
- Paul is a big bread man
- Filled Tear and Share Loaf
- Gotta be yeasted, too
- Henry doesn’t want to get charcoal on his jumper
- Henry makes chicken pesto share and tear for his parents
- His mom is a harsh critic
- Seaweed from Pembershire for Michelle
- Welsh Cheese and Welsh Rugby
- Michael – Kerala flavors
- His day job is being a fitness instructor
- Chili coconut chutney
- Rosie – Chili and manchego cheese, Spanish flavors
- Rosie uses vet equipment in her bakes
- Kneading Sequence
- You have to juggle if you’re a comedian
- Phil is honoring his family’s Italian heritage with a focaccia
- Proving time
- Steph is also doing pesto
- Steph works 3 part-time jobs, one of which is selling trainers (shoes)
- Priya – pepper, onion, almost pizza-ish
- Smoked jalapeno share and tear with paprika and cheese
- Amelia – harisa based, chorizo, onion, peppers, and garlic
- Paul’s torso is like a baguette
- Helena’s has doubled in size
- Henry’s got his chicken stuffing
- Phil is folding pancetta into his
- Alice is doing baklava flavors
- She had a sweets rebellion as a teenager because her parents are dentists
- David is making cinnamon rolls
- David is a potter as well
- Vanilla buttercream and brandy-soaked fruit
- Helena loves American style cinnamon rolls
- She used to live in Las Vegas
- I don’t make stuff like this usually
- Then they have to do a second rise
- Noel pretends he has bread legs
- Steph is stressed
- Helena pulls hers first
- Everything looks pretty good at this time
- Now they’re just waiting for it to bake
- Amelia doesn’t like cheese
- They start pulling with 5 minutes left
- Michael’s and Priya’s look very fancy
- Most of them look good
- Bottoms look good for Rosie and Amelia
- Time for decorating
- I’ll try buttercream on cinnamon rolls anytime, David
- Judgment time
- Henry – black and white works, dramatic, nice, can only taste pesto, bit bland
- Steph – good, but too dry and overbaked
- Rosie – Prue loves it, great flavor
- Alice – quite attractive, but dry and overbaked, great flavors
- Amelia – irregular in size, a bit thrown together, too spicy for Prue, chop stuff smaller
- David – interesting texture, too doughy, perfect bake
- Helena – no tear and share because it’s all frosted, overbaked
- Michelle – messy, rustic, cheesy, good texture, nice ideas
- Phil – focaccia tree, nice flavors, nice loaf
- Priya – 2 dipping sauces, cheesy, over proved
- Michael – clever, pretty, colorful, nice bake, good flavors, HANDSHAKE
- Michael gets the first handshake of the season!
- Shrouded in Gingham
- Technical – not as easy as you think
- 8 White Burger Baps
- A floured bap – is that like a bun?
- This is bread week, not burger week
- Henry’s not a Bap Kind of Character
- He’s more Whole Wheat Pita Bread
- Kneading the Dough, then proving
- Most people have never made veggie burgers, but Priya has
- Noel does morse code on a bowl on Sandi’s head
- Sandi genuinely loves this
- How much should each bun weigh
- Amelia has leftover dough
- Quite a Pert Bun
- Dust them in flour and bake them
- Variable baking times
- Frying the burgers until they’re browned
- The colors of bap and burger make it harder to judge if they’re done
- Assembly time
- All of them make great burgers
- Amelia realizes she was wrong
- 4 empty baps, and 4 with veggie burgers
- Judgment
- Steph – all the same, could’ve been wider, chewy, good buns, good burgers
- Helena – breaking down, good flavor,
- Rosie – burgers too big for buns, nice flavor for baps
- Phil – buns too dark, crumbly
- Alice – underproved, too small for burgers
- David – nice roll, decent taste
- Amelia – massively underproved, quite doughy
- Michelle – too chewy, good burger flavor
- Michael – small
- Priya – rolled up well, not bad structure
- Henry – look massive, right shape, great fit
- Amelia is last
- Henry wins the Technical! His first time making baps
- Amelia regrets her 10% mistake
- Day 2 Entry
- Amelia, Rosie, and Alice are at the bottom
- A display of artistic loaves
- All about the scoring decoration
- Michael is not confident
- 5 hours isn’t that much time, actually
- Scoring bread is tough
- Staggering times for different sized loaves
- David – A trio of African masks in different colors, deep sourdough flavor, more yeast for time
- Henry – fougasse, a lot of rye breads, light scoring on his
- Paul wants heavy scoring
- Alice is kneading
- First round of doughs getting shaped and proved
- Alice wants hers to taste like stuffing
- Global Bread – delish
- Priya is doing a tropical theme
- No fake colors
- Steph is doing a hand-tied muted bouquet with natural colors
- Rosie’s exotic bread safari
- Michael – Mediterranean Campfire
- Helena – continued commitment to all things spooky
- More Halloween theming
- Helena has laryngitis so Noel is her voice
- Phil – a Winner’s Wreath
- Michelle – a whole bunch of breads for a garden scene
- Amelia is doing garden life on a micro level
- Time for scoring the first batch
- Rosie is very artistic
- Henry questions his choices
- Second prove ends
- Amelia briefly loses her score
- More Scoring Stress
- One of Henry’s is stuck to his sheet
- David’s masks are split, but they still look really cool
- Helena is doing one of her breads in a cast iron pot
- Some people are painting their breads
- Henry struggles to get paper off one of his bread
- Steph does a yoga squat
- Is that rip intentional?
- David is very worried
- Time is up
- Judgment Time
- Rosie – Bread Safari, great scoring, gray loaf, could have more flavor
- Alice – nice definition, clever, nice nuts and seed, lovely flavor, could use more seasoning
- David – broken but brilliant, barely done, not enough salt, all style no substance
- Helena – imaginative, lost some definition in cuts, dense old loaf, not good flavor
- Henry – Paper stuck on here, tough fougasse, under proved, underbaked
- Steph – highly effective, could’ve been baked more, great flavor, lovely structure, excellent
- Priya – beautiful painting, more scoring less painting, great structure, needs more flavor
- Phil – ingenious, surprisingly light, delicious
- Michelle – effective, nice scoring, lost some definition, good color on some, nice flavor, could’ve been crustier, rye is quite stodgy
- Amelia – clumsy scoring, no finesse, good design, terrible baking, only one flavor, needed more flavor
- Michael – one really burst, good image, good color, nice loaf, nice flavor, alright bake
- Mostly Frowny Faces
- David and Amelia are really stressed
- Table Talk
- Steph and Michael are at the top
- Henry, Amelia, Alice are at the bottom
- Michael is Star Baker!
- Amelia is going home
- Lots of hugs and kisses for Amelia
- Michael is overwhelmed
- The Bake Will Go On