1142 – Casserole O’Brien | Sleep With TNG S4E12

Notable Language:

• What the double hockey sticks
• Positronic Matrix
• Pop your top in the turbo lift

Notable Culture:

• Lore podcast
• “Sabotage” – Beastie Boys
• Blarney Stone

Notable Talking Points:

• Memories of Relationship Coupons
• An Ode to a Casserole
• Good Old Stompy

Episode 1142 – Casserole O'Brien | Sleep With TNG S4 E12

 

[START OF RECORDING]

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the Enterprise…whoops; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, whether you’re on a voyage, you’re enterprising, or the Enterprise is beyond you…you say well, I guess I’m not sure what…what is the Enterprise? It’s been used…now it’s…isn’t is a place you go and rent a car? No, I said the Enterprise. I don’t know which…I don’t even know which gen…I mean, it’s The Next Generation, but you know…also, I don’t know what I’m talking about because…and if you say, this guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about, that means you may be in the right place ‘cause it’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that’s here to put you to sleep.

 

We do it with a bedtime story to take your mind off of stuff and keep you company because you deserve a good night’s sleep. This podcast, it does take some getting used to. Sometimes it takes two or three tries before you realize oh, this show never gets started and never goes anywhere. I’m not supposed to…I’m supposed to just barely listen to you. So, see how it goes. But really, the reason I make the show and the reason so many people listen is because we believe you deserve a good night’s sleep. The one thing that connects us is we know how it feels in the deep, dark night.

 

We might not know exactly what you’re going through, but we can probably relate or someone listening right now can relate to how it feels, and I’d like to help. The way I do it is this show…it starts out with some support, then there will be a long, meandering intro that’s meant to ease you into bedtime, and then we’ll start talking about Star Trek: The Next Generation in a very indirect and oblique way. Then we’ll have some thank-yous at the end. So, it’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. Thanks for making it possible, my patron peeps. 

 

INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake, whether it’s thoughts on your mind, thoughts you’re thinking about about the past, the present, the future. Thoughts, you know. You say, okay, thinking about those thoughts, or those thoughts are here right now while I’m trying to go to sleep.

 

So, it could be thoughts, it could be feelings, anything emotionally coming up for you related to those thoughts, or it could be physical sensations, changes in time, temperature, routine. You could have…you got stuff going on. Whatever it is that’s keeping you awake, it could be something else. I’m here to take your mind off of stuff and keep you company so that you could fall asleep, or while you fall asleep. As I said earlier, the reason I make the show…and if you don’t hear anything else I say or you never listen to the podcast again, it doesn’t change the fact you do deserve a good night’s sleep.

 

You deserve a bedtime you could look forward to or at least feel neutral about and not dread, because that’s the situation I’ve been in on and off my whole life and a lot of other listeners have, and I’d prefer if it’s possible for this show to work or to introduce you to another sleep podcast that’ll work for you so that you have something to look forward to at bedtime. You say okay, well, at least I got that podcast or maybe I got a good book and that podcast, or I’m gonna do some doodling and some winding down and I’ve got that podcast, or I’m gonna play a little ColorKu or do a Sudoku, and then while I listen to that podcast…whatever it is, yeah, I hope you…I hope this podcast can at least introduce you to the idea and the fact that you deserve a good night’s sleep.

 

You deserve enough sleep where your life is more manageable and you have that foundation, and ideally you could build from there and be out there flourishing. That means our world’s a better place to be in. But the other side of it is I make the show…and a lot of people are nodding right now along…maybe nodding off but also nodding along, saying yeah, you deserve a good night’s sleep. We know how it feels. We know how it feels; trouble getting to sleep, trouble staying asleep…whatever it is. A lot of us have been there. So, that’s what I make the show…or why I make the show. What I’ll do is I'll send my voice across the deep, dark night. I'll use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents.

 

So, that means I’m gonna get mixed up, I’ll go off topic, then I’ll repeat myself, and then I’ll forget what I was talking about. Then I’ll say, what was Data’s mother’s…brother’s name again? Lore. Oh, but there’s a podcast called Lore unrelated to Data’s brother called Lore. I wonder if they’ve ever…if there’s ever been a…what is that thing called in the movies where they sneak something in? It’s not a cupcake or a cookie. It’s not a marshmallow, either. How come I can never remember that? I’m not kidding, either. I’m saying that…it’s not a cup…what is it when they hid…hide something in a movie? It’s not a cupcake. Every time I think it’s a cupcake and then I say well, it’s…must be a cookie. No. Not a sprinkle. Is it some sort of candy? An Easter egg; oh, boy. So, it’s not sweet.

 

Maybe I’ll remember it now and say oh, it’s a Easter egg. Easter eggs aren’t technically sweet. Oh boy, don’t take that personally, Easter egg. You’re sweet. The one Easter egg that’s listening…oh boy, are you sweet, or I’m sweet on you. You say Scoots, are you assuming all Easter eggs are Cadbury eggs? ‘Cause those are…I say no, no, I realize those are two different things. No, I realize that. I’m not saying that, no. Alls I was saying is I’ve always get…I can never remember ‘Easter egg’. Regular listeners…but what I was wondering…I was trying to give an example of a superfluous tangent and a…whatever the other one…pointless meander, and then I ended up giving two. I gave…give…I’m giving both of them by…naturally. Au naturel.

 

‘Cause somehow I was wondering if there was ever a Easter egg in the podcast Lore about…if they mentioned…but would that be a Easter egg? ‘Cause isn’t a Easter egg supposed to be self-referential? So, maybe if they had…well, I don’t know how they’d do…how would you do that, then? You could have a character in a story with a brother named Lore, maybe. I don’t know. I don’t know; these are questions I’m not fit to answer. I’m only fit to speculate and go off topic. But just a question; is…has Lore ever been mentioned on Lore? Lore on Lore; there’s a podcast idea. It’s a recap of the podcast Lore, featuring Data’s brother, Lore. Data and Lore would even be better. Then they could even…that could be how it opens or it could be a unresolved bit.

 

You know I love those, where Data always says, how come it’s only called Lore on Lore and…but I’m on it? I’m technically…I’m playing both roles if you want to get technical, but technically, dear brother, we’re here to talk about Lore, and I’m Lore. I’m talking about Lore. Then Data would say yeah, but I’m also on the show. I’m a co…well, no, you’re not a co-host, ‘cause it’s called Lore on Lore, dear brother. Then people would say, I thought this was a sleep podcast to put me to sleep. Am I in the wrong place? I’d say no, this is…that was…that just…what I meant when I say creaky, dulcet tones; that’s my voice. Not traditionally soothing. Then what happens is I get caught up in these thoughts. Next thing you know I’m producing a new imaginary podcast within my imagination that’s never been released, even imaginarily.

 

But it’s not a horrible idea, either. That’s the thing. You say well, if you could get…first of all, do you know Data and Lore are fictional characters, Scoots? Okay. So, that would be the first hurdle. But the second…so, no, no, this would be a in-world podcast. What do you mean? Well, isn’t Picard still running? Lore and Data…somewhere on a space station somewhere, they listened to a…’cause they would be…the podcast Lore would have existed in their timeline, I would think. So, they’re listening to the pod…they’re making a podcast in our future. You’re with me, right? This is all possible. Replicator, make me a podcasting…there’s not actually a podcasting kit. I mean, you can buy them. But you say…I’d say I bet you those ships…I don’t know what the…what is that called? The climate control noises.

 

That would be the only hard part on that ship, and the whirring. But then, so…but we could do it. I’m sure it’d be great, maybe. Oh, so what’s…? Oh, sorry. I went off topic again. None of that intentionally. I mean, naturally. But okay, so this is a show…a podcast that’s here to…well, this is a bit ironic. Is that the right word? It’s quixotic, for sure. Thanks, Lore. No problem, dear brother. Oh no, I’m not your brother. Oh wait, you’re in my…I’m playing you both imaginarily. Okay. So, okay…so, where was I? So anyway, the podcast…what was I saying? Oh, so, this is a podcast that’s here to keep you company and help you fall asleep. It’s not a podcast that you actually listen to. You could listen or you can listen, and some people listen all the way to the very end of the show.

 

If you can’t sleep for some reason, there are other people that can’t sleep that are listening or people that listen during the day for a break or people that just listen to unwind. But you can also just barely listen. That’s the most common use case, where you say okay, you’re talking and you think you’re making sense, Scoots. Or you say, this is a reasonable idea. You don’t see the holes in your own idea. Well, I say no, I’m sure Lore’s…and Data would be hard to work with. As a podcast producer, I have to work with Scoots and Drew, so I can see the downside. But yeah, so this is a pod…you just kinda listen to. You could turn me down to a mumble if you want or you could just kinda listen and not pay attention. This show is also a sleep podcast that doesn’t put you to sleep.

 

I’m here to keep you company, to be your friend in the deep, dark night, your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bestie, your bore-bor, your neigh-bore, your bore-bud, your bore-friend to keep you company. Just like you were gonna call somebody and say hey, talk to me for a while, but I’m not gonna listen to you. Or you say hey, tell me about your day, but I don’t…it’s…I’m not really invest…I’m more invested in falling asleep, but I want to hear about your day in a soothing way. Those are all one-time…you can only cash that in for one time per relationship per year, like those coupons I used to give people as gifts…that I say, please…it was a gift card. Good for one load of laundry. Good for one floor-mopping, mom. Happy Mother’s Day. It’s a coupon pack.

 

Here, let me hold onto those coupons for you. Who would have thought? That was the same person. That kid invented gift cards or at least pitched it to the companies. They say, people will lose track of these. They said, I used to give them to my mother all the time. Window…wash your car, pop. I was one of the few people that brought that into adulthood in a…it was a bad idea. What does that have to do with anything? I don’t even know. But…oh, you could do that once a year with somebody in your real life. But I’m just here to talk while you barely listen or you can listen or you can wake up and tune back in. So, it’s a show that doesn’t put you to sleep, doesn’t really…you can’t…you can listen to it but you don’t have to. No pressure to fall asleep, no pressure to listen. That’s what I mean.

 

The structure of the show; that’s the next thing. Oh no, well, the strangeness of the podcast…now, this show does not work for everybody, but for most people it doesn’t…that it does work for, took two or three tries, sometimes over years. Some of our most…people that actually pay twenty bucks a month to support the show…is a common level I heard from that said I loathed you at first. Now I pay you because you put me to sleep every single night and I know how much work it is. So, give it a few tries and just see how it goes, because this podcast is different. If you had trouble falling asleep, you’ve probably tried a lot of different stuff and paid for a lot of different stuff. So, just see how it goes. What was my point there? Oh, it’s a podcast…oh, just see how it goes. Yeah.

 

If you’re skeptical or doubtful, I would be, too. Oh, the structure of the show. So, the show starts out with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, so you feel seen and welcome. You say oh, I could check that show out and see how it goes. So, try that. You say, okay…then there’s support for the show so it can be free twice a week, and then there’s our intro, which is separate from the support. The intro goes on and on and on kinda to start the podcast, and there are a few percentage of listeners that fall asleep during it. There’s a percentage of listeners that skip it. But for most people, it just offers a buffer between being awake and being asleep, a wind-down time. You could do some other activity or you could get ready for bed or you could be in bed getting comfortable.

 

But that’s why we have an intro instead of just going straight into the story, is to have a little buffer, like a…Scoots is slowly…obviously my light’s already dim, but I’m lowering the dimmer switch a little bit. So, that’s the intro. Then again there’s support between the intro and the story so the show is free or optional to pay for, and then there’s…we’ll cover a episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation but in a very indirect and dull way, so don’t worry. You say, I don’t even know…what…I say yeah, that’s exactly it. So, it’ll be a bit more like a bedtime story than…with a TV recap and then some thank-yous at the end. So that’s the structure of the show, that’s why I make the show. I’m really glad you’re here. I really appreciate you checking the podcast out and coming by. I really hope I can help you fall asleep, and here's a couple of ways I'm able to do it for you for free twice a week.

 

Alright everybody, Scoots here. We’re talking about Star Trek: The Next Generation, Season 4, Episode 12. The Somebody Who’s Having a Tough Time Right Now is not the title of the episode, but it’s somebody that’s had a hard time and it doesn’t take…I didn’t realize it but it’s like okay, I figured…I know who that is. Or maybe it’s more than one person, I guess. Let me read through the notes and then I’ll hit Play on the episode. Starts out with mapping. Swing? Survey. Renee tundril? 21503. Be on the lookout. Even with Trudy…Picard stargazer days. On the run…believe it. Worf…no hour. Don’t trust…trust is earned. No green away…I did do…watch this episode writing the notes in my car in the dark. Working for a sail ship…picking and fock O’Brien…oh, waiting for something…shop. Waiting for a something ship.

 

Picking and food…so, O’Brien…oh, plastic fork…fork? Not a fish? Very healthy. Feed shine? Feed shine. Heavy foods. O’Brien sighs. Mom did not believe in a replicator. Handled raw meat? Real meat? This is kinda funny. This is one of these first humorous exchanges I’ve been aware of where it’s like, oh…it’s Kako and O’Brien eating dinner. We get a sense of their relationship ‘cause she normally prepares the dinner or chooses the menu. O’Brien is picking at his food. Then he talks about the food his mom used to make. He says we should eat some of that. I’ll even prepare it. In the replicator, of course, but he said my mom prepared food. Then there’s even some hubba-hubba talk, but it’s interrupted by a Red Alert. Laser sounds…Cardassians. So, we can send you on this Cardassian exploration ship.

 

Firing…Riker…what the double hockey sticks is he doing? Sharper pen? Escaping dunes? Evasive…delta…delta evasive pattern or evasive pattern delta. Duvet ilcet costumes…power failure. Usually I have the…I do this in a different way, so…but I think it’s fun to do…just off the notes without it on-screen. Shrinking down…answer on har…now? Wow. In darkness…W-A-R. What is it good for? Two days ago…Federation ship, unarmed. Gul Macet…peace. Not us. Let me call my boss. One hour. Yeah, you would be disappoint…you would be at a dis…you would be at disappointed. Very well; one hour. Oh, Picard tells them…so, basically this Cardassian ship starts firing on the Enterprise unexpectedly, ‘cause they were supposed to meet up. That’s when Riker says what in the hockey sticks are you doing?

 

They take evasive action. Take out their shield generations on the Cardassian ship. Then they call back. That’s a pretty standard move for the Enterprise, which makes sense. Then Picard says by the way…I say, let’s work this out. I’ll call my boss, or the Admiral. A better admiral than last time. This admiral’s before the last one. Picard goes by the way, you’d be at a disadvantage anyway with us because we already took out your shield generators and our ship’s more advanced or something. Something about Ben Maxwell. WTF. Silent running. So basically…21505…go and find him with the Cardassian cooperation…with observers. Not prepared for a new conflict. Proven the peace or preserve the peace. Haden out. Science 11…I don’t know what science 11 means. It definitely says science 11, though. Maybe not.

 

I don’t know. But so, basically this scene is…this dude Ben Maxwell started…stopped contacting…went and started running their own campaign against the Cardassians and has not contacted base and is disrupting the peace…or the fragile peace between the Cardassians and the…what was that? The Federation. I guess…again, I’m not sure on the seasons…the history of the seasons, but this could be after one of the Borg things where there’s…they say well, we don’t got the resources to deal with this, anyway. Pretty sure this was after Picard was a Borg. Maybe not, though. Probably. What is this, Season 5? Troi, stay close to the crew, because everybody’s gonna…this is gonna…strong feelings. Who served with Ben Maxwell? O’Brien did. Indeed. Data…by the way, Data has access to all the personnel files.

 

I don’t know if he has to…if Data has to be told to access them. Like, they’re password-protected…unless the superior…higher officer implements a search? ‘Cause I say…does Data ever say that? Like oh, by the way, how’s the rash…Geordie, how’s that rash doing? Still bugging you? They say, what are you…looking in my…? Well, no, I’m not looking there. It’s just a part of my…your personnel’s file is part of my brain, my positronic matrix, man. You say, can you keep my med…can you put a hip on that thing or something? Because I don’t need you…I don’t need my personnel file being a part of your positronic matrix. I’d prefer that it’s not the case. Welcome to the Enterprise, Gul Macet. Glen and Dora or something…Gul…I don’t know. We’ll get to that. Tils and Daro or something.

 

Troi looks back at O’Brien who’s staring at the Cardassians. A lot of…as with a lot of TNG episodes, a lot of good pause…face…on faces and stuff. Captain’s Log. Quest for the Phoenix. Scan…ten lightyears. No sign. In fact, we are skeptical. That’s what the Cardassian says. Of course. Very well. O’Brien, Captain Maxwell. Well, he’s…there’s a…they say, Captain Picard, you ever listen to the Beastie Boys? Picard says, proceed. O’Brien says well, Captain Maxwell is big into that one album with the guy with the…the one…I can’t stand it, I know you planned it, I’m gonna set it straight, this Watergate. Picard doesn’t show a sign of recognition. He goes listen, it’s a sabotage. Picard goes, I…O’Brien, you’re gonna have to speak in present tense for me. He says well, I don’t know. No speculation. Oh no, then he says confine things to the facts.

 

I think he says this…I don’t think he says this to O’Brien, but…locate the Phoenix. Bridge…O’Brien…two Cardassians…oh, they go on the…Cardassian…O’Brien gets on the lift with two Cardassians and there’s a total stare-down. Deck 6, Deck 10. Hey, why don’t you join us for a drink on Ten Forward? The Cardassians say to O’Brien, we’d like to talk about transponders and stuff or whatever they’re called, transporters. Your captain is most impressive. O’Brien tells him to take a hike. I choose my business, or something. I choose who I spend my time with, or whatever. I’ll follow orders. Total burn. Captain suggests captain…dipluminary…you will not give us news. Dipluminary…diplomary…diplomacy. You will not give us…something. O’Brien…dinner daily…casserole. Oh, so then O’Brien pulls a casserole out.

 

O’Brien’s singing. What are you singing, honey? This is O’Brien and Kako. Oh, something from the Rutledge. Hair and glory and mashed potatoes or something. The mustard bay…O’Brien sings. Captain Maxwell…like that song. I like this kid who sang the song to him. Maybe he says that later in the episode. Kako realizes her husband is…this is not complimentary of O’Brien, but the look on Kako’s face…she says well, this is the man I married. This is why I love him. He’s different than anybody else on the Enterprise. Then she says, what are these? He goes, capers. Why? Feelings. I feel…I feel for her…our map. Can you read it? Our transponder codes…this is back on the Bridge. We have a warship…or stand time while ship is discharged. Picard and Riker share a look. Lots of stress. Very well, Mr. Worf.

 

Long beat. Picard and Worf…Mr. Worf, now. Picard face…and then they go to a commercial. Moving on Phoenix…Fred on Phoenix outside. On magic fives…torpedoes…fire…oh, so basically they catch up with the Phoenix and it’s flying and taking out Cardassian ships. Everyone onboard is like, what in the what? Destroys a warship, Nebula-class, and a science or transport vehicle. They’re watching all this on the map from far, far away. Sixteen hours away at Warp 4. Picard says hit Warp 9. Straight to…from 4 or 5 to 9. Lots of stress. Then O’Brien’s working with a bunch of SD cards. Then Picard…or somebody goes, can we talk about Ben Maxwell again? Ben Maxwell is a rare one. I got to work with two of the finest captains in Starfleet. So, it is Picard or maybe somebody else. I don’t know.

 

What’s going wrong with this dude, man? He’s gone well, well, well into the deep end. Well, there’s a reason. He took it…oh, so then he says he always was a…he listened to the Beastie Boys, but he kept his beastie boy repressed. Kept it all inside like a good guy would. Wrong, but…he even smiled all the time, even when he was in a bad mood, and joked about it. I’m totally here to tell jokes; I’m not in a bad mood at all. Not at all. It’s deep down inside. I like the fine watch…you back…he must have his rooms…he must have his reasons. Picard gets irritated but he says anger’s like old leather, man. Chief does not get it, though. Ten Forward…kay-noir? Kanar; that’s what the dude is drinking, the Cardassian. O’Brien kind of apologizes. He says, mind if I join you? Sure. Why don’t you have another fake ale? Sure.

 

Takes a bit of feat…getting used to the Kanar. O’Brien says I owe you an apology. This has been hard on all of us, the Cardassian says. Terrible mistake. O’Brien talks about struggled phasar…O’Brien very peaceful. Not what I believe because of you. So, O’Brien tells a little bit of his backstory to the Cardassian and why he’s irritable. Barking…I will protest this. Stealthing info…no ham. Does go…go to your quarters. So, they catch one of the Cardassians stealing info, the head Cardassian. Gul Macet says go to your quarters. As you wish, Mr. Worf. Please accompany. Then the Cardassian says Picard, can we see…speak in private? Sure. Deeply regret this. We’re here to make lasting peace, right? There are those who crave war. Not us, though, right? We’ve had our full measure.

 

Then they get twenty-two minutes of the Phoenix…they go on Picard’s face. Maxwell’s ship…Maxwell looks behind him…oh, so then they get to Maxwell’s ship. They say, tell him to get aboard the ship, stat. Maxwell, whatever, transporters in. He looks behind him, like maybe somebody was cracking a joke on his ship. I don’t know. Says, did anybody transport in with me or something? I don’t know. Then he points at O’Brien. No idea…I don’t know. Best I see your commander. He winks at O’Brien. O’Brien’s face…Riker…I have no idea what this says. I deserves the…shake hands…please sit down. Huff. You must think I’ve gone mad. Where is your documentation? I can smell it. So, O’Brien says these Cardassians are up to nothing. Picard says, you don’t have any proof of nothing.

 

This is just based on your thoughts and your feelings. He gets up. Nobody’s gonna tell me. It is for a…it’s a scientific station. Then he starts using these terms which…you’d say maybe they wrote this…’cause he says well, these are just bureaucrats. They don’t know…you should…great exchange. Not under fire. Who lives…smell…then he burns Picard; he goes, it smells musty in here, like a bureaucrat’s office. I’d say, if it was a bureaucrat’s office, wouldn’t they…I mean, maybe a storage room, but it wouldn’t smell musty because if there’s…unless they didn’t use their office. I don’t know what you’re trying to say. What’s your name again? Captain…I even put…I put some stuff about this guy I couldn’t even share on the show. Does that say inscrutable? I doubt it does. Not true, not true.

 

Then he goes, you’re a fool, Picard. Come with me. You’re going to Starbase 211 to get your next orders. Starfleet…I’ll let you go there on your ship in dignity, as a commander, and…or you can come in the Bridge and go in disgrace. He goes, I’ll return to the ship. I understand my orders. Picard calls Worf…goes to window. Picard goes to his window and looks out. Captain’s Log; three hours ago we called Haden. Phoenix changed course. Pursue. Hail Maxwell. Did anybody else say Maxwell’s Silver Hammer over and over again when they were listen…watching this? Party of one…priority one message. No response. Warp 8. Maxwell went to Warp 9? Go to Warp 9. Arm the phasers. Call O’Brien; he was his tactical officer. On-Bridge action…high-power subspace field. Maxwell is hailing us. Proof…I got proof.

 

Super close-up of Maxwell. Slow down. He goes, why don’t you stop these ships and inspect them? Picard goes, that’s not part of the deal, man. My job is to bust you. Let me…then O’Brien says let me beam over there and try to deal with him. Make it so. O’Brien shows up at…what’s…Maxwell’s Ready Room. The darn ship…count on it. There is no war. It’s over. O’Brien’s sidekick…oh, so then they talk about this guy Kaden…Stampy or whatever his name was. He used to sing for Maxwell. Goes oh yeah, I liked that. Then they sing a duet, which wasn’t bad. He goes, I’m gonna go down for this one, or some…I’m not gonna go, or something. They go, Captain’s Log Supplemental; he’s confined to quarters on our ship. Thank you, O’Brien. Loyalty ambassador…misplaced…does not come easy. Loyalty was earned.

 

We have a capacity, but not…dismiss him. One more thing…I was here to protect the peace. Take this message, Gul Macet. We’ll be watching. Then there’s music at the end, kinda like organ music. Alright everybody, I got this thing rolling. Oh boy, not anymore. Just jumped…I don’t want to learn more. Okay, there’s a ad running, so…it is for Lower Decks, which…it looks like there’s different characters on Lower Decks than the Lower Decks episode we covered. Now it’s rolling. I got it…Captain’s Log 44429.6. One of my favorite stations. A year since the peace treaty ended, long…ended the long conflict between us and Cardassia. Now it’s when they’re going into Sector 21503. Be on the lookout for that Cardassian ship. They should let us know soon. I gotta keep this thing peaceful up on this border.

 

I remember…this is when Picard says back in the…we were running against a Cardassian ship on the Stargazer. Troi says, you running? Picard says, believe it. Preliminary overtures to a truce…lowered my shields as a gesture, and they were not impressed. Had already taken out most of my engines and stuff. That’s when Worf says no honor. I don’t trust them. Troi says, they’re our allies now. We have to trust them. Nope, trust is earned, Worf says, not given away. Riker…Picard laughs. I don’t know what he’s laughing at, though. Hope they get…we don’t want to stick around here for so long. Okay, then we see the dinner with Kako and O’Brien. What’s this dinner, he says, hon? Plankton loaf, kelp buds, and sea berries. Oh. It’s good for you, bro. He goes huh, how about…I’m not a fish. She says, it’s healthy, man.

 

I had this every morning growing up. No muffins or oatmeal? Muffins aren’t good for you, by the way. Corned beef and eggs for breakfast? I don’t know how long they’ve been married, but Kako…you’ve been introducing me to this wonderful food. I’d like to do the same. By the way, get married if you’re on the Enterprise, ‘cause they got a dining room or a dining area. Scalloped potatoes, mutton shanks, and oxtails and cabbage. Oh, you’ll love it. Just like when I sing. She goes, your mom cooked? She didn’t believe in replicators. She thought real food was better. Real meat…it’s so…such a strange thing that she’s…she cut it? He goes, yeah. Wow. He goes, I’ll use the replicator, though. I’ll make you something special tonight. You’ll love it. I promise. That’s when they say hubba-hubba-hubba.

 

I don’t think…I didn’t think we’re mature enough for this show now. Then this Red Alert…emergency stations. What the heck’s going on? Delta evasion, that whole thing. Secondary hull…put up the shields. That’s when they get a corner on this other ship. I’ll call my boss. Frequencies…Gul Macet…I remember back when this was on Amazon; the picture of Gul Macet in the cockpit was the picture…I was like, I’ll never watch that episode ‘cause Gul Macet has some sort of helmet on and is very bird-like. I said, I don’t think I could watch that episode. I don’t want to see a bird with a helmet on. But it’s not like that in…I mean, when you watch the episode. Goes dude, we’re at peace. Why are you firing on us? Let me call…such a contest, you’ll be at a disadvantage. One hour. Then the episode opens, then we go back to the face-off.

 

That’s when they talk about Maxwell…Ben Maxwell? He was a fine…one of the finest captains back in the day. Must have had a provocation. Wish I knew. He’s going on Silent Running. Doesn’t even answer our communiques. Still in Cassidy…Cardassian space, probably. Go and find him, Picard. Come on, man, get on it. Do you think the Cardassians are gonna cooperate? Yeah, they’re gonna be onboard with you. Picard grimaces at that. Observers to show good faith. Protect the peace, Jean-Luc. We’re not prepared. So, don’t…no matter the cost. Haden out. He leans back in his chair. Picard takes a breath through his nose. We have another showdown. They beam aboard. Oh, Science II was what was over Picard’s shoulder. That’s what was I trying…why I said Science II…oh, it’s the science station.

 

They’re all leaning on it, having a meeting. On the Bridge…do we really have to have them onboard? Worf wants to watch everything they do. They’re our guests, Worf. Can I lock some places at least? Maybe. So, this kinda shows they’re feeling…they’re…the staff has feelings about it. Data, anybody that worked with Maxwell? Yeah. Oh yeah, I have the whole…I’ve got everything. Chief O’Brien…O’Brien? Well, he’s a wild card, man. Everybody exchanges looks on O’Brien. Okay, well, I gotta call…tell O’Brien to know I’m gonna call him. Then they transport on. They’re in some sort of padded outfits…platform shoes. I’m Riker. This is Counselor Troi. I’m Gul Macet. This is Glin Daro and Glin Telle. So, that’s their thing, Gul or Glin is how you are. Shall we? Okay.

 

Then O’Brien’s kinda staring…staring after them. Troi catches it. She goes, you know I’m an empath, man, even when the empathic feelings aren’t always great. Then we get a supplemental Captain’s Log. In Cardassian territory, looking for the Phoenix. That’s when they have a meeting…everybody…they say, you don’t even…do you have any idea what this guy is up to? You don’t even know where he is. We know his last-known coordinates. That’s a pretty good place to start. Well, we’re skeptical about this whole thing. Do you expect us to believe that you’re really tracking him down? Yeah, we are, man. Of course you’re concerned. That’s why you’re here. We’re having a meeting. This is open. No secrets. You’re hearing reports…Riker’s very proud of Picard as he does this. He smiles. Very well.

 

Then they go to O’Brien who’s been sitting silently at the other end. What’s up? O’Brien, you got any insights? Maxwell has been through some stuff, and that…all that…that Beastie Boys album. Yeah, but he always kept repressed…good old…that’s what we called him. He taught me how to repress things, actually. Then they all get up to go. This is when O’Brien loses it on the two. He’s just more passive-aggressive. I don’t…I’m not talking about nothing unless I’m told to. I’m being a little hard on O’Brien; I realize that, so I apologize, O’Brien. But yeah, I have to get permission from Commander LaForge to talk to you about transporters. In my spare time, I choose not to hang with Cardassians, which later we realize is because…just reminds him of bad choices he made.

 

Or, not bad choices, but choices that left…choices that were too…very intense for O’Brien. So, actually, O’Brien has a little Band-Aid too, on the inside. What do we got here? Picard, Worf, Data, they’re our guests. Just seeing what other notes I have of what dialogue I want to talk about. Okay, yeah, captain, you got a suggestion? We have ships…oh, they say what if we find him? Give us your…give us his coordinates. We’ll totally track him down. We could meet up with him first. Picard goes, nah. I’m sure that’s true but given the circumstances, I better make contact. I’m sure you would want to do that if the situation was reversed. They say, time’s crucial, man. This guy’s…Maxwell’s…they used to say ‘off the chain’, I think. You say…we gotta stop him. Picard says, only one incident so far.

 

If I can reach him first, then diplomacy can prevail. But we don’t want to escalate things, which is true. Could lose control. So, you won't give us his precise location? Nope. Moving on. Then we see the Enterprise going from left to right. Oh, O’Brien busts out a potato casserole. Kako smells it. Then he’s singing the minstrel boy is gone. Sorry, I didn’t mean to sing there. He’s humming. What are you singing, hon? Oh, it’s my casserole song, an old song…an ode to a casserole. We used to sing it on the Rutledge. Hadn’t thought of it ‘til I thought about…goes oh, it’s about glory. You know, glory of…casserole and glory; those two things go together. The minstrel boy makes casserole and in the bowl, you’ll find it. His casserole is girded on and his wild harp slung behind him. He goes oh, Captain Maxwell loved that.

 

Loved when we sang about casserole, even more than the Beastie Boys. He wished they had a casserole song. He goes, man…he goes, we had this meeting this morning…and he goes, there’s…then he starts talking in third-party. There’s people that don’t like the Cardassians, hon. You know that…believe that? She goes well, it has been a tough time. What are these? Capers. Goes yeah, but the war is over now. Why can’t everybody get over it? He’s saying…but really he’s talking about himself, you know. She goes well, have you gotten over it? Well, how do you feel about the Cardassians? Me? Well, I feel fine. Just like Captain Maxwell told me. But she gives a knowing nod. Then he grimaces. I didn’t notice that before. Then we have the…we’re watching their live mapping.

 

Cardassian supply ship…they say, how do you know all this? They say yeah, we got secret stuff onboard, dude. You can read our transponders? He goes, listen, let’s just…let’s get ahold of Maxwell here. He’s not answering our calls. Well, put out a repeating message. Gul Macet, we’re doing everything we can and getting nothing done, sorry to say. He goes, show me the location of the other ships. Of course, there’s a bunch of ships right by the Phoenix that could intercept before trouble. Just give us the frequencies, man. Are you gonna stand there and do nothing? Picard’s stuck…looks back. He thinks…sighs. He goes…looks at Riker and he goes, Mr. Worf, have there been any responses to our calls? No. Data’s listening, too. Riker’s listening. Okay, well…he goes, Mr. Worf…hm. Long silence. Long thinking face.

 

He goes, send the codes to the Phoenix…or the Cardassians, then. He goes, sir, they’re gonna shut the shields off, then. He goes, I gotta stop Maxwell. Worf is not happy. He goes, Mr. Worf, now. Worf…yes, Captain. Starts to send the codes out, but this, I guess, is in some sense, escalation. We get a long look on Picard’s face, then we go to commercial. We come back, and this is when they see the action. It doesn’t work out for the Cardassians. But I guess that was…they shouldn’t have sent the Cardassian warship, I guess. So, in some sense, it very barely…I don’t know. Still doesn’t make it okay, but it’s just like, oh, that was a mistake. Then sixteen hours and forty-four minutes away. Hop it to Warp 9. Wait, what warp were they on before? Sorry. Current speed of Warp 4. Yeah, they went from Warp 4 to Warp 9.

 

I don’t know the…but that’s gonna be faster, for sure. The dude goes, why weren’t we going Warp 9 the whole time? Picard goes, ‘cause it’s not…this has gotta…we’re using more lithium crystals or whatever. Picard goes to deal with O’Brien. Yo, this is not going good, O’Brien. Well, how can I help? Well, he’s the best, man. He loved singing. Loved when this kid would sing to us about casseroles. He loves keeping his feelings to himself. That’s what he said. Sing about casseroles or the Beastie Boys, but don’t have…keep it to your…otherwise feelings aren’t part of the Starfleet code that I know of. Even Picard says, do you like the Cardassians? O’Brien says just fine, but I gotta watch my back. Picard goes, we just…he’s…this guy, Maxwell, there’s no reason for what he’s doing.

 

He’s been keeping things to himself for too long and got used to his deep-down feelings that he kept inside that weren’t even totally…it should have been expressed a long time ago, maybe in a song about casseroles. But O’Brien…he’s also talking to O’Brien about getting over his feelings. I guess it does relate to O’Brien who expresses his feelings later, right in the next scene, so that worked out. I guess what’s also interesting about the Cardassians is they spend a lot of time in Ten Forward, meaning if we were talking about…that they do want to socialize with humans and Starfleet officers. So, that’s interesting to me. But yeah, there’s lots of stress. Okay, so we have them…Kanar…sure. Kanar, Kano, Kayes. Takes a bit of getting used to.

 

O’Brien says yeah, by the way, I wanted to say I’m sorry for blowing my top. I shouldn’t have popped off like that, he says in the turbo lift. The Cardassian says well, it’s been a tough time. This isn’t easy. I want to be back on my ship, too. O’Brien says yeah, I didn’t even think about you. I was thinking about me. But that’s interesting. Anyway, back to me. He goes, yeah…he goes, there was a lot going on back then and I think we can agree that it was very intense. O’Brien says, so I wanted to express my feelings about it. Maybe we can move on and move forward even though I have strong feelings about it, ‘cause I was almost living a Buddhist life before that. Wouldn’t even take out a mosquito. Then they have the other Cardassian who was looking up codes or whatever. Computer station on Deck 35, weapon systems.

 

It’s a lie, dude. I wasn’t; I was interfacing with terminals to see what their keyboard layout was. Don’t know what I was looking at. They say, come on, man. Why are you going on their computer, period? But I meant nothing. I just had some idle time. No harm. Go to your room and stay there for the rest of the expedition. The guy says as you wish, I guess. They say Worf, why don’t you accompany this guy? Gladly, Captain. So, they head to the turbo lift. That’s when they say, let’s have a private conversation between two captains. So, they go to the Ready Room. Door closes. Sorry about that. If you want to discipline him or something…Picard goes, it’s your business. I’ve moved on. He goes, you can do whatever you want to discipline him. The matter’s closed for me.

 

Goes well, I wouldn’t be so generous as you…in your place, Captain. Picard goes yeah, thanks. If there’s to be a lasting peace, Gul Macet, neither you or I must allow any one man to undermine our efforts or anyone…any one officer to undermine our efforts. Then they say, yeah. This is like…turns out that none of this is real. The guy’s acting, I think, for Picard ‘cause he says yeah, we want peace. But Picard goes, really? In the end, do you really? We’ll be watching. Okay, now we got…they caught up with the guy. He just goes onboard, shakes Riker’s hand after he looked behind him. Fine work you’ve done, Riker. We all owe you one. Points at…O’Brien? Miles O’Brien? Hello, Captain. Double handshake. No idea you were on the Enterprise.

 

Tactical officer on the Rutledge; I don’t know if that’s a promotion or a demotion, to be honest, or just a…goes, you could size up things instantly with options to all contingencies. Remarkable. Well, I learned it from you, sir. You got that silver tongue, too, from kissing the stone. Say, what? Then he goes yeah, I better see your captain right away. We got a lot to talk about. Riker goes, no duh, man. But he grins and winks at O’Brien. Then Riker glares at O’Brien. O’Brien looks…makes a little kid face. Kinda has a little bit too much pomp when he walks into the office. Captain Ben Maxwell. So, they’ve never met before. Says, a pleasure. Please sit down. Maxwell slow sits down. He goes yeah, you must think I’ve gone off the rails. Picard goes, yeah.

 

Goes yeah, I gotta tell you, man, I’m glad you came to get me ‘cause you know how it is with these bureaucrats, eh? Picard goes, what? Nothing out here could possibly justify your behavior. Goes oh, well, list…let me lay this on you, man. Cardassians are trouble. They’re up to trouble. Science station, my rear end. Picard goes, you got some proof? Oh, I’ve heard around town. From who? Where’s your documentation? He goes, I know what I know. That’s when he stands up. I say, this guy, he may have…he goes, come on, Picard. You know what I’m saying is true. This is a jumping-off point. It’s trouble. Points at Picard, even. Nobody’s gonna tell me it’s scientific research. Picard goes, but you should have just told Starfleet. He goes, wait…yeah, he goes wait six months for the bureaucrats? Pulls his jacket down.

 

He goes, they don’t get it. They’re not like you and me out here on the ships. You must get it, Picard. Picard goes, you weren’t even in trouble. He goes yeah, there was trouble. He goes, lives. Whose lives? We had to act. Why? Picard says. Great exchange. Then O’Brien just…he’s very…or, not O’Brien; whatever this guy’s…Ben Maxwell. Picard goes dude, you have really messed things up, taken us to the brink. He goes oh, no, I’m preventing all that. I’m a hero, man. Goes, that peace treaty was a ruse. Picard goes, so you all alone decided to get rid of the treaty? He goes, yep. Took the initiative. Did what had to be done. Picard goes, what had to be done? For whom? Why would a man with a long service record abandon the fundamental principles I thought that he believed in or even fought for for his whole life?

 

Picard goes well, I believe you’re not well, man. The guy shakes his head. Oh, no, no. Two fingers up…Picard goes, you’re on a personal mission for you, your casserole songs. That’s when he says you’re a fool, Picard. Goes, history will look at you and say this man was a fool. Picard goes, I’ll take the judgment of history. I’m not worried about it. He goes, I’ll be vindicated by history. Picard goes, you’re irrelevant. Irrelevant? He goes, come with me. Let’s do an inspection. You’ll see how irrelevant I am. Picard goes, we’re not chasing Cardassian ships. We’re taking you in…Starbase 211, and that’s it. Then we’re gonna return to Federation space together. Goes, those are Starfleet orders. Picard’s grimacing now. I’ll permit you the dignity to go on your own ship ‘til you’re done. He goes, or you could go in disgrace.

 

The guys swallows and says, I’ll return to my ship. Picard goes, you’re under…you understand the orders? Yes, Captain. Then calls Worf…take the guest off-board. Picard doesn’t even wait for Maxwell to leave before he goes to the window. Then we realize Maxwell takes off. What’s he doing? No response. He tries to go after another ship. We haven’t identified it. He picks up pace. They chase after him. On-screen…so, they got…they’re chasing his ship. Right now they’re just watching. So they say, maybe he won't mess with that other Cardassian ship. He goes, but we’re…Data goes, there is a weird subspace field coming off that Cardassian ship. O’Brien’s on the Bridge. He goes, O’Brien, what do you think I should do about this, man? What do you think he’s gonna do?

 

O’Brien says…and then they say Maxwell’s calling in. Now Maxwell’s kinda really…he’s super…he goes, there’s proof to go inspect that ship that I cornered. He goes dude, you had a order. He goes, board that ship and see I’m correct. He goes, we’re not boarding anything, Maxwell. Get aboard the Enterprise now. He goes, if you don’t board that ship, I’m gonna shoot some lasers. Picard goes come on, man, I won't allow you to do that. He goes…swallows. O’Brien goes, can’t make him feel like his back’s against the wall. They’re getting ready to do something. Picard goes, Red Alert. Ready…get ready. Picard…then O’Brien also has a…he goes, let me go over. They go well, you’re blocked out. He goes no, no, there’s a cycle thing. I can sneak in through the cycling shields. That’s where we see O’Brien’s intelligence.

 

It’s a high-energy sensor system. 5.5-minute cycles. There’s a brief window, fiftieth of a second. I’ll get through that. Make it so. O’Brien heads off. Next thing you know, O’Brien shows up at the dude’s office. I mean, everybody onboard must have been like, what are we doing? He even…O’Brien’s like dude, I’m not here to…I’m here to talk and sing about casseroles. How’d you get over here? Come on, man. How do you think I got over here? We gotta talk our way out of this. He goes, talk to Picard. Have him look on that ship. O’Brien says, he’s not gonna do that. He goes, but they’re the enemies. He goes, count on it, man. He goes, what happened? O’Brien says listen, man, there is no enemy. We have a peace treaty. There is…the war’s over. He turns; he goes, no, you’re wrong, O’Brien.

 

The Cardassians…and O’Brien goes, that’s what everybody thinks when they call someone the enemy. Maybe that’s what they thought about us. He goes well, we don’t start wars. Then he starts going back into the past, Maxwell. O’Brien’s just silent. Maxwell’s like, I can’t get over it. I can’t get over it, O’Brien. O’Brien does a lot of blinking. He goes, we were together. You know what I went through. He goes, but you were joking and laughing about it and keeping it repressed. He goes, remember that guy that sang about casseroles? Casserole and Cardassian is almost the same. He goes yep, that’s Stampy. Good old Stampy or Stompy. Loudest walker on our ship. O’Brien sits down on the arm of a chair. He goes oh, yeah. Then they sit next to each other. What was that song you used to sing about casseroles? I love that song.

 

He would sing…you would sing it to him, he would sing it to you, he would sing it for me. Then O’Brien says casserole, it’s at dinnertime, and it’s almost getting ready. Then he’s trying to remember the song, the other guy. Then he starts singing, both casseroles have girded on and a harp plays when they’re ready. Scoots is using ready a lot, but…casserole, don’t…make sure it’s done. Through all the world, it is good for us. Make sure you add…what are those things called? Capers, ‘cause it’ll make it extra-tasty. They’re singing side-by-side. Oh, casserole, we shall praise thee. They pause on that. It’s a pretty long freeze. I mean, not freeze, but there’s motion. Probably five seconds. Now we’re at eight or nine seconds. Wow, the power of quiet. Then he goes, I’m in big trouble, aren’t I? O’Brien goes, oh yeah.

 

You’re…yeah, you might as well…there’s nothing you could do now. Might as well…let’s get this over with. Then we go back. Captain’s…Maxwell’s letting his first officer fly. He’s on…confined to his quarters on our ship. Thanks, O’Brien. He goes, you know, Captain Maxwell’s a good man. Made some terrible choices. I know that now. But I was still happy to be on the ship with him. Then he goes…Picard says that’ll be all. Then Gul Macet says well, he’s loyal, that Riker…or that, whatever, O’Brien. Misplaced. Picard goes, the loyalty you would dismiss does not come easily for us, Gul Macet. You got a lot to learn about us. Ben Maxwell earned that loyalty. He goes, he earned two big honors, the highest citations in Federation history; courage and valor. But he couldn’t find a role for them in peace…himself.

 

We can pity him but we shall not dismiss him. He goes, you can…you’re welcome to your opinion, Captain Picard, but I don’t agree. So, I’m glad. Then Gul Macet goes to leave. He goes, one more thing; don’t think I didn’t notice about that high-energy field around the ship. You wouldn’t do that for scientific equipment. He goes, so, we’ll be watching. Then he goes, well, why didn’t you check the ship? He goes, ‘cause I’m here to preserve the peace. So, we’ll keep our eye on you. He goes, okay, but why didn’t you board it? Picard just…yeah. He says I was protecting the peace, man, and I believe…firmly believe in the interest of both our people’s peace. If I boarded that ship, it would have been trouble. He goes, now we’re having a pleasant conversation about me keeping my eye on you. He goes, I assure you…he goes, no, no, tell your leaders I’m well aware. They exchange looks. Oh, Picard glares. Wow. Then he turns away. Okay, this is powerful, man. Turns his back on the guy after glaring at him. That’s how the episode ends. Classic. Goodnight, everybody.

 

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcribed by Leah Hervoly)