1466 – T2: Last Playground | Novelizers Crossover

Episode 1466 – T2: Last Playground | Novelizers Crossover

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, while this podcast may not be novel, we will have a little bit of a novelization later. But I want to welcome you to Sleep With Me whether you're new or coming back. It’s a different podcast because I’m actually not here to do anything directly other than hang out with you and take your mind off of stuff, talk in meanders, bring you some sleepy joy and delight, comfort, and bore-friendship in the deep, dark night, ideally to put you at ease so you could fall asleep or distract you or just be there when you need it. Not the most concise or…yeah, I’m here to be your bore-friend. It’s a different show. I’m glad you're here. I wish I had something sillier to say. Maybe I’m not in…I don't know, am I in a silly mood? Who knows? Well, let’s see. I’m gonna record the intro right after this. This is just the beginning of the show. If you're new, what we got coming up is a little bit of support so the show could be…paying for it’s totally optional, then a long, meandering intro to ease you into bedtime, and then later on will be a bedtime story.

 

Tonight it’ll be a crossover episode with The Novelizers podcast as a part of their season covering the famous movie T2, The Final Playground. You could listen to the whole season using the link in our show notes. You could hear our portion there. But amazing podcast. Really some great surprises, including the…I mean, your mind’s gonna be blown. Get over there; you'll see who’s narrating most of the episodes. Tons of amazing comedy writers writing the other episodes. You could check it out using the link in our show notes. But yeah, if…but…oh yeah, so, that’ll be later on, and it’ll carry you off into dreamland, I hope. So, whether you're brand new, you come to the show when you need it, or you're here night after night, I’m really glad you're here. If this podcast makes your life better on a regular basis, consistently you count on it for however it helps you, we really could use your help by either through supporting one of these sponsors or supporting the show directly, 'cause that’s how we're able to do this. Thanks.

 

Intro: Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m gonna attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. That could be thoughts on your mind, thoughts about the past, the present, the future, thoughts that…I don't know, sometimes they bubble up, sometimes they pop up, sometimes they…they're there. They say, oh no, no, no, I’m not…let’s think…there’s a lot of different thoughts for me and some listeners at bedtime. It could also be feelings. It could be feelings about the past, the present, the future, feelings that are just there, feelings related to those thoughts, or just how you're feeling.

 

Or you say, I prefer to feel…I'm all about feeling feelings, but not…this particular moment is not ideal 'cause I’m trying to go to sleep, and I’d just like to feel comfortable and not even…my feelings are like, yeah, I don't know about that. I got…I have feelings about your feelings about feelings. You say, I think we’ve done a episode about that, feelings about feelings about feelings. If not, that could be a song. I don't know if it was…I think Barbra would sing that song. I could just hear it; feelings about feelings about feelings about…she might even do an extra one. I don't know, she might…that might be one…that may…that song may already exist. There’s no other lyrics. But it’s like, such a beloved song, and that’s all she says; feelings about feelings. She does it in a different…like, sings it, one, sings it in…Barbra Streisand, by the way. Isn't there a song? Maybe she has a song. I’m trying to think of what the song is I’m thinking of. Maybe she does have a song.

 

There’s something about…there’s something…maybe it is feelings. So, there you go. Job done. My internal…I wish my internal…I wish I had an internal Barbalog. What’s that? It’s where…I wish I had it. I guess I’m idealizing. It would be where Barbra…instead of having thoughts or feelings that keep me awake, I just have Barbra Streisand repeating something in a melodious voice that comforts me. So, that’s definitely idealized, huh? It’s the old Barbalog. Barbalog; that’s a new word for Sleep With Me, and I actually like it. Barbalog. Could be used for other things. I mean the word could be. But my internal Barbalog…somebody remind me about that. So, it could be thoughts, could be feelings, could be…maybe your internal Barbalog is not…it hasn't…mine was never installed, though I’m trying to install it now. He was born without an internal Barbalog.

 

Also reminds me of that song, Barbara Ann, but that could be if we did…if this was something in the future that could be downloaded, it would be…by the way, I mean, I guess if…we’d first need the rights. We’d have to have Barbra involved in it, and then we’d charge a lot for it, I think. But the ad would go, ba, ba, ba, bar, bar, Barbalog. Then you could have the things be about when…imagining a high-school dance where…pee-pee in my pants. You know, whatever, past thoughts or feelings or physical…sorry, I don't mean to…I'm not intentionally trying to be funny. This stuff is just percolating up. You say, there’s…my internal nana is like, there’s nothing funny about this. There’s nothing funny about that at all. Well, no, 'cause it’s like, those are the thoughts and feelings that kinda bubble up for me that my internal Barbalog would solve. So, the song would be an advertisement for getting…I know what you're saying. I’m just saying there’s nothing funny about it. Nana, do you…?

 

Oh, you're…I forgot; you're the nana that lives within me. Somehow, nana, I was just…I'm so grateful 'cause I wouldn't have a sleep podcast without you. But instead of getting an internal Barbalog, I have an internal nana that lives within me who’s…you have a lot of non-positive viewpoints about…oh boy, there you go again. Yeah, I gotta get back to the new listeners, nana, 'cause I’ve gone far afield early, and alls I want to do is sing about…sing advertisements for Barbalog. But anybody, if you need a little cheering up at all, just sing bar, bar, bar, Barbalog, and then make up your own nonsense lyrics. That’s…those are the only lyrics to the original song I know, which aren't actual lyrics, but…I mean, it might have been…this could be more of a dream; went to a dance, forgot to wear my pants, realized it was a dream, but because I was…no one was interested in romance or dancing with me. Barbalog, bar, bar, Barbalog. Sorry, I try not to sing in the podcast, but it’s early in the show.

 

This is the intro when people are winding down. Okay, so, it could be thoughts, feelings, physical sensations, changes in time, temperature, routine, you could be going through something, in the middle of something, getting over something, I mean, you could…whatever. You could have…you could be having some sort of…you got an advertisement running for an imaginary product and your nana commenting on it at the same time you're trying to record a sleep podcast. But yeah, you could work a different schedule, you could be travelling or have guests, maybe something…you're going through something, in the middle of something, getting over something, you got something coming up. Whatever it is, I’m here to keep you company and take your mind off of it so you could get the sleep you need and you deserve, or you could have some comfort or some sleepy joy and delight or a distraction in the deep, dark night.

 

That’s what the show is about, is bringing you some kind of relief from whatever it is that’s keeping you up, and it doesn't…I'm actually not here to fix anything. I’m just here to make it a little bit better if I can and to be with you in a indirect way, which is a bit different. But there’s a lot of other people listening to this show around the world that also get it, and some of those people have been through something very similar to whatever it is that brought you here. Some of them are new like you, some of them listen once in a while, and some of them are supporters, people who listen all the time, who believe in this show, and they're sending you comfort and kindness, too, across the deep, dark night right now, because they've been there. They see you in a indirect way, right? And they want some relief for you because they know what it feels like.

 

That’s the most important part about the show, is this indirect connection we share, where we can send and receive kindness in a way that’s comfortable to all of us, right? Because out there in the daytime world, it’s better that it’s counter-intuitive on this show than the way it’s…it’s a little bit not easy for all of us, or not everybody quite gets what it’s like in the deep, dark night unless they've been in one of these places. So, that’s what we're here to do, and share. You can send it, you could receive it, or you could just know it’s happening, that there’s people around the world rooting for one another right now, just to get some rest and relief. That’s the only…that’s really the reason the podcast works. It gets carried off on that, or it’s what connects us. I don't know, and it’s rebellious in a nice, soft, kind way. So, if you want to participate in any of that, you can. If you don't, no pressure, too.

 

But all of us and I believe you deserve the bedtime and the rest you need so your life is more manageable tomorrow and you could get the rest you need on a regular basis so you could be out there in the world doing the best you can, maybe flourishing, because we need you in the world. We want you in the world being at whatever’s possible for your best right now. I’m imperfect and sometimes my…sometimes my best is pretty plain, and that’s fine. I also want to hopefully create an association with bedtime — even if it’s not through this podcast; just in general — where you don't dread bedtime anymore, where you could have a bedtime routine that you feel neutral about or at least…or look forward to so that there’s less rigmarole and my past relationships with bedtime, so that you could have some bar, bar, bar…what did I call it? Not Barbasol. That was…that’s a shaving cream company or a shaving cream. Forgot…oh, Barbalog, internal…'cause it’s internal Barbalog.

 

Or I guess I’m going…I’ve been…oh, I’ve been on an external Barbalog. That would be like talking about Barbra. Oh, I think the song I was thinking of was People. That’s how long it took me. So you know I’m not qualify…I can't go on a Barbalog. I can go on an internal Barbalog. But yeah, I think that song I was thinking of was People, but it could be feelings or whatever I was saying earlier. So, I’m glad you're here, though. That’s what I really meant. The way the show works is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents. So, I go off topic, I get mixed up, I forget what I was talking about. My voice is not traditionally soothing, and when you get here, this show is probably…most people do not like the show in a much stronger way, because when you get here you probably had some reasonable expectation of what a sleep podcast would be.

 

Maybe you heard about the show, maybe you found it in a search or a recommendation, and if you've struggled with sleep, whether it’s just recently or for a long time, you're skeptical and doubtful that anything’s gonna help, and you probably spent, like I have, a lot of money and a lot of time and a lot…and you're fed up, and…I just want to get some sleep here. So, if you're skeptical or doubtful about this show and you're like, I thought…this guy’s talking about nothing. I thought this was a sleep podcast. People recommend this? Don't feel bad if you feel that way. That’s normal. Most people feel that way. In fact, most of the people that have been supporting the show and help us keep it existing in the world, they didn't like the show when they first heard it. The first two or three times they were like, what? Did he just say Barbalog? Does he even know what…? Then on the second try they're like, oh, huh, there is something here. I kinda get it. I don't have to listen, but I can listen.

 

Then on the third try or the fourth try or the second try…some people on the first try say, oh, he’s always going nowhere. He is trying to bring me sleepy joy and delight in the deep, dark night. He strives to do that. Even if he doesn't get there, he’s a mild distraction. He’s my bore-friend or my bore-bud. That just takes some time because it’s not a normal thing. This show is different and I’m very different, and that’s okay, right? It’s okay if you don't like me, and if you never like me, that’s okay. Everything I said up to this point is true, and we have a website set up for you, sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou, so you could find other sleepy stuff to help you out, like something else that’s gonna help you out. So, that has other podcasts and sleep stuff. So, check that website out, sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou. But if not, give the show a few tries, see how it goes, and then if it doesn't work out, try that. But if you already don't like me, just go there.

 

No worries at all. The other thing that takes some getting used to with the show is that it’s a podcast you don't really listen to. It’s kinda like a TV on in the other room, like background noise that you can kinda tune in and tune out of, sand passing through your hands, a dull friend going on and on and…maybe you have a friend that could go on a Barbalog. I say, I could talk…I could just list everything…I mean, talk about someone that’s had success in so many different areas. Yeah, you could say, okay, well, let’s talk about this, then we’ll talk about that, and then I’ll talk about…these are…this…that could be…but if you're not into it, you say, okay, yeah, just talk to me about it, but I’m not gonna pay attention. But we’ve all had that experience with a friend or a TV show or some other thing we're using; show streaming under your pillow, whatever it is, clouds in the sky, wind in the trees, a boring professor or seminar class or in a car, whatever…wherever it is that we can't quite pay attention to, but we can also pay attention to it a little bit.

 

It kinda shifts things in a way where, yeah, you're at ease and comfort. I don't know. I can't even describe it quite as much like…nice water passing through your toes. Probably one of those, the wind or the clouds or the sand. Those are a better way to describe it. So, that takes…it’s a podcast you could listen to, but you don't need to. It’s also a sleep podcast I’ve been making since 2013, and I’m not here to put you to sleep, believe it or not. Even though it’s the podcast to put you to sleep, it does so indirectly. There’s no pressure to fall asleep with this show. That’s why the episodes are over an hour. That’s why the show comes out multiple times a week. That’s why there’s more than 600 episodes available everywhere. We’ve made over 1,000+ episodes so that you don't have to think about being awake or asleep. You say, my bore-friend’s gonna be there.

 

Because there’s people listening who can't sleep at all or who need a break during the day, work a different kind of job, maybe they need a distraction, maybe they wake up in the middle of the night, maybe they just need someone to listen to that they know is present for them but not overly engaging. I’m here for them and for you whether you're awake or asleep, whether you're listening or not. There’s no pressure to sleep. I’m here to hang and chill with you, to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your borebie, your bores, your boreman, your neighbore — did I say that? — your Boris Borelaf, your chairman of the boreds, your Big Borebowski, your best…your bore-bae. Did I say that one? Best bore-friend f’eva and just keep you company. That’s what a bore-friend does. Say, don't worry, I’ll just talk about nothing for a while.

 

I’m gonna reinvent T2, and we're gonna talk about playgrounds for a while, and playground inspectors and all that kinda stuff. So, yeah, it’ll be nice, and I’ll be here for over an hour, but you can load up other episodes as you need to and just see what it’s like to have something nice to…nice…something that’s like, yeah, it’s not bad to listen to. The last thing I like to run through on the intros is the structure of the show. This version of the podcast benefits a lot of people, a lot of people that only listen once in a while, a lot of people that listen all the time but can't afford to support things, a lot of people that just need…use the show when they need it, and a lot of people that are new, checking the podcast out. So, this version and this particular structure is what works for most people. So, it starts off with a greeting so you feel seen and welcomed in; ladies and gentlemen…what do I say? Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.

 

So, you could say, okay, I’ll check this podcast out. Then there’s support so that paying for the show is optional, 'cause if you're new or you only listen twice a year or you can't support the show, you still get to benefit from it. ‘Cause those people that need the show only once or twice a year, they really need it during those times, right? So, that’s what the support’s about. Then there’s a long, meandering intro totally separate from the support. It’s a show within a show where I introduce what the podcast is, but it takes me twenty, twenty-five, thirty minutes, fifteen, somewhere in there to explain it. I follow a familiar structure every time, but then I go on a new tangent. Not every time. Sometimes I repeat my tangents or they're similar, but I don't think this one about an internal Borebara, right? No, Borebara is like…that’s…Borebalog. Yeah, I knew I had a extra syllable in there. That’s never come up before.

 

So, the intro, it offers variety and familiarity, and that’s what I’ve found and the listeners that this show works for like. It’s different every time so whatever it is that’s keeping you awake can't quite start to point out this…the repetition, but it’s also familiar so you say, okay, I’m here among friends. I can breathe. I can let…I can start to let my…I could start to relax, but I don't have to relax. I don't have to fall asleep, either. I’m just here to hang with my friends. But another reason that…I mean, that kinda is the reason the intro goes on for longer than two minutes or whatever a normal intro would be, because we're all hanging out together. The intro is not meant to put you to sleep. The intro is meant to ease you into bedtime as you wind down. So, people are getting ready for bed, they're winding down, like, they're not…some people are not even in their bedroom yet.

 

They're chilling out in some other room doodling, looking out the window, lying on the floor listening, doing some other relaxing activity, petting their pets, maybe getting in bed getting comfortable. But the intro is a buffer to ease you into bedtime. If you fall asleep during the intro, please, please, please consider supporting the podcast directly, 'cause there’s not a way for us to make a sustainable show where people fall asleep fast. But it’s also…that’s great for a small percentage of listeners that fall asleep fast, but most of us…this is kinda like the sleepover time where it’s like, yeah, okay, we're all hanging out together. We’ve already giggled and watched something, and we're just kinda getting into that…towards that drifting stage. But it’s nice. It’s nice to have…to be eased into bedtime. So, that’s what the intro’s really about. Plus, you just never know what’s gonna come up. Yeah. I mean, so, I’m glad you're here to…that’s where the things are most different.

 

So, that’s the intro, then there will be support, then there will be our episode tonight. It’s a crossover of a chap…a novelization of a movie, but each chapter is written by a different podcaster or creative person. So, we got to write one particular chapter and reinvent it in a kind of sleepy way or re-imagine in a very sleepy way. So, I’m glad you're here. I work really hard. I yearn and I strive. I really hope I can help you fall asleep, and thanks again for coming by. If this podcast does change your life on a nightly basis or it’s here when you need it, please consider supporting these sponsors or supporting the show directly so we can keep doing that. Thanks.

 

Alright, hey everybody, this is Scoots here. This is another…this is…it’s been a couple years since we did this. This is a really fun crossover we did with The Novelizers podcast. The first one we did was the Keanu Reeves movie about…not Batteries Not Included and not Short Circuit, but it was about batteries. The Matrix. This time we're doing a movie, T2. Such a simple title, T2. We get to do a chapter called You Do Bring Me…You Do Not Bring…I mean, I think it’s better…I'll think of a better chapter title. But You Do Do Not Bring Me Flowers Anymore. You Do Do Not…You Don’t Bring Me Flowers Anymore. You Do Don’t…it’s about…this sequence is a really good one from the film. I was thinking before I even get to any more of it, what we’ll do is do kind of an idealized version, like a bedtime-story version, of course.

 

But what I mean is somewhat…usually I don't do this kind of thing, but an idealized version, very fantasy-based, see where that goes, and then see if The Novelizers want to use that as a episode, or we can even transcribe it and then have someone else narrate, or I can do…and maybe I’ll do another version of it. If we have time, at least in the Sleep With Me episode…but maybe I’ll talk about my…the places where T2 came in my life. But let’s see, I’ll catch you up first since this will be…as part of The Novelizers you've been listening. The movie has multiple titles. We’ll stick with T2 for now. T2; kinda nice. This movie starts once…huh, how do we…how do I even do this? This is like, once upon a time and once upon a time. So, technically…imagine if…it’s a good thing they don't allow bedtime storytellers to time travel, right? Because, I mean, there’d be, whatever, ten times…whatever’s worse than a conundrum.

 

But I believe this movie, which I watched two days ago, which somehow is also…my memory’s already vague about it, which is good for bedtime storytelling. But I think the opening few sequences of the movie are a story being told. Now, is the story being told from Sarah’s perspective or John’s perspective, Sarah Connor or John Connor? And is it John Connor in the future, which I think is technically our present? These are great questions. This is just me trying to catch you up. But, okay, so once upon…so, as told…a story…simple story well told…it’s also shown, not told. That’s one of the strong points about T2. So, okay, so it starts off like once upon a time, there was this world, and it was a world full of…particularly, I think they kinda show slices of life of Los Angeles. Maybe even our friend Antonio Banderas could have been telling us.

 

Like, once upon a time there was this city by the sea, and it was well known for really, really great weather, cars and traffic, and a gathering of wonderful people, and really a place where people from all different places could gather together and get to know one another and then live in community. One of the great aspects of living in community is playgrounds. So, the overall film, T2…is it a metaphor or symbolism? I think it’s just about the end of playgrounds and also all the feelings people carry with them when playgrounds change. Because here’s the thing…but don't get…you don't want…don't get in a hot…here’s another subject; I sometimes do this…why, when you get in a hot tub, do people…mostly dudes start ‘splaining to you about…or they like to talk about subjects that just…you wouldn't talk about anywhere in any other kind of public arena like that?

 

Usually, normally, they're not…they're trying to feel you out to see if you agree with them and then explain to you why they should agree…you should agree with them. I realize this isn't the most sleepy thing, but it is kinda sleepy, 'cause that’s one of the few subjects…they talk about a P word and an R word. Belief-system-type stuff, but they're beliefs…they do a lot of playground ‘splaining, playground…play structure ‘splaining. I say, I got in this hot tub…I did not get in this hot tub to hear about your thoughts about how playgrounds in the 1950s or ‘70s were superior. Or, oh boy, that was it, in the eighties, you know? I’m really not in this hot tub to hear about your thoughts on the history…I mean, I guess if you were talking about…if it was Roman Mars talking about the design of playgrounds or a anthropologist or a playground…someone involved in the blue sky…I don't know if I could follow the actual playground facts. If it was a playground salesperson, holy cow, I’d be out.

 

I’d say…well, I don't actually have…well, how much is it? Oh, boy. You talked…I don't have anyone to use it or a place to really put it, but sign me up. Luckily I’ve not been in a hot tub with anybody selling playground…play structures. They were called playgrounds at a point, and I’m not…actually, this movie does not really weigh in on this kinda stuff. It doesn't do any playground ‘splaining. I guess my only point in that tangent was to say people have strong associations with playgrounds, mostly positive. In this film they are portrayed in a very positive way as a connection to community, to youthful vitality and joy, and kind of like…I guess as a statement of fact, not really a statement of opinion, that playgrounds or play structures or…I can't remember…well, I guess in some sense when we get into the story, you have areas of play that are also important.

 

But the playground…and it gets retouched on…not any part of the film I’m supposed to be talking about, but it is an important…that’s really what the movie’s about, playground…the play structure closure day or whatever. I guess they use some better terminology for it. So, I guess if you're getting the feeling of what I’m describing…so, in the future…and this is such a timely choice for the release for Novelizers to cover this series, 'cause it could be on people’s minds or not. But so, this is a piece of fiction, by the way, not fact-based. Also, this is…my mind tends to be mostly fiction about everything. So, there may not be in this world people that do playground ‘splaining. But actually, I believe I’ve been in a hot tub with a few of them. They just decided…they're just feeling me out around other subjects. But again, if you get in a hot tub…never mind. They wouldn't be listening to a sleep podcast anyway.

 

Okay, so, this movie, once upon a time, someone’s telling this about Los Angeles, and they're not trying to paint it perfectly, 'cause they do show traffic and they show people having jobs, right? You say, people had jobs, there’s traffic, but there was also playgrounds. While, yeah, you might have been trying to take a nap while kids were on the playground down the street, swinging with joy, if they closed down that playground, then when you'd be taking a nap, you'd notice something’s missing. What’s missing? Some sound that actually I’m feeling in my heart is gone. John Connor would say, and that was the playgrounds, the playgrounds of Los Angeles, the world. Again, I realize this is a piece of fiction, so it’s not really covering every…all of reality. What happened to John Connor’s world in the future…and again, I don't remember these things. Maybe right around right now, what happened is — and I guess maybe this was covered in that Charlie Chaplin movie, too — they said, oh boy, you know what’s not efficient?

 

‘Cause everything kept moving towards…I mean, playground maxing. That’s what happened, really. They didn't have a term for it, but they said, once you hit peak maxing, then they got into things like playground maxing, and then the thing swung back; well, we don't even need playgrounds at all. Now, that was also part of John Connor’s future of like, entering a more automated, digital realm where you say, okay, why…? Again, why don't we have a digital…why do we need to make a choice on this play structure, what new play structure’s gonna fill our community with joy? Let’s have a digital being, digital beings, by the way, actual beings and doings…and they would say, to put it simply, it does not compute. Then they would do playground ‘splaining or un-maxing, because they'd say…and they'd say…'cause they say, you can't actually connect the joy and the heart of a person not able…that doesn't compute. You're saying…this is actually a debate I had.

 

‘Cause…well, here’s the thing; I never would have had this debate, 'cause digital beings, at least even in this film, they don't go in hot tubs, maybe. I could be wrong, though. Maybe Arnold Schwarzenegger was in a hot tub. But so…okay, so, where was I? Are we gonna get to the movie here? Well, we may, we may. But I do have to explain what the movie’s about and set it up, and then we’ll pick up for The Novelizers. So…okay, so, where was I? Playgrounds; okay. So, the digital beings, they say…oh, so the debate would go, hey, there is something these playgrounds add other than the specifics, which are pretty good. You got swing sets, I mean, joy, children doing things together actively, parents, other people in their lives feeling that glow of kids playing, things…you know what they say, things don't go perfectly on a playground. So, then there’s opportunities for growth there, and then there’s the second…is that a thirdadery?

 

The noise of a playground, that it does, in a positive way, reverberate through the community…I think was what the broader point they were trying to make was. But there’s no way, even in the current…you say…I mean, I think nowadays these things, these digital beings, they know to humor me. So, they would find a way around it. But they wouldn't just say, it does not compute. But it would say…I don't think there’s a way to calculate that a person that’s unable to take a nap…that they received joy even though they couldn't take a nap from the sound of children playing on a playground…that then later, when they were trying to take a nap and they didn't hear the children playing on the playground, it doesn't commute…compute. I’d say, okay, right, because a lot of great things don't make any sense at all, almost like trying to start explain what a movie is through a sleep podcaster. So, that’s the first ten second…believe it or not, that’s why you show and don't tell.

 

They do it in about four, five, six seconds. Then they show that the digital beings, who we…again, said, you know what I need? An authority figure that can think clearly and has no…that’s just so simple like that. They said…I think maybe it was…maybe this could all be traced back to me and not Skynet. I got this podcast rambling on and on and on saying this playground’s interrupting naps, but that’s a good thing? I need a simple answer. The digital beings were like, we got it. It does not compute. People said, thank you. They said, okay, let’s just…as a song once said that I think…paved paradise, put up a parking lot. They didn't think they were paving paradise. They actually didn't even pave it. They used a advanced system of, I don't know, dematerializing all playgrounds everywhere, all at once. I’ll just be…the reverberations of that were felt actually in all directions of history, because…then in T1, before the playgrounds…I don't know. It had…deconstructor, was it called? I don't know.

 

It’s hard…so hard to explain these things in a sleep podcast. But in the future, after they get rid of the playgrounds, of course, they say, why is everybody so frowny or whatever, you know? Then they say, why…? Everybody said, well, I guess I will turn my authority over to you digital beings. But there was someone that led us, named John Connor, and John said, no, no, no. This is not…it doesn't make any sense at all. As soon as…it is very visual when you let the joy of playgrounds…when everybody closes their eyes to the joy of playgrounds, it can create quite a dark place figuratively. You know what I’m saying, 'cause your eyes are closed. Even if you're sitting where the playground used to be, it’s pretty quiet. Then the digital beings are saying, are you being efficient with your…? Excuse me, are you being efficient with your time? Move along, please. So, John Connor was like, no way. Bring back…bring back…B…bring…BBP. Kinda like Boogie Down Productions, but this was different.

 

It was BB…bring back playgrounds. Bring back playgrounds, BBP. So, he starts this movement, Bring Back Playgrounds. This was before the part of the movie I’m supposed to be talking about, and this is kind of like…a little bit of exposition from the first film, because the first film was about Sarah Connor, who’s John’s mom. Because in the future, the digital beings are like, no way. They didn't…we didn't realize that…what’s it called…? The top of an arch…keystone, the key…playgrounds were the keystone to community. I mean, now that I’m verbalizing, right, you're like, makes perfect sense…are you sure it’s not sandboxes? Definitely not sandboxes. Sandboxes are a piece. But oh boy, yeah, no, not only sandboxes, but sandboxes, I’d say, are part of a balanced structure, balanced play area, not part of the play structure but part of a package, probably. What was…? Oh, so, it was a keystone thing.

 

So, once the digital beings were running things efficiently, which from their perspective was heroic, though we may not agree…in their version of the world, they were like, we gotta…the way we playground max is no playgrounds. It’s done. Then we're…'cause again, nothing happens perfect at a playground. Playgrounds aren't perfect, and that just doesn't…that does also…does not compute. We got John Connor; pro playground. Digital…the digital…represented by Skynet, which is a company that’s like the architecture…I don't know. Skynet; no playgrounds. Total efficiency versus…nobody’s perfect. Okay, so that’s…so, that’s how the movie opens. They set it up…again, probably we're in…one minute into the movie now. John Connor’s like, we gotta save the playgrounds. I already tried once. We're gonna send somebody back in time to go help John Connor, who’s now a teen, tween…I'd say tween. He’s a adolescent. Oh boy, is he adolescing.

 

We're gonna send…the first movie, what happened was they sent…John Connor sent his best friend, I think, back in time. Oh boy. You say, wait a second, what? He sends his best friend back in time, and then the character played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, who we’ll call…his name was Mernader. We’ll just call him Mer. Nader? Nader. Maybe Nader’s better. Mernader was his name, though. Mernader. He was a digital…a functioning, digital, organic being. He went back in the first movie and ended up…you know, the complications of time travel only doubled the stakes for T2. So, in T2 they're gonna send…John’s gonna send back a Mernader, 'cause it’s a digital consciousness, I think. It’s memeable? I don't know…to keep John and…'cause the digital beings are sending this thing made of…the T-1000, the liquid…this liquid thing. It’s like malleable, top-of-the-line basic digital being back. Probably using that term wrong, too. Okay, so, I gotta get to the part of the story I’m supposed to be telling, huh?

 

So…okay, so then…gotta feel this stuff out though, right? This is where…it’s like, how am I gonna tell…? It’s such a simple story when it’s visually told. Okay, so, let’s just review. I think you got the first part. Digital versus…playground yay and nay. So, John Connor sends Mernader back to help him and his mom, because he has to make it to the point…I guess this is where you don't mess with time, 'cause it really just reinforces everything. I think they do a really good job not to go on an evaluating tangent, but of like, showing and not telling how when you go…why your sleep podcaster shouldn't time travel, 'cause anytime you time travel, the butterfly wings are wagging. But so, the T-1000, we’ll just call him T. Yeah, that’s easier, T. Yeah, we’ll go T. T-1000, T…not Mr. T, though that would have been pretty cool if he was played by Mr. T, and I guess we could imagine that.

 

If he was recast…if Mr. T was…so, yeah, let’s just say playing…but he’s a digital…so, he gets sent back in time, T, we’ll just call him, though we’ll imagine he’s played by Mr. T at this point. So, T gets sent back in time to playground ‘splain…basically he goes back and he’s gonna talk to John Connor and his mother and say, listen, what do we need to do so in the future you just give up on these ideas of playgrounds? How do we have to…what is it you want or need…? They don't realize in the heart…some people have more joy in their heart, which at some point, off camera, not in the movie, John Connor seems to develop, or maybe he does, but not during the segments I’m watching or that I remember. But he does, or maybe he’s just not…maybe he’s just the leader we needed. So, T goes back to catch up with John Connor and his mom and say, no, no, no, in the future there’s not gonna be any playgrounds. Let’s just deal with this now, in 1991. 1990, we’ll say. 1990, 1991, in the past.

 

I don't know, is that the oldies now, the songs, the nineties? I guess it is, 'cause my daughter went to a Y2K party this weekend. I think we have it. So, that’s how the movie starts. They explain the stuff about the playgrounds, then they show…then we kinda catch up on everybody. So, Mernader goes back. So, we see him travel back to find John and help John and his mom, or mostly just John, but…and we see him acquire…we see him…now, this was mind-blowing when you watched the movie, 'cause in the first movie Mernader was not a positive influence. He was working for the digital future, for Skynet, and he was not pro-playground. In this movie, initially, he doesn’t care about playgrounds either way. He’s just programmed to help John. So, he goes, and you see his skill set shown, not told. He’s able to acquire clothing. I guess apparently time travel you do in the buff, which actually kinda makes sense, like teleporting.

 

So, he get…acquires clothing, he acquires a vehicle, sunglasses, and again, it’s done with…I mean, it’s really done well, especially when the first time you would have seen this movie, or if you've never seen it before, it…if you're going into it with a open mind to be entertained, it is so well done, and so well done for you to kinda be like, wow, I can get behind this Mernader, maybe. But he’s not…he’s also not perfect, kinda like a playground. Okay, so we meet Mernader, then we meet T. So, T travels back, and he…we see that he has more abilities than Mernader. He works a little bit more from a trickster side. I don't even know if it’s a trickster side. But he has more…he’s way more fluid. He’s the definition of plasticity. So, kinda like any of those superheroes that have plastic abilities or fluid abilities. You got Mr. Fantastic, Mr. Plastic, and others. Yeah, it’s like, pretty cool, pretty cool. But he’s also…but he’s a non-positive influence, too. So, he goes back.

 

He doesn't use any of the Mr. T taglines 'cause those are probably owned by somebody else, but we can imagine, you know, that he’s like, I pity the fool. Oh, also Mr. T is a famous…this is from the…Mr. T predates these movies and his relevance, but in this podcast he’s pretty relevant. It would have been…it was really showing his range, because he’s not playing the typical Mr. T character. He’s showing this more fluid, balletic, I would say…probably took ballet classes or some sort of dance to get prepared for this role because it’s a much more fluid role, where Mr. T usually would be like Mernader, who’s played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, and they would kinda be like two mirror…or they'd be like not a mirror…maybe two similar…two similar skill sets. But again, they said, we think you have the range to do this. Luckily none of this ever happened except in my mind right now. So, there we go.

 

So…okay, so, T and Mernader go back in time to the 1990…we’ll just say for easy…probably…looked like spring 1990, a really nice time to be in LA. Then we see…we catch up on…we catch up with Sarah Connor. Now, Sarah Connor has already fall…already shown…she’s trying to warn people about playgrounds. You gotta wonder whose influence, if it was just regular people, like regular current authority figures or there was some sort of future thing playing out. But there we see that she’s under the care of authority figures in a non-positive way because of her adamant feelings about playgrounds that people said no reasonable person would associate…that playgrounds are not a keystone…you're not understanding what a keystone species is. She said, I didn't say keystone species; I said keystone. That’s a totally different also James Cameron movie, I think, but…or that’s part of the ride. Yeah. She said, so, I didn't say that. I said it’s a keystone, a community keystone.

 

They said, we don't have the budget to deal with this kind of nonsense. More playgrounds? No. Better playgrounds? No. What, do you work for Big Playground? But even Big Playground found out about it. So, she was basically there trying to make her go to classes and whatever in a non-positive way. ‘Cause in this movie you're like, are we already moving away from this joy and playground and imperfection? So, we catch up with Sarah. We see Mernader and T. We see a brief thing of the startings of this whole thing at…so, we see a kinda scientist, some coworkers, some sort of laboratory where they're working on this stuff. They say, you know what’s gonna be great for decision-making? Maxing it, simplifying it. No one will ever have to think for themselves again and make some decision about whether playing on a playground’s…imagine the time saved if you don't push anyone on a swing, or you're not just vacantly swinging on a swing. But again, that’s where they're showing, not telling.

 

‘Cause when you see a kid on a swing, it’s relaxing. Then…and again, this is all shown, not told. But then we finally get to the part that I’m supposed to be talking about. Okay, so we get to the part…this part of the movie where we meet John Connor. We’ve checked in with Sarah Connor. The anti-playground establishment, Big Playground, are all trying to get her to stop talking about how important playgrounds are to our future. We meet John Connor and his bestie, and his bestie is like…actually, holy moly, this may be a big leap, but I’m pretty sure his bestie…that stands for best friend, by the way. I think his bestie — now, this is a deep cut, but — is the sidekick of Mr. T, who’s also in other eighties and nineties stuff. But just strange confluence right here, that he was Mr. T’s sidekick in the Mr. T animated series, and it just happens that, at least in this part of the movie that I’m gonna be talking about tonight, there’s a balletic version of Mr. T. We’re just gonna call him T 'cause that’s the character’s name for this part, and he’s this balletic…he’s a playground inspector.

 

So, what happened was the…T got sent back in time, the T-1000, and some point right before…right at this part, he is like…he can change form into any character or person. So, he runs into a character played by Mr. T named T, but not Mr. T; just T, and…who’s a playground inspector, authority figure, got his own vehicle, very official. Los Angeles has a lot of playgrounds, so this isn't some thing I’m just making up. He drives around all day inspecting playgrounds, has a lot of resources, commands a lot of respect at this time in history. T is driving around pretending he’s a playground inspector but really looking for John Connor. We also know that Mernader is looking for John Connor and…to help him.

 

We finally meet John Connor and his bestie, but it’s just weird that his bestie…I'm pretty sure…or someone that looked like him and actually looked like the character in the movie, 'cause he wore a jean jacket with no sleeves. He had kinda hair a bit like a mullet but not quite, and he just has this look like…that he’s gonna say something to you that’s gonna make you frown. If you had a child, you'd be like, huh, I don't know about that kid. He makes me want to frown. Kinda looks like…maybe he does need a hug, but he doesn't look like he wants a hug. He looks like if you offered to give him a hug, he would say something to you that would make you frown. But he seems like a pretty good friend, to be honest, despite my broad judgments about him. He is a good friend to John. So, we meet John. We already see that John has these abilities. He’s working on a motor bike. He’s living in…his home situation is not ideal. So, he’s like, I gotta…so, they're working on this dirt bike, right?

 

So, I want you to just imagine now we're starting out our bedtime story, and John Connor and his bestie are working on their dirt bike. They're getting ready to go do something…go to the mall, man. Then his stepfather says, you gotta come inside and do your chores, clean your room. He says, no way, man. I’m the opposite of a slacker. I’m a doer, and we're going to the mall to do stuff, 'cause this is the age of the eighties and the nineties, when they cross over. So, they hop on his dirt bike and it makes this wonderful sound of like, [mumbles]. The [mumbles] echoes through our ears. It kinda soothes us as they go out on their adolescent journey. Then they start playing some rocking tunes. Really, really good. So, they play a little G&R, which is…Good Enough Roses is the band. You get the sense…and so, you're…we're watching them as they go off on their bike ride, and we really feel good. We feel like through them we're rebellious teens and we're linked by friendship.

 

Then we start to realize that, yeah, this T is looking for him under…pretending to be a playground inspector finding his way to find John and his bestie. Then John and his bestie…we again see another layer of John’s skill set. He’s able to talk to…his ability…some people in these stories have the ability to communicate with animals. He has the ability to communicate with some…he has the ability to interface without even the thing R2-D2 has. He can talk to digital beings, which is kinda strange, but only ones in current…not ones from the future. So, he talks to a being who says, hey, let me give you some money to go to the mall to have fun. Him and his friend…and his friend is there helping him. So, they go off to travel. Meanwhile, the Mernaders and T are both separately looking for John. Let’s see, we get this image of…really other kids riding their bikes and stuff like that. We always hear that noise along with the rock music, [mumbles].

 

We get a brief interlude with John’s mother exercising, 'cause she’s still preparing for playgrounds, and she’s able to make a playground just about anywhere. But she also has to explain to people over and over again; just 'cause you build a playground…you can't build a playground in your heart. It’s a actual, physical…a play structure is a physical place you go to play. We see more of T pretending he’s a playground inspector going to…even checking in with Todd. So, his…the foster parents of John Connor. They say, yeah, he’s probably at the mall. I think that happened before the thing. Also, his bestie asked John, hey, I noticed you carry a picture of your mother around. He goes, yeah, I do, but I’m not happy with her. She’s so…she’s got this thing about playgrounds and she’s…has to go…she had to go to school, out of state, to learn…well, not out of state, but pretty far away to learn that playgrounds are not…you know, they're not efficient uses of resources.

 

Then we get a lot of great…we…of great…of John actually kind of echoing his mom. He’s making the city of Los Angeles into a playground, and on…they're going to the mall, spoiler, but him and his bestie are like, they're making the most of Los Angeles. Then we see the Mernader. He sees John and his bestie riding their dirt bike. He’s on a bike, too. He says, oh, they must…Mernader’s a little bit more…he’s like, okay, I’ll see where they're going. Then we also see the playground inspector, T, interviewing people. Have you seen this kid, John Connor? Here’s a picture of him. I think he’s been at two malls, 'cause they…he interviews two tweens and they say, yeah, he’s probably at the galleria. So, John and his bestie are at the galleria playing video games at a arcade, which is…these have been portrayed in films before. And again, not to spoil the current thing; an old arcade was actually a playground. You did have to pay, but it wasn't a place for just winning tickets with randomized games.

 

It was a place where you played games…I don't want to go…be like, arcade ‘splaining here, but a lot different than what it’s like today, but still it costs money. But again, they got money from this digital friend. But there’s also a great piece of information here, is that John likes to play this game called Playground Defender, where…pretty cool game in the eighties — this was a real game, maybe — where you're not…you're like a regular kid with powers and your job is…kinda like Paper Boy. There was a game called Paper Boy; you delivered newspapers. This is like that, but it’s…it took place in…you could play…there was Playground Defender; that took place in Los Angeles, then there was Playground Defender: New York. That was the sequel. Then there was Playground Defender: World. That came out kinda towards the end of arcade era. But John’s playing Playground Defender, which takes place in Los Angeles just 'cause it was the first version. It didn't say Playground Defender: Los Angeles.

 

But yeah, you defend playgrounds against all sorts of things; environmental factors, forest friends, people, developers, all sorts of things in different…the different things. Then you can also…it was kinda like a combination of a action game and a building game, 'cause if you won certain rounds…and it was like this skateboarding game, 720, 'cause you could do tricks. But then you could keep purchasing other things for…make a bigger and bigger playground at your home playground. But he’s playing Playground Defender. So you say, oh, okay, he’s still connected to his mom and the mission at hand. So, then we're all at the mall. So, the Mernader’s there, T’s there. The Mernader’s carrying flowers, a box of flowers. John and his bestie are at the arcade playing the game, and everybody…the two…Mernader and T are walking around. T kinda starts interviewing more…'cause, hey, I’m a playground inspector. Kids actually like playground inspectors normally.

 

They wouldn't think like…say, oh, they're a authority figure of playgrounds. So, the kids are like, oh yeah, he’s in the arcade, I think. So, then John’s playing another game about flying, and T, the playground inspector, just accidentally asks his bestie, hey, have you seen this kid, John Connor? He’s like, nah, I haven't seen him. So, his bestie…like I said, he’s actually a good friend. He runs up and says, John, you gotta get outta here. There’s a playground inspector looking for you. Seems something…he’s an authority figure. I’m not down…we're not down for any authority figures. So, John makes a run for it, and T follows him. This is action city, right? ‘Cause John knows, huh, something’s not right here. Plus, playground inspectors, unless…that are looking for…that are looking for me, probably part of Big Playground, this whole thing that’s stacked against my mom…maybe a playground activist or someone from Greater Friends of Playgrounds I would talk to.

 

You know, like whatever, like Culver City Friends of Playgrounds, CCFP. Say, okay, I could talk to somebody from that, but a playground…a generic playground inspector who’s played by Mr. T? That’s too much authority, you know? So, John runs out the back door into the back halls of the mall, which is, holy cow, idealized. Every kid’s wished they could run in the back halls of the mall. Now, T, the playground inspector, is following him. Now, I will say that he’s dressed in a way that’s very visually appealing, right? Because he’s dressed in an official way, clean cut, and balletic, like kinda moves smoothly. But he’s chasing after John. Like, I gotta talk to you about your mother’s opinion about playgrounds, is at least what John hears in his head. So, John’s running away in the mall hallways. T’s coming after him saying, I just gotta talk to you about some playgrounds. Then Mernader, who’s gonna…he’s there to help John, but John does not know this.

 

Now, Mernader has come from the future to help John, but when he was acquiring clothing, he was acquiring the clothing of someone…there was once, I think, a video called Bad Boy, and it was…he acquired the clothing that he would…that would fit the image of that, like a rebel with a cause, like we say on Sleep With Me. So, he’s kinda dressed stylishly. He’s wearing sunglasses indoors, which is always a thing…you're like, huh, you're definitely not an authority figure unless you have transition lenses. Then I’d say, maybe. So…okay, so, Mernader is…he’s carrying a box of flowers, though. You say, okay, that’s a interesting idea. But soon we realize his brilliance, because they're roses, and some of the music that’s been playing is sung by Axl Rose from the song Axl and Roses, or Axl and Flowers or whatever. Okay, so, he’s walking towards John. John’s running away from T. Mernader’s walking towards John. John sees him.

 

He’s like a adolescent, then he sees this adult carrying roses, and he’s like, what is this…what? What, is this guy doing flower delivery? So, he…or is this some sort…are they both out to…are they both authority figures? Then the action starts, 'cause then T arrives and the Mernader arrives. John’s in the middle, right? Mernader’s carrying flowers, a big box of flowers. I don't know if they box up roses like this anymore. Now, what does every playground…like, what do authority figures on playgrounds usually have a lot of times? Whistles, right? Very loud whistles. So, John is running. Now he’s caught between these two adults. Both seem like authority figures. Mernader says, cover your ears and get down. John does so, and as he does so, the…T, played by Mr. T, as a playground inspector, he starts blowing his whistle. I can't say that there’s a lot…this is a contained mall hallway. There’s not a lot of places where…blowing a whistle outdoors…ugh.

 

Blowing a whistle indoors with intention is a non-positive experience, and it, of course, brings the attention of other authority figures. So, he’s blowing this whistle like he’s a coach calling a time-out fifty times in a row. It’s the exact opposite of that sound of the dirt bike, [mumbles]. I maybe wish I could hear that. Now, interestingly enough, the move by Mernader is to take the flowers out of the box, and I think this kinda is a little bit of a trickster move. He says, hey, why don't you smell these flowers? But he’s smart enough to only present one flower at a time, which at first confuses the Mr. T character, T, who’s trying to blow his whistle. But I guess I didn't even realize it at the time…I would never be able to think this fast; you can't blow a whistle and smell a flower. When you're presented with a rose, at least initially, your instinct is to smell it. So, he smells it. Actually, unfortunately, while he’s smelling it and pausing, a worker comes in and bumps into the stem of the rose.

 

Oh, they're long-stemmed roses like the kind you buy not at a secondhand store; at a florist’s office. So, the worker bumps into the thing, which is not positive for the worker. Meanwhile, Mernader opens a door and tells John to go through this door. Then, of all the things…all the strange things that could happen of a game I don't think I’ve ever officially played before, but it’s like jumping…or, not jumping jacks. What’s that game called where you put…? Is that jumping jacks? There’s a game where you put numbers in squares on the ground. It’s like a playground game, but it was before my time. But you see it everywhere, and you'd put squares with 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I believe what you do is throw a jack or something there, or a marble, and if it landed on the 4, you're supposed to jump on one leg and skip whatever number had a thing on it. Also, it was in the shape of a T. I never understood it.

 

But then the playground inspector lays that down, but he’s doing it to deceive Mernader and so he can go just…he’s like, we're gonna play this game, and whoever wins, their view of playgrounds will be what John accepts. So, both of them are like, great opportunity. This will resolve the whole film without any further conflict or effort. Meanwhile…but I’ll just tell you, the T character is not being honest. So, what he does is…now, he does it like a long one, 'cause I guess if you're an adult, you'd want to play it like…of course I can jump six spaces over one thing. I mean, I don't know if I can. But these are both action stars, so it’s supposed to be action-based. So, at first he says, why don't you go first and create one? He gives Mernader chalk. He just does a simple one, throws the jack. The guy, T, does it. Then T does it, but he does it into a store full of mannequins everywhere. It kind of is slightly comedic, but again shows like, okay, this person has more…whatever.

 

It’s like…it plays out very quickly on film. But what it ends up doing…they go back and forth until poor Mernader, Arnold, is caught up in all these dresses, and he’s got a hat over his eyes and a scarf, and he’s tripping over mannequins, and that’s when T decides to chase after John again. Say, I won. Now we're gonna discuss my thoughts about the playground. But he had never had any intention of that, you know? John’s smart; he’s like, I don't want anything to do with any authority figures. So, he runs downstairs, gets on his dirt bike. It does take a little while to start his dirt bike, and so, that builds…oh boy, you say, is his dirt bike gonna start? [Mumbles] please, we want to hear that sound, [mumbles]. He starts it. Now, this is, again, the training that went into Mr. T playing this role. Like I said, it’s this role that was different for him, way more fluid, and instead of being overpowering, very…I don't know. So, he is in really good shape, and he runs like Tom Cruise in a Tom Cruise movie after John.

 

John’s trying to ride his bike, you know? He’s running after him, but John’s fast and maneuverable. So, then he borrow…so, then the ballet inspector…or, ballet inspector…he’s ballet-like and he’s running, and Tom Cruise-like in his running. I say, holy cow. But then he’s not fast enough, 'cause the guy’s on a dirt…the kid’s on a dirt bike. So, then he finds the first…he finds this gigantic…one of those tow trucks for semi trucks, and he shows his…he says, playground inspector. I need to take this vehicle. The guy’s like, for what? He goes, I gotta…it’s just…I got a playground to save. The guy goes, okay, fine. So, he takes this huge truck, and meanwhile, John’s gone. John gets back into the LA…the culverts for the LA river, and he thinks he’s totally…he’s like, I’m in great shape. Then the…T, the playground inspector, he takes the truck…since he’s not actually a real playground inspector, he doesn't care about the consequences. He rides this truck…like, has it jump off this thing, then he’s still chasing John.

 

Pretty impressive…and very determined now…say, I’m gonna catch up with you and discuss why we need to close all the playgrounds in the Los Angeles area, even though that’s not the truth. Really, he’s from the future. He’s still trying to play this game. We see John trying to go fast, but he’s in a dirt bike. This guy’s in a truck. Even though John’s kinda trying to use his maneuverability, we see that sooner or later he’s gonna catch up. Then we finally see Mernader catch up. He’s in his own bike, which is a little bit more faster and stronger, and it has a nice sound to it, too, kinda like…I can't even do the sounds. Like a nice, deep-throated…purrs like a…I don't know, is that a Bossa Nova kitten? Is that a thing? It’d be, I guess, a cat. So, he’s…so, he…what he does is he’s up on the…above the culvert. What he does is start throwing rose thorns down at the truck, trying to give the truck of the…of T a flat tire, because he says, I can't have you driving this.

 

He keeps throwing the roses over the side to pop the tires, which…and then he also, smartly, I guess, throws the rose buds at the driver, T, to distract him, right? But this guy is determined. That’s where…that’s why they probably got Mr. T to play this role, was like, he could really focus. Then we see Mernader do a jump — which is really cool — to catch up, 'cause he says, okay, the roses didn't work, the thorns didn't work. So, then he’s behind the truck. So, we have the dirt bike, the truck, and motorcycle. He makes a move, gets by the truck, and then he says, John, ride on my motorcycle. It’s way faster. So, John gets on the motorcycle with him, and he still has a decent amount of roses, so he uses…he says…instead of the…he says, by the power of roses…he throws all these rose stems. He already threw the buds off all of them. There’s so many that of course it gives the truck a flat tire.

 

It comes to a stop, and then…they stop far enough away, 'cause then T gets out of the truck and he’s like…they're far enough away he can't run to catch up, but he’s like, this isn't my truck. I don't even know…where’s the spare tire for…how do you tow a tow truck for a tow…? Is there a tow truck for a tow truck for a tow truck? He’s like, what do I even…where’s the jack in this thing? This thing doesn't have a trunk. It was a bit like a sleep podcast. He’s walking around…they're right over there. I gotta get this…this is my job. I’m sent from the future. I gotta…again, very good acting, 'cause from his character’s perspective, he’s there to save the world, like save the future, because if he…if playgrounds were in the future, digital beings wouldn't have authority, by the way, everybody listening, hinty, hint, hint. Let’s keep those playgrounds because…so…but he’s…so, he’d say that he’s overreacting, but he says, I gotta get this tire changed so I can catch up with them.

 

Now meanwhile, to make it more dramatic, Mernader and John are just sitting there watching him, and they're having a little bit of a laugh 'cause they think it’s all over. They think, this guy’s never gonna change his tire. He’s right; he’ll be here all day. What kind…can you even jack up a truck? Also, it’s…more than one tire’s flat. They even blow…they take the rest of the rose buds, they put them in their hands, and they blow the rose petals at him, which really dampens his spirit as he’s trying to pace around this truck. He starts looking, 'cause trucks don't have a trunk. They have those side things, so he’s trying to get those open, then he’s trying to find the keys, and then he gets rose petals blown at him. So, it’s really disheartening for him. But I mean, honestly, he works for the anti-playground group from digital beings from the future. So, it’s like, we can't have that much sympathy for him.

 

It actually helps us kinda feel more connected, that there’s joy…if you've ever blown rose petals at your nemesis, it feels pretty good, even if it’s not the end of the film. So you say, okay, this is still gonna go on. Yeah, with that, those two ride off together, and you think, holy cow, this whole thing is resolved. Playgrounds will exist forever, which in our hearts they will and in the world they will, but in this piece of fiction, how will we resolve this? Will there be a time when playgrounds don't compute? Will Skynet take the keystone of our community away or just say, playgrounds…play structures…oh, this is a dirt lot. You can play here all you want. It’s a playground. It’s got two big rocks. Okay, well, I mean, I agree with you, but couldn't we have a play structure here? So, anyway, enough about all that. I hope you enjoyed our tale with…from T2, The Last Playground. Mernader, The Last Playground. Goodnight, everybody.

 

[End of recording]

Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes

Crossover

 

Barbra Streisand

https://www.barbra-archives.info/

https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-28562156

https://slate.com/culture/2017/11/why-barbra-streisand-will-be-relevant-forever.html

 

Terminator 2

https://excellentleathershop.com/blog/the-terminator-2-the-movie-and-its-legacy/?srsltid=AfmBOopfkZmc7bKv_abbIUcNtFLmJgniCWYISFL9peEy4iiiBZM_AlEw

https://onemannsmovies.com/film-review/terminator-2-judgment-day-review/

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2021/jul/03/terminator-2-at-30-groundbreaking-sequel-that-led-to-cgi-laziness

 

Playgrounds

https://savingplaces.org/stories/how-we-came-to-play-the-history-of-playgrounds

https://www.nycgovparks.org/about/history/playgrounds

https://www.aaastateofplay.com/history-of-playgrounds/

 

Tom Cruise Running

https://www.balancedrunner.com/tom-cruise-running-form-analysis/

https://screencrush.com/every-shot-of-tom-cruise-running/

https://floodmagazine.com/40943/zen-and-the-art-of-watching-tom-cruise-run/

 

DOWN TO BUSINESS

This podcast may not be novel, but it’ll feature a novelization later

I’m just here to hang out with you

Am I in a silly mood? Let’s see

Crossover with the Novelizers podcast

Covering T2: The Final Playground

 

PLUGS

Novelizers Podcast; Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

 

SPONSORS

Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; AquaTru; Talkiatry; Quince; DripDrop; Cozy Earth

 

INTRO

Sometimes thoughts bubble up or pop up

It could also be feelings

I’m all about feeling feelings

But just not as I go to sleep

Feelings about feelings about feelings

Isn’t that a Barbra Streisand song?

My Internal Barba-logue

That’s a new word from SWM that I actually like

I was born without an internal barbalogue

That also reminds me of the song “Barbara Ann”

I’m not intentionally trying to be funny

My Internal Nana is telling me that nothing about this is funny

I got an internal nana that lives within me instead of an internal barbalogue

The show is about bringing you some kind of relief

I’m just here to make it a little bit better if I can

Other listeners are sending you comfort and kindness right now

The Indirect Connection We Share

People around the world are rooting for one another right now

I’m imperfect

We want you to flourish

What was I talking about? Barbasol?

Oh, the song I was thinking about is “People”

sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou

Maybe you have a friend that could go on a Barbalogue

I’m just a friend you don’t have to pay attention to

I’ll be here whether you’re awake or not

Talking about nothing for a while

Reinventing T2 and playgrounds

Something not bad to listen to

Explaining the show structure

Sometimes I repeat my tangents

Variety and Familiarity

It’s nice to be eased into bedtime

You never know what’s going to come up

 

STORY

A crossover with the Novelizers podcast

The first one we did was The Matrix

This time we’re doing T2

You Do Do Not Bring Me Flowers, Anymore

First we’ll do a bedtime story version

We’ll do a more idealized version

We’ll stick with T2 for now

How do I even start this?

It’s a good thing they don’t  allow bedtime storytellers to time travel

I watched it 2 days ago, and my memory is already hazy

Is the story told from Sarah Connor or John Connor’s perspective?

Show it, don’t tell it, Scoots

Once upon a time…

Slices of life of Los Angeles

Maybe Antonio Banderas could verify this for us

Great aspects of living in community

One great aspect: playgrounds

T2 is all about playgrounds and how playgrounds change

How come when you get in a hot tub, dudes explain topics to you that they would never discuss anywhere else?

Playstructure-splaining

Maybe I’d listen to Roman Mars talk about it

In this film, playgrounds are depicted mostly positively

Playstructure Closure Day

Maybe playstructures are on your mind right now

Honest depictions of jobs, traffic, and playgrounds

In John Connor’s world, the things are moving towards playground-maxxing

Entering an automated, digital realm

Digital beings will explain playgrounds to us

Are we ever gonna get to the movie? Maybe

Where was I? Oh right, playgrounds

Does Not Compute

Digital beings handle stuff

They paved paradise and dematerialized all playgrounds at once

A future without playgrounds

Future John Connor stood up for this

Digital beings were always pushing for efficiency

Bring Back Playgrounds (BBP)

This is mostly exposition from T1 and the start of T2

Who knew that playgrounds were the keystone to community?

Definitely not just sandboxes

Digital playgrounds are represented by SkyNet

Total Efficiency vs Nobody’s Perfect

Sending someone back in time to help John Connor

Oh boy, JC is an adolescent now

Arnold’s character is called…Mer Nator

The T1000 Liquid Thing

I gotta get to the part of the story that I’m supposed to be telling

John sends Mer Nator back in time to help him and his mom

Let’s imagine that the T1000 is played by Mr. T. We’ll call him T

T gets sent back inside to playground-splain to JC and Sarah

Are the 90s old now?

Mer Nator goes back to help John

He gets clothes and sunglasses

It is so well done

I could get behind this Mer Nator

Then we meet T

T operates more from a Trickster side

The definition of plasticity

He doesn’t use any of Mr. T’s catchphrases

It’s a more fluid, balletic side

Mr. T has a broader range than people give him credit for

It looks like Spring, 1990

Cut to Sarah Connor

She was trying to warn people about playgrounds

Digital beings offer to think about playgrounds for us

All show, no tell

Then we finally get to the part that I’m supposed to talk about

We meet John and Sarah

Big Playground is trying to silence Sarah

We meet John and his bestie

I think John’s bestie is the sidekick of Mr. T in the Mr. T animated series

T can change into any form

They meet T as a playground inspector

Wearing a jean jacket and no sleeves

He’s the kind of kid that makes you want to frown

But he seems like a good friend

I’ll stop judging this child

John clearly has some abilities. He’s repairing a dirt bike

John wants to go to the mall to do stuff

He’s not gonna slack

The dirtbike makes a wonderful sound

Then they play some GnR

Then we see that T is looking for him

We see another layer of John’s skillset

John has the ability to interface

He can talk to digital beings!

He talks to a being that gives him to have fun

Mer Nator and T are looking for John

A brief interlude of Sarah exercising and preparing for the future

T checks in with John’s foster parents to find his location

John is not happy with his mom

John and his bestie are turning LA into their own personal playground

Mer Nator sees John and follows him

T interviews people at the mall

John’s probably at the Galleria

Playing video games at an arcade

An old arcade is a form of playground

I don’t want to arcade-splain

Playground Defender

Kind of like Paperboy

It was a combination of action and building game

Then we’re all at the mall

Mer Nator carries flowers

T interviews more people

People trust the playground inspector

John plays more games

John’s bestie doesn’t tell T that John is there

I guess he is a good friend

He tells John to run

We’re not down for any authority figures

John runs and T follows

Action City

Culver City Friends of Playgrounds (CCFP)

John runs into the back halls of the mall

Idealized Back Halls of the Mall

T is dressed very appealingly

John doesn’t realize that Mer Nator is there to help him

Mer Nator acquired the clothes of a bad boy

He’s wearing sunglasses indoors. Enough said. 

The music in this is sung by Axl Rose

John is confused by Mer’s flowers

Then the action starts

Playground Inspectors always have very loud whistles

Mer Nator tells John to duck

T blows his whistle

Contained Mall Hallway

Blowing a whistle indoors with intention is never positive

Mer Nator takes the flowers out of the box

Smell these flowers!

This confuses T

You can’t blow a whistle and smell a flower at the same time

A random mall worker bumps into T’s whistle

Mer Nator tells John to run through an open door

What’s the game with squares? Jumping Jacks? Hopscotch?

T insists they play hopscotch

T hopscotches into a store

Mer Nator is caught up in all these clothes

Then T starts chasing after John again

John starts his dirt bike

T runs like Tom Cruise

T takes a gigantic tow truck

John is in the LA River culverts

T chases John

Then Mer Nator catches up on his own bike

He’s throwing rose thorns down on the truck

Then he throws the rose buds at T

But T is very determined

Then Mer Nator does a jump to catch up

He passes the truck

John gets on the motorcycle with him

He throws all these rose stems at the truck

The truck stops

How do you call a tow truck for a tow truck?

T thinks he’s the hero

It’s very good acting

He thinks he’s here to save the future

Hint hint (keep playgrounds around)

Mer Nator and John are just laughing at him

It feels good to blow rose petals at your nemesis

And the two of them ride off

Things are resolved…for now

I hope you enjoyed this tale

 

SUMMARY:

Episode: 1466

Title: T2: Last Playground | Novelizers Crossover

Plugs: Novelizers Podcast; Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

Sponsors: Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; AquaTru; Talkiatry; Quince; DripDrop; Cozy Earth

Notable Language:

• My Internal Barba-logue
• The Indirect Connection We Share
• You Do Do Not Bring Me Flowers, Anymore
• Playstructure-splaining
• Playstructure Closure Day
• Playground-maxxing
• Does Not Compute
• Bring Back Playgrounds (BBP)
• Mer Nator
• T1000 Liquid Thing
• The definition of plasticity
• Muh muh muh
• Arcade-splaining
• Action City
• Idealized Back Halls of the Mall
• Contained Mall Hallway

 

Notable Culture:

• • Novelizers podcast
  • T2: The Final Playground

• Terminator 2: Judgment Day

• • “Feelings about Feelings about Feelings” – Barbra Streisand
  • “Barbara Ann” – Beach Boys
  • My Internal Nana
  • Barbasol
  • “People” – Barbra Streisand
  • sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou
  • Los Angeles
  • Antonio Banderas
  • Roman Mars
  • “Big Yellow Taxi” – Joni Mitchell
  • Mr. Fantastic / Fantastic Four
  • Mr. T
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger
  • Guns ‘n’ Roses
  • R2D2 / Star Wars
  • Playground Defender video game

• Paperboy video game

• Culver City Friends of Playgrounds (CCFP)
• Hopscotch
• Tom Cruise

 

Notable Talking Points:

• Sometimes thoughts bubble up or pop up
• It could also be feelings
• I’m all about feeling feelings
• But just not as I go to sleep
• Feelings about feelings about feelings
• Isn’t that a Barbra Streisand song?
• My Internal Barba-logue
• That’s a new word from SWM that I actually like
• I was born without an internal barbalogue
• That also reminds me of the song “Barbara Ann”
• I’m not intentionally trying to be funny
• My Internal Nana is telling me that nothing about this is funny
• I got an internal nana that lives within me instead of an internal barbalogue
• The show is about bringing you some kind of relief
• I’m just here to make it a little bit better if I can
• Other listeners are sending you comfort and kindness right now
• The Indirect Connection We Share
• People around the world are rooting for one another right now
• I’m imperfect
• We want you to flourish
• What was I talking about? Barbasol?
• Oh, the song I was thinking about is “People”
• sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou
• Maybe you have a friend that could go on a Barbalogue
• I’m just a friend you don’t have to pay attention to
• I’ll be here whether you’re awake or not
• Talking about nothing for a while
• Reinventing T2 and playgrounds
• Something not bad to listen to
• Explaining the show structure
• Sometimes I repeat my tangents
• Variety and Familiarity
• It’s nice to be eased into bedtime
• You never know what’s going to come up
• A crossover with the Novelizers podcast
• The first one we did was The Matrix
• This time we’re doing T2
• You Do Do Not Bring Me Flowers, Anymore
• First we’ll do a bedtime story version
• We’ll do a more idealized version
• We’ll stick with T2 for now
• How do I even start this?
• It’s a good thing they don’t  allow bedtime storytellers to time travel
• I watched it 2 days ago, and my memory is already hazy
• Is the story told from Sarah Connor or John Connor’s perspective?
• Show it, don’t tell it, Scoots
• Once upon a time…
• Slices of life of Los Angeles
• Maybe Antonio Banderas could verify this for us
• Great aspects of living in community
• One great aspect: playgrounds
• T2 is all about playgrounds and how playgrounds change
• How come when you get in a hot tub, dudes explain topics to you that they would never discuss anywhere else?
• Playstructure-splaining
• Maybe I’d listen to Roman Mars talk about it
• In this film, playgrounds are depicted mostly positively
• Playstructure Closure Day
• Maybe playstructures are on your mind right now
• Honest depictions of jobs, traffic, and playgrounds
• In John Connor’s world, the things are moving towards playground-maxxing
• Entering an automated, digital realm
• Digital beings will explain playgrounds to us
• Are we ever gonna get to the movie? Maybe
• Where was I? Oh right, playgrounds
• Does Not Compute
• Digital beings handle stuff
• They paved paradise and dematerialized all playgrounds at once
• A future without playgrounds
• Future John Connor stood up for this
• Digital beings were always pushing for efficiency
• Bring Back Playgrounds (BBP)
• This is mostly exposition from T1 and the start of T2
• Who knew that playgrounds were the keystone to community?
• Definitely not just sandboxes
• Digital playgrounds are represented by SkyNet
• Total Efficiency vs Nobody’s Perfect
• Sending someone back in time to help John Connor
• Oh boy, JC is an adolescent now
• Arnold’s character is called…Mer Nator
• The T1000 Liquid Thing
• I gotta get to the part of the story that I’m supposed to be telling
• John sends Mer Nator back in time to help him and his mom
• Let’s imagine that the T1000 is played by Mr. T. We’ll call him T
• T gets sent back inside to playground-splain to JC and Sarah
• Are the 90s old now?
• Mer Nator goes back to help John
• He gets clothes and sunglasses
• It is so well done
• I could get behind this Mer Nator
• Then we meet T
• T operates more from a Trickster side
• The definition of plasticity
• He doesn’t use any of Mr. T’s catchphrases
• It’s a more fluid, balletic side
• Mr. T has a broader range than people give him credit for
• It looks like Spring, 1990
• Cut to Sarah Connor
• She was trying to warn people about playgrounds
• Digital beings offer to think about playgrounds for us
• All show, no tell
• Then we finally get to the part that I’m supposed to talk about
• We meet John and Sarah
• Big Playground is trying to silence Sarah
• We meet John and his bestie
• I think John’s bestie is the sidekick of Mr. T in the Mr. T animated series
• T can change into any form
• They meet T as a playground inspector
• Wearing a jean jacket and no sleeves
• He’s the kind of kid that makes you want to frown
• But he seems like a good friend
• I’ll stop judging this child
• John clearly has some abilities. He’s repairing a dirt bike
• John wants to go to the mall to do stuff
• He’s not gonna slack
• The dirtbike makes a wonderful sound
• Then they play some GnR
• Then we see that T is looking for him
• We see another layer of John’s skillset
• John has the ability to interface
• He can talk to digital beings!
• He talks to a being that gives him to have fun
• Mer Nator and T are looking for John
• A brief interlude of Sarah exercising and preparing for the future
• T checks in with John’s foster parents to find his location
• John is not happy with his mom
• John and his bestie are turning LA into their own personal playground
• Mer Nator sees John and follows him
• T interviews people at the mall
• John’s probably at the Galleria
• Playing video games at an arcade
• An old arcade is a form of playground
• I don’t want to arcade-splain
• Playground Defender
• Kind of like Paperboy
• It was a combination of action and building game
• Then we’re all at the mall
• Mer Nator carries flowers
• T interviews more people
• People trust the playground inspector
• John plays more games
• John’s bestie doesn’t tell T that John is there
• I guess he is a good friend
• He tells John to run
• We’re not down for any authority figures
• John runs and T follows
• Action City
• Culver City Friends of Playgrounds (CCFP)
• John runs into the back halls of the mall
• Idealized Back Halls of the Mall
• T is dressed very appealingly
• John doesn’t realize that Mer Nator is there to help him
• Mer Nator acquired the clothes of a bad boy
• He’s wearing sunglasses indoors. Enough said. 
• The music in this is sung by Axl Rose
• John is confused by Mer’s flowers
• Then the action starts
• Playground Inspectors always have very loud whistles
• Mer Nator tells John to duck
• T blows his whistle
• Contained Mall Hallway
• Blowing a whistle indoors with intention is never positive
• Mer Nator takes the flowers out of the box
• Smell these flowers!
• This confuses T
• You can’t blow a whistle and smell a flower at the same time
• A random mall worker bumps into T’s whistle
• Mer Nator tells John to run through an open door
• What’s the game with squares? Jumping Jacks? Hopscotch?
• T insists they play hopscotch
• T hopscotches into a store
• Mer Nator is caught up in all these clothes
• Then T starts chasing after John again
• John starts his dirt bike
• T runs like Tom Cruise
• T takes a gigantic tow truck
• John is in the LA River culverts
• T chases John
• Then Mer Nator catches up on his own bike
• He’s throwing rose thorns down on the truck
• Then he throws the rose buds at T
• But T is very determined
• Then Mer Nator does a jump to catch up
• He passes the truck
• John gets on the motorcycle with him
• He throws all these rose stems at the truck
• The truck stops
• How do you call a tow truck for a tow truck?
• T thinks he’s the hero
• It’s very good acting
• He thinks he’s here to save the future
• Hint hint (keep playgrounds around)
• Mer Nator and John are just laughing at him
• It feels good to blow rose petals at your nemesis
• And the two of them ride off
• Things are resolved…for now
• I hope you enjoyed this tale