1189 – Charlie and Wonka and The Tale of the Tape Part 2
Come with me and you’ll be in a world purely pointless tangent, they will spin and you win a bedtime so sleepy.
-
Episode 1189 – Charlie and Wonka and The Tale of the Tape Part 2
[START OF RECORDING]
SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster who’s here…you wouldn’t…you’d say, I’m not a wonk, though if…I don't know, I’ve heard…this is one of the many words I don't understand the def…they say I’m a policy wonk. I’d say, I’m not even a candy wonk. I don't know what a wonk is. I know what Willy Wonka…I don't even…honestly, I wouldn’t even know where to go to get some Wonka candy. Probably the grocery store. Another thing to get…put on my…I guess…well, they could go to a candy store. But tonight we’re talking about Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the movie, the motion picture from 1971. This will be our second hour talking about it.
Oh boy, are…you’re in for a treat you could sleep to, because I’m full of pointless meanders and superfluous tangents. Welcome to Sleep With Me, the podcast that’s here to put you to sleep because you deserve a good night’s sleep. You deserve a friend in the deep, dark night. That’s me applying for the role to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff so you can get that sleep you need, your life is more manageable. I make this show because I love making it and because I’ve been there in the deep, dark night. So happy to be here. If you’re new, this show is a bit different. It does take some getting used to, so just see how it goes. I’m just here to help and to keep you company. What we got coming up is support, then a long, meandering intro meant to ease you into bedtime, and then we’ll talk about Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the motion picture.
I don't know why I love saying that lately, but it just makes me laugh. I have no idea why. There was Star Trek the Motion Picture and there was something else the motion picture. Those are the only ones I can think of. It wasn’t Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory the Motion Picture, 'cause that’s more than a mouthful of chocolate. Ba-dum-bum. But you say…but then some part of my brain literally said, of celluloid. I said, thanks. Maybe you’re…that part of my brain could be a wonk. It’s not…it’s wonking on my door. So, anyway, see how it goes. I’ll be here for over an hour to keep you company as you fall asleep. Welcome to Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. Thanks for making it possible, my patron peeps.
INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts on your mind, thoughts about the past, the present, the future, things…thinking thoughts, thoughts with a -ght or thoughts…like, just no T. You could…thoughts, it could be feelings, anything coming up for you, feelings related to those thoughts or feelings that are left over, feelings that are just making their appearance now late in the day, right…right in time for bedtime.
Feelings; you might not think you need us right now. It may not…is this a good time? Is this inconvenient? It’s time to feel. But no, feelings that are coming up, it could be physical sensations, changes in time, temperature, routine. You know who I haven’t given a shout-out to is the third shift, anybody working a third shift or even a second shift or a first shift, the fourth shift. How about a fourth shift in 4D? Like, people working on 4D attractions on the fourth shift? Again, a lot of people say, Scoots, there’s not really…there’s not fourth and fifth shifts. I say, there are…within my mind there’s more than twenty-four hours…twenty-four shifts of thoughts, feelings…but whatever it is that’s keeping you awake, I’m here to take your mind off of it and keep you company while you fall asleep, which is a bit different than most other sleep things.
This show is very different. I make the show, as I said earlier, because you deserve a good night’s sleep, right? You deserve a bedtime you could at least feel neutral about or at least a bedtime you don’t have to dread. Especially when I’m really going through it, I’ll start dreading Sunday night on Friday afternoon, or definitely by Saturday. You deserve a bedtime, ideally after a while whether this podcast is a part of it or not, that you could look forward to and you say, well, at least I have these things that I know I like at bedtime, and that’s what’s been working for me. That’s why I make the show, one, because I really do believe you deserve enough sleep so your life is manageable and you could be out there flourishing and living your life. That’s important to me. It means your world’s better.
That means the whole world we’re in is a better place. That’s one reason, and the other reason is 'cause I’ve been there, like I said, and so have a lot of other people that are listening. I might not have been through the exact same thing that you’re going through, whatever’s keeping you awake, but I can probably relate to how it feels, and if I can’t, I could tell you there’s somebody listening right now who can who’s nodding along and saying, yeah, that’s tough. I’m really glad you’re here. I hope this podcast can help you. What I’m gonna do is I’m gonna send my voice across the deep, dark night. I’m gonna use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents, which means I’m gonna get mixed up, and then I’m gonna go off topic, then I’m gonna double back, then I’ll forget what I was talking about, then I’ll say, wait a second…then I’ll talk about something else.
Pointless meanders and superfluous tangents…creaky, dulcet tones means that my voice is not traditionally soothing. Yeah, it’s meant to keep you company. This is a podcast you don’t really listen to. It’s more like elevated background noise. If elevated noise was lower level…you’d say, it’s not elevated background noise 'cause that’s the kinda thing angels would make, or pixies or other beings that are associated with bells…things associated with jingling, or artistes. So, you’re not elevated background noise. I say, thanks, brain, but I wouldn’t say…we’re like sub-background noise. We’re below background noise but we’re not, because that’s probably a technical term that’s a lower…a background noise you’re not aware of.
This is more of a talking that you don’t need to listen to that part of your brain has probably already figured out; oh, I don't really need to pay attention to this man. He’s strange, he’s well-intentioned, and he just goes on and on and on and never makes very much sense. He tries to…he’s somebody who’s counting his change. He doesn’t have a lot of spare change, but he’s counting it and he’s saying, one penny…oh, let me turn this penny over. Let me see if…is that a ha’penny? No, is it one of those wheat pennies? Is that a thing, a wheat penny? Has anyone said…is that a thing if you’re named Penny and people say, ha’penny? You’d say…what if someone says, is that another thing? ‘Cause there was that show with Penny on it that was really popular.
Did anybody say…they said, hello, Penny, and she said, a ha’penny will do? Was that ever…? That could have been a joke on the show once or twice, or maybe it was a ongoing routine. But yeah, so, that’s what happens. I start counting my change and then I start to think, is there a knock-knock joke in there? But this podcast is more full of undeveloped jokes. That’s not elevated, either. But it’s a podcast you just kind of…you say, uh-huh, okay, I get it, man. You’re trying to…uh-huh. So, that’s part of it. It’s like a out-of-focus picture that you say, oh, that’s probably something nice; I don't need to figure out what it is. It’s also a podcast that doesn’t put you to sleep. I’m here to keep you company while you fall asleep, not to put you to sleep. That’s why the shows are over an hour. There’s no pressure to fall asleep.
I’m here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff whether you’re awake or asleep, 'cause there’s people who are listening, a small percentage of listeners, but I want those people to know they’re not alone, either. I’m here to the very end whether you’re awake or asleep. I’m here to be your friend in the deep, dark night, and you just fall…at some point you just say, I have no idea what he was talk…at first I thought he was talking about ha’pennies, but then I said, I think you’re referring to the wheat penny. Then I realized he was talking about…he called it Third Rock from the Sun, but he realized that wasn’t the right name of the show. Then he called that…then he said, is that John Larroquette or John Lovett?
Then he said, no, it’s not, but now I can’t think of the…but he said, 'cause I was just talking about that John 'cause he was in Footloose, and then he went back to trying to explain what his podcast was. So, yeah, I don't know, but I slept great. I have no idea what the podcast…it was supposed to be about Willy Wonka, but I don't know if he ever talked about Willy Wonka. So, that’s kinda the gist of it, is I’m here to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your bore-bestie, your neigh-bore, your friend in the deep, dark night who’s just here on-call rambling…the rambler, the incoherent rambler. So, let’s see, so, it’s a pod…oh, most people don’t like this show on the first few tries, or it doesn’t work for them, and that’s from people that pay for the podcast that I hear from.
They say, man, I didn’t like the show the first few times I listened to it, or it didn’t put me to sleep 'cause I kept waiting for it to get started or I kept waiting for the magic to happen. It’s kind of like if I was a magician and if Sleep With Me was a magic show, it would just be me setting up my stage and stuffing…what are those things called? Kerchiefs…I almost called them herchiefs. Herchiefs. I could do that; I’d say, oh, this is…these aren’t kerchiefs 'cause they’re not mine. I borrowed them from my mom. They’re herchiefs. Now I’m just gonna put these in my sleeve, here. Don't worry; all part of the routine. I’ve got a rabbit here. Okay, check. I would have a checklist. I’d say, it wouldn’t…if I had a checklist, it would be crumbled up in probably…in a few different pieces…it’d be on scraps of paper.
Okay, rabbit; check. Rabbit feed; check. Carrots; check. Oh, this is the…oh. Cedar rabbit flakes; check. A salt lick…oh. It’s a shopping list. Then I would go…I’d have one of those…a top hat, okay. Magic wand; check. Magic; question mark. Okay, okay. That would be the whole…you’d say, that was…I thought you were gonna do magic tricks. Oh no, this is…it’s just a metaphor within a sleep podcast. But yeah, it never gets started. The magic never…that’s…so, that’s what people said; they said, oh, I wondered when the show was gonna get started, and then after three tries I realized, oh, it’s always going. Sleep With Me; always going nowhere.
It’s just…also, the other thing is if you get to the show and you’re anything like me or most listeners, you’re probably already frustrated. You’re probably already skeptical, you’ve probably tried a ton of different stuff to help you fall asleep, and you’re probably aggravated 'cause you said, man, I’m just trying to get some sleep here. Somebody told me about this show or I just searched for it and now you’re talking in my ears. So, that’s a normal way to get the show. You probably spent a lot of money on different sleep stuff. So, this is gonna take some getting used to. Now, if you…if the show never works for you or you just are like, oh, I don't think I like you, that’s fine, too. That’s a normal reaction.
Sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou has a ton of other sleepy stuff on there. You could check out other sleep podcasts and other stuff I’ve used to fall asleep. So, those are a couple pieces of information that I try to tell people about just so you give…a heads-up. But also, this show follows a structure that needs some explanation, too. So, the show starts out with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. That way, you feel seen and welcomed in and you say, okay, I’ll try this podcast out and see how it goes. Then there’s support so the show could be free, and then after the support, what we’re in now, is called the intro and it’s very long. It’s not a concise intro, and I just go on and on and on.
It’s usually somewhere between twelve and twenty minutes long, and I’ve done, whatever…I don't…how many episodes have we done, like, 11…almost 1,200 episodes? I’ve never done the same intro twice. I probably talked about the same stuff multiple times. But the intro follows a similar structure every time, but it’s different every time, one, for regular listeners, so you have something new for…to listen to, to see what I go on a tangent about. Two, because I believe that the parts of me that keep me up, they can adjust pretty quickly, and that’s what’s not worked for me with other stuff in the past, is the idea of descending a staircase or whatever, or different things my brain…or listening to crickets.
They say, okay, well, this is…the same cricket’s gonna be…Old Chirpy’s coming on in eight minutes, and…so, I just adapt in a non-positive way to most sleep stuff. So, having the show be different every single time, it’s important to me and it’s also important to me 'cause you know I’m not here just dialing it in. I’m here to give you the pointless…the best possible pointless meanders I can. But the other thing…and this is really frustrating if you’re new. The reason the intro goes on and on and on is so you have some time to get ready for bed or to start to unwind. While there is a small percentage of people that skip the intro and a small percentage of people that we’re so happy for that are already asleep or for people who’s partners are sound asleep, oh, we’re so happy for you.
But for most people — and this includes myself — it does take a little transition time, a easing into bedtime or a slow lowering of the volume on the day. That’s just what’s been shown to work, what I’ve seen work for me most of the time. So, the intro kinda serves that purpose. You could do something…you could get ready for bed, you could be in…get…why can’t I say that? In bed getting comfortable, or you could be just doing some other chill wind-down activity. But the idea is just to have a little bedtime routine and transition from being awake to asleep. So, that’s the other thing the intro does.
Then there’s support again between the intro and the story, and then tonight’s story will be the second…the majority of the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, 'cause I started talking about it in another episode, but then I just realized…I talked about it for fifty-five minutes and I was like, oh, okay, the movie never…we just got to the very beginning when Willy Wonka came out. So, we’ll talk about it some more and oh boy, will it be…the idea of me trying to remember a movie that I want to call the motion picture, it’s very sleepy stuff. I’ll even talk about an amusement park I went to that…so, yeah. So, that’s the structure of the show and that’s really why I make the show. I know how it feels. I really enjoy being able to be the person that talks to you and keeps you company. I think it’s an important job.
I try to balance being barely funny and silly and friendly but also just being here for you because I know when I can’t sleep, whether I’m alone or in a room with my family…I was in a house full of kids growing up. Even then it felt very lonely when I couldn’t sleep. I don't know, that’s just what works. I think about the show for the people it works for…is I’m gonna be here talking, and you could sleep through it and not pay attention to it 'cause there’s no pressure to do that, but I’m gonna be here for you. So, I’m glad you’re here. I really appreciate you coming by. I work really hard. I yearn and I strive, and I really hope I can help you fall asleep. One more time, thanks again for coming by, and here’s a couple ways I’m able to do it for you for free twice a week.
Alright everybody, it’s Scoots here, and this is Part 2 of unexpectedly a two-part episode. So, settle in as I’m gonna be talking about Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the 1970s film. I started in typical Sleep With Me fashion, though I don't know if it’s ever happened with Tale of the Tape. I never got to the movie. I talked about it for about fifty-five minutes or something and…well, I got to the movie; I just didn’t get to the Willy…we got as far as the chocolate factory. No, actually, we got as far as outside of the chocolate factory. So, when we last left off in Part 1, I…okay, this is called a Tale of the Tape episode where I try to remember the plot of a movie that was…that I saw a lot at some point in my life and had a major impact on me.
So, in the first episode, I kinda talked about how and when and why…or I saw…or this film had a impact on me, and then I started to remember the movie. Now, this is the Gene Wilder version of Charlie and the Chocolate factory, and the parts I remembered so far was Charlie Buck…well, I don't know if his name’s Charlie Bucket or that’s some Dickensian character. But there’s Charlie, his grandfather, Charlie’s mother, and Charlie’s other grandparents. They all live together. Charlie goes to school, sells newspapers. Charlie’s mom works very hard. Also, in the town they live in, there’s a gigantic chocolate factory shrouded in mystery. At some point…I guess I don't…think I talked about this.
I don't remember why…I think…oh, because there was so many secrets…secret methods of producing chocolate that Willy Wonka said to Willy Wonka’s staff, I’m replacing you with beings from another world, and…that can keep secrets and that are gonna live here or something. So, the factory was sealed from the public forever, but the chocolate was still loved or beloved by children and adults. But then I guess…I don't know if it was ever established that Wonka was looking for a heir or someone to take over. Also, these are based on books that I never read and I know absolutely nothing about. There was another movie and we talked about that in Part 1, and I don't think I’ll remember…I mean, maybe if we have time I’ll talk about that movie and what I remember of it.
But most of the time I watched that movie was before I got sober. So, this is a movie I saw as a kid before I discovered things that would make trouble in my life. I don't think I’ve ever seen John August’s…I think that one is called Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, where this one’s called Willy Wonka. Maybe the only thing I remember is…what’s it…? Oh no, it wasn’t Christopher Plummer. Was it Christopher Plummer in that movie, or is it Christopher Lee? I think it’s Christopher Lee, not Christopher Plummer. In fact, now I can hear Christopher Lee’s voice, so I’m pretty sure Christopher Lee’s in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as Charlie’s father. But we’re talking about Willy Wonka. So, what happened was — in the last one we covered — Willy Wonka has this contest, golden ticket.
If you have a golden ticket, you as a child and an adult guest can come tour the factory. Slugworth; that’s what I just…I don't think I remembered that. There’s also…I think I forgot to talk about that. There’s also a mysterious character called Slugworth who apparently is Charlie…or Willy Wonka’s main rival who’s looking to pay children that go on the tour to get Slugworth any sort of…industrial espionage, I guess. I mean, that’s what it is. So, there’s a mysterious figure, Slugworth, and of course Charlie and his family could use the money. I don't know how much money Slugworth’s offering, but enough to change lives. So, they go and it’s the day of the thing, and then everybody…it’s a big deal…worldwide it’s a big deal, and there’s these…group of kids that we’ll catch back up with as they enter the house, or the factory.
Willy Wonka welcomes them. It’s kind of spectacular, though in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, I remember it was much more spectacular. I remember there was some sort of clockwork animated show. I’m gonna have to rewatch that. But so, then they go into the factory and they have to sign a waiver. This is kinda where we left off. There’s also…when they talk about a series of scenes versus a coherent movie, for my brain, this is more of a series of scenes than…I mean, 'cause it’s not really…well, I don't know. It is really just a series of scenes from there on out. But so, the movie starts…okay, the movie started a long…forty minutes ago. Eh, probably twenty minutes ago. Okay, so they go in.
There’s this thing about signing the waiver 'cause it’s very…again, I think this is kinda done to be entertaining but it’s like, there’s a lot of stuff you can’t read, et cetera, et cetera. Then a couple of the parents are like, I don't know about this, but the kids are like, dude…he’s like, yeah, if you don’t sign the waiver, you can’t go in the…on the tour. So, they say…most of the kids say, okay, we’re going in. Then they go into a room that keeps getting…a optical illusion hallway, one of those hallways where it’s like, one person standing on one side looks tall; one person does not, and the hallway seems like it’s shrinking. A lot of cool optical…that’s just a cool effect, and then…this is probably…this is the most…in a good way as far as suspension of your disbelief, what type of situation would you want to be in, and a musical number.
So, I think there’s been The Candy Man and Charlie’s mother’s song. I don't know if there was any other songs. Maybe there was…I don't know if…maybe Charlie’s grandfather sang, like, getting up out of bed, dragged a comb across…oh no, that’s…but so, I don't know how many songs there’s been, but this is definitely one of the biggest numbers of the movie. I don't know anything about the history of the song, but it’s definitely been covered a lot of times in a lot of different ways. But so, basically they’re in this hallway, everybody’s bumping into each other, and then I think there’s even a little secret code or a key or something, and then this door opens and it opens into a factory that’s indoor/outdoor. So, it has a conservatory feel.
It does feel like a conservatory, a gigantic…so, it’s very…there’s wrought-iron…this is just what I remember, of course. There’s brown brick, there’s a lot of natural light or seemingly, and the music starts and it’s like…come with me to a world of pure imagination is the song. You start off seeing that, again, Willy Wonka, Gene Wilder’s Willy Wonka, has a bit of an edge. He’s someone that most people would say, I’m not sure about that guy. Especially any kids would be like, yeah, I don't know about that guy. He’s intriguing to me, but yeah, I’m gonna…the kids wouldn’t say no; they’d say, hey, I’m gonna need to hold your hand while we hang out with this Willy Wonka. He definitely seems to not like kids that don’t follow his rules already, 'cause he wants everybody to walk, but no one to walk in front of him.
I just remember that, being like…I don't know, just seeing the strict…and then he lets the kids go, and they get released into this garden, and everything in the garden is edible candies that are also flowers, presumably an illusion somehow, but there’s giant…everything’s edible; tea…edible teacup, flowers, and it really is a wonderland, a world of pure…but it’s not imagination, and it’s…the way the song is sung…I think it is one of the big moments in the movie of why it stayed with me, is…I don't know, it’s just sung in a very deliberate way that’s enjoyable but it has some other elements to it. I don't know if it has any foreboding elements. I would say that just Gene Wilder’s manner as Willy Wonka is foreboding.
But so, basically we get this long sequence of singing and activity and kids eating and frolicking and just eating tons of candy, and the parents or the adult figures reverting, for the most part. So, they’re reverting to a childlike attitude of eating candy and play. Then at some point, the first boy and his mom, they run afoul. I don't know if there was a rule already expressed, 'cause I wasn’t paying attention, but I think it was don’t go anywhere near the river. There’s a chocolate river. Maybe that’s the centerpiece when they walk in. They say, oh yeah, it’s a real river. It helps mix and aerate the chocolate. There’s a chocolate waterfall and…but it’s chocolate to be used in candy, so you can’t touch it. That’s basically the gist of it. But it is a little watery, so it looks like Yoo-hoo, to be honest, and as a kid, I was a big Yoo-hoo fan.
I mean, I would only occasionally have Yoo-hoos, so I think that’s why. Yoo-hoo was not a aspiration…it was another drink I associated with New York City, even though the times I had Yoo-hoo was normally when we’d be in Polaska in New York in the wintertime and there would be a food stand for fisher…winter fishermen, and we would go to it and I would get a Yoo-hoo there. For some reason not a hot chocolate, but a Yoo-hoo. Or I guess that would be the fall, the autumn, which would still be cold. But so, okay, so this kid, Augustus Gloop, he goes and starts drinking…he loves chocolate. That’s his character’s thing. August Gloop; chocolate lover. So, in some sense he may have been Willy Wonka’s greatest fan.
Yeah, 'cause the next person that appreciates candy would be Violet Beauregarde, 'cause Mike Teavee and Veruca Salt, they don’t…I guess Charlie, but Charlie likes…he’s a kid. But so, this Augustus Gloop, he starts drinking out of the chocolate river. He decides to splish, splash, take a bath in there, and basically Willy Wonka says, hey, now you gotta dry off. We can’t have you dripping chocolate everywhere around this place. Also, now you’ve gotten…this is chocolate that was for consumption, so now we’ve gotta deal…it’s not good. I don't know if there was ever a rule expressed, but if you break the rules, you get kicked out. But that’s definitely the case, so…but he says, okay…and this is where at some point…maybe even before this, we meet the Oompa-Loompas who are the people that work for…at Charlie’s chocolate factory.
I don't know when we learn their backstory…or, not Charlie’s; whatever, Wonka’s…Wonka…the…yeah, Wonka Candy Works? I don't know what they call it. But so, we see these Oompa-Loompas. Now, they sing songs which are very catchy, but they also…this is the most set…I mean, one of the things that’s…'cause again, this was already dated when I saw it, but dated in a way that captures an era very clearly and profoundly. So, the Oompa-Loompas have usually…not a animated sequence but kinda like a music video each time, and they sing the moral of the song, which is…that one; don’t…why would you drink out of a chocolate river you’re not supposed to? Why would you take a bath in there? Loompa-dee-doo. I’ve got another lesson for you. What do you get when you do stuff you’re not supposed to?
You will get no…oh, that’s…the Mike Teavee one stuck with me the most 'cause I watched so much TV. Not that I related to Mike Teavee; never liked him. But so, Augustus Gloop and his mom are basically asked to leave, but first they have to get dried off and take…then they’re like, we gotta wash your clothes or give you something else. So, Wonka’s not happy about it, but the kids and everybody, they were just in the middle of this fantastic fantasy…I mean, real-life fantasy sequence. So, they say…that’s the thing that…I don't know. It takes them out of it. Then they say…basically Wonka says, yeah, that’s what happens. You see Wonka’s ice cold, in some sense, a very all-or-nothing…he lacks empathy and compassion, I would say, for the most part.
So, then he says, okay, now we’re gonna go for this boat ride to this other section of the factory or some…I think this is what happens next. Again, setting an era…this boat ride is absolutely bonkers. I know they redid it in the movie in a different way, the new movie, but I do have something else associated with this. So, again, this was the seventies, I think, or maybe it was the late sixties when this movie came out, and it is…they go through a boat ride through a tunnel where it just starts to show all this art you would…that this…these movies on the tunnel wall that kinda create visions for the kids, and it’s very…to say trippy would be…that’s the way you’d describe it, but also in a way that, again, does have some M-E-A-N-A-C-E to it where you’re like, what is…?
This is not what…I mean, this would be the first point other than overall Wonka’s mannerisms…'cause even the Augustus Gloop thing you’d probably write off. You’d be like, well, they did break the rules and it sounds like Wonka’s taking care of them; gonna wash their clothes and then…you’re right, the kid shouldn’t have been messing in the chocolate river. He told us not to. Or, common sense would say if this was chocolate for consumption that you shouldn’t stick your hand in there. But this boat ride…any adult would be like, okay, but…and I think…it’s actually Mike Teavee’s mom, and she actually sometimes is the voice of reason that I’m remembering. Charlie’s dad’s more the voice of caution, or Charlie’s uncle or grandfather, but the mom, Mike Teavee’s mom, she’s the one that actually speaks out.
The other people do, but she more speaks out like, this is so whack. I don't know if this is one of these moments when she does that, but she says…I mean, basically she’s like, this boat ride’s nuts, man. This is just my memory. The other thing I remember about the boat ride was at one point…so, again, you would associate this…this was before 420 was a thing, so I don't know what…I wasn’t alive during the sixties and the seventies. I wasn’t partying like this, so I don’t…I wasn’t even doing it during the eighties. But it’s like, I don't know what kind of partying people did where this would be the boat ride you’d go on, but I do know that at Sylvan Beach when I was a child, they had an indoor Scrambler ride, and the indoor Scrambler ride…so, the Scrambler is a fairly dull ride that you see at a lot of fairs and stuff like that.
It’s just, you sit in these…I went on it once last summer or two summers ago and I said, oh yeah, I don’t like Scramblers. I was a full-fledged adult. But this one at this…Sylvan Beach was just a small amusement park. They figured out…they put the Scrambler indoors and then they had projections like this, and then they would play strobe lights and they would turn the lights out. So, it was a Scrambler for people who were pre-scrambled or kids that were just like, this is…as kids, I never understood it and I didn’t realize that it was marketed towards teens or whatever or young adults, but I did…I said, there’s something about this strangeness, surreality, I guess. I don't know if it’s…any of it’s surreal. I mean, the Oompa-Loompa stuff might be surreal.
But anyway, that type of strange reality…that the two things were very similar. It wasn’t the same projections as Willy Wonka, but it was these kind of projections where you’d say, whoa man. But then occasionally you’d say, whoa man, I don't need to see, whatever, an ant farm. That’s too close, man. I don't…ant farm’s not for me right now. Okay, so, they go on this boat ride. Everyone is like, what the heck? There’s even a close-up because Wonka’s reading a poem while the boat’s going on that’s like…so, his mood…I forgot about this; his mood is where you’re like, what the heck? He kinda goes into this strange poetry fugue state, and there’s different projections on him, or lighting, and it’s very…it’s definitely worth seeing.
It’s not…it’s just off…it’s awesome for the film because it does give the film nuance, in some sense, 'cause you say…I would have probably been like, can we get the heck outta here? What do we get, a lifetime of chocolate? So, just a weird boat ride. Okay, they get off the boat ride and then they start going into different laboratories, the candy laboratories, I think, and I don't ever remember what order they’re in. But some of them that I remember…and this may have been earlier, is lickable wallpaper. So, there’s wallpaper that tastes like different things, kinda like scratch-and-sniff. So, everybody’s like, holy cow, this tastes like banana. Oh yeah, this tastes like mostly positive things, but there’s…I think there’s, yeah, biscuits and…whatever, beans and toast.
So, they go there, then they go to this machine that’s…a lot of…not steampunky, but almost steampunky. So, there’s a super trippy machine that makes steam and weird noises, and that’s producing Everlasting Gobstoppers, which was…I guess…what were they called? It’s candy you put in your mouth that lasts forever. Everybody’s like, this is madness, man. Why would you want to do a candy that will last forever? Wonka says, because I can, or something. I don't know. Says, because I wanted to find out if I could. But he gives each kid a Everlasting Gobstopper. Now, those were different…as a kid…when I was a kid, you could buy Everlasting Gobstoppers. The thing was, they didn’t last forever, but they did, as you sucked on them…they were like…oh, what do you call them? They were like hard…not hard candy.
They have a term. Not-great-for-your-jaws candies. Or there was a album…who…Livy Rodrigo had Sour, but there was somebody else that had a album that was named after this. I don't know who, though. But so, the Gobstoppers when I was a kid, they had a smiley face, but each layer changed colors and flavor, and then you got to a tart center. These ones I don't remember if any kids consumed them, but Charlie puts one in his pocket. Yeah, that was a gift, so that’s…Wonka’s like, this is your gift, one piece of candy that’s gonna last forever, which again is important because basically Slugworth says, if you get me anything outside that factory, especially experimental candy…this is cutting-edge stuff. I’ll pay you a bunch of dough.
Okay, so Charlie does that, then I’m pretty sure the next thing is they go into a room and there’s…this is another experimental room where they’re working on new gum flavors. Now, we’ve already established that Violet Beauregarde is a big gum enthusiast. She is trying to get the world record for gum…chewing one piece of gum. So, this room is the gum experiment…gum labs or something, and apparently they’re working on a new gum that’s a seven-course meal or something. But again, Wonka says, no touching without my permission or something. I don't know. Don’t touch any of this stuff unless I give it to you. But she hears about this gum and basically is like, I’m gonna try it. He says, don’t try it. She says, I gotta try it. He says, it’s experimental.
Then at some point you see again…and I like this one where he’s like, please don’t, please stop. He’s like, I’ve already warned you, so I’m not gonna try to stop you. So, she takes this thing…I think it comes out of another machine that’s shooting steam and stuff like that. Oh, 'cause they’re putting all the ingredients in there. But he says it’s not complete. It hasn’t been…fully worked out all the kinks. So, she turns into a blueberry 'cause blueberry pie is what’s for dessert. But first she goes through all the…it goes fine until dessert. She’s like, oh, this is delicious, roast duck or whatever. Oh, this is nothing more than kids love than a full plate of over-steamed vegetables. But then she gets to the blueberry pie.
She turns into a blueberry and then the Oompa-Loompas come and they sing their song about chewing too much gum or whatever and how there’s a moral. Like, whatever it is; if they said don’t…don’t take the gum, don’t take the gum. So, they take her and her father…'cause they go, we gotta take her down to the…we gotta figure out the…the Juicing Room. We gotta juice her because she’s a blueberry and then she’ll be back to a normal kid again. Her father’s very comedic. His style of character is very put-upon, overwhelmed, semi-neurotic guy. So, he was entertaining to watch having to deal with that situation. Okay, I think that’s who her father was. Okay, so she’s gone.
Then I think at some point in this sequence, there was this other room with Fizzy Lifting Drink, which I guess is another thing Wonka’s working on that can make you float. Maybe everybody gets to try it, but maybe not. Charlie’s grandfather I think is the one who does it, not Charlie. He says, yo, let’s take a swig of this stuff. It’s like, the carbonation makes you burp and every time you burp, you…maybe you hiccup? I don't know. You float. I don't know, maybe burps bring you up and hiccups bring you down or hiccups bring you up and burps bring you down? But they drink this stuff and they start floating to the top of this room that’s kind of like a jet engine testing facility or something where there’s this giant fan at the top. They’re like, oh no, we’re gonna go out the top…it’s not gonna work out great for us.
But then they figure out the burping…they figure out the technique of using it and then they come back down, and somehow they join…rejoin the tour without it getting noticed. I think that’s that whole sequence, right? I can’t remember anything else. So, that’s the Fizzy Lifting Drink sequence. Then…I’m trying to think if I’m missing anything, but I don't think so. Okay, then they go into a room that’s full of geese, and I think they’re making some sort of magical Easter eggs or golden eggs or golden chocolate eggs, and the geese are really cute. This is where Violet or Veruca…so, we’ve…Veruca, she decides she wants…oh wait, so everybody sings a song? Did Violet Beauregarde sing a song, or…? I don't know if they did, but Veruca sings a song and it’s really, really good.
I can’t remember the song right off the top of my head. It’s something about getting my way, basically. ‘Cause she says, I want my own…it’s really good. She takes the petals off a flower…it’s just a really good performance and a good song. It’s just, unfortunately I can’t remember anything…I mean, I remember more the performance. So, she says, I want it now. That’s what it is. I want…yeah, yeah, I want it now. So, she goes…she basically is like, I want one of these geese. They’re like…Wonka’s like, the geese aren’t for sale. They’re special geese to lay chocolate…golden chocolate eggs, and it’s not like I could just come up with new ones. Also, it’s part of my business. Now, Veruca’s part of the serious…she’s not royalty. There’s no royals in this, but there…she’s seriously rich.
Her dad is some sort of industrialist. So he says, just say the word, Wonka. However much, I’ll just pay you. He goes, the geese…again, the geese aren’t for sale. So, she basically sings a song about how she gets what she wants. She gets what she gets…she gets what she wants, but she’s gonna be the one that’s gone. Then she goes down the egg…where the geese lay the eggs, there’s a chute to deliver the eggs to the proper place. Oh no, there’s a place that tests the eggs to make sure they’re right. So, she gets tested and it says…there’s a thing, a scale that weighs the eggs and says, oh, this is the correct…to sort the eggs by grams or something. Whatever, some sort of metric stuff. So, she goes down the chute, so then her dad’s like, where is she?
Oh, also when Wonka wants the Oompa-Loompas and they don’t appear just to sing, he uses a pitch pipe, which I thought was a cool flourish. But so, he calls…yeah, the dad’s like, where is he? Then he uses his pitch pipe and then a Oompa-Loompa calls. He says, where did she go? Goes, oh, the trash facility. The dad says, trash facility? I think the dad ends up jumping in there himself after he’s like, where is she? So, then Wonka goes, go get them. Then at this point, too, Grandpa…what’s his…his name’s not Grandpa Ed; that was my grandpa. But Grandpa…not Grandpa Charlie. I can’t remember the grandpa’s name. Grandpa Joe; he says, yo, what are you doing, man? These are little kids. Wonka’s like, you know what? Mind your P’s and Q’s.
Okay, then there’s a sequence…and I’m pretty sure everybody’s involved that’s left, which is just Mike Teavee, Mike Teavee’s mom, Charlie, and Grandpa…not Grandpa Ed, but Grandpa Joe, and Willy Wonka. But they get…then they go on this wild machine, a foam-producing…I have no idea what the purpose of the machine was, either. They go…it’s very trippy. It’s this giant foam…I guess I don't remember much about it. Seems super high-tech, had a bunch of wheels and moving parts, and it produced tons and tons of copious foam, I guess presumably to clean something? I’m pretty sure, again…this is when Mike Teavee’s mom…she has fun with this. But maybe not. But it does seem like a brief moment of joy where they’re having fun. I can’t really remember anything else about it.
Then there’s a sequence with Mike Teavee where they’re…they go into this serious tech lab where the Oompa-Loompas are actively working on a candy teleportation device. Now, for some reason, I think it’s a future device where it will teleport the candy into your television so you could purchase it and then take the candy out of the TV, 'cause that’s what Willy Wonka does, and it’s a cool effect…but that the sizing’s off and that in order to do that, you need a giant candy bar, 'cause when you transfer it to a regular TV…and these are CR…the old cathode-ray tube TVs. When you do that, then the thing shrinks. But Mike Teavee’s obsessed with TV, so he demands to go on TV and be transferred, like, teleported.
Even though they went through the basics of it, they’re like, yeah, it’s not meant to do that and it’s not meant to…it’s meant to move candy, he says, this is it; I’m Mike Teavee. I’m meant to be a star or whatever. Willy Wonka’s basically like, whatever, man. I’m not gonna argue with you. I’m not sure exactly what I had against Mike Teavee. Maybe he reminded me of somebody, but I definitely…oh, he’s dressed like a cowboy. He’s the most American…he’s just this TV-watching…maybe it was just related too much 'cause I watched so much TV. But so, he gets trans…teleported, 'cause they’re using some sort of TV technology to teleport people, or candy. But he…again, just like the candy bar, he goes from a large size to a small size. So, then he becomes a action-figure-sized kid. Again, this is really stretching the effects.
I haven’t watched the movie in a while, but I’d have to wonder what the…how those effects worked. But his mom’s like…so, then he goes to…we’ll bring him to the taffy-stretching room and we’ll stretch him. That’s the one with the Oompa-Loompa’s song; what do you get when you watch too much TV? A mind full of something and an IQ of three. Then they sing, you’ll get no, you’ll get no, you’ll get no commercials. Those are the lyrics that stuck with me the longest. But yeah, so, what do you call it? So, the Oompa-Loompa’s sing about that, then Mike’s gone. Then this is…what a way to set up the ending of a film, at least in my opinion, that rings true, and I don't know…I don't think this movie’s…I don't know what the critical regard to this film is or the watchability of it 'cause I haven’t really watched it in a long time and it’s mostly steeped in nostalgia.
But basically, then the tour’s over. Again, we see this side of Wonka and he’s ice cold. Basically he says, okay, well, nice giving you the tour, and that’s it, and hope you had fun, and we’ll see you later. They’re like…he literally just ends the tour. This is something I would do, almost, if I…but again, it pays off. He gives this speech where he even reads off the thing, et cetera, et cetera. They say, what’s the problem? Uncle…maybe…is he Uncle Bob? No, that’s not his name. Grandpa Joe says, what in the…? You just brought us through this strange experience and now you’re kicking us outta here and you’re not even gonna…? He literally just sits down in his office. Also, we see that everything in the office, I think, is cut in half. So, it’s just bizarre.
There is this surreality to it there, and he says, did you or did you not take the Fizzy Lifting Drink and touch the walls…and that has to be cleaned and all that, and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. This is a famous repeated line; he goes, good day, sir. Grandpa Joe’s outraged. He’s like, you’re a awful man, basically. He says, I said good day, sir. This is just how I remember it. But he also knows…he’s still testing Charlie, which is what gets paid off, 'cause Charlie’s…he’s looking for someone I guess that’s both assertive and good-hearted. I mean, again, if someone was to test me in this way, I’d say, yeah, I don't think…I don't want the…I don't want it. But I guess I get tested this way a lot with the podcast, but it’s more on a message-to-message thing.
But Grandpa Joe speaks how most people would be feeling, and then Charlie goes to leave and he goes…he realizes he still has the Gobstopper which he could sell to Slugworth, and he’s also ultimately rejecting everything that Willy Wonka kinda stands for, I would think. He gives the Gobstopper back and he says, basically, dude, thanks for the tour, but yeah, I’m not gonna sell this to Slugworth, but also this…your candy and your attitude leave a bad taste in my mouth. Then…and again…well, I do think it’s Gene Wilder. He’s able to change his manner.
He just changes so quickly from this person you would say…I mean, literally you’d be like, I think Uncle…Grandpa Joe said it, almost like your behavior repulses me, Willy Wonka…to this soft-hearted thing where he’s like…and he does it with his eyes, I think, and his smile, but he says, oh, Charlie, I knew you were the one. Then he’s so soft and kind and he’s like, basically, I was…I’ve been looking for someone to take over for me, but someone that’s gonna take care of the Oompa-Loompas, because basically they used to live in some place where people…there was some sort of thing with the wildlife there, and the wildlife and the Oompa-Loompa’s didn’t get along so they had to move here, and whoever takes over for me has gotta work…you know, take care of the Oompa-Loompas, take care of the candy.
I don't know, maybe there could have been a little bit more in the sense of like…and maybe this is what they did in the other movie where it’s like, dude, what is your problem? ‘Cause me just taking over the factory is not gonna change whatever’s going on with you, because Wonka, you need to sit…you need to get somebody…things need to…can’t be happy for you or anyone associated with you when you have these extreme changes in your behavior, but that doesn’t happen. But Charlie…he says, you’re it, Charlie. Then they go in this magical elevator which doesn’t have a lot to do with anything, but I guess it’s part of the books or something. They just get in this magical elevator. I have no…I guess maybe there’s some sort of plot point; I have no idea.
It shoots out of the top of the factory, blows the top of the factory off. Again, this is this beautiful…created and…I’m sure with painting and stuff, factory that has tons of wrought-iron and glass. They shoot out the top and then they’re in some sort of space-age flying device, like a flying elevator. I don't know if that’s one of the books, Charlie and the Flying Elevator. I think it is, and they’re flying over wherever they live, which isn’t London, but…and the good thing is he’s like, you’ll take a salary and…I don't know if they’re gonna live there. I mean, Grandpa Joe’s probably like, dude, I’m here…I’m on Charlie and you like glue now, because…so, that’s basic…those are the basics of what I remember. But we do have a few minutes, so let’s check the songs and let’s see what I got right and what I got wrong here.
W…first of all, is it Willy…Willy Wonka or Willy…that’s not how you spell it. Okay, 1971…I know I checked some of this before, but…it’s a 1971 film. So, yeah, sixties, seventies. I know I read some of this stuff, but let’s go through the songs and the plot. Okay, yeah, it was based on Roald Dahl’s ‘64 book, and it’s been played by…oh, Timothee Chalamet? There’s gonna be another one? Holy cow, that’ll be interesting. Okay, oh, interesting. I wonder who’s directing that. But yeah, portrayed in films multiple times…oh, let’s go straight to the…this movie. ‘71 American musical fantasy film. Mel Stuart, Charlie Bucket, okay…Peter Ostrum…golden…found a golden ticket, gets to visit the thing, and let’s see, Wolper Pictures and Quaker Oats Company were the production companies.
A hundred minutes, budget of $3 million, did $4 at the box office, filmed in Munich. Okay, so, yeah…oh, yeah, we did some of this, The Candy Man…oh yeah, Charlie Bucket…this is all from Wikipedia. Poor paper boy looks inside a candy shop, can’t afford the sweets, then he sees the factory and a tinker tells him nobody goes in and out. Oh, Grandpa Joe tells him that Wonka had shut down the factory 'cause the rival candy places were getting his recipes. It’s still locked. Then Wonka announces he has five golden tickets hidden in candy bars, and they’ll get a factory tour and a lifetime supply of chocolate. Augustus Gloop, Veruca Salt, Violet Beauregarde, and Mike Teavee.
Then, yeah, you see another man whispering to the kids on TV as they win, then they…there’s a fake…somebody that won, and then Charlie gets a bar from Grandpa Joe; it doesn’t have it, then he finds a quarter or whatever and does find…buys a candy bar, gets it. That’s Slugworth who goes up to him, offers him a cash reward. Oh, before the Everlasting Gobstopper. Then he goes home, picks Grandpa Joe, who’s…excitedly jumps out of bed for the first time in twenty years. Then Wonka greets the ticket winners. So, this is all the first episode we did. Chocolate room, a whimsical, indoor park with a river of chocolate and other sweets, and it’s where we see the Oompa-Loompas. Then each child has a flaw which causes them to give in to temptation.
Augustus touches the water, Violet takes the gum, Veruca demands a goose, Mike goes on the TV thing. The Oompa-Loompas sing a song of morality after each child. Charlie and Joe do the Fizzy Lifting Drink. Yeah, so I did…burping allows them to go down. The drink makes them float up. Okay, at the end of the tour he says, yeah, the…oh, don't worry. They say, what about the other kids? He says, they’re fine. Then he retreats to his office without awarding them the lifetime supply of chocolate. When they ask him about it, he informs them they broke the contract, that for stealing Fizzy Lifting Drinks, forfeiting the prize…Charlie returns the Everlasting Gobstopper instead of selling it to Slugworth, and they call Charlie the winner. The offer to buy the Gobstopper was a morality test for the winners.
Only Charlie passed. Then they get in the Wonkavator, a multi-directional glass elevator, and fly out of the factory. Reception; the film received positive…generally positive reviews. Ebert said four out of four stars. Best film of its sort since Wizard of Oz, according to Ebert. Delightfully funny and has a bit of S-C-A-R-Y. Work of imagination. See if we could find this soundtrack. Music…okay, what do we got here? Original score was by Leslie Baracusse and Anthony Newley. Candy Man originally recorded by Sammy Davis Jr…or when it was recorded…re-recorded the song…no, Sammy Davis Junior recorded the song. It became a number-one hit. Let’s see, the twenty-first…so, you got golden…oh, I Got A Golden Ticket; that was another song.
Then, The Candy Man, Charlie’s Paper Run, Cheer up, Charlie, Lucky Charlie, I’ve Got A Golden Ticket, Pure Imagination, Oompa-Loompa, Wondrous Boat Ride, Everlasting Gobstoppers Oompa-Loompa, The Bubble Machine, I Want It Now, Wonkamobile, Wonkavision Oompa-Loompa, and then Wonkavator. Let’s see, what…it’s been referenced in many different TV shows and animated shows, and there’s been a lot of covers of the song, and even…there’s a meme, condescending Wonka. Oh yeah, that’s a famous one where he’s looking at you. I forgot about that one. Tell me again about dipping your elbows in milk. I don't know what he would say, though. I’m not good at writing memes. But it’s the one where his shoulder’s…his elbow’s on something.
He’s staring with that very Gene Wilder smile that says way more than oh, I’m so happy to see you. It says I’m not listening. Casting…trying to think if there’s any notes in casting. Not really. Okay, there’s…Breaker Confections, a subsidiary of Quaker Oats, wanted to…they were like, oh, wait a second, we could do this. They renamed it Willy Wonka Candy Company. It was sold to Nestle at some point, and they bought the rights to the book and financed the picture for promoting the Wonka Bar. Wow. Interesting stuff. Wolper decided with Stuart that the film would be a musical, approached Richard Rogers and Henry Mancini, who declined. Let’s see, Gene Wonka wanted specific changes to Wonka’s costume including trousers and the color and cut of the jacket, placement of the pockets.
Wilder’s attention to detail also requested…the hat is terrific but two inches shorter would make it better. They tried Fred Astaire, Joel Grey, Ron Moody, John Pertwee, Spike Mulligan…Peter Sellers, even, begged for the role. All six members of Monty Python expressed interest in playing Wonka, but they were too…they were deemed not big enough names for international audience. Joel Grey was in the lead, and other people auditioned in New York. By the end of the week, Wilder walked in. It was then that Stuart and producer David L. Wolper realized they could stop looking. The role fit him tighter than one of Jacques Cousteau’s wet suits. They were captivated by Wilder’s humor. His inflection was perfect; sardonic edge, and…they were looking for. Then they tried to hide their eagerness to help in their negotiations.
When Wilder was cast as Wonka, he accepted the role…when I first made first interest, I decided to come out the door carrying a cane and walked towards the crowd with the limp. As the crowd sees this, they all get quiet, and then I roll. So, he wanted to do that thing and have the applause. They said, why? He said…he goes, Wilder answered, from that time on, no one will know if I’m lying or telling the truth. Wilder said he was adamant and he would decline the role otherwise. Jean Stapleton turned down the role of Mrs. Teavee. Jim Backus was considered the role of Sam Beauregarde. Sammy Davis Jr. wanted to be the candy store owner, but he was too big of a star. Let’s see, Anthony Newley also wanted…but he was also too big a star at the time, I guess. Hundreds of children auditioned.
Filming began in ‘70, August of ‘70, and ended in November of ‘70. They found a Guinness brewery in Ireland, a chocolate factory in Spain, and a massive chocolate room at Barvaria Studios, but then also shooting locations in Munich and Bavaria. External shots in, yeah, Munich. Yeah. So, there’s a lot more about it, but…yeah, it’s a interesting movie, and I guess even more interesting that it took me two hours to try to remember it. But yeah, goodnight. Thanks, and goodnight, everybody.
[END OF RECORDING]
(Transcribed by Leah Hervoly)
-
Tale of the Tape
British Currency
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2016/06/a-short-history-of-the-british-pound/
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-26169070
https://www.historic-uk.com/HistoryUK/HistoryofBritain/Decimalisation-in-Britain/
Trompe L’Oeil
https://www.artandobject.com/news/fooling-eye-trompe-loeil-art-history
https://www.dailyartmagazine.com/trompe-loeil/
https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20221116-trompe-loeil-and-the-paintings-that-deceive-our-eye
Pure Imagination
https://americansongwriter.com/who-wrote-the-candy-coated-fantasy-song-pure-imagination/
https://www.mtishows.com/news/remembering-the-pure-imagination-of-leslie-bricusse
The Tunnel Scene
DOWN TO BUSINESS
I’m no wonk
Deep Dark Night United
Liz, Charlotte (Premium Music Service Question)
PLUGS
WGA / SAG-AFTRA Strike Support; Orlando Park Stop / Trevor Project; Patreon; SleepPhones; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline
SPONSORS
Odoo; Polysleep; Helix Sleep; Progressive; Zoc Doc
INTRO
Sometimes it’s thoughts, sometimes it’s THOTs
It’s time to feel!
Shoutout to the 3rd shift
4th Shift in 4D
Someone out there in the community can relate to how you feel
Elevated Background Noise
Things associated with jingling
I’d say I’m sub background noise, but I don’t know if that’s a thing
I’m counting my ha’pennys
Is a Wheat Penny a thing?
Hey! Penny!
This podcast is mostly just undeveloped jokes
An out-of-focus picture that you don’t need to know what it is
The Incoherent Rambler
My magic show would just be stuffing kerchiefs
Herchiefs
My Magic Checklist
Mixing up my rabbit shopping checklist with my magic checklist
Magic: ?
This intro is not concise
I’ve never done the same intro twice
We’re happy for those sleeping partners out there
Slowly Lowering the Volume on the Day
Continuing our Wonka chat
STORY
Part 2 of Tale of the Tape
I barely got to the movie last time
Explaining Tale of the Tape
The chocolate factory, shrouded in mystery
So many secret methods of producing chocolate
I’m not sure how they established that he was looking for an heir
I don’t think I’ve actually seen John August’s version
I think Christopher Lee is in it?
Slugworth! I just remembered that!
It’s basically industrial espionage
Of course Charlie’s family could use Slugworth’s money
This factory access is a big deal worldwide
A Clockwork Animated Show
A Series of Scenes vs a Coherent Movie
They have to sign a really long waiver
An optical illusion hallway
Time for “Pure Imagination”
This factory feels like a conservatory
This Wonka has a bit of an edge
The first boy runs afoul
I’m not sure if they say don’t go in the Chocolate River
The chocolate river helps to aerate the chocolate
I was a big Yoohoo fan as a kid
I associate Yoohoo with NY
A really inane Yoohoo tangent
Augustus Gloop, chocolate lover
Was Augustus Wonka’s #1 fan?
He decides to splish splash take a bath
Maybe before this we meet the Ooma Loompas?
This movie is dated in a very specific way
Singing Moralizing Songs
I’ve never related to Mike Teevee
Wonka is ice cold re: Augustus
This boat ride is absolutely bonkers
Very trippy art with some M-E-N-A-C-E
This boat ride should’ve been a big red flag to the adults
Mike Teevee’s mom is really the voice of reason
This was before 420 was a thing
The Indoor Scrambler ride at Sylvan Beach from my childhood
I didn’t realize people might be going there under the influence
Whoa man, I don’t need to be this close to an ant farm
Wonka is reading a wild poem
A strange poetry fugue state
The everlasting gobstopper machine
Each kid gets an everlasting gobstopper
The real world gobstopper didn’t last forever
Not Great For Your Jaws Candy
Slugworth would pay top dollar for this experimental candy
The Experimental Gum Room
Violet loves gum
7-course meal gum
She eats the blueberry one and turns into a blueberry
The moral: Don’t eat gum!
They’ve got to juice her
Violet’s father is very put-upon and entertaining
Fizzy Lifting Drink
I can’t remember if everyone tries this
The carbonation makes them float
Burps bring you up and hiccups bring you down (or vice versa)
Flying in a jet engine testing facility
Charlie and Grandpa successfully rejoin the tour
Next is the Geese Room
Looking for Golden Eggs of some kind
The geese are very kind
Did Violet sing a song?
Veruca sings a really excellent song
Veruca wants a chocolate egg
Veruca is very rich
The geese aren’t for sale
Veruca is tested on the scale and comes out as a Bad Egg
Wonka uses a pitch pipe to summon the Ooma Loompas
Veruca is in the trash facility
Her dad jumps down the trash chute to get to her
Grandpa Joe is dismayed by Wonka’s actions
A wild foam sequence I don’t remember a lot
A serious tech lab
Candy teleportation device
Transferring candy to the TV
An Ol’ CRT TV
Mike Teevee demands to be transferred into TV
Action-Figure Sized Kid (AFSK)
They’ll take him to the Taffy-Stretching Room
Only Charlie remains
What a way to set up the ending
Wonka abruptly ends the tour
Good Day Sir!
Wonka is still testing Charlie
I don’t think I would’ve passed Wonka’s test
Grandpa Joe lays into Wonka
Charlie realizes he still has the gobstopper
He returns the gobstopper to Wonka
Charlie politely declines
The magic of Gene Wilder
His twinkling eyes and smile
It would be nice to examine what Wonka’s problem is
Wonka chooses Charlie as his heir
Then they get in a magical elevator
It blows through the top of the factory
A Space-Age Flying Device
Alright let’s double check my summary
1971 release
The book came out in 1964
There’s gonna be another one with Timothee Chalamet??
Oh, Slugworth, specifically wants the Everlasting Gobstopper
Each child has a flaw that causes them to give into temptation
Wonka rescinds his offer because they drank the fizzy lifting drink
The everlasting gobstopper was a morality test
Roger Ebert said it was the best of its kind since Wizard of Oz
Soundtrack Summary
The Condescending Wonka Meme
The casting journey
The Wonka cane rolling story was Wilder’s idea
No one would know if Wonka was lying or telling the truth
A very interesting movie
PATREON THANKS
Joe, Owen, Megan, Julia, Victoria, Melanie, Aaliyah, Susan, Natalie, Sheila, Ray, Beth, Hawa, Stephanie, Jason, Jeanie, Bellamy, XP, Mary, Kate, Elise, Marley, AP, LL, Cindy, Tamar, Matt, Katherine, Jeremy, Meghan, Toby, Terry, Chad
SUMMARY:
Episode: 1,189
Title: Charlie and Wonka and the Tale of the Tape Part 2
Deep Dark Night United: Liz, Charlotte (Premium Music Service Question)
Plugs: WGA / SAG-AFTRA Strike Support; Orlando Park Stop / Trevor Project; Patreon; SleepPhones; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline
Sponsors: Odoo; Polysleep; Helix Sleep; Progressive; Zoc Doc
Patreon Thanks: Joe, Owen, Megan, Julia, Victoria, Melanie, Aaliyah, Susan, Natalie, Sheila, Ray, Beth, Hawa, Stephanie, Jason, Jeanie, Bellamy, XP, Mary, Kate, Elise, Marley, AP, LL, Cindy, Tamar, Matt, Katherine, Jeremy, Meghan, Toby, Terry, Chad
Notable Language:
- Wonk
- 4th Shift in 4D
- Elevated Background Noise
- Wheat Penny
- Hey! Penny!
- The Incoherent Rambler
- Herchiefs
- Slugworth
- Series of Scenes
- Optical Illusion Hallway
- M-E-N-A-C-E
- Surreality
- A strange poetry fugue state
- Action-Figure Sized Kid (AFSK)
- Taffy-Stretching Room
- Good Day Sir!
Notable Culture:
- Wonka
- Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
- Charlie & The Chocolate Factory
- The Big Bang Theory
- Third Rock of the Sun
-
- John Laroquette
- John Lovitz
- John Lithgow
- Christopher Lee
- “A Day In The Life” – The Beatles
- “Pure Imagination” song
- Yoohoo
- Gene Wilder
- Charlie & The Great Glass Elevator
- The Wizard of Oz
- Roger Ebert
- Sammy Davis Jr.
- Jacques Cousteau
Notable Talking Points:
- Sometimes it’s thoughts, sometimes it’s THOTs
- It’s time to feel!
- Shoutout to the 3rd shift
- 4th Shift in 4D
- Someone out there in the community can relate to how you feel
- Elevated Background Noise
- Things associated with jingling
- I’d say I’m sub background noise, but I don’t know if that’s a thing
- I’m counting my ha’pennys
- Is a Wheat Penny a thing?
- Hey! Penny!
- This podcast is mostly just undeveloped jokes
- An out-of-focus picture that you don’t need to know what it is
- The Incoherent Rambler
- My magic show would just be stuffing kerchiefs
- Herchiefs
- My Magic Checklist
- Mixing up my rabbit shopping checklist with my magic checklist
- Magic: ?
- This intro is not concise
- I’ve never done the same intro twice
- We’re happy for those sleeping partners out there
- Slowly Lowering the Volume on the Day
- Continuing our Wonka chat
- Part 2 of Tale of the Tape
- I barely got to the movie last time
- Explaining Tale of the Tape
- The chocolate factory, shrouded in mystery
- So many secret methods of producing chocolate
- I’m not sure how they established that he was looking for an heir
- I don’t think I’ve actually seen John August’s version
- I think Christopher Lee is in it?
- Slugworth! I just remembered that!
- It’s basically industrial espionage
- Of course Charlie’s family could use Slugworth’s money
- This factory access is a big deal worldwide
- A Clockwork Animated Show
- A Series of Scenes vs a Coherent Movie
- They have to sign a really long waiver
- An optical illusion hallway
- Time for “Pure Imagination”
- This factory feels like a conservatory
- This Wonka has a bit of an edge
- The first boy runs afoul
- I’m not sure if they say don’t go in the Chocolate River
- The chocolate river helps to aerate the chocolate
- I was a big Yoohoo fan as a kid
- I associate Yoohoo with NY
- A really inane Yoohoo tangent
- Augustus Gloop, chocolate lover
- Was Augustus Wonka’s #1 fan?
- He decides to splish splash take a bath
- Maybe before this we meet the Ooma Loompas?
- This movie is dated in a very specific way
- Singing Moralizing Songs
- I’ve never related to Mike Teevee
- Wonka is ice cold re: Augustus
- This boat ride is absolutely bonkers
- Very trippy art with some M-E-N-A-C-E
- This boat ride should’ve been a big red flag to the adults
- Mike Teevee’s mom is really the voice of reason
- This was before 420 was a thing
- The Indoor Scrambler ride at Sylvan Beach from my childhood
- I didn’t realize people might be going there under the influence
- Whoa man, I don’t need to be this close to an ant farm
- Wonka is reading a wild poem
- A strange poetry fugue state
- The everlasting gobstopper machine
- Each kid gets an everlasting gobstopper
- The real world gobstopper didn’t last forever
- Not Great For Your Jaws Candy
- Slugworth would pay top dollar for this experimental candy
- The Experimental Gum Room
- Violet loves gum
- 7-course meal gum
- She eats the blueberry one and turns into a blueberry
- The moral: Don’t eat gum!
- They’ve got to juice her
- Violet’s father is very put-upon and entertaining
- Fizzy Lifting Drink
- I can’t remember if everyone tries this
- The carbonation makes them float
- Burps bring you up and hiccups bring you down (or vice versa)
- Flying in a jet engine testing facility
- Charlie and Grandpa successfully rejoin the tour
- Next is the Geese Room
- Looking for Golden Eggs of some kind
- The geese are very kind
- Did Violet sing a song?
- Veruca sings a really excellent song
- Veruca wants a chocolate egg
- Veruca is very rich
- The geese aren’t for sale
- Veruca is tested on the scale and comes out as a Bad Egg
- Wonka uses a pitch pipe to summon the Ooma Loompas
- Veruca is in the trash facility
- Her dad jumps down the trash chute to get to her
- Grandpa Joe is dismayed by Wonka’s actions
- A wild foam sequence I don’t remember a lot
- A serious tech lab
- Candy teleportation device
- Transferring candy to the TV
- An Ol’ CRT TV
- Mike Teevee demands to be transferred into TV
- Action-Figure Sized Kid (AFSK)
- They’ll take him to the Taffy-Stretching Room
- Only Charlie remains
- What a way to set up the ending
- Wonka abruptly ends the tour
- Good Day Sir!
- Wonka is still testing Charlie
- I don’t think I would’ve passed Wonka’s test
- Grandpa Joe lays into Wonka
- Charlie realizes he still has the gobstopper
- He returns the gobstopper to Wonka
- Charlie politely declines
- The magic of Gene Wilder
- His twinkling eyes and smile
- It would be nice to examine what Wonka’s problem is
- Wonka chooses Charlie as his heir
- Then they get in a magical elevator
- It blows through the top of the factory
- A Space-Age Flying Device
- Alright let’s double check my summary
- 1971 release
- The book came out in 1964
- There’s gonna be another one with Timothee Chalamet??
- Oh, Slugworth, specifically wants the Everlasting Gobstopper
- Each child has a flaw that causes them to give into temptation
- Wonka rescinds his offer because they drank the fizzy lifting drink
- The everlasting gobstopper was a morality test
- Roger Ebert said it was the best of its kind since Wizard of Oz
- Soundtrack Summary
- The Condescending Wonka Meme
- The casting journey
- The Wonka cane rolling story was Wilder’s idea
- No one would know if Wonka was lying or telling the truth
- A very interesting movie