1149 – Tournament of Bands | Make Great Pets Ep4

Episode 1149 – Tournament of Bands | Make Great Pets Ep4

[START OF RECORDING]

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, whether you have a pet or you’ve…whether…you know, whether you’ve had a pet rock or not, or you say I don’t even…or you found a painted rock, you paint rocks, you see rocks, you listen to rocks, or you just like the sound of…like…I don't know who doesn’t like find…I mean, I guess there’s times you wouldn’t want to find a painted rock, ‘cause people hide painted rocks a bit like a Geocache. But what is…? You say, did I tune into the Rolling Rock Cast? I say no, but if…is there a podcast about rolling rocks? ‘Cause I’d like to know more…is that a…?

‘Cause that sounds somewhat soothing, except…well, skipping rocks…if you’ve ever wished there was a podcast where a person just skipped rocks and talked, this one…this may be your show, ‘cause they’re skip…there’s somebody up in…upstairs in my brain skipping rocks. Then someone just said, and you’re a few short…rocks short of a skip…of skipping rocks. I say, correct ‘em…correct, or as the Fonz would say, correctamundo, or as…skiparockamuno. Skiparock…skippo. If you’re confused, though, you might be in the right place. It’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that’s here to put you to sleep, keep you company, take your mind off of stuff whether you listen or not, whether you’re awake or asleep. No pressure to fall asleep. We’ll be here over an hour. This is a different…very different podcast.

It does take some getting used to, but it’s free and it’s kind-hearted. What we’ll have is some support for the show — that’s how it comes out free — then a long, meandering intro where I over-explain what I’m already over-explaining now. You’d say, now I know someone other than Charlie Brown who…on the times where you go for…trick-or-treating…someone else I may give…and I say great, that would…if it’s a rock I could skip or roll or paint, which it could be…anyway, it’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that’s here to keep you company and put you to sleep. Thanks for coming by and thanks for making it possible, my patron peeps.

INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do or alls you could do…or you could…you may metaphorically do…all you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake, whether it’s thoughts about the past, the present, the future that are coming up or have been there all day long, it could be feelings; maybe the feelings are related to the thoughts or maybe the feelings…physical sensations, it could be changes in time, temperature, routine, you could be anticipating something or just going through something or just getting over something, or it might be something else.

Whatever it is, I’m here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep. That’s the main reason I make the show, so you could fall asleep, because you deserve a good night’s sleep. You deserve a place you can rest, a bedtime you don’t have to dread, a bedtime you could feel neutral about or maybe even look forward to. Maybe this podcast could be a part of something…you say well, it’s not too bad. I got that bore-guy. He talks about nothing, but it’s kinda some…it’s kinda something when he talks about nothing. He’s kinda…but he’s…and he’s not even good about talking about nothing ‘cause he’s talking about something, but it all adds up to nothing. There’s a song like that somewhere in there, but you don’t…you say Scoots, I’d prefer not to dance with you.

I’d prefer to watch you dance around…song lyrics and nothing…and your ability to not be something. So, you…but oh, by the way, something important…the only thing important is you getting the sleep you need and the rest you need for your life to be more manageable. Ideally, you start getting the rest you need on a regular basis. Your relationship with bedtime changes most of the time. Not all of the time, but most of the time. You could be out there flourishing in the world, and that means our world will be a better place. The other reason I make the show and a lot of listeners — regular listeners — are probably starting to nod their heads…ideally ‘cause they’re nodding off, but if they’re not, it’s because a lot of us have been there in the deep, dark night.

I kinda talked about some stuff that might be keeping you up, but it could be something else. It might not be something I’ve gone through personally, but I might be able to relate to the…I’m pretty confident there’s at least one of the feelings there that I could relate to that…I’ve had similar feelings. But if I can’t, there’s someone listening, I guarantee it, who can and who says yeah, that’s tough, and not being able to sleep on top of it. So, that’s why we make the show, kind of, ‘cause the show wouldn’t exist without the listeners who support it, anyway, because we’re here because we know what it feels like and we want to help. So, what I’ll do is I’m gonna send my voice across the deep, dark night, and I’m gonna go on…lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones; that’s how my voice sounds.

I’ll go on superfluous…what are they called? Pointless meanders and superfluous tangents, which you’ve kinda already seen a few of those. Means I’ll get mixed up, I’ll go off topic, I’ll repeat myself, then I’ll say, was I talking about skipping rocks or painting rocks before? Do rocks…? Here’s a question…never came up on the podcast that I know about and I guess it’s…you’d say, definitely…but do rocks need primer? I’ll rephrase the question; that was just an efficient way to say it. Is painting rocks best when rocks are primed? Has anyone ever asked a rock, are you primed to be painted? I mean, I know rocks can’t respond that we…that I know of. I mean, unless they’re in a movie or something. But if you’re painting rocks and you’re priming them…by the way, go for it.

I mean, I…maybe…I’ve always wondered, how did they get that rock so shiny? What kind of paint is this on here? These are the rocks in my mind, of course, the imaginary rocks in my mind. But if you do…if you’re involved in any of these activities, say hey, are you primed to be painted or what? I’d love it if a rock said I’m primed to be painted. I feel a need, a need to be painted indeed, but first, please prime me, if you please, for I’ll be more shiny when someone goes and finds me when they’re…they have to bend down, maybe even dig around and go on their knees. A primed rock is primed to be painted, indeed, and Scoots is not a rhymer. It’s clear to see. Those are pointless meanders and superfluous tangents. Now, what do you need to know about the show?

One, if you’re having an objection or strong feelings or doubts about this podcast, you’re in good company ‘cause that’s the way most people react to the show, and why wouldn’t you? If you’re like me or the hundreds of thousands of people listening right now, you probably tried a bunch of different stuff, right? You said oh boy, that worked once, or yeah, warm…I mean, how much warm milk can one person drink? Am I right? Some people might say zero. I’d say yeah, so that’s out, or a hot…you say okay, I can’t do…you can’t…how much calm breathing can one person handle? I’m laughing because I say…my brain…my…what is that called? My brain stem said more; I could handle more. I’d say yeah, of course you could. Of course you could handle more calm breathing. Love it so much.

So, if you’re here and you’re doubtful, that’s…skeptical, that’s a normal way to get to the show. Now, you may already loathe me and the podcast, and I would say maybe stick around because most regular listeners who pay to listen to the free podcast or support it said it took two or three tries for me to get used to the show. But there are people that are…incredibly strong feeling about the podcast right away, and they let me know about it. You don’t need to let me know about it because there’s a website for you; sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou. There’s tons of other sleepy stuff on there. I’d rather you find that stuff and you still get the rest you need. It doesn’t change the fact if you like me or not that you deserve a good night’s sleep or you…the podcast doesn’t work for you.

There’s still good…you still deserve good stuff. If you’re a rock, you…maybe you don’t always need to be primed, but maybe that was my problem with all the imaginary rock-painting I’ve never done. But I say, my paint always looks…they say well, first of all, I used watercolors. I say well, that’s what I had on-hand. They say, would it have made a diff…? Well, if you primed it…here’s a interesting…let’s just get…lean into this a little bit more. There’s a part of my brain right now, while I’m trying to help you, that’s criticizing my imaginary rock-painting. I don't know if you have a part of your brain like that, but I don't know if you just heard that. It was subtle, but we were going on a tangent about painting rocks and it said you’re doing it wrong.

I said, making a horribly tangential metaphor about painting rocks and how it somehow relates to a sleep podcast eight minutes into an intro, and you’re gonna point out that I’m painting…imaginarily, metaphorically, imaginarily painting rocks, but that I’ve procrastinated on imaginarily painting. No wonder. Why wouldn’t I not…? You say, so this is where we hug that part of us. I say, I love it. I love how you’re pointing that…you’re right, I should prime…I wish I didn’t…well, maybe I could use watercolors on some and prime some and paint some, or maybe I should start with just putting people to sleep. So, okay, so if the show isn’t for you, give it a few tries, see how it goes. What else do you need to know? This is a podcast you don’t really listen to.

You may have already figured that out already but if you haven’t, you can kinda barely listen. Now, if you can’t sleep or you need a break during the day, I’m here to the very end ‘cause there are a percentage of listeners who can’t sleep at all. But you don’t need to listen to me. You could…I mean, it’s a podcast, so you could always listen to it again. I’m not gonna say anything super important, and even if I say something…like, twenty episodes from now, I’ll be like huh, I’ve never talked about priming rocks before. Then I’ll say, this early in this podcast. I’ll say, you know, primer…so, it’s not…this is not ground…I mean, it is groundbreaking ‘cause I’ve never heard anybody talk about priming rocks. But it’s groundbreaking in a way…I’d say well, that’s nice.

Scoots has broken new ground in imaginarily painting rocks and working with his internal rock-painting critic. But yeah, I think I’ll fall asleep. So, it’s a podcast you don’t really need to listen to. Also, no pressure to fall asleep. I actually don’t put you to sleep; I keep you company and take your mind off of stuff while you fall asleep, just like a friend in the deep, dark night. That’s what I…role I apply to fill; bore-friend, bore-bae, bore-sib, bore-bud, bore-bestie, neigh-bore, bore-bor, bore-bruh, bore-best…did I say…? Yeah, bore-friend. I’m here to be your friend in the deep, dark night, keep you company while you drift off. Structurally, that’s the other thing that throws people off sometimes. The show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, then I talk about something.

So you say…maybe you feel seen, maybe you feel welcome, maybe you say this is a little bit silly; I’ll check it out. Maybe feel like I could lower my guard a little bit. I’m not asking to put your guard down, because I’m a human, man. Holy cow. Humanity; I’ve got it. I’ve had a…I’ve got more than my share. So, just kinda see how it goes. But that’s what the intro does. Then there’s support for the show so…‘cause we make about, I don't know, ninety, eighty, a hundred episodes a year. It takes a lot of work, and that support, the sponsors and the listeners who support the show, make that possible. Then there’s support for listeners who are having a hard time, there’s support for communities around the show, then there’s the intro, which we’re just towards the end of. The intro is where I introduce the podcast.

It takes me between ten and fifteen minutes. Sometimes it takes me sixteen, sometimes it takes me nineteen or twenty, eighteen, seventeen, eleven. I don't know if I’ve gotten it under nine in a long time. But you say, why do you ineffectively introduce the podcast every time? I say well, just natural skill. I mean, how could you not think about…? I mean, that’s just me and why I’m made to put people to sleep. I say, how could I not keep talking about priming rocks and talking to rocks about being prime? ‘Cause there’s so…you say man, you’re so prime. I’m gonna prime you. I’m gonna prime a prime number of rocks on a…on Prime Day. Then I’m gonna order…the paint I ordered the previous Prime Day. Hopefully that’s…that day…I’m assuming those days are prime day…anyway. I don’t…yeah.

Then you say, you don’t know…you wouldn’t know a prime number from a prime rock. I’d say, you’re right. But what was my point? Bore-friend, bore…oh, why does the intro go on and on and on? But for the regular listener…the new listener, you get a taste of what the podcast is gonna be like, but for the regular listener, the podcast, for most listeners, is the way they ease into bedtime either as part of their wind-down routine, getting ready for bed and prepped for bed, or in bed getting comfortable. There are listeners that fall asleep, there are listeners that skip the intro, there are listeners that only listen to the epi…intro. There’s a small percentage of listeners that listen all night long, and there’s people that listen to the show in bits. So, there’s no wrong way to listen to the show.

But for most listeners and from the research about sleep, it’s like easing you into bedtime, having a wind-down period, a twilight period is what works most of the time. So, that’s what the intro does. Now, if you’re asleep, that’s great, or you fall asleep during the intro, that’s great. If you can’t sleep, I’m here to keep you company. So, that’s the intro, then there’s support between the intro and the story, again, so the show could be free and come out regularly. Then there will be a story. Tonight will be our episodically modular series, Make Great Pets, about…not about great pets in history but about great…pets…it’s actually not about pets doing great things, but that’s just the…originally it was the working title ‘cause I couldn’t think…I said, does this describe what it is in a really effective way? I say well, it’s to put people to sleep anyway and it sounds nice, and it kinda sums up what’s happening.

So, yeah, Make Great Pets. It was influenced by the song where there’s a chorus; we’ll make great pets. It has nothing to do with what the song’s like, unless the song was fictionally reinvented in my imagination, because…but it’s about nice things happening because of pets, because pets are so nice. That part is 100% accurate. Yeah, but not ironic, I guess is what I’m trying to say. So, that’s…that’ll be our bedtime story, then there’s some thank-yous at the end. So, this is a podcast here to keep you company if you can’t sleep and to keep you company if you’re asleep and you’re not listening, and it does take some getting used to, but I hope it helps you, really, because I’ve been there. I really appreciate you coming by. I work really hard on this show — so do a bunch of other people — and I really yearn and I strive, and I really hope I can help you fall asleep, so thanks again one more time for coming by, and here’s a couple ways I’m able to do it for you for free twice a week.

Alright, Scoots here. It’s time for our episodically modular series. Make Great Pets, I guess, is the initial name of it. It’s a story about…it’s a episodically modular series about…we all knew pets are great, pets make us great, or better. You say wow, great. It’s great to have pets. Not always easy. It’s got its…just making sure if my pets are listening…or all pets are listening. You know, all those pets that are listening; you’re the best, pets. But the question is…comes up rarely except in a sleep podcast…well, why do pets make us so great? What’s going on there? This series does not exactly answer that, but it could answer it. It’s episodically modular, so you can listen to these in any order. The lead character Rin’s gonna catch you up. It’s just a tale about great…how do pets help us…you know, it’s great. It’s so snoozy, really.

Go in any order…the main character is Rin, and Rin keeps a audio journal — so convenient for this podcast — about helping people as a pet. The rest will be explained. But you know, there’s one thing beyond explanation, beyond my understanding; the charm, the charisma…when someone’s just being themselves, and you say, where did you get that charm and charisma? I don't know what you mean. I’m just being me. Ha, ha, ha. You say, how do you stay so charming when you drive up from Los Angeles, you happen to hit ten hours of traffic total, which would have been a six or a five-hour drive, you say…I say well, can you wait in your car for another…? You say please, Scooter, come…let me…and I say no, I was just kidding. I was just testing your charm and patience and charisma.

Then you come in and you make my day, really, with…that’s the thing. Beyond…it’s not the circumstances; it’s the glow within him, and that’s why he’s perfect for setting up a podcast to put people to sleep, right in the middle. You really are the cream…I mean, you’re not the cream of the crop; you’re the cream in the middle of the cookie, in this case. Really? I didn’t even thought…have I never…I’ve never called you the sand…the cream of the…cream of the sandwich cream…you know. But without…if there was one where you go to a bakery where they say, we have bespoke sandwich cookies or whatever…we make them fresh. Mr. Antonio Banderas. Ah, the ladies, the gentlemen, the boys, the girls, the friends beyond the binary, it’s time to pet your pets, to appreciate them.

It’s time, if you so choose, to cuddle with them or to think of them in a cuddling manner. It’s time for Make Great Pets. Meow. Oh, by the way, speaking of meows, Antonio’s got a movie in the theatre when I’m recording this. Probably will be…I think it’s…I gotta check the release date, but it’ll be after this came out. So, check it on streaming. Not sure if you have a…he does…he’s shrugging. You know, he doesn’t come here for…what are these called?

Promos or…? Not a promo, but when you do that in…he’s not here for that, but he is…I hope you did voice…I say, what…they didn’t replace you, right? Anyway, that’s Mr. Antonio Banderas. Either he’s saying move along because he was some…or he just doesn’t want me to promote something for free for him. But you could look on IM…if you need it…if you want to sigh, just look up Antonio Banderas on IMDB, and you’ll sigh in a good way. Oh boy, will you. That’s a guarantee. Here’s another guarantee; we’re about to start our episodically modular series, Make Great Pets.

Hey everybody, this is Rin here. If you’re just listening to this recording first, this is a training log of…I won't be able to explain it if for some reason you’re digging into archives. You’ll have to do a little bit more work, because this is for people already in some sort of training process, so you have a little bit of info, but I’m gonna give you more. So, you’ll be…actually, if you’re just listening to this and you have no information, you just discovered it…Rin: audio log. Nice to meet you. Or Rin, working…I guess I’m maybe your predecessor, but we could be working in parallel. I’m part of a new program, or what I’ve been told is a new program. I don’t have any reason not to believe that other than my natural skepticism that I have sometimes. It’s a — what I’ve heard called recently — big…post…a big farm program.

So, as…after your post-Earthly existence, you may move onto some sort of new experience. This is one of these new experiences you can move on to. The what and why of that is not part of the training. I mean, it may come up as you’re trying to rest. So, this program was meant to replace various programs on various versions…I’m also assuming you’re a…you were…before your big farm — you may know what that is — you were a human being at one point or a spiritual being trying to be human. Whatever they say. So, you may be familiar with some of these things I’m referencing. If not, you might have a little more work to do. So, once upon a time, there was a…oh, here’s the other thing; this may…I guess if you’ve already moved onto a new stage of existence, it shouldn’t totally blow your mind.

I mean, especially when you’re like wow, some of the parts of that movie Beetlejuice were pretty accurate. But so, what was I saying? So, there’s been various versions of Earth all in…the parallel and the alternative…that kinda stuff. I’m not a person…I just know from what I’ve been told, once upon a time there was one version of Earth that had guardian winged, robed beings, and they were supposed to help. There was…oh, you could go…after your post-Earth thing, you would go oh, you could come up here. It’s very…it’s got clouds, it’s got rainbows, buffets, all that kinda stuff. Music, you could play the harp, you could listen to the harp, and so much more, or you could go down here and…remember the parts of your job you didn’t like? You’ll be doing a lot of that down here. So…these are myths, by the way.

I’m not a historian. But they said hey, let’s send some of these winged, robed people down there to help people so they make…so…we don’t want anybody having to do spreadsheets or filing or stapling or pushing…there’s people that had to roll a rock up and down a hill, I’ve heard. So, they had this guard…they called it the guardian angel system. That was going okay. It wasn’t perfect. That was disrupted, and at some point there was this Besos-Penney…what is it? Sears-Besos-Penney incident. They do…some people do refer it that way. Usually it’s not so clinical. They’re saying things and muttering. That kinda disrupted that one, and a second one where they said hey, what if we send someone from…that’s been down filing who says well, I know what I did to get up…when I have a frowny face.

Let me go up there and tell them to make a better choice. Trust me, I won't try to enjoy my…trust me even though you’ve been making me file…roll this rock for four thousand years. I promise I’ll totally help these people out. I won't go…try to drink some cool water or have fresh fruit or…you know. That didn’t work. It turns out…you could read…so, that disrupted those two. Then trying to fix that permanently put a wedge in the idea of the guardian angel system. I guess…again, I don't know the layers above me, but what…whomever is go…they said there’s not a…here’s one thing; I do…I’m pretty sure I know because otherwise why would they have me do my job? Not an unlimited number of Earths, as you know. Also, you might say how come Earth’s so important?

I’d say, no…I think there’s…it’s probably not unlimited resources. Earth’s not the only thing. It’s just what I’m familiar with. So, don’t make a inference from my perspective. There’s probably Zeton, Cupi…Cubi-Zobor, and their people…I don't know. They probably have their own system. I would think they would say well, if this is working on Zpon…Zpor 4 or whatever, why don’t we try it on Earth? Maybe that’s where this program came from. So, the program I’m a part of, which is new when I’m starting this…they said okay, guardian grouches didn’t work. Guardian winged, ethereal beings didn’t work. Let’s try something else, or we need to try something else.

Maybe they did some blue-skied brainstorming, and they came up with a pretty…’cause I think…here’s something you might not know, and this is just a theory; turns out even when you change existences, we take some of our fallibility with us. So, I’m not perfect, which is pretty good to know, and I guess…so, that was one of the things they learned. They said oh, you can’t have…maybe you can’t have all these…you can’t make someone into a demi-god that’s fallible and expect them not to say oops, did I just smote gumdrops off the…? They’re gone out of existence. That was a mistake. They say, are you sure it was a mistake? You always had something against gumdrops. No, no, it’s totally a mistake. I was trying to move a gumball.

So, if you’re fallible, you might…and you might say…and if they…even if they interview you, you say well, I don't know if…why…I thought I was…I don't know. So, maybe having limited powers or barely any powers is the way they’re going now. That’s a long way of saying I’m inside a pet. I don't know if I’ve done this much explaining before, or this way. Every time, it’s new to me. So, there’s no…at least at this stage in the training, because I’m recording at night inside the subconscious of a pet, if there is one…once a pet goes to sleep at night, I wake here and I’m able to…I’m not able to go anywhere ‘cause I’m kind of in a boring dream state. In this particular case, a lot of carrot-munching is going on, and petting, of course. You say, you want to make a pet’s dream come true?

In this particular case, pet me and give me some carrots, and…oh, speak to me in a…that cutie voice. I like it. But so, I’ll record my day as I’ve seen it. I don't know, I just feel like…just in case, I wanted to explain all that, which doesn’t make any sense. So, I’m inside a pet. I don't know, spiritually or consciously. I can influence the pet. I can’t make the pet talk or send my thoughts, really. I’ve been working on that. I feel like I kinda have to discover more things about the pet. Now, this particular pet that I’m in now is a bunny rabbit, or I guess a bunny. I’m not young, but I’m not too old. I get called a few different things. I got really lucky today. Maybe that’s why I went on and on and on, ‘cause I feel like my first day was handed to me on a silver platter with carrots and pets and cooing voices, ‘cause normally it won't go like this.

You’ll have to do a lot of listening, which for a bunny, pretty easy; I got big ears…and really comfortable…I don't know if Peter Cottontail ever said this, but even when you’re not bouncing, a cottontail is nice to sit on, apparently. Well, apparently to me. Can’t get enough of it. So, if you’re a bunny, it’s nice sitting around. Okay, so, some days you’ll have to listen for a few days to figure out what’s going on. Who, what, where, when, why, how; that should be trying…those are the things you want to establish, ‘cause you’re here to help someone at what someone’s decided, however the mechanisms that…I’m not a part of at all…this is a turning point in the person’s life.

Now, it’s usually a subtle turning point, and you kinda have to determine hey, it may not even be obvious what’s the turning point or who you’re there to serve, how you can help them…what do they need help with? Who, what, where, when, how, why, when…whatever. So, yeah, I think that’s…so, I’m a rabbit. Oh, my name is Rin, my real name, but B3 or Bunicula III, or Bunicula 3. Those are the three names. B3 normally, but I wouldn’t have known this unless I got lucky today, because…and I’m not positive who my…my caretaker currently also has three names, so I…that makes me more think they are, but it seems like there’s some shared parent…bunny parenting with someone else. But I got very lucky ‘cause both of these two people, along with briefly…but…were interviewed by their college paper.

So I know…were at a university or a college, there’s a newspaper still printed, apparently, and they were interviewing Geo, or Geoff, Geoff with a G, but they…it’s not…that’s even the person…they said so, you’re name’s not Geoff with a G. They said no, it’s Geoff, or…so, people call me Geo or Joff or Geoff; Joff. But Geo’s fine. Then they said, who’s this? That’s how I knew my name. Then there was…Del was there. Now, Del and Geo are in a band together. This is what the interview was about. We’ll get to more of those details as I learn them. So, those are the whos. Who…what; thus far that I’ve learned from the interview is that this is a pretty big university and I think there’s colleges within the university. That’s why there’s a college paper, maybe.

I don't know if I was listening, ‘cause I was trying to get all the details about…I don't think there’s any way I’m supposed to help the person interviewing, ‘cause I didn’t even get their name…because they didn’t pet me or anything. Oh, I’m free…I’m mostly a free-ranging rabbit. The door to my cage is open and I don’t…which is cool. I guess I’m potty…or cage-trained. So, just…those details aren’t super important, but it’s automatic. I just go back to my cage or outside. I just go in the grass. So…okay, no, I don't confuse rugs with grass. That’s…a part of my brain just asked. Okay, who. What is this battle of the bands. So, this is a really big school and there’s a lot of art and music in the…at this school. They have this giant battle of the bands, which they haven’t had in a few years. So, this is the first year.

Geo and Del are both seniors that are graduating. It is spring and this is kind of towards the end of the year celebration. It’s a big battle of the bands, and it’s complicated. Also complicated by…the school also has math and engineer…a lot of math and engineering. So, this is a big community event. There’s some sort of weighted voting and there’s also…so, there’s public…or attendants vote…people attending voting and there’s a panel of judges voting on each band battle, which starts tomorrow. It’s kind of like where…this part I’m not even sure I totally understand. Maybe I’ll understand more. So…but Geo and Del are very confident. I’ll tell you that much. They’re seniors. You don’t have to be a senior to participate. They participated as freshmen but not the past two years.

So…and oh, they’re in some sort of romantic relationship, Geo and Del. So, okay, so, where was I? Oh, the battle of the bands. So, somehow, a band will play against a band. There’s different rules as each…it’s a tournament but it’s…here’s…there’s a couple important things to know. If your band loses — this is I guess a way they’ve always done it — your band has to break up permanently, at least in the eyes of all the students in the university, but even off-campus places where these bands might perform. It’s like a tradition at the school. So, you would be scoffed at if you stayed together. It’s considered fun; these are young, resilient students. But so, any time you win a match, your band breaks up…or lose a match, your band breaks up.

But then they reassemble those bands, so each time a band loses, the math part of the school and the engineering part of the school use some sort of way to reassemble the bands for another round of competition. So, you’re like, going against a band that’s…well, first you’re…it’s…everybody’s going against each other. Then I think you go against a newly-formed band, then a winning band, and each round you’re going back and forth until there’s only two bands that haven’t broken up yet. Right? Oh no, ‘cause one of them could have…oh no, yeah, ‘til there’s only two bands left, I guess. I didn’t even think about that. ‘Cause…just because Geo’s particularly confident that they’re gonna…not bragadociously, but they’re one of the most popular bands around at the school, and…but not outside of the school.

It’s just…and what else? Oh, so there’s a big prize, especially this year –I don't know if it was before — where you go on a European tour. It’s pay…you’re paid and it’s paid for. Not a lot of money, but a all-expenses-paid European tour. Like, no plan…it’s already booked and with time…at a leisurely pace. So, that’s exciting for the bands, too, particularly for Geo. Whenever that came up, Geo would look at Del, and Del would look at Geo, too. What else do we got? So, battle of the bands…I tried to make notes in my mind which isn’t super-effective. So, paid for uni…who, what, what…where; on campus. Big parties, multiple days. Oh, who, what, where, when, why…I think Geo and Del seemed to really want to win.

They talked about it, talked about being seniors, they talked about lives going in different directions and getting to spend this time together and the European tour, that they love this…it’d be a great way to…either way, it’s a great way to…but they didn’t mean it; say goodbye to the school and a honor to participate…it’s gonna be really fun. Oh, neither one of them has really traveled, so it was a opportunity that neither one of them has had, or the other band members…I don't know, I wasn’t paying attention. I’m zeroed in on these two. So, you could hear me apologizing and say…it turns out I’m supposed to help this reporter. Even a lot of their music is driven by imaginary travel. Haven’t heard any of the music yet. Who, what, where, when…okay, and then how. The reporter actually asked them this; so, I said, how?

Well, it’s about connecting with the audience, having fun, and playing to the best of our ability, rehearsing, but also being open because there’s gonna be surprises. Being fluid; that was another thing, working as a team, as a band, but sticking to the plan. Almost perfect; that word was used, and follow the plan. So, I think that’s it for now. I mean, that’s all I gathered. It wasn’t a lot…they did do rehearsal, but I couldn’t hear…I could hear noise, but I was…I don't know if that’s because of my big ears or it’s just that I would have been in the way. So, I didn’t hear a rehearsal, and then I fell asleep, to be honest. I don't know even know. Maybe I should wake up since they’re in college and pay more attention. But that’s it…I guess I’ll rest and I’ll be…for you, if you’re listening, I…either you’ll not hear the next thing or you’ll hear the next thing right away.

So, cool. Okay, hey, it’s me, Rin, again, or B3. So, day one of the band competition is over. Some things have happened here that I can totally fill you in on. Let’s see…so, I was allowed to go to the competition but it is pretty loud, and I’m…everybody knows me, so I am allow…so, I do keep some distance from the stage and we did leave to go out…so, I didn’t get…I’m not…it’d be better if I was present 24/7, but that’s just not possible. But my understanding is sixty-four bands…so, it’s again…there’s that college basketball thing, so I think it’s a intertwined alternative. I think they even schedule it. Maybe basketball is popular at this school. So, it’s scheduled at the same time as the games. Those are only theories, though. Okay, so the band they’re up against was called The Arrows.

They sing…oh, so you just had to do an original song only for this first round. The arrow song was Coke Zero, and they were very…they were not…they were not…even though it felt like it was not late at night or anything, they had been enjoying themselves too much and over-indulged. So, their play was very drunk and sloppy. Geo, they played Break the Wheel. What else? Oh, so they played a song, Break the Wheel. It was very catchy. I was a little distracted just ‘cause I know you were wondering well, what’s the name of the band? It’s just that…I guess it’s not named after…it’s not the Rins or…it’s The Buniculas. So, I just feel like you’d say, you’re making that up. But luckily…I guess that’s another…why I’m part of the band or whatever, ‘cause my picture’s on stuff, or Bunicula’s picture, which is a character in a book.

I’m Bunicula III, which leads me…at first I thought I was the third in a series of bunnies, but maybe I’m only the second in a series of bunnies. But don’t worry; as far as I know, I’m only…I’m a vegetarian. I only eat carrots and lettuce and some sort of pellet. But what else? Yeah, so that was a easy win, I guess is the thing. Then there was some down time because…I don't know, there was…first, all the bands played, then everything went into the algorithm, and then there was a break. So, this also created a situation like The Arrows where people were enjoying the break a lot of the bands that were…the reformulated bands. So, then they were supposed to play a cover song, but this isn’t always gonna be the case, which also puts the reformed bands at a disadvantage.

But for this one, the band…they called themselves Blue Pleather. It was a reformulated band from whatever the algorithm…and the cover song was Walking on Sunshine. Blue Pleather played a very slow version of it. Oh, this is more…a lot of the…it’s all different kinds of bands, but the Buniculas is a little bit more punky rock, but mixed genres. Blue Pleather was more of a…what is that called? Rockabilly, but it was too slow. So, that was…seemed like a easy one even for me, and I’m not a…I’m just a rabbit. Okay, but this was also…because even Geo and Del and the rest of the band…most of the bands are only four or five people. They also kind of partied a little hard. So, there was some definite disagreements going on because Geo…even Geo was like, kind of setting limits on how much partying could be done, but not exactly following them.

So, there was a lot of strong feelings and…being expressed in a way. But so, tomorrow, I think the schedule…I don't know. I guess it’s…they’ll just be going back and forth? I don't…this is…I don't know if it was my bunny brain or just me, but it definitely seems complicated. So, I’ll be back soon…you know, tomorrow…tomorrow for me. I’m trying to think of any other details. Oh, so…oh yeah, I guess this is important, is I’ve gotta figure out some way…yeah, I guess…what am I doing? I should be doing my job. I’m just relaying information. This is also for me to help me tomorrow. So, I do need to find a way to maybe help Geo be a little bit more compassionate and empathetic with the band members and have…Geo talked about the joy for the audience, but then Geo’s kind of wielding the joy in a way that’s a little bit aggressive.

Geo also does seem needing Del’s approval, but seeking Del’s approval by maintaining his perfectionist-type attitude. I’m just getting to know…so I’m like, how can I help with this? So, I don't know if…not to be overly judgmental, but I don't know if this style is working, right? So, I don't know. I guess I’m trying to figure out how to be helpful tomorrow, especially as a rabbit, ‘cause it’s like…I mean, if looking cute and relaxed solved everything, there wouldn’t be a…there wouldn’t be anything for me to do. So, I don't know. I’m gonna try to think about that and try to figure out a way to get through to Geo and say hey, don’t…there’s a lot invested in the results of…I feel like, again…and I think this is why I’m here, though, is Geo thinks that winning this…also, I read some of Geo’s journals, so you may…I don't know if that’s what their policy — if they’re teaching about that — is.

Also music notes, but…that Geo thinks that winning this will either…will hopefully solidify the relationship with Del so that they won't…that it’ll continue on into the future. So, Geo’s not expecting a record deal or anything like that, but it’s like winning and going on the European vacation will solidify their relationship or that it’ll be like one last…that it’ll make…if it does have to end, that it’ll make it okay and there will be something for them to savor together, and the first trip or the first…they’ve been on airplanes briefly, or Geo has. Del has not. So, even the comforting on the airplane and all that…so, yeah, that’s what’s…so, I just gotta figure out a way to get through to things. So, I’ll be back with a update, I guess, pretty soon for you, but tomorrow for me.

Okay, hey, it’s Rin again and I do have some…a lot of updates ‘cause today was a busy day. There’s a lot of updates. I did figure out how to get through to…or, Geo, kind of. So, maybe I should explain that first, which I would have never thought, and this is why this is a learning process. I don't know if you listen to any of my other recordings, but I’m new to this. I mean, I’ve done it a few times, quite a few…a few times. Maybe I don't even remember this part, but maybe…one of the things we could do…and the good thing is, the limits of the system, is make art as the thing, some sort of art or some sort of…try to create something as your pet. But you can’t create something that’s gonna make them think you’ve been…so, I could just put my…drag my tail and stuff, and instead, they notice it and you can kind of…the only messages you can send are subtle.

It’s just a limitation of the system thus far that I’ve discovered. So, it’s not like you could write…I could write something out with my tail, even if I tried. So, if I’m pushing that intention to the bunny…’cause we’re kind of working together, Bunicula and I. B3, sorry. But it’s just a bunny. It has limited capacity for this kind of stuff. So, even if you’re kind of pushing your intention through, the system’s limited, or the sweet, sweet, bunny…Bunicula…B3. So, it’s not like you can…or not like I’ve been able to make some sort of clear piece of art, but I did make something that looked like a thunder bolt because I was thinking about the intensity from yesterday and then the intensity from today, because we don’t have a drummer and that is not good. I guess I’m trying to do things in order. It didn’t seem like it was good.

They said they were out of the band, permanent. They had just left a voice…sent a text and a voicemail. Then Geo is demanding they pick up their phone, then Del was like, just stop calling. This is what they said…they left Del…they sent Geo a text that said I’m out. They sent a message to Del that said hey, listen, I can’t…I got…I’m still…have some stuff coming up, exams, and I can’t balance both of these intensities. So, I’ve gotta choose, and I chose. They’re also not a senior, so they’re out of the band. In this case, with this notice, you can go on. You don’t have to drop out, but you can’t replace the person. So, obviously there’s a lot of strong feelings. So, I did a lightning bolt, and I guess we took the…they said, is that…it almost looks like a squig…worm. Like, a thing with my tail; it got caught on ink or whatever.

But I mean, Geo’s nice. He’s…oh, look, it’s so cute. Like, no, it’s a lightning bolt. So, Geo under…gets me and said hey, this is…we gotta go…we gotta rage on this one. They kinda did rally at first because they were up against a recently-formed band and they had to play two originals. The band was formed last…yesterday, so that band had to stay up all night rehearsing, where we only had to rehearse a little bit. Yeah, so we played two originals and then one cover, which is a song I don't know the name of. It’s like, exit light, enter night, off to Never Never Land or something. I know it’s by Metallica. Then we played two songs; one called Ceramic Heart and one called Soleda, which is in Spanish. Even without the drummers, it didn’t go great, and probably one of the songs did…went very poorly.

But the other band they were up against…even without the drums, it did…it just…they just weren’t…they were just a recently-formed band. Now, on the break after this…’cause we were gonna go up against a new band so you don’t have as long…or, a band that won or has not…hasn’t broken up yet, we had a shorter break but we happened to go early. So, then Geo said I gotta talk to Jacinda, who I guess is some legend at this school, like a eighth-year senior or something like that…won the competition and is this purveyor of wisdom. So, then Jacinda came and…just for Geo. Like, Geo and Jacinda…I guess Jacinda and Del don’t get along. Also, I think Jacinda’s good at mathematics, so…because…luckily, I guess. So, the short version is, in the next competition they lost because they didn’t have a drummer.

It was…I was a little bit further away ‘cause Jacinda closed my cage, so I couldn’t even make out the songs. But the band they were up against is…had been playing the whole time together. They had their full band and we did not. So, that’s the end of Bunicula…The Buniculas. But Jacinda and Geo…so, okay, so then we’re gonna be…we’re waiting to get our next band. But Jacinda said don’t worry. So, everybody…the three band members from the former Buniculas kinda said okay, bummer. But it’s still fun. I guess I’m making it out…maybe I’m…I mean, ‘cause I’m doing work, here. Even Geo…Del and the other person, they were like okay, well…they’re still having fun. It wasn’t like there was as much meaning, and Geo’s kind of hiding a lot of it and saying…but I could tell Geo’s down, but also, Geo’s very driven.

Then Jacinda is very…wanting to help. But I’ve caught something, which we’ll talk about later. So, Jacinda’s like, don’t worry. We’ll…let’s do the math and said okay, here’s…so, I’m not comfortable with any of this, to be honest. So, I’m trying to do a question mark now with my tail and haven’t had success thus far. But I’m gonna…tomorrow morning I’m determined that when Geo wakes up, there’s a question mark or something like it. I don't know, maybe I could do a spiral towards the middle, but that’s…but so, Jacinda said okay, here’s what has to happen; you have to lose. So, now the plan…oh, because the best broken-up band…reformulated band also gets to go on the European tour because…if they win, because they could still win, right?

So, Del said…or Jacinda said okay, if you and this band lose and Del’s band wins and then loses, there’s a chance, and…Jacinda said, and a chance — I know a lot of people owe me favors — that you could still be put back in a band together right at the very end. You’d have to win once to get into the final and win again. Probably people would be bent about it because you’re in the same band, but that just means the math has to be on our side. But also, the other thing is this is a bit of a game of attrition. A lot of people very similar to our drummer say, you know what? Just take me out of the pool because I got exams or I just want to have fun now. So, it’s not like everybody’s staying in the pool to be recycled, and a lot of…I think it’s a thing of respect that seniors are supposed to stay in — I think this is a unwritten rule — and then the lower-classmen are supposed to pull out, anyway.

So…that the seniors have a chance…a second chance, and there’s not that many seniors in this competition. So, that’s what’s on…scheduled for tomorrow, is I don't think that’s a good idea to lose on purpose with the band that wants to win and then to somehow try to force…to find a way to make sure…so, there’s gotta be levels of trickery in here with Jacinda. So, I’ll be back, I guess, with more information. I think I’m gonna try to draw that question mark and I’ll see what I come up with. Okay, it’s Rin again. A lot’s happened. So, I’m trying to give it…I’ll try to give it to you in order and walk myself through things. I was not able to do a question mark with my tail, but my…so, starting off, I tried to…or, this morning or whatever, when I got up…and my cage door was open.

It’s interesting; just in case you’re…I guess no one…if you’re a human in some sort of timeline and somehow you got access to this, a little confusing to be a open-range bunny, but where I sleep and eat is also…it just sticks out to me, where I also take care of my…’cause if you ever watch a bunny’s nose, I’m always smelling. So, I mean, that’s how I know to avoid certain patches of whatever those are, cedar chips. Okay, so I tried to do a question mark. It didn’t look like a question mark, but then I saw Geo get up and they kinda traced the thing and they looked at my tail and kinda held it gently, gently in their fingers, patted me on the…in-between the ears, did the old stroke-finger-between-the-ears and said huh, it looks like you’ve been…I don't know.

They traced…then they traced the thing, and it kinda looked like a up-and-down chart of something going up and going down. Not mountain peaks, but more like…I don't know, some sort of math, finance-type chart. So, they thought about it, they patted me again, and then they set…stepped forth to execute Jacinda’s plan, which I think they had been working on and they were trying to stay fluid and work on ideas, but they…so, Geo’s band…new band surprise…which was a surprise, lost due to a couple instrument failures of other band members going in and out, and then Geo getting frustrated, making Geo look good but…or look bad, but not too bad. Geo kinda looked irritated but then tried to contain their irritation and tried to keep going.

Then Del was kinda like hey, okay…and then Geo…I don't want to get into too many details ‘cause it makes Geo…I guess I’m Geo’s pet, right? But Geo worked behind the scenes, worked interpersonally as well as to make sure Del had won…said, I can’t wait to go see you and maybe I’ll…maybe we’ll face you in the finals. So, at that point it was kind of like…kind of tension that raised, I think, the romantic stakes in a…not in a…or not…it had no stakes. It kind of created a tension that was positive. They were flirty and having fun about it. Geo was close, right, to where I thought the direction I needed to help Geo get to. But Jacinda was also there; put me back in the cage, and they sabotaged Del’s band. Then what happened was I said okay…okay, so, Jacinda had me in the cage a lot of the time.

Then Del was really disappointed, but Geo was not. Del picked it up and said why are you so happy that we lost? It was a disagreement, right? Another one. Now, Del only picked up on one layer of things, which was that oh, you’re excited because you think there’s a chance we’ll get placed in the same band together. Geo said well, I mean…and I don't know if that one was…but I said okay, I can’t…I’m still concerned about this whole thing. Correct? I’m not sure what exactly I should do to intervene. But I felt like…this is all a case of…the old saying; if you hold onto something carbon long enough, it’ll become a diamond, with enough pressure. Then people saying actually…this was just something I overheard once at…in the last four days. They said you’d need a hand this big and this long, and that’s just not physically possible.

But it really stuck with me that the other person said back, it doesn’t mean it’s not…that I won't try it. Again, I was only hearing fragments of the conversation because there’s a lot of music going on all the time. Also, at this point, I have to suspect the fact that Jacinda…the fact that Jacinda…the Cinda name is taking on some sort of significance here and that Jacinda, Lucinda, Cinda…there’s something going on. Jacinda’s trying to…I can’t imagine it’s just a coincidence, right, and that it’s not happening for some other reason or that Jacinda’s not trying to get in my way. But I don't have any proof of it because I just don’t. So, what I decided to do was hold onto a carrot and not eat it, like that diamond, and then just see what Geo would do. Then eventually Geo said are you gonna eat that carrot? We gotta go.

I just sat there and held the carrot tightly, as tightly as my cute little forepaws could hold it, and put my chin on it. Then Geo tried to take it away and I just squeezed it against me. Then Geo got…but said B3, what are you doing? I held it on as tightly as I could. Geo said hey, take it easy. Very comfort…just like you could help somebody else, but you can’t help you with your own problems or whatever they say. But even said what…do you think you’re gonna hold onto this carrot forever? It’ll be here later, or they’ll be another carrot or maybe something else. You can’t take this carrot with you to the band thing. If it was…we could leave it in your…and I said, gross. Please don’t leave it in my crate. But I couldn’t say that, obviously.

Then what progressed from there…at first…and I don't want to take credit for it because I’m only part of the turning point…and maybe I had some influence, maybe I didn’t, ‘cause things didn’t work out ideally. But at some point Del became…Del’s band lost, as we said, then Del was aware that Geo was hoping they would lose. Then Del discovered that Jacinda was…these…people…some people talk about everything, whether you’re a mathematician, an astrophysicist, or a expert on pronounce…not…you’re not a expert on quadratic equations or you failed making a song called Algorithmic back in 2014. Those people…some people talk. So, it got back to Del that Jacinda was trying to make sure that Del and Geo were gonna be on the same band. Something didn’t land right.

Now, at first you could say well, it’s probably…there’s no…it doesn’t matter. It didn’t land right with Del. Eventually what happened was that Del approached Geo and said, I’m pulling out of the pool. I took my name out of the pool. Geo was struck by that; what do you mean? Like, I still have a large percent chance…we’re both seniors…that…there’s still a chance to win. For one of us, it doubles our chances. Del said yeah, it doubles our chances, huh? I mean, probably the probability…what if someone…Del said you’re kinda cheating on…you’re cheating the rules. You’re cheating the music, and I’m not cool with that. I don't want to be a part of it. I did this for fun and excitement and the process.

Yeah, it would have been cool to travel Europe together or individually, but I feel like this…like our band broke up and basically I think not only are…is our band breaking up as a result of this, but we are. Maybe you should accept some responsibility for it, Geo. To Geo’s credit, holy resilience. Geo said, you’re right. This whole time, I’ve been trying to control all these outcomes and the reason we originally lost our drummer was because I was too strict and pressure…everything was too systematic and had to be my way. Too much pressure. I always thought pressure made a diamond. Del said it does, actually, ‘cause Del’s a…what is that called? Not a Chemistry Major. They don’t say that anymore. Micro-chemist or something. I don't know. Or Geothermal chemist?

Oh, so…and then they kinda joked about that to relieve some tension. But Geo said I was wrong. My behavior was driven by…I had a diamond in my hand the whole time, or a pretty nice rock. A piece of carbon’s pretty nice. Then they went back and forth again and cracked up. Yeah, basically that was the lesson…Geo said well, I’ve lost the carbon for the…I lost the diamond for the carbon. So, I guess it’s…I mean, this…they were at a younger stage in their life and they were also caught up in this. Now, the surprise to Del was that Geo said well, I’m gonna stay in the pool. I guess I’m not all about…I’m about gray areas, so some of you trainers…and that’s what they were supposed to be trained to do. So, some of you might say well, maybe I should have got Geo to confess…but Geo’s intention was…Geo made poor choices.

But lo and behold, Geo’s band won, and…today, this evening, and Geo’s going to Europe. Del is not. They’re no longer together but they seem friendly. It’ll be the next stage in Geo’s life, I guess. I guess I’ll probably…I feel like this is the kinda subtle resolution that they’ve been wanting us to be involved in, that I was barely involved in. You say, how does this…? I say well, it’s not a major turning point in someone’s life ‘cause if you get involved with those…you know what I mean? It just is all fuzzy. But I mean, as far as I’m concerned, I don't think you could take a bunny to Europe anyway, so as soon as they get me outta here, I’ll be on my next mission. But I think things will work out for Geo and for Del. Maybe for the reporter. If I was supposed to help the reporter, holy cow.

But I’m aware of this Jacinda and I’m paying close attention to that as well, and now I’m gonna get some rest. I sleep all the way…the furthest part of my cage…I’ve designed a way…I’m just kidding. You’re inert to it or whatever as a rabbit. I mean, you do go…anyway, you don’t want to think about it, anyway. I wish I had a salt lick. Hopefully I’ll dream of salt licks later and then I’ll be on my next report, whatever order you’re listening to these in. Don’t lose the…I don't know. I guess I…don’t lose the carbon for the diamond, as they say. If you have a piece of coal in your hand, it might be the present you needed instead of the present you wanted. If Santa Claus is giving coal…but don’t try to turn your coal into a diamond, ‘cause it’s not physically possible. I mean, an incredible waste of your energy. That’s what I learned. Goodnight, everybody.

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcribed by Leah Hervoly)

Notable Language:

• Skiparockamundo
• Bespoke Sandwich Cookies
• The Old Stroke Finger Between the Ears

Notable Culture:

• Sisyphus
• Bunnicula
• March Madness

Notable Talking Points:

• Procrastinating on Imaginarily Painting
• Band vs Band, Tournament Style
• Something is going on with all these -cinda names