
Bedtime stories to help grown ups fall asleep in the deep, dark night.
Christmas Vacation | Tale of the Tape | Holiday Favorite 628
It will be a long winding journey down that holiday memory road with Clark and his family.
-
Tale of the Tape / Seasonal
Hobbit Architecture
http://www.dirtcheapbuilder.com/Articles/Hobbit_Architecture.htm
https://archerbuchanan.com/portfolio/hobbit-house/
https://www.core77.com/posts/24039/an-architecture-firm-takes-the-hobbit-house-seriously-24039
Christmas Vacation
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/60330/27-things-you-might-not-know-about-christmas-vacation
https://www.looper.com/1047576/the-festive-story-behind-national-lampoons-christmas-vacation/
Pink Panther Opening Sequences
https://www.startribune.com/7-of-the-best-ever-opening-credits-in-movie-history/600038027/
https://www.watchthetitles.com/titlesequence/the-pink-panther/
https://cartoonresearch.com/index.php/the-art-of-the-pink-panther-movie-titles/
Extreme Christmas Lights
https://www.familyhandyman.com/list/the-most-outrageous-christmas-light-displays/
DOWN TO BUSINESS
Hopefully you’re not pondering too hard
Deep Dark Night United
Melanie (Zocdoc)
PLUGS
Friends of Hand in Hand; Pete Davidson SNL Cold Open; The Midnight MIssion; Trevor Project; Patreon; SleepPhones; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline; Referral Program
SPONSORS
Wild Health; Hello Fresh; Polysleep; Odoo; Helix Sleep; Air Doctor Pro; Zocdoc; Progressive
INTRO
Colds, wind, any other seasonal stuff
Aural Safe Place
You can enter through the beaded curtains, velvet curtains, or our various doorway shapes
We have a Hobbit Anteroom
I wouldn’t mind living in a hobbit house, tbh
Jangle curtains for the holidays
My imaginary holiday TV show pitch
“Home Makeovers for the Holidays”
Candy Cane Curtains
Which entrance would my ego and I go through to enter the safe place?
Rabbits running down Christmas hills
What’s a Christmas hill, anyway?
I’m trying to remember National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
The tape that runs in my brain
I do, in fact, remember Beverly D’Angelo
I’ll probably call Randy Quaid Randy Newman
Bobby Quaid, are you listening?
Bobby Quaid, Houston Oilers QB
Now I’m picturing Beau Bridges
This is a real tangled web
WWBB (What Would Beau Bacon) say about this?
I can only assume that Dennis and Randy Quaid are brothers
I’ll take that with a side of Beau Bacon
Things overheard at a Bed and Breakfast
Last night I could really not sleep
On and on until the break of dawn
I’ve tried it all
STORY
Time to talk Christmas Vacation
I know I’ve liked a lot of National Lampoon movies
It has a great song but I won’t sing it lest it get stuck in your head
This movie has probably suffered from overexposure
Teen Boy Goofball Suburbanesque Target Demographic
The Middle Late Chevy Chase Period
Who knows how much I’ll remember, anyways?
I guess this movie is just a sequence of events
His name is Clark, not Wallace
The original Vacation is unbelievable
European Vacation doesn’t stay in my mind quite as much
An animated Pink Panther-esque opening
I think Santa has a really hard time entering the house in this sequence
Well done and very colorful
Verging into Kenny Loggins Territory
This may have been the beginning of Ford Tauruses
The Ford Taurus was the first aspirational sedan
We had 2 For Taurus
A powdered blue wood paneled one
And a soft green one
Then we went to a hot dog van that was colored like a hot dog
I don’t know if I’ve ever personally owned a Ford
Do they have an electric Ford Taurus nowadays?
The reveal of the children
Juliette Lewis appreciation
My dad loves Big Bang Theory and Young Sheldon
Johnny Galecki is the other child
Clark wants to chop a tree down in the wild
Clark is a nostalgic dreamer
Family Unity Through Symbols
They run into some tough bikers on the road
Clark is getting unnecessarily competitive
Beverly D’Angelo is always being the voice of reason
We meet their next door neighbors, 80s yuppies
Julia Louis-Dreyfus doesn’t like her suburban buffoon neighbors
An ongoing issue where Clark has sap on his hands
Clark works for a food additive company
I don’t think I’ve ever worked at a job that had Christmas bonuses
Clark already used his Christmas bonus for a down payment on a swimming pool
His friend is often in these National Lampoon movies
Clark shouldn’t have spent his bonus until he actually got it
His boss can’t remember his name
Clark spends all day putting up Christmas lights
Clark will have the greatest lights in the history of the world
The beats of each episode are structured well
His lights won’t light!
He tosses the plastic Santa
He’s very funny when he boils over
Turns out the garage light switch was just off
An unbelievably bright light
The yuppies are blinded and crash into their shrimp flambe
I’m not sure how Randy Quaid is related to this family
Usually Randy Quaid is smoking and disheveled
What in the heck is he doing here??
Now they live in an RV
They want Clark’s family to house their children so RQ and his wife can have some alone time
We meet 2 cousin children
One little boy that looks like Elvis
One girl who’s name is Trudy or Rudy or something. Ruby!
Very nice and very verbose
Both sets of in-laws have also arrived at the same time
Ruby is a very cute voice of wisdom
A true believe in Christmas
She adds a necessary element of sincerity
The entire family being there adds an extra element of emotional charge
Cousin Eddy, that’s his name!
Clark has a hard time with things out of his control
This was before I knew what Wal-Mart was
Clark is buying presents for Eddy’s kids and dog
A lot of dog food
Clark runs into his wife who was secretly buying him a gift
Then they go sledding
Sledding is a quick sequence but very funny
Clark sprays an aluminum circular sled with industrial lubricant
He goes so fast that he speeds and jumps through the air
But this bit doesn’t always hold up after a few viewings
The night before Christmas Eve is next up
Clark fantasizes about the swimming pool
Vitality, Success, and Family Unity
Clark is softened by Ruby’s softness
Then it’s Christmas Eve
Tension builds
The parents don’t want Clark to go overboard
The arrival of guests is next
More trouble with the neighbors
Randy Newman dumps the RV right into the sewer
Then even more family show up
Some cheaper geriatric jokes
Some classic food humor
The uncle is kind of a jerk and is smoking
They’re drinking egg nog out of moose glasses
The dog gets in the kitchen garbage
And grandma’s cat gets too into the tree and then heads to Big Farm
They discover there’s a squirrel in the tree
The squirrel emerges and creates total chaos at dinner time
JLD can’t handle her neighbors anymore
The family is bonding over chasing this squirrel
It seems like Christmas couldn’t get any worse
The courrier shows up with his Christmas bonus
The power of swimming pools to unite family bonding
But his bonus is a yearlong subscription to the Fruitcake of the Month Club
Clark is over the top mad
One last tradition where they read “The Night Before Christmas”
An actual moment of togetherness
Randy Quaid goes to gather Clark’s boss so Clark can yell at him
JLD calls the ethics team on Randy Quaid
The guy playing this jerky boss is so great
The whole family starts laying into Clark’s boss
Don’t mislead people about Christmas bonuses!
Then the Ethics Squad rolls up full force
But not until after the boss writes Clark an actual check
Even the boss’s wife and the Ethics Squad can’t believe the boss would cancel the Christmas Bonuses
Then I’m not sure how it all ends, to be honest with you
The gas from the RV/sewer shoots the lawn Santa up into the sky
Ruby sees Santa flying through the night
Maybe there’s a unity song that ends this movie
Movie facts
Written by John Hughes
Music is by Angelo Badalamenti
Holiday movies aren’t really on the streaming services
A lot of famous people are in this that I didn’t realize
John Hughes initially wrote this as a magazine article for National Lampoon
Shot in Colorado and Warner Brothers lot
Oh, Lindsey Buckingham wrote “Holiday Road” for the initial movie
This is the only movie to not feature this song
Whoa Back to the Future II came out the same weekend
Mixed Critical Reviews
Roger Ebert gave it 2 stars
PATREON THANKS
Laurie, Marsha, Patty, Meredith, Cindy, Genevieve, Privacy, Caitlin, Autumn, Charles, Rachelle, Gus, Damiana, Estina, Eric, Carolyn, Gwendolyn, Hana, Anonymous, Deanna, Barbara, Nicky, Deron, Nicholas, Jess, Timmy, Caleb, Kristen, Shenise, Pam, Chris, Mark, Debby, Ashley, Jennifer, Amanda, Mike, Karen, Rebecca, Matthew, Kat, Lea, Natalia, Rachel, Cartoons by Hilary, Megan, Sarah, Suzie, Carl, Renee, James, Rebecca, Lauren, Deborah, Kate, Sevi, Kirsten, Morgan, Loren, Sarah, Lisa, Renee, Rhonda, Michael, Lisa, Ellen, Kieran, Rachel, Sally, Bebop, Kara, Alexander, Maddy, Hannah, Alyssa
SUMMARY:
Episode: 1,216b / 628
Title: Christmas Vacation | Tale of the Tape | Holiday Favorite 628
Deep Dark Night United: Melanie (Zocdoc)
Plugs: Friends of Hand in Hand; Pete Davidson SNL Cold Open; The Midnight MIssion; Trevor Project; Patreon; SleepPhones; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline; Referral Program
Sponsors: Wild Health; Hello Fresh; Polysleep; Odoo; Helix Sleep; Air Doctor Pro; Zocdoc; Progressive
Patreon Thanks: Laurie, Marsha, Patty, Meredith, Cindy, Genevieve, Privacy, Caitlin, Autumn, Charles, Rachelle, Gus, Damiana, Estina, Eric, Carolyn, Gwendolyn, Hana, Anonymous, Deanna, Barbara, Nicky, Deron, Nicholas, Jess, Timmy, Caleb, Kristen, Shenise, Pam, Chris, Mark, Debby, Ashley, Jennifer, Amanda, Mike, Karen, Rebecca, Matthew, Kat, Lea, Natalia, Rachel, Cartoons by Hilary, Megan, Sarah, Suzie, Carl, Renee, James, Rebecca, Lauren, Deborah, Kate, Sevi, Kirsten, Morgan, Loren, Sarah, Lisa, Renee, Rhonda, Michael, Lisa, Ellen, Kieran, Rachel, Sally, Bebop, Kara, Alexander, Maddy, Hannah, Alyssa
Notable Language:
- Aural Safe Place
- Hobbit Anteroom
- Candy Cane Curtains
- WWBB (What Would Beau Bacon)
- Goofy-Like Human (GLH)
- Teen Boy Goofball Suburbanesque Target Demographic
- Kenny Loggins Territory (KLT)
- Family Unity Through Symbols
- Suburban Buffoon
- Shrimp Flambe
- Cheaper Geriatric Jokes (CGJs)
Notable Culture:
- The Hobbit
- National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
- Candy Cane Curtains, a Holiday homemaking show
-
- Beverly D’Angelo
- Randy Quaid
- Randy Newman
- The Bacon Brothers
- The Bridges Brothers
- Dennis Quaid
- “Holiday Road” song
- Vacation
- European Vacation
-
- Pink Panther
- Caddyshack
-
- Kenny Loggins
- Ford Taurus
- Juliette Lewis
- The Big Bang Theory
- Young Sheldon
-
- Johnny Galecki
- Julia Louis-Dreyfus
- Don Quixote
-
- “The Night Before Christmas”
- Scrooged
-
- John Hughes
- Back to the Future II
- Roger Ebert
- Angelo Badalamenti
Notable Talking Points:
- Colds, wind, any other seasonal stuff
- Aural Safe Place
- You can enter through the beaded curtains, velvet curtains, or our various doorway shapes
- We have a Hobbit Anteroom
- I wouldn’t mind living in a hobbit house, tbh
- Jangle curtains for the holidays
- My imaginary holiday TV show pitch
- “Home Makeovers for the Holidays”
- Candy Cane Curtains
- Which entrance would my ego and I go through to enter the safe place?
- Rabbits running down Christmas hills
- What’s a Christmas hill, anyway?
- I’m trying to remember National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
- The tape that runs in my brain
- I do, in fact, remember Beverly D’Angelo
- I’ll probably call Randy Quaid Randy Newman
- Bobby Quaid, are you listening?
- Bobby Quaid, Houston Oilers QB
- Now I’m picturing Beau Bridges
- This is a real tangled web
- WWBB (What Would Beau Bacon) say about this?
- I can only assume that Dennis and Randy Quaid are brothers
- I’ll take that with a side of Beau Bacon
- Things overheard at a Bed and Breakfast
- Last night I could really not sleep
- On and on until the break of dawn
- I’ve tried it all
- Time to talk Christmas Vacation
- I know I’ve liked a lot of National Lampoon movies
- It has a great song but I won’t sing it lest it get stuck in your head
- This movie has probably suffered from overexposure
- Teen Boy Goofball Suburbanesque Target Demographic
- The Middle Late Chevy Chase Period
- Who knows how much I’ll remember, anyways?
- I guess this movie is just a sequence of events
- His name is Clark, not Wallace
- The original Vacation is unbelievable
- European Vacation doesn’t stay in my mind quite as much
- An animated Pink Panther-esque opening
- I think Santa has a really hard time entering the house in this sequence
- Well done and very colorful
- Verging into Kenny Loggins Territory
- This may have been the beginning of Ford Tauruses
- The Ford Taurus was the first aspirational sedan
- We had 2 For Taurus
- A powdered blue wood paneled one
- And a soft green one
- Then we went to a hot dog van that was colored like a hot dog
- I don’t know if I’ve ever personally owned a Ford
- Do they have an electric Ford Taurus nowadays?
- The reveal of the children
- Juliette Lewis appreciation
- My dad loves Big Bang Theory and Young Sheldon
- Johnny Galecki is the other child
- Clark wants to chop a tree down in the wild
- Clark is a nostalgic dreamer
- Family Unity Through Symbols
- They run into some tough bikers on the road
- Clark is getting unnecessarily competitive
- Beverly D’Angelo is always being the voice of reason
- We meet their next door neighbors, 80s yuppies
- Julia Louis-Dreyfus doesn’t like her suburban buffoon neighbors
- An ongoing issue where Clark has sap on his hands
- Clark works for a food additive company
- I don’t think I’ve ever worked at a job that had Christmas bonuses
- Clark already used his Christmas bonus for a down payment on a swimming pool
- His friend is often in these National Lampoon movies
- Clark shouldn’t have spent his bonus until he actually got it
- His boss can’t remember his name
- Clark spends all day putting up Christmas lights
- Clark will have the greatest lights in the history of the world
- The beats of each episode are structured well
- His lights won’t light!
- He tosses the plastic Santa
- He’s very funny when he boils over
- Turns out the garage light switch was just off
- An unbelievably bright light
- The yuppies are blinded and crash into their shrimp flambe
- I’m not sure how Randy Quaid is related to this family
- Usually Randy Quaid is smoking and disheveled
- What in the heck is he doing here??
- Now they live in an RV
- They want Clark’s family to house their children so RQ and his wife can have some alone time
- We meet 2 cousin children
- One little boy that looks like Elvis
- One girl who’s name is Trudy or Rudy or something. Ruby!
- Very nice and very verbose
- Both sets of in-laws have also arrived at the same time
- Ruby is a very cute voice of wisdom
- A true believe in Christmas
- She adds a necessary element of sincerity
- The entire family being there adds an extra element of emotional charge
- Cousin Eddy, that’s his name!
- Clark has a hard time with things out of his control
- This was before I knew what Wal-Mart was
- Clark is buying presents for Eddy’s kids and dog
- A lot of dog food
- Clark runs into his wife who was secretly buying him a gift
- Then they go sledding
- Sledding is a quick sequence but very funny
- Clark sprays an aluminum circular sled with industrial lubricant
- He goes so fast that he speeds and jumps through the air
- But this bit doesn’t always hold up after a few viewings
- The night before Christmas Eve is next up
- Clark fantasizes about the swimming pool
- Vitality, Success, and Family Unity
- Clark is softened by Ruby’s softness
- Then it’s Christmas Eve
- Tension builds
- The parents don’t want Clark to go overboard
- The arrival of guests is next
- More trouble with the neighbors
- Randy Newman dumps the RV right into the sewer
- Then even more family show up
- Some cheaper geriatric jokes
- Some classic food humor
- The uncle is kind of a jerk and is smoking
- They’re drinking egg nog out of moose glasses
- The dog gets in the kitchen garbage
- And grandma’s cat gets too into the tree and then heads to Big Farm
- They discover there’s a squirrel in the tree
- The squirrel emerges and creates total chaos at dinner time
- JLD can’t handle her neighbors anymore
- The family is bonding over chasing this squirrel
- It seems like Christmas couldn’t get any worse
- The courrier shows up with his Christmas bonus
- The power of swimming pools to unite family bonding
- But his bonus is a yearlong subscription to the Fruitcake of the Month Club
- Clark is over the top mad
- One last tradition where they read “The Night Before Christmas”
- An actual moment of togetherness
- Randy Quaid goes to gather Clark’s boss so Clark can yell at him
- JLD calls the ethics team on Randy Quaid
- The guy playing this jerky boss is so great
- The whole family starts laying into Clark’s boss
- Don’t mislead people about Christmas bonuses!
- Then the Ethics Squad rolls up full force
- But not until after the boss writes Clark an actual check
- Even the boss’s wife and the Ethics Squad can’t believe the boss would cancel the Christmas Bonuses
- Then I’m not sure how it all ends, to be honest with you
- The gas from the RV/sewer shoots the lawn Santa up into the sky
- Ruby sees Santa flying through the night
- Maybe there’s a unity song that ends this movie
- Movie facts
- Written by John Hughes
- Music is by Angelo Badalamenti
- Holiday movies aren’t really on the streaming services
- A lot of famous people are in this that I didn’t realize
- John Hughes initially wrote this as a magazine article for National Lampoon
- Shot in Colorado and Warner Brothers lot
- Oh, Lindsey Buckingham wrote “Holiday Road” for the initial movie
- This is the only movie to not feature this song
- Whoa Back to the Future II came out the same weekend
- Mixed Critical Reviews
- Roger Ebert gave it 2 stars
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Hi, you can call me Scooter.
Drew Ackerman is the creator and host of Sleep With Me, the one-of-a-kind bedtime story podcast featured in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Buzzfeed, Mental Floss, and NOVA. Created in 2013, Sleep With Me combines the pain of insomnia with the relief of laughing and turns it into a unique storytelling podcast. Through Sleep With Me, Drew has dedicated himself to help those who feel alone in the deep dark night and just need someone to tell them a bedtime story.