931 – The Heiress | Mandoborian on Mandalorian Chapter 11
This episode will be as warm as a baby's bath as comforting as bowl of chowder.
931 – The Heiress | Mandoborian on Mandalorian Chapter 11
[START OF RECORDING]
SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Yodish beings, and frog…Yodish and frog-based beings everywhere…maybe I’ll talk about amphibians. It’s been a…amphibians, it’s been a while since you listened to the podcast because obviously you need a IPX-rated speaker to do that. I mean, come on. But it’s…you say, what is this person talking about? Well, it’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep, the podcast that puts you to sleep, patrons.
INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever is keeping you awake, whether it’s thoughts, things on your mind, so thoughts you’re thinking about. Thoughts, feelings, any emotions coming up, so thoughts about the past, present, or future, feelings about the past, present, future, or just that are there that you’re feeling. That’s why they call them feelings.
Feelings, physical sensations, changes in time or temperature or routine whether…whatever. Whatever’s going on, it’s…whatever’s keeping you awake, I’m here to take your mind off of it. What I propose to do is create a safe place where you could set all that stuff aside at the door or you could bring it with you and just set it as your side. You don’t have to set it aside literally. I guess that’s actually the right word of…you could figuratively or you could actually set it to your side, set it nearby. You said well, no, I prefer it…I’d say don’t worry, we got it set up. Maybe you’ve heard of in the past, a long time ago, or recently; who knows? I don’t remember this stuff well; we did design cubbies and did I…here’s the thing, I just realized that cubbies and cubs…cute cartoons cubbies…there’s also…the Chicago Cubs are called the Cubbies.
If you’re a Cubs fan, we have Cub-based cubbies and then if you say well, I’m not a Cubs fan…I’d say, what do you mean? Come on, don’t you root for the…don’t you have some Cub fan…Cub…you say, I’m not sure what you’re talking about. I say well, okay, well, we have…we don’t only have Cub-based cubbies. We have cubbies that look like cubs, we have a drink, a bedtime drink called a Cup of Cubbie which took us a while to think of it. We said well, it’s gotta be a well-organized drink. What do you call that? Not perforated. What do you call that when it’s divided but it’s not divided? They said, I don’t know. I said well, a Cup of Cubbie. I say, a bit like a Fuzzy Navel. No, no, no, not an…well, because then you say well, what kind of…there’s almost a pun in there.
What does a cub drink or what do you drink out of a cub’s belly? Nothing, by the way; that’s the answer to that question. Oh, sorry, I was gonna try to create a…so, we have cubbies which also…or lockers. Yeah, you can use…you can’t use those interchange…we have interchangeable lockers which are cool, and lockers within interchangeable things on the inside. ‘Cause you say well, I’d like to make my locker…section it off into some cubbies. I say don’t worry, we also have shelving. We have floor space ‘cause some people say, I’ll just put in on the floor. I don’t need a…I say don’t worry. Yeah, we got that too. You can do that. We’ll be ready for you. Oh, so, I’m gonna try to create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake.
One of the ways I do that is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, superfluous tangents. I go off-topic, I get mixed up, then I get confused, then I go on a…I say well, confuse…a profusion of confusion. That was a tangent I’ve gone on in my life. Then I’ll talk about that, then I’ll circle back. But it’s all to keep you company as you drift off. A couple other things to know if you’re new; a lot of important things to know…new. One thing I always tell you if you’re new or newish is you could always skip the intro. Some people start the show at twenty minutes, twenty-two minutes; like, about 2% of people ‘cause they want to get to the story part.
But just skip the intro after you’ve listened for…you’ve listened to the intro…if you say well, I like the show; I don’t like the intro, then start skipping ahead because you never know. The intro became this way because of listener feedback, and not just listener feedback over a couple weeks; like, years and years and years of listener feedback. I wouldn’t say it’s been studied but it’s also studied that 2% of people skip the intro, then a few thousand people listen to the story-only episodes on Patreon. That’s another option. You can’t really…then people say well, why does it have to have ads? It’s because so it’s free, and otherwise it would be behind one of the services that either…that’s just the choice I make, is if the podcast is free and listener and ad-supported, that’s how I can reach the most people at the minimal cost to the user.
That’s that. Okay, oh, so..oh, those are a couple things. So, you can skip the intro but I don’t want you missing out, either. I mean, you might…this is one thing; I said I don’t want you missing out on something you’re gonna fall asleep to and not listen to. It sounds strange but it’s just based on what I hear from listeners. So, there’s that. Oh, if you’re skeptical — this kinda goes along with it — or you’re doubtful when you’re new to the show, that makes total sense, or if you say I don’t know if I like this Scooter character…I can’t believe my grandmother, someone I went to the…a dance with and my roommate’s cousin all recommended the same podcast. I’m not sure I like it. That’s a totally…that’s…the majority of people react that way. Skeptical; what do you mean you’re gonna put me to sleep?
What are you talking about? Or, they like this guy? Those are normal. I’m not defensive at all. Those are totally normal, legitimate reactions, and common. I just want to tell you if you’re feeling that way, totally normal. The only thing I’ll tell you is that a large number of feedback…I mean, in the millions of people have told me that it took a few tries to get used to it. Maybe that’s overstating things, but if you hear from one person out of every hundred, then yeah, it’s in the millions for sure. Give it a few tries and see how it goes. The podcast is free, so just test it out a couple nights and then see if it works for you or not, or if that skepticism wanes or whatever. That’s the other thing to know. Also, this podcast is not here to put you to sleep, really.
It’s more here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff, to be your companion, your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-cuz, your bore-sib, your bore-bestie, your bore-bruh, then to be…I don’t know if I want to say we’re like the lily pad that the frog sits upon. We’re not the frog that…we’re like the lily pad, but I’m not sure about that ‘cause it doesn’t make any sense. It just popped in my head. I thought I’d say it. Literally, I saw a…it said we’re the lily pad the frog sits on. I said, what are you, the Reggie Jackson of sleep metaphors? I say, I don’t understand what you’re saying. I say no, don’t worry. Oh, if you’re…oh, so don’t really…this podcast doesn’t really put you to sleep. It’s here; that’s why the shows are about an hour, to give you plenty of time to drift off at your leisure.
Then if you can’t sleep, whether it’s situationally or you just can’t sleep, I’m here to keep you company. I’m gonna be here to the very end and you can queue up episode after episode after episode if you need companionship in the deep, dark night. That’s part of my job, so I’ll be here to keep you company whether you’re awake or asleep. A couple of other things to know; this show…oh, so, I’m gonna…don’t…oh, don’t listen to me. That’s the other thing. I’m not here to put you to sleep but I’m not here to be listened to. This is a podcast you barely pay attention to. Like I said, I don’t want you missing out on your opportunity not to pay any attention to me and barely listen by skipping the story, but you can do that. Then you say oh, okay, that’s what I prefer. There’s that. Those are two things.
The other thing is the structure of the show which I said kinda with the intro, but I’ll now explain a little bit more detail. That can throw people off. The show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, frog-based beings, Yodish [00:10:00] friends, Jedis, everybody. Lily pads. Talk about a good listener. That’s one of the most underrated listeners on the planet, is a lily pad. They have…someone said they can’t…they’re not hearing you. I said well, first of all, they are. They can receive sound waves and water waves, by the way. They may not be listening to me but that doesn’t make them any different than the people in my life or the people that listen to this podcast. Oh, what was my point? Oh, structure of the show.
It starts off with a greeting so you know you’re welcome here. Then there’s business. That’s how we’ll keep the podcast free, then there’s the intro. Now, the intro’s somewhere right around now, between the greeting, the ads, and the intro is like, twenty to twenty-six minutes or something. I don’t know, when I record it, it’s different, but I guess that’s kinda how it comes out in the end. So, but the intro serves a really important purpose other than introducing new people to the podcast; it gives you some wind-down time. That’s why it developed this way is because if I just start the story, then you gotta think about well, the story…when…how…I gotta fall asleep before the story ends. I don’t want you to have to worry about that.
There’s this nice wind-down or landing time where you can either be in bed getting comfortable, be in bed falling asleep, or getting ready for bed or doing some other relaxing activity even if it’s just laying there chillaxing. Playing with chillaxing figures, we invented that. Then we…they said, don’t use chillaxing in the podcast anymore. I said, I’ll try to remember that, but…so, that’s what the…the intro’s just to ease you into bedtime. That’s my point. But yeah, it’s not for everybody. Then there’s business between the intro and the story. That’s how a podcast structure works. I say well, that’s where the ads go. Then there’s that, and then there’s our recap of the Mandaborian. Mandaborian on Mandalorian.
This time, I really…I just recorded the episode and I managed to talk about it longer than the episode which is…that’s always an accomplishment. It’s something I’m pretty proud of. I talked about…according to the recorder, I talked about a thirty-four-minute episode for like, fifty-four minutes or something. Now, some of that will be edited out, dead air or whatever, or…but that’s pretty good. Then there’s thank-yous at the end. That’s the structure of the show. The other thing to know is the reason I make this podcast is because you deserve a good night’s sleep. You deserve a place where you can get some respite and some rest so that you can live your life in a more full way tomorrow.
If I can make sleep less of a hassle, less of a rigmarole, something you don’t dread, that’s my goal because I’ve been there. The other thing is I know how it feels tossing, turning, mind racing, trouble getting to sleep, trouble staying asleep. Yep, I’ve dealt with all those things. Yeah, that’s why I’m here. That’s why I make the show. One way to view it is a bit like a lily pad; you say okay, Sleep With Me is probably…you say what natural thing this week are you gonna compare the show to? I’d say well, a lily pad. Functional, first of all. You know, it’s good for sitting. It’s great for looking at. Aesthetically, I wouldn’t say…now, a lily pad with a lily; that’s different. This is just a lily pad. You could say it’s…I mean, I would say it’s aesthetically pleasing.
Not all lily pads are, so I would say yeah, we’re a little bit on the lily pad that’s been in the sun and somehow sunk its roots into a place…you say well, that lily pad is not getting the maximum amount of nutrients like all…some of the other ones, but it’s still a healthy lily pad. I’d say, it’s a creaky, dulcet lily pad for sure. Somewhat passive. You say well, what’s a lily pad do? It kinda just sits there. You could look at it. Also frogs, dragonflies, other…I don’t know if a…here’s a question that’s never come up; hey water striders, you need a break anytime? Let me know. We’ve had fictional water striders on the podcast before but hey, if I was a lily pad, I’d say hey, water strider, come on over. Sit down or whatever. I don’t know what you do to relax but if you’d like to…I’ve never seen a water strider relax.
They say Scoots, what natural animal are you most like? I’d say, probably a water strider. The water strider says hey bub, have you ever tried walking on water? The only other person to do it is a transcendent being. I’d say well, I’m aware of that but well, one time I saw…I had these…I saw at a garbage thing, a dump, they call it, these Styrofoam water shoes. I got those and I fell down a lot, so it can’t be easy. But yeah. I’m just saying if you want a break, I’m here as a lily pad or a person. You could…I mean, you don’t have any protuberances or anything. You could hop on my skin if you want. But just an offer to water striders everywhere; not all of you at once, of course, please, no; that I can only accommodate…that’s just more of a polite way of saying it.
If I meet a water…first, there will probably be an application process. If I was…figuratively as a lily pad, it’s fine. I’m just more…you say oh, this…hey, Scoots, this is the International Water Strider Association. We’re the lobbying group for water striders. We heard of your offer on the podcast and we consider it a legal compact, so we’ll be moving in. Moving in where? On you. We’re gonna be living on you now. Scoots-striders, we’ll be calling ourselves. I’d say well, I don’t think…maybe before you want to try…maybe you send some representatives to try it out ‘cause I can’t recommend…I mean, I don’t know. There’s not a lot…I’m not…I don’t have a high strideability, either. I mean, I can stride with…striding with the striders, though.
This is our friend Summer who made a documentary about the podcast and has a idea for a new doc. Just made me think about the possible subject if Summer’s listening. Say, Striding with the…we could think of a group called The Striders; Striding with the Striders. I don’t know. If you’re new, you say what happened? This person was trying to introduce the podcast and then they…I say well, that’s how I’m like a lily pad. Also, a lily pad, like I said, is a great thing to talk to. If you say well, I gotta get something off my chest but I’m not really ready for a human or even maybe a being that could look at me yet. I mean, maybe I’d try a toad or a frog later. Yes, I’d start with a lily pad because people…the people that don’t get it would say a lily pad can’t hear you.
But I’d say a lily pad’s like an…it is like a…it’s…it could hear you. It can feel your sound waves. There’s no doubt about it. Even science would back me up on this. You might have to…you don’t need to talk that close. Don’t close-talk a lily pad right away. Also, probably not the best idea because it’s so exposed, but I think…remind me this summer when I…if I finally get out of where I am, I’m gonna kiss a lily pad. I’m gonna do it. I mean, I’m gonna do it. If you’re a scientist, let me know. Say Scoots, please don’t kiss any lily pads. This is the Lily Pad Council of the World. Please don’t kiss any lily pads. I’d say well, yeah, I’ll bring some Purell or something. They say no, please don’t put Purell…as the International Council of Lily Pads, we’ve decreed you not a friend of lily pads.
I say well, I was just talking ideas. How about if I kiss my fingers and then touch-kiss you? Whatever that…well, I’ll blow you a…let’s just agree on this; this summer I’ll blow lily pads kisses nonstop. Talk about…this is 2020 when I’m recording this, but if you say Scoots, how do you see 2021 going in a cartoonish fashion? Mid…third-quarter..mid-to-late 2021; that’s me in a boat blowing kisses to lily pads. That’s what I’m looking forward to doing in 2021. ‘08, 2021. You say Scoots, yeah, if everything goes good, what’ll it be? International travel, jet planes, extreme sports? No; in a boat blowing kisses to lily pads and talking to them. Probably at that point I’ll be serenading them and working on my new program for water striders. Give them a break. Probably we’ll have some signs or something.
Slow your wake; give…[00:20:00] ’cause, you know, if you live in a…if you’ve ever been in a boat zone where people park their boats and stuff, it says Slow your Wake. Then sometimes people…hey, give the water striders a break; slow your wake. I would also put in an F-R-I-G-G-I-N. Let me know. Maybe Bernie can do an episode about that. Anyway, I’m glad you’re here. I work really hard and I yearn and I strive. I want to help you fall asleep. I appreciate you checking the podcast out, and here’s a couple ways I’m able to do this for you twice a week.
Alright everybody, it’s Scoots here. I’m loading up the old…the…do the people call it the Plus? I don’t think so. You watching the Max or the Plus, man? Well, the Plus right now. That’s what Mandalorian’s on. Actually, there’s Max and doesn’t the other…isn’t there more than one service with a plus at the end? Okay, so I’m getting this…getting ready to go. Chapter 11, Episode 3, Season Two. Disney+ has the Disney+ thing to start out. I gotta turn down my…it says…the teaser thing says the Mandalorian braves high seas and meets unexpected allies. I guess that’s the teaser ‘cause you say well, technically that happened, but unexpected…I think I’d expect them to be allies, but we go through the last time on our recap; this is the way, of course. Oh boy, is it.
Oso messing around, the frog beings, the X-Wings, the sliding, the snow, the ferns, the sentient ferns. Who could forget those sentient fern…the sentient fern families? Or was it one family? Helmet never been removed, never. This is the way. Covert is close. No hyperdrive. Last episode. Chase, crash, ferns saved, limp to Trask. Crazy in cockpit. That was one of the last things they say. Gonna have to get cozy in the cockpit; not crazy. Crazy and cozy in the cockpit. Something land-ride, waffle. Oh, that doesn’t say land-ride waffle. It says Lucasfilm, then we get the Star Wars thingamajig. Then I said holy gas giant, because…excuse me, because there’s a giant gas giant on the screen. It’s looking good. Then we see a green-blue planet underneath the gas giant.
I would love to know how much it costs to have…I mean, my brother’s in visual arts, but to have something like that made, this gas giant. Then, yeah, the Earth-like planet. We hear the horn-style Mando music. Oso’s sleeping in lotus mode. Frog-woman’s sleeping with her spawn. Alarm goes off, Mandalorian sleeps, wakes up, sees Earth. Oso wakes up, frog-woman wakes up. Mando says okay, great news; that time, the alarm went off with good news. We’re gonna land here. Then he says…he uses a bad word in his…I don’t know if it’s in Mandalorian. He says dang fargit. Let me see what he really says in the…dank farrik. Dank farrik sounds like something you’d smoke before you listen to Sleep With Me, if you’re…anyway.
Then horn…resources…I don’t know what that means, ‘cause that’s wrong. Guru mode; Yoda’s sleeping in guru mode. Then, yeah, we made it. Then as baby…oh, then it’s holy re-entry, going in hot. Mando needs the frog-woman’s hands, so she has to put her eggs down. It’s a bumpy ride. She has to hold the lever back. I noticed Mando’s strapped in, I think. Oh maybe not; maybe that’s just his cape, his cloak. Levar bath, eggs shake…oh, lever back, action music. Then they go in. They’re saying hey, slow down. This is a port; what are you doing? Slow it down, please. Reverse engine thrusters. Again, example of..in a small way, great storytelling because it really twists your expectations on its head a couple times. They say, slow down. He says, almost there. Razor Crest, do you copy?
You gotta slow it down; too fast. Then Mando hits the brakes and manages to land perfect…almost perfectly as the Mon Calamari looks on. Then it goes off the…he has a engine stall out and he goes into the drink. Trying my best, brace, hold on, almost there. Reduce speed, too fast. Save the day, Mon Calamari face. Nice and easy. Razor Crest overboard. Then we see the title card, The Heiress, Chapter 9. Chapter 11. Then the Razor Crest gets fished out of the water by an anti-walker crane. I don’t know if it was a re-purposed anti-walker or they always had cranes like that. It would make sense where they are. But like, a port…a crane you’d see in port but with legs. Let’s see, pulls him out of the water. Lots of water. Frog-woman’s off the ship pretty fast.
Mando says, can you fix it to the Mon Calamari. How can I help you? Can you fix my ship? No. Can’t do it man, but I can make it fly. Mando says here’s my…he says yeah, okay, I can put some gas in it if it still holds gas. Yoda’s in his pram. Very waterfront dock-style scene. Very busy. Frog-woman’s looking for someone. Then all of a sudden…such…this is…talk about heartwarming. Oh my goodness, for a cold-blooded…I don’t know if frogs are cold-blooded, but my heart was warm. Also, a lot of amazing costuming, like caps and sweaters and stuff. But the frog-husband appears and they embrace. They have these huge smiles. So much love. They smile, they hug. I could be projecting that they’re not smiling, but you say Sleestak; I call them Joystak, man. This is a stack of joy, these two.
They touch each other’s faces, they touch each other’s snouts. They touch the…Mando says, you can’t be fertilizing spawn on the dock front because it just wouldn’t…they say yeah, we gotta get home. Thanks so much. The greener frog says…then Mando says what about helping me find some Mandalorians? He says yeah, over there. Mando says, the inn over there? He goes, that’s what I said in frog. Then we see a mysterious cloaked character watching Mando. To me, they seemed like a wizard. I said wow, there’s a wizard watching. But then they’re gone when Mando notices them. They vanish away. He says, huh. Anyway, I gotta get to the…so, he…the frogs walk off. They’re kinda holding hands. They look back at Mando and the floating pram. Oso’s in the floating pram.
They go to a chowder house. What does this say? A cloaked woman watches, vanishes. They’re at a chowder house getting chowder. Oh, the frogs go with him. They say yeah, this is the place. Alright, we gotta go ‘cause we got frog-related…we’ve…we got…nature’s calling. The frog said, and nature’s calling. We gotta go; not go to the restroom. Then the chowder house…the proprietor says have a seat. What can I get you? Mando’s cool as a Mando can be and not cool if you own an inn. He says, this kid needs to eat. Get him some, whatever, your finest food. He goes, and you? Nothing for me, thanks. Maybe he could have ordered to go, but the guy says you can’t sit down if you don’t order. Which, I remember doing this…not to go on a tangent, but this was once upon a time.
I’m not gonna name any names, but there’s a famous place in San Francisco for Irish coffee. This is when I would indulge. I had two friends visiting. I believe it was two friends, who…and they were visiting. Or maybe it was one friend visiting and another friend that lived here. That was one of the places you take people that enjoy adult beverages when they’re in San Francisco. You’d say hey, this is famous for…it’s where Irish coffee claimed to be invented, or I don’t know. We went there during the [00:30:00] day on a weekday, but even then it’s very busy. It’s really a place for tourists. I guess some people hang out there, but…and they depend on the tourist business. They try to turn over their tables or maximize it, especially if you’re a serving staff trying to make the most money you can.
We had gone there to have Irish coffee, or I guess I did because that was my primary motivator back then, was anything with…but so, my…both my friends — I remember this — we sat down and again, I guess when you’re in a tourist area, anywhere we could sit down and catch our breath was always nice, too. Also, the staff, at least in my opinion, could be surly but not…we took three open seats not at the bar but at a secondary area. She said yeah, what’ll you have? I said well, I’ll have Irish coffee and…maybe I ordered two things. Then they said I’m fine, I’m fine. She looked at me and she goes no, no, no. Just like that, she said no, no, no, you can’t sit…and I said okay, three Irish coffees, please. But so, I don’t know. I guess that story…it’s a sleep podcast story. All was well.
But this guy says he can’t sit here if you…anyone that takes a seat has to eat something. Mando goes, I got ice money, man. Whatever that was called; I forgot the name of the Mon Calamari cash. He says, I’m looking for…I can buy something else. Not food; information. He goes, I’m looking for other people like me. The Mon Calamari goes oh, okay, let me…well, first, let me get some chowder from the ceiling. He goes yeah, others with Beskar have been through here. Mando goes, who can take me? He goes, I’ll find someone. Don’t worry. Oso gets some food which was a bit like a chowder gruel, but it was still a thing…then, oh, then the Mon Calamari goes to a squid-person. A lot of different type of squid beings in this episode. Yeah, this person’s a squid-person.
Strangely enough, Oso’s having calamari. He needs help cutting it up into little bits though, which his dad does for him. The squid-person sits down. They say yeah, have you…you’re looking for somebody like you? Oh, yeah, I’ve seen Amai. He’s got a sea-faring…he goes, a few hour’s sail on me boat. It’ll cost you, though. It goes, dun-dun-dun. Then we see this cool trawler straight out of the movie Westworld. Really…number 4B, I guess it says on the side. But yeah, the last time I saw Westworld was at, you know, during the Westworld stunt show that once upon a time Mark Gagliardi was in. But that wasn’t that long ago; maybe a year or two ago. A year and a half ago, maybe? But yeah, they’re on the ship. It’s a fishing ship. Mama corn eat…I don’t know what that means. I’ll have to look that up.
Child might like it. But yeah, it’s a fishing ship. Everybody’s working except for…Mando and Oso are looking over the side. Yeah, they say…they’re saying yeah, get over there, get that rope, move that stuff, grab a hook. Mamacore…goes, you want to see a mamacore eat? Quite a sight. Child might like it. Oso goes, I like to eat. Of course I do. He goes, no pressure. Take a look. It’s in a book right over here. He goes, close enough; look. Then they’re feeding this…they have a boat within a…a pool within a ship. Then they drop some fish in there. It bubbles up. They say oh boy, she must be hungry. Usually we feed her in the morning but missed that. Then suddenly it changes and it gets interesting because it’s…they say…unexpectedly, you hear Jeff…one of the squid-people doing a imitation of Jeff Probst, so shout-out to Robin Wiggles.
But they say previously on Survivor…and then they do…they just do a quick one. They do…yeah, for this challenge, it was featured in, whatever, seasons 4, 6, and 44. I don’t know. Then the Mandalorian says, what are you doing? I’m not here to be a part of…goes, I didn’t even sign a release and definitely I didn’t sign one for my kid to compete in a…they say oh, you gotta pay…whoever competes can win their fare on the boat. It’s fun and games. Also, we’re not giving you a choice because if you don’t win the competition, we’re gonna take your armor. I guess Oso…or Mando’s armor is not waterproof. Let’s see, Mando in the tub…yeah, so…now, we now see Oso, so we said we don’t know…I think Oso’s not planning on being in the competition.
All of them are more booing instead of…then Jeff Probst says dig, Mando, dig. Come on. Don’t give up, all that kinda stuff. It was just…that was a close…I said that was cool that they had Jeff Probst voice a character, or maybe he was playing one of the characters, like he was in makeup. Oh, also, that industrial music that I love starts playing in the background. I think that it’s the sound…the sweet sounds of Beskar steel or Beskar armor firing up, because what to my wondrous eyes does appear but three people clad in Mandalorian…blueish Mandalorian armor. They say this is an…first they say by the way, first of all, this is from CBS; desist. You don’t have the rights to do a Survivor show on this Trask or any other planet. Secondly, you don’t have proper releases. Then the squid people say we don’t care.
This is a underground TV…reality TV show. They go, we’re about to show you a reality show called So You Think You Can Dance Your Way Right Off This Boat? They dance their way off the boat, all the squid people. They say well, you’re squids; you might as well swim. We’ll take this boat over because this was all rude behavior. Really great action sequence of dancing and love of things. Then they get Mando out of the water. He goes yeah, there’s…goes, the child. Someone dives in. Goes, I haven’t seen Oso, the child. They go don’t worry, brother, we got this. Mando’s out of breath. A weak spot in the Mandalorian, we discover. Other than his…to have to love. Then the…one of the new…the new blue Mandalorian people comes with the floating pram.
Oso had locked it up, so he’s in there but he says papa, what was that? Mando says, we don’t even watch Survivor yet. He’s too young. He goes by the way, I’ve been looking for more of our kind. This is interesting. What’s interesting; his thing is like, the child…have you gone back to popping? Thank you. You’ve been searching? What’s the stay…the hill? That’s my writing, but let’s see what they say here in the dialogue. I’ve been searching for our kind. Well, you’re lucky we found you. Quested…I gotta deliver this child. I was hoping…all of a sudden they take off their armor, or their helmets. I said, what in the name of so say we all? A reddish-haired Starbuck is what I…to my wondrous eyes did it next appear.
But really, it’s not Starbuck ‘cause that’s a different show, and two other…one was a cloaked…the cloaked woman. One was the cloaked person and then a new person. They’re kind of checking Mando and the baby out. Mando’s confused. Where’d you get that armor? The lead says it’s been in my family. You’re not Mandalorian. You can’t…you gotta cover your face. [00:40:00] Then the guy says he’s one of them, a zealot. Then she says dank farrik too, like the swear word. One of what? He says. She goes, I’m Bo-Katan of…I was born on the…on Mandalore before the Purge; Clan Kryze or something. I fought in the Purge. Last of my line. You’re a Child of the Watch. He goes, never heard of it; Watch.
She goes, a little bit of a zealot that broke away from Mandalorian society to reestablish the ancient way. Then she looks at Oso and Mandalorian goes, there’s only one way; the way of the Mandalore. He gets in her face and then walks off. He’s cold as usual, cold and unresponsive. There’s multiple looks. This is at thirteen minutes. Bo-Katan gives a look and the two people with her give serious looks. They all exchange these looks like, what…who is this dude? But he flies off. Then the sun sets. They fly off and they actually take the ship out because they say this is not unauthorized production of a CBS show. It can’t be…exist on Disney+, so we gotta take that out. Then we see the moon rise on the docks.
Mando’s walking with his baby, just him and his child having a nice moonlit walk on the docks alone until people say yo, what’s up with my brother? You were supposed to go fishing with him. That’s a squid-based being. He says, heard you broke up his underground production of the TV show Survivor, Trask Edition. Mando goes, none of your business. They go, we don’t think you understand. This is…we don’t have TV here except for local productions. We were looking forward to this week’s episode and now we don’t get to see it or any other episodes. We’re gonna have to film another episode right here on the docks without your permission. Next thing you know, Bo-Katan and the crew show up. They handle it. Mandalorian doesn’t even have to do anything.
They have blue armor with some spray decorations, a little bit more form-fitting. Some two-toned stuff. Obviously they take their helmets off. Two of their helmets have antennae; maybe all three of them do. Then they’re at the…they’re at another restaurant, not the chowder house. They say, why don’t we have dinner together or something, or why don’t you buy us a drink? Mando goes, okay. This kid eats all the time, anyway. They say well, let us buy you a drink. Then Bo-Katan says Trask is where people are selling stuff underground and old Empire stuff. Plunders of Mandalore are being sold. We’re gonna seize those and retake our home planet. Once we’ve done that, we’ll seat a new Mandalore on the throne. Mandalorian goes no, no, no, Mandalore’s cursed. Don’t you know that?
I guess she’s the heiress. He goes yeah, the planet’s cursed. Anyone who goes there, bad luck for life. Once the Empire knew they couldn’t control it, they put a curse on it. Bo-Katan goes, cursed? You believe everything you read, man? He goes no, I read it online; not in a book. She goes, that’s them trying to keep us separate. We’re stronger together, Mandalorians. He goes, not part of my plan. I got other stuff going on. I gotta deal with this kid, so sorry, I pass; quested to return this child to the Jedi. She says, what do you know of the Jedi? He goes, nothing. Can you help me? He goes, aren’t you supposed to do that by creed anyway? Then one of the other of her Mandalorian people is having noodles. Oso’s watching like ooh, those noodles look good.
Oso’s watching, then the Mandalorian says I hope you could help me by creed. He even says ooh, noodles. They go, help you by creed? Hm, I can lead you to someone, a Jedi. But you have to help me on our mission. He goes, mission? She raises her eyebrows. Then they go and they’re looking at a freighter, old Empire freighter loaded with stuff, supposed to depart at first light. We’re gonna catch…we’re gonna take everything on there and empty it out. He says, stowaway? They go no, they know that move, so we gotta do another move. He goes, four people? He goes, we’re gonna have to use surprise. She goes, yeah. I know what I’m doing. She also has a light-up hairpiece or helmet locker. She goes, the great thing is, this is port rules.
He goes, it has to stay in trawling speed while it’s in port, so we can fly up when it’s in the atmosphere and get on in the shipping lanes. Then it ascends into orbit and takes off. The tower won’t allow them…can’t go fast until…he goes yeah, is there any troopers on board? She goes, a squad or something. Then one of the other people says yeah, they don’t have very good aim, so don’t worry. Then the Mando knocks on a door, says I know Scoots like knocking. The frogs say don’t worry, you can come knocking. Nothing’s going on here anymore, so you didn’t miss anything. But he says, let’s see…Mando’s so matter of fact, Yoda likes the noodle. Help me by creed, trawling speed, airspace, lighter…oh, light-up hair sides. Knock, knock. Something’s come up, he says.
Are you done with the…then they say yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, I need you to watch the kid for a little while. They say, okay, I guess so. He goes hey, by the way, you’re gonna stay here with these frog people. Be respectful. Mind your manners. You know what I’m talking about. This time I actually have consequences or maybe they’ll give you consequences and I don’t have to do it. I’ll be back. Then Oso gets to see one of the hatchlings. He even opens his mouth in joy, I think. I hope. Next thing is we see…again, there’s a lot of good effects in this. We see the trawler take off. I don’t know, it’s just cool. I’ve never seen a trawler, space trawler, take off. It starts to head out of port real slow. We see a little bit of that slow flying.
We see it start to climb, then we see the Mandos in pursuit. They land on the roof. They slowly roll up on the stormtroopers, a couple of them. They say hey, hop off the ship while we’re close to ground. One of them manages to close the door. An alarm goes off. They say, is that Titus? What in the…more pirates. Very familiar face from movies and television. He says okay, guard everything. Seal the hatch. Let’s get ready to rumble. But he’s got a nervous look on his face. Then they’re trying to hack the door which they do. They say oh boy, they got the door open. Then it’s a dance-off against some of the…what do you call it? Some of them. We see kinda everybody in action. A lot of action sequences here. Laser tag, they call it.
It’s like a bit like hide-and-seek and tag together where you’re trying to aim the laser and it makes everybody go beep, beep, you’re out. They play that with the stormtroopers. The stormtroopers just aren’t as agile as…and confident. The Mandalorians, all four of them, are very confident and competent. They say, what’s going on? How many people are on board? Ten, twenty people? Then one of the pilots says no, there’s only four. Then they’re Mandalorians, though. Oh, boy. Everybody shares a look; oh, no. Not Mandalorians. They’re headed to the cargo bay and he goes, we gotta get moving, here. How long? They go yeah, we’re still in the harbor zone. We gotta follow the rules. The captain goes no, [00:50:00] or the admiral or whatever, Titus. He says, get it moving now.
They say okay, it’s against the rules but we’ll do it. It’s gonna make everybody mad. They pull up, then there’s more hide-and-seeking. Mandalorian has one of his thingamajigs. Oh, then it’s a smoke-poofer. They’re able to use their thermal imaging to get another advantage. But they head towards the cargo bay which is full of stormtroopers loading up. They say, what’s happening? Intruders on their way. Hold them off ‘til we jump into hyperspace. We’ll rendezvous with the fleet. They get ready for that. They’re waiting for the elevator which has three levels going up. One, going up two, going up to level three. Everybody’s ready but they’re not ready for…you know how it is. Then they’re closing another set of doors. Close all the doors, close any doors you can.
They close the Mandalorians in. The piloting…pilot and the…everybody’s listening. They say oh, great, we got them locked up. We think we closed them in between two sets of doors, so we got them. They go, trapped in where? In the cargo control area. Then there’s a slow dawning…in the cargo control…? Oh, boy. Then the cargo is controlled out of the ship. Then everybody gulps, like double-gulp, triple-gulp, holy gulp. Hello? Anybody there? No. No one’s there. The Mandalorians find all the…they take off their helmets. They say, this is all our stuff that got taken, so we’re taking it with us. They call the head of the ship ‘cause they say, do you copy? Bo-Katan says you bet I do. Thanks for giving me my gear. We’re gonna be in great shape with this stuff.
If you think…the captain says, you’re not gonna get away with that. He goes, even if you get rid of some of the crates, we’ll find you. She says oh, we’re not jetting it. We’re taking the ship. We’re not taking the stuff. Put some tea on; we’ll be up in a minute. Mandalorian says, what do you mean you’re taking the ship? This wasn’t part of the plan. She goes, there’s something I need if I am to rule Mandalore, something that was once mine. They know where it is and soon so will I. Either way, we’re taking the ship for the future. Mandalorian says, but we…I got the stuff you needed. I gotta find the foundling. Bo-Katan says if you want the Jedi, find a Jedi, you gotta help me find the ship…take the ship first. He goes, you’re changing the terms of the deal.
She goes, haven’t you seen any of the episodes of the series this season? Get used to it. This is the way. He goes, I guess she’s right. It is the way. Holy moly. My way and her way. Then the other Mandalorians walk by him as he sulks for a minute, but he has his helmet on. Then Moff Gideon calls the captain of the ship; what’s going on? It’s Moff Gideon here. He says yeah, we need some backup. Mandalorian pirates. He goes, did you get rid of them? No, that’s why we need backup now. He goes, the same pirates, huh? He goes yes, sir. He goes, how far have they gotten? They got everything but the bridge, so we need backup. Moff Gideon says well, it’s probably too late, then. No backup for you. You know what to do.
The two pilots look at each other and then Moff Gideon says, long live the Empire. The captain says, oh no. Then he says okay, you know what we gotta do, here. The two pilots eject. They say okay, see you. Then he says okay, I’m gonna bring it in for a landing, water-based landing. Bo-Katan says we gotta…we can’t let him land the ship. We gotta get back there, especially a water-based landing; we know you can’t swim very well, Mandalorian. But there’s also a backup squad of troopers with heavy repeating blasters. They go oh, what are we gonna do? Axe Woves and Koska Reeves are the other characters’ names, maybe? They say, how we’re pinned down…and they say, what are we gonna do? Mandalorian says…they go, we’re getting closer to landing.
He goes, they don’t give me shiny Beskar armor for nothing. He puts his Beskar armor to use and runs right up to the stormtroopers and says tag, you’re it. Then they say well, we’ve been tagged. We’ve already been brought…I’ve already been brought or whatever they say on shows. Then they get onto the deck of the ship…what do they call it? The bridge, and they say yeah, we’re on the bridge. Let me just see if I missed anything during that part. I don’t think so, though. Yeah, Mando sneaks up, tags the…tag, you’re it, or you’re out, in this case. A bit like a football player ‘cause they were like, throwing dodgeballs at him. All the Mandalorians are impressed ‘cause it was impressive. He says come on, let’s get to the front of the ship. Then they go back.
They bring the ship up from landing and they say captain, that was not right. Then Bo-Katan talks to the captain as he goes…she goes, where is it? He goes, where’s what? The dark sabre. Does he have it? He goes, if you’re asking, you already know. The Mandalorian and somebody else take the ship away from landing, back into space. Everybody’s out of breath and that was like, oh boy. Bo-Katan says listen, captain, I’ll…you gotta tell me. I’ll take care of you. He goes, he’ll take care of me. He goes, do you remember a band called Doctor Teeth and the Electric…Doctor Something and the Electric Teeth? He goes yeah, but how can you not remember the doctor’s name? He goes, I don’t know, but it was the Electric Teeth, right?
He sings his…he won’t stop singing this song, The Electric Teeth which is a little strange. He says, it’s all I’m gonna say for the rest of the show. I’m not gonna give you any answers. Then they say, we got…Koska Reeves said we gotta move because he sent out a distress signal or talked to somebody. Bo-Katan says are you gonna come with us or what? Mandalorian goes no, no, no. I gotta deal with this foundling. I left him with a couple of frogs that were…they go okay, let’s prepare to jump. You sure you don’t want to come with us? He goes, yeah. Something I need to do. Offer stands if you change your mind. Mandalorian says, where can I find the Jedi? She takes off her helmet and she says Calodan Corvus, Ahsoka Tano. Tell her you were sent by Bo-Katan. Ashoka Catano…whatever it is. Asho Cacano?
Let me see. I just started watching with my daughter some of the Star Wars Clone Wars things, so Ashoka Tano. I think that’s what it is. Let me see. Also, I just watched the Star Kid, a Star Wars musical. That was pretty…the…I don’t have the actor’s name that plays Darth Vader, but he’s really good. Calodan, forest planet of Corvus, Ahsoka Tano. Tell her you were sent by Bo-Katan. She was Anakin Skywalker’s padawan, at least in the Clone Wars, I think. That’s gonna be interesting to get back to. Your bravery will not be forgotten. This is the way. Mando says, this is the way. I can accept…he says actually, I think I can accept change of helmet-less beings. He jumps off the ship and does a little flying back to the port city.
Then we have cute baby…baby Yoda bathing one of the frog babies which is so cute, or helping bathe them. He’s so brusque, man. He goes…walks in; he says, thanks for watching the kid. Picks him up. He says, come on, kid, let’s go. That’s it. Okay kid, come on, [01:00:00] it’s time to go. While he’s still bathing him; let’s go, come on. He does say congratulations. Oso whines. He says no, no, no, we’re not taking a frog baby with us. They go back to his ship which is in the same condition he left it in which is a mess. Mando goes up to the Mon Calamari who’s got a fishing sweater on. He says, is that the best you could do? 10,000 credits or whatever? The guy goes sign here, man. He’s got waterproof overalls on…Mando…the Mon Calamari. Mando gets on.
There’s a lot of fishing…he fixed it; he just fixed it Mon Calamari style, so the…he redecorated the ship in like, what you’d do…way over…the accoutrements you would expect not in a Tiki bar, but a Tiki bar accoutrements, so not Tiki style, but fishing nets and fishing lines, and even a squid snack for baby Oso that Mandalorian has to handle. Again, he says don’t…let me cut your food up for you, kid. Maybe even a baby version of what was in the Survivor competition. It’s a bumpy ride. He says man, this ship is trashed. Baby Oso says oh boy, papa, what is this thing? Papa says don’t worry about it, kid. Then he says yeah, here’s…he goes yay, it’s lunchtime. They take off. There’s stuff falling off the ship. One thing falls off before they go into orbit and then after they go into orbit but before they go into hyperspace, something else falls off.
Let’s see, they’re above that…I don’t get another shot of the giant giant, but yeah, we see it lose one more piece. Then we get…Bryce Dallas Howard directed this episode. We get the whatever you call it, the…whatever, the concept art. We get a ship into port, the Razor Crest, then we get three Mandos as plate number two. Plate three is underwater cockpit shot. Plate four is Oso’s squid lunch, playing with his food. Plate five is the port at night. Let’s see what it is. Yeah, everybody working. Port at dusk, I’d say. Six is the Empire ship from the inside, the cargo hold. Seven is the fishing boat out at sea. Looks a little bit better on the concept art. Eight is a pram in water, pre-Survivor competition with special effects. It has a little water effect. Nine is another port shot of the Razor Crest.
Ten is Mando and the troopers. Eleven is Oso giving the frog a…actually, it’s after the frog had a bath. Looks like maybe he’s on Mando’s ship, hiding it, like he snuck a frog on there. We still have a few minutes. I thought…I didn’t do a step-by-step thing. Let me see if I could…how many minutes it is to do this. We can do a step-by-step thing of how to take a…yeah, I think we could do it. Oh no, that’s not it. Let’s see, how many minutes is this scene? It’s a little bit long but we’ll just do…how many steps to take a freighter. Step One; scout it out. Step Two; get a babysitter for your baby Oso. Step Three; watch it take off. Oh, Step Two A; make sure to tell your kid to behave. Step Four; use your jet pack. Land on the roof. Step Five; use…try to sneak up on them and get in as fast as you can.
Step Six; not fast enough. We gotta unlock the door. Hack the door is Step Seven. Step Eight; get ready. Have Bo-Katan — I think Bo-Katan — go in and do some super moves and out-dance three stormtroopers. Step Eight; walk with authority. Holy cow. You’d say we were strutting. Step Nine; laser tag. Out-laser-tag a group of stormtroopers. No problem because again, we walk with confidence. It might take us two or three trips of coverage. If you’re on the bridge, start worrying. Step Eleven; is that what we’re on? They adjust the height. Use a smoke screen and keep moving forward. Use our thermal imaging. Step Twelve; if you’re on the ship, you’re getting out-stepped. Take the elevator which I wouldn’t do. That’s something I would not put on in my step count.
Step Thirteen; let the elevator door open with no surprise, but we have Beskar armor, so we totally got moves. Step…I don’t know what step we’re on. Fourteen, Fifteen, Step Fifteen; get sealed in a room. Step Sixteen; realize these are not…obviously the Empire and post-Empire has loose hiring practices ‘cause who would want to join it anyway? They just locked us in the control room. Step, whatever, Sixteen; release the cargo and the cargo people. Escargot, as they say. Step Seventeen; check out the score. We also have to capture the ship. Step Eighteen; call in. Let him know to put hot tea on ‘cause we’re coming. Step Twenty; oh boy, they’re gonna land the ship so we gotta move faster. Step Twenty-One; pinned down by superior firepower. Oh, Step Twenty-A; Mando tries to back out. You gotta hold the information ‘til we have taken the ship.
Step Twenty or Twenty-One or something; go full-Mando. If you’re the Mandalorian, show that you’re the Mandalorian and gain access to the bridge. Step Twenty-One; pull the ship out of its dive so it doesn’t land. Step Twenty-Two; if you’re Bo-Katan, discuss Electric Teeth and say please…oh, too late. You’re only gonna sing Electric Teeth songs. Twenty-Three; level the ship back out. If you’re a Mandalorian, get the piece…if you’re the Mandalorian, get the pieces of information you need from Bo-Katan. Establish…we’ve…now end on brusque but good rapport. Step Twenty-Four; exit. That was our shortest step-by-step one ‘cause I did it post-haste, I guess. But yeah, that’s another episode of the Mandaborian on Mandalorian. Goodnight, everybody.
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