1423 – Grapes of Khan Part 1 | Snore Trek

Episode 1423 – Grapes of Khan Part 1 | Snore Trek

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster who…I mean, you could say I boringly but boldly go where few podcasters have ever meandered to, and tonight that’s what we’ll be doing. We’ll be covering part of a famous Star Trek movie, one of the great ones that is about…is tangentially related to one of my favorite singers. But yeah, you might say, okay, which one is it? Well, it’s tough to say. At the beginning of a podcast you could say…let’s see. I'll try to…I'll give you a couple hints. If you're new to the podcast, this kind of behavior is pretty standard for this sleep podcast. So, here; it’s a Original Series Star Trek movie. First hint; Grapes of…okay, and if you don't have it, there’s three words in it. That’s the first word, Grapes of. Okay, good work, good work. The third word is…I guess this is probably the sixth or seventh, 'cause it’s Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

 

So, the third word in my paradigm for this is James; actor, James…that’s actually not helpful. James, an actor named James who has a son named Scott; their last name, or rhymes with…okay, there was a movie; sounds like or kind of is a different…totally different spelling and meaning and not exactly the same sounds, but similar…very, very similar. It sounds very much like…there was a movie that I think Nicholas Cage or Cage was in where he flew…not the movie where he lived on the island off of…or he visited the island off of…so, maybe he wasn't in this movie. But it was a movie…these are all dated references. Anyway, welcome to Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do…we're here to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff. So, if you're new, this is a silly, little show meant to just hang out with you, take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep. It does take some getting used to for a lot of people; not everybody.

 

But give it a few tries, 'cause I'm just here to hang out with you for your benefit tonight so you could fall asleep or at least have some companionship and distraction. So, try it out. Sleep With Me; the only podcast where I say, try it out. See how it goes. That sounds fair enough. Yeah, I'll try to put you to sleep, 'cause I have trouble…I’ve had trouble sleeping my whole life. That’s why I make the show. So, what we got coming up here is support, then a long, meandering intro mean to ease you into bedtime, and then we’ll be covering probably fifty percent of this motion picture. All told, we’ll be here over an hour. If you're new, don't worry about the support part of the show. If you're a occasional…if you really…if you like this podcast but you only listen occasionally sometimes, you could always follow the show in your podcast app of choice. Try out some different independent podcast apps. That’s a way to help the podcast and the podcast community in general.

 

Comment on podcasts you listen to, or Sleep With Me, wherever…if there’s comments, or leave a nice review. Then if you say, well, I like this podcast even more, spread the word about the show. Let somebody know about it. It’s a free way to help every podcast you listen to. Just tell one person about the show. Share about it. Join our referral live streams. But if the podcast changes your life on a regular basis multiple nights a week for multiple years or months at a time, or you listen to multiple episodes a night or you fall asleep very fast on a regular basis, we really could…you're the listener I'm talking to that…I could use your support right now either supporting one of these sponsors or the show directly. But there’s all those other ways to help out the podcast as well. So, here you go.

 

Intro: Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I'm gonna do the rest. What I'm going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts on your mind, stuff you're thinking about, thoughts about the past, the present, the future…so, thoughts, it could be feelings related to those thoughts or feelings that are just making a bedtime appearance, physical sensations, maybe you have a change in time, your…the temperature, the season, your routine, your work schedule, or you work a different schedule, or a inconsistent schedule, you're travelling, you’ve got guests, or it’s something else, or you're just in the middle of it, right?

 

Or a lot of times for me, you just don't even know…you say, I followed all these rules and it’s still…I guess it’s a bit like the way this movie opens that we're gonna be covering a little bit of, where you say…like, I say, I followed all the protocols and the rules. How come it’s still not working out for me at bedtime? So, I guess someone else might say, well, just don't even…or, I'm beyond the rules and I say, oh, I don't know about…I don't think I am. Not that I follow them. I still…even if I don't color within the lines, I still do still need the line — I am aware of that — when I'm coloring. When I'm making art, I'm also not illustrate…I'm not just…there’s some things I'm talented at. That’s not one of them, but I am good at making titles. So, I'll either make a title and then try to draw something or collage something. Said, that fits the title, or do something and then create a title that fits. So, I still need the title or the…I still need my imagination. But what I'm…you know, I say, it’s okay to color outside the lines.

 

But I also say, okay, but these lines are also…is this…? Hold on. If you’ve been listening to this show a long time, do you think this is a sign of growth? Maybe growing up while I make this show…'cause normally I'm on one side or the other. Don't…I don't want any lines to follow. Please. Or I say, well, I wish I was…I wish I could follow the lines. My life would be…if I could color within the lines when I wanted to, all my problems would be fixed. But if I'm paying attention, I just heard myself say, huh, it’s…there’s kind of a plus side to both. I could see…wow. I was still able to make a sleep podcast even though I’ve had some sort of internal growth. You say, what kind of personal mile…? Could you run through your personal milestones for us? Like, more of your growth-based ones, your internal, personal-growth milestones. Well, yeah, there was the one time when I was trying to actually introduce a sleep podcast and then I got distracted.

 

Then I thought…I was trying to make a metaphor about something, maybe about not being able to get to sleep, and then I got distracted by the tests they give on…for Starfleet officers. Then I was thinking about coloring, then I was thinking about coloring within the lines, then I realized there is a benefit to having the lines to color within or without of, or in sync of. That was a pretty big moment for me. Oh, I gotta put…look, I put that researcher to sleep. Okay, so, whatever it is that’s keeping you awake…you may be wondering, even though I went on a pointless meander there, why would I even talk about what’s keeping you awake? I came here to escape that. This show is about a storytelling journey and distraction, and somewhat of a vacation, but this show really isn't a total escape. It exists within all of that. We're a part of the world, and that includes my internal world and maybe your internal world, too, or maybe you could get comfortable with that at some point.

 

Like, we're a safe place within that, within these worlds, where you could rest. So, when I talk about what’s keeping us awake, the reason I do that is because one of the things that brings people to the show is a sense that no one else really gets it, that they're on their own, and that no one understands what’s…like, what it’s like for them when they struggle. I don't know if that’s you. That’s not every person that comes to the show, but that’s what it’s like for me and that’s what it’s like for a lot of people that listen. The thing is that that’s only important because around here, you're allowed to be you, and we welcome that. The fact is that if you've been looking for a place to get some rest and some distraction, maybe this is the right place or maybe it’s not. But it’s important to point out you're welcome here and there are…we do have a shared understanding. You may say to yourself, this podcast guy does not understand.

 

There’s no way he could have experienced what it is that I'm dealing with, whatever it is that’s keeping me awake. I would say, okay, no, I can see that. The good news is there’s a lot of people listening around the world, really caring, welcoming people, that are welcoming you, and there’s some of them that are really rooting for you 'cause they’ve been through something similar, and they're holding that safe place even though it’s indirect and maybe tangential within the world. They're trying to send that safe place to you, like their…through their well wishes, 'cause they've been someplace very similar, and they do know what it’s like. They're like, hey, I hope this show can help you like it helped me, 'cause I'm really glad I found it…and that maybe if you become a regular listener, you get that experience.

 

I'm gonna get ready for bed, I'm gonna get in bed, get comfortable, listen to this meandering Scoots, and think fondly of somebody I don't even know, but I know we share that thing around bedtime that’s not that pleasant, and I hope that new person out there gets some relief from it, even if it’s just in this moment. That’s the heart of the podcast, because you deserve a bedtime where you could get the rest you need so your life is better tomorrow. You deserve a bedtime you don't have to dread, where it could at least have some sort of pleasant routine to it, that even if you don't look forward to it…you'll say, well, at least that guy is gonna go off topic a bunch and get mixed up, and he’s pleasant enough. Scooter; he’s not the best. He’s pleasant enough. This is the only place where that’s…I do a victory…did you just say I'm pleasant enough or pleasant enough? I'm gonna do a victory lap. Because while I may strive to be more than that, that’s a pretty great achievement around here.

 

Yeah, he’s not bad. Oh, did you just say I'm not bad? Thank you. That’s so nice of you to say. I say that, again, without snark or irony. It’s like, yeah, it’s not…that pod…Sleep With Me is not…it's not half bad. I mean, it’s kinda something. I say, holy cow, you're really…you really almost…I'm glad that Harris is watching me humble-brag here and saying, Scoots, you better move on, with his smile. It’s warming my heart right now. So, that’s why I make the show, to help you out. The thing is, if you get the rest you need on a regular basis, maybe you could be out there in the world flourishing. If you're flourishing in the world, that means our whole world’s a better place. That’s pretty nice. Now, the way the podcast works is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents. So, I go off topic, I get mixed up, I…I don't even know. All that stuff that happened earlier happens a lot, and then I find myself…I say, where did the…where did I even go off on that meander?

 

I don't even remember. So, that’s a part of the show, and that is one of the things; it does take some getting used to. My voice is not traditionally soothing. This show does not have any gongs or bells or tolls. I mean, occasionally there will be some counting down, but not in the traditionally-soothing sense. This show is kind of soothing, and it’s way more gooey than guru-y. When you first get here…I'm not sure what brought you here, but maybe you searched for the show, maybe you found it in a listing or somebody recommended it, but whatever it is that brought you here, you probably had some reasonable expectation of what the show was gonna be like, and it’s probably not what you expected. It is very different. It does take some getting used to. In fact, most people that support the show on Sleep With Me+ have told me, at first I didn't like you. I was like, what is this? Then I listened again, 'cause you asked…you said give it two or three tries, and then I said, huh.

 

Then on the third try I fell asleep or I realized I was comforted. Now, there are people that do get it right away, and it is a taste thing. I'm just not everybody’s cup of tea. It’s not a good fit for everybody. But give it a few tries. See how it goes. The good news is I'm really not…I'm only invested in helping you, not in you liking me, right? That’s okay if we're not a fit. I have a website set up just for that purpose; sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou. It’s not 'cause I'm like…it's not because I'm totally chill like Mr. Rogers or whatever. It’s like, oh, okay…because people do let me know in very strong terms how much they don't…how much we're not a fit. But that’s okay because I’ve been sleepless. I’ve tried tons of different stuff. So, the reality is I'm not a super-chill person. It’s just that I do want you to be able to get some sleep.

 

So, even if you don't like me, check out sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou instead of letting me know how strongly you don't like me, and you'll find a sleep podcast on there that might be a better fit, or sleep audio. Because in the end, if you're flourishing, it means our world’s a better place, even if you don't particularly like the show. It’s a cool thing to know that you might be out there and it wasn't a fit, and that you moved…you found something that worked for you. That means I did something positive for somebody that’s been uncomfortable in a way I’ve been uncomfortable, or not been able to get the sleep they want when they want it. So, that’s the important thing to know about the show; not everybody likes it. Give it a few tries. See how it goes. It’s also a podcast that you don't really listen to. You just kinda barely listen to it.

 

It’s like background noise, a TV on in the other room, a show streaming under your pillow, a party way, way down the street where you say, okay, it sounds like somebody’s having a party; far enough away where it’s not bothering me and I don't have FOMO or anything. It’s just, you're aware. You say, okay, there’s some…I think there’s some bass…there is some thumping bass going on. Again, this isn't snark, either. I tell you, every time I hear a thumping bass at a distance, I thay…I thay, thank goodness I make this podcast, 'cause I love it at the right distance. A rave going on down the street is a rave I could listen to while I'm lying in bed. Maybe I'm daydreaming. Maybe I'm drifting off. So, just having a podcast you don't really listen to is another thing that kinda defies expectations, 'cause you could listen to the show. You could pay attention to it. I'm here working and here to the very end, and I'll be describing as much of…ideally fifty percent of this movie as we can.

 

But yeah, let’s just see how it goes, right? What else? This is a podcast you don't really listen to. It’s also a sleep podcast that’s been around since before sleep podcasts were a thing, and there’s no pressure to fall asleep with this show. This show is not here to put you to sleep. It’s here to keep you company while you fall asleep. I'll say that again; there’s no pressure, no expectation, to fall asleep with this show. I'm here to hang with you, and then you suddenly drift off. For most of us, we’ve had that experience before, sometimes when we were trying to pay attention and sometimes…I don't know, that’s what always works for me when sleep creeps up on me and surprises me. Like, when I'm trying to get it, it’s just out of reach. So, for this show, you don't have to reach for anything. I'm here. I'm here to hang, and that’s why the episodes are over an hour.

 

Also, there’s people here who can't sleep at all or who need a break during the day, who need something to listen to while they work or study or when they wake up in the middle of the night. So, I'm here to the very end to keep everybody company whether you're awake or asleep, whether you need to listen to me or not, 'cause my job is to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your neigh-bore, your bore-bie, your boreman, your Boris Borelaf, your chairman of the boreds, bore-sib, bore-cuz, and your best bore-friend f’eva, to just be here on-call, talking for your…like something close to amusement that’s not quite amusing. The other thing to know…what’s the last thing? Okay, don't…most people don't like me. So, you don't listen to this podcast? It doesn't put you to sleep? Oh, structure of the show. I like to point out the structure of the show just in case you're new. There’s a lot of ways — especially with good podcasting apps — to kinda adjust how you listen.

 

But this particular version, the version that’s…or paying for it is optional, this free version that’s listener-supported and ad-supported is what benefits the most amount of people possible, and most of those people listen linearly. They wind down during the intro and they fall asleep during the episode. So, that’s the version we get to put out. If it was just part of a service or an app or something, a lot of people wouldn't get the rest we need or wouldn't get introduced to other sleep podcasts. So, the show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, so you feel seen and welcomed in. You say, okay, I could check that podcast out. I feel welcome here. Then there’s support so that paying for the show is optional. It really comes down to the people that benefit the most from the show support us and our sponsors. We’ll be around for as long as I can do this. It just comes down to those people.

 

Like, if you listen more than three times a week, more than three episodes a week, or if…the easiest thing is…does this podcast make my life a lot better on a regular basis? But otherwise you could just be along for the ride. There’s nothing wrong with that, whether you're temporarily here or you're just visiting, or you're like, hey, I need a ride right now for the next couple years; not in a place to do any of that. Okay, don't worry, we got you. So, that’s the support. Then there’s an intro which is separate from the support. It’s a show within a show, and the intro is meant to introduce what the podcast is, but it takes me fifteen minutes or twenty minutes, but I introduce it in a new way every time, but I follow a familiar structure so that you have some variety, you have some reassurance, and you say, okay, yeah, I know…it's just…and we all get to hang out together.

 

So, the intro gives you some freshness so that whatever keeps you awake can't quite adjust, but it’s also fifteen to twenty minutes 'cause most people are listening while they're getting ready for bed, winding down, doing some chill activity, or in bed getting comfortable. So, it’s kinda like our community time. There is a small percentage of people that fall asleep fast. We always try to get ahold of them, and then there’s some people who listen to Bedtime Stories from Sleep With Me, which is only stories, 'cause they don't like the intros, and that’s totally cool. If you don't like the intros or you don't like the ads or whatever, you can also get a ton of stuff on Sleep With Me+. But yeah, that’s…the intro is meant to ease you into bedtime, to be a part of your wind-down routine, because that’s what works for me most of the time, what I’ve seen research say works, is having a nice bedtime with something pleasant to start the process. So, that’s what the intro does.

 

Then after the intro will be support, and then there will be our coverage of that movie with…not James Caan, not Scott Caan, not Chaka Khan, but someone…and not the…and also, there will be feelings and feelings like in the movie The Grape…or the book The Grapes of. But it’s a Star Trek movie. We’ll be covering half…it's probably, in a large number of circles, one of the best if not the best Star Trek movies. Let’s just say it’s one of the best. I'll be…so, we’ll be here for about an hour, and I'm really glad you came by. Whether you're new or this is your 12,000th time listening to an episode of the show, I'm really glad you're here. I really hope I can help you out. Again, if you're new or you're just listening for…as you go through something, you don't have to worry about supporting the show. You could follow it in your podcast app. You could comment or like in your podcast app. You could spread the word about the show. Those are all free, low-lift ways to help the podcast. Then if the podcast changes your life, please consider supporting one of these sponsors or the show back directly for those positive changes in your life. Thanks.

 

Alright everybody, this is Scoots here, and we're gonna be watching The Grapes of Khan, Star Trek: The Original Motion Picture II, or Star Trek II: The Grapes of Khan. I don't know why I didn't think of that title earlier. I don't…I can't remember what I talked about in the intro 'cause I also split up the intro, 'cause I came up with an idea for…in the intro for a Trending Tuesday episode. But this is a really good film. Even on its own, I think it stands alone as a motion picture. If you know nothing about the Star Trek universe, I would be interested to hear your thoughts if you watch it. I haven't watched the whole thing 'cause I'm doing this in two parts. So, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen it, and I definitely had seen it when I was younger, and then I’ve seen it a couple times when I was in my cups phase, and I haven't seen it PCE, post-cups era, but I have watched the first half of the movie quite a few times now. I was just watching it yesterday and today again without taking notes or anything.

 

So, let me give it one more pleasure half-watch, 'cause it’s that good. I think what I'm gonna do is just go through the film with it on mute and no closed captions and talk about what I see, 'cause it’s like a couple mysteries, and I think I would rather people get to enjoy…I don't know. We’ll just do it a little differently, see how it goes, 'cause I have extensive notes. But then I'm like, well, so much…there’s so many good…the acting and the voice acting. You've got a lot of powerful voices and ways of delivering lines in this that are kinda key. So, I don't know, let me just run through it. I'm getting my app re-installed right now. The good thing is I'm gonna skip the first five minutes…they run through the titles and the credits, which are important, of course, and…but not necessarily to carrying you off into dreamland. I don't want to read any facts. I think this movie came out in 1982. I probably saw it in 19…I don't know, not when it came out. It was popular enough that they showed it around my birthday later, like eight years later, maybe?

 

Maybe six years later at a big theatre here, which didn't show movies all the time. We would…we went and saw it for my birthday. My dad took me and some friends. I think it was a matinee. I don't remember how full it was or anything like that. I just remember like, whoa boy, this is…and then we saw the movie that came after it, 'cause it kinda ends on a cliffhanger. So, yeah. So, I think you'll enjoy it if you check it out. Alright, so, at the end…the credits go through space, and yeah, we enjoy the trip through space. Nice stars. Then we go to the 23rd century. It’s the 21st century…so, is it 22…22 something or 24? I don't know. So, we're looking at the Enterprise. We see Spock. The first person on screen; Spock. Hello, Spock. Okay, then we hear and see…or we hear or see Uhura, then McCoy, then…man, I'm losing track. McCoy, Sulu, and there’s also computer screens, and then…you say, cheers, cheers to…is it Lieutenant Saavik? Let me just look up…some of this I like to get at least somewhat correct.

 

Saavik…Saavik. Kirstie Alley…now, we don't know exactly what they're talking about 'cause we're not following the things. We see a blinking light. Everybody’s looking up at it. Yeah, everybody does a lot of moving of their eyes in different directions. She lowers her eyelids. Uhura says, huh, let me check that. Saavik we see is a Vulcan. There’s another blinking light. What’s that blinking light on the ship? Kobayashi Maru; that’s another ship we're looking at inside a circle. If Scoots pauses it…we know it’s a fuel carrier, neutronic, Class III. Tau Ceti IV is where it’s registered amber. Co-hero Vance runs the ship. 81 crew, 300 passengers. Max cruise speed; warp factor 3, but it could go up to warp factor 6 briefly if it needs to. Then Saavik says, huh, okay. Spock says, wait a second, what? Then Sulu says, I'm sorry, could I look over my shoulder and ask you a question? He’s not sure about it. He kinda makes a face, but he tracks something. Oh yeah, we're gonna go into this circle.

 

We gotta go through this…it's kinda like a old-fashioned video game, Sulu says, or like Star Fox. Then Spock says, what, are you playing Star Fox? This is…everybody on the ship is like, this is no time to play Star Fox. Then everybody turns. Serious shots…then we have three birds, Klingon birds, on screen. Say, turn the lights out. This is no longer a game. Those are real. Are they real? Yeah, they're real enough. Oh boy, one’s got a red light and it’s pointing it at us, a laser pointer. Then there’s fireworks. Sulu says, I'm gonna leave. I don't want to watch the fireworks. Not Scotty…oh, then somebody else turns around, some nameless person. McCoy, right? He says, huh, I'm gonna lie down here. Spock then…Spock says, huh, I'm gonna lay down, but my lower back…Uhura’s sleeping, and then a door opens. This is the first big entrance, a legendary entrance. It makes me wonder how long it’s been since we’ve seen James T. Kirk, 'cause this is quite an entrance.

 

Lights, lights behind him, Saavik faces him…lights on her face. He’s got something under his arm. Hand may be in his pocket; we can't see. His profile is there. But it’s a profile we know, and we see it’s James T. Kirk carrying a book. Oh, his hands not in his pockets; he’s holding his belt, looking cool. Then we see…oh wait, this is doing…this is acting. Spock actually wasn't tired. He was pretending to be tired, and he dismisses everybody. But Saavik says, I'm not dismissed, am I? Bones is chilling on the floor like he’s posing for a photo. He says, if you like it, look longer, or something. They say, no, no, Bones, that’s not what we're here to do. Then Kirk wants to talk to Saavik. He stands behind her to talk to her and listen, and he’s on a stage of the ship above her. So, he wants to make sure she knows that he’s Commander James T. Kirk, formally, 'cause in this movie he’s Admiral James T. Kirk. Still has a book under his arms, which I already know what it is, so I could tell you later.

 

Then his original crew is all hanging, or the ones other than Spock. They seem nonplussed. Then there’s…he exits and says this facility is just for practice. He goes to get on a lift or something. Spock’s waiting for him. He’s like, Spock, I was about to start reading my book. What’s up? What’s up? My favorite Vulcan. Spock says, Vulcans don't have favorites. It’s interesting. Then there’s actually somebody cleaning up behind them. They're not on a starship. There’s trees outside. They're in some sort of walkway. Maybe they weren't even on a turbo lift. They're in some sort of lobby. They got ferns. It’s got a big globe, or maybe it’s a giant astrolab? Then he says, what do you think about the giant astrolab? I don't know, my man. What I was trying to explain to you is that the second level of Starfleet training command that’s revealed; shown, not told. But however Kirk leaves, Spock’s like, wait a second, what? Also, they have…a lot of times in the movies they upgrade the uniforms.

 

This one is particularly upgraded. It has mock turtlenecks, and not just any mock turtleneck; kinda like a ribbed mock…not even…it's not even a mock turtleneck; it’s a collar like a mock turtleneck, almost…I'd say a half-turtleneck. Say, it’s not…what is a mock turtleneck? Is that a…? I guess technically it’s like a loose half-turtleneck. This is like a circular collar, and…but, whatever…Kirk ends it with something that leaves Spock like, huh, I don't even know what to say about that. Then we go to this pad, and it’s like…I say, holy 1970s. Kirk’s chilling in this pad. It’s got a view of a bay. It could be the San Francisco Bay. He’s in tower, 'cause it’s a high view, and it’s twilight or something. It looks good out there. This place is well-decorated. Not a huge apartment but probably in a very nice area to be in, and well taken care of. A nice place, you'd say. He’s got a ship, though his carpet…he’s in…is he in lounge wear? He opens the door.

 

Who’s there but his best bud, McCoy, and McCoy hands him a gift and says, here you go. It’s a gift for you. I'm gonna take my jacket off, let myself in. McCoy looks like he’s headed out, like he’s gonna work on the jungle cruise as a skipper, but the 23rd century version of it. I think he has his underwear on his outside of his pants, or that’s just the look. He does have some nice green highlights to his clothes, though. He gives reading glasses to Kirk. Kirk goes, are these reading glasses or what? He goes, yeah, they're for reading. I see you got a book. Now you got reading glasses. I don't…reading glasses? Cheers. Reading glasses. They take a cheers. Kirk does not like the taste. He says, what is this? Like Fernet? He goes, it’s even better, 'cause I'd rather drink these reading glasses. McCoy says, you could if you want to. Kirk says, oh, I think I'll walk on my carpet here. I'm in a robe…a shirt like a robe and pants, slippers. I think he’s in Chelsea boots, actually.

 

He says, so, McCoy, is that your underwear on the outside of your pants or is that just a look? McCoy says, I'm gonna…you got one comfortable chair, he’s got a fireplace with curves…a curved fireplace. He says, I'm here to sit in front of your curved fireplace and your curved chair. He says, how come with these modern things, everything looks more comfortable? Kirk says, I'm not comfortable. He says, well, I'm in your comfortable chair. Why do I only have one comfortable chair? Well, I have another one, so I'll sit in it. It’s different, though, not curved. Then McCoy says, why do you have two comfortable chairs? What are you not telling me? He says, why don't you read with your reading glasses? He says, is there some…a resident…? He goes, no. My friend comes over and takes my first comfortable chair; I have a second comfortable chair. McCoy goes, are you sure that there’s not someone regularly sitting in this chair that’s not me?

 

Then we see space again, and we see a ship, NCL-1886. It’s not the Enterprise; a different class ship, or maybe it’s Enterprise class, different shape? It’s headed towards a dusty planet, a little bit like Jupiter. It’s got a lot of clouds. It’s got a sun. Who do we see but two…? Well, one actor who’s been on other episodes of Star Trek, including one of the greatest ones of all time, and his arms are not wide at this point, Temba, arms wide, but they could be. Paul Winfield, the great Paul Winfield, and Chekov is the other…his officer or his Spock, I guess. Paul Winfield’s character’s name is Terrell, and he’s in the captain’s chair. He’s like, let me stand up here. Let me walk around. My…whatever that’s called, bridge, looks different. A little bit more utilitarian, less fabric. Chekov says, there’s a sun. There’s a planet, sir. I see them both. He says, yeah, but what are we doing? Chekov says, see? There’s these lines here, and then there’s a wave, then there’s another wave, like a spectrogram.

 

He says, what are you checking for? Then he goes over to somebody else. He says, can you double-check Chekov’s work for me? I'm gonna sit down. Chekov says, sir, my work doesn't need another thing. But we're gonna go to a beautiful shot of a space station. It ends up…they said, oh, lets call a space station. They got neon gas spectrometers. We get these characters that we could only assume are scientists based on the way they're dressed. She’s having a FaceTime call with Paul Winfield and Chekov, and she’s not happy about it. Then she goes to this guy. They're both blonde. I'm not sure this is the same actor from that Brooke Shields movie with the kids in the lagoon, but I always thought it was this…I never saw that movie. I’ve never seen it my whole life, but I’ve seen the trailers for it. I said, is that the kid from the Blue Lagoon? Now much more of a man, and in this case, a scientist man. She’s also a scientist. I don't know if they're related or she’s a supervisor.

 

It’s tough to say, but they're discussing something about the call, and she’s making a face like…and then he’s kinda like…he doesn't seem comfortable with the call. She seems slightly amused by his reaction, but also miffed. I think…oh, they're Gravitronic C, Gravitronic D; those are a couple of the departments there. They have a discussion about it. He’s like, by the way, I wear a sleeveless shirt. You know, I wear short sleeve; you wear long sleeves. She says, well, I like your short sleeves. Let me tuck on them and head off to work, to FR101. Okay, then we go back to the ship with Winfield and Chekov, or Terrell and Chekov. They're circling the planet. Then we get to energize in; two spacesuits, yellow and a red. Race-car styling, big helmets, some sort of detectors, a lot of mist, maybe even a sand storm. Those two are looking around. But somehow, due to great cinematography and effects, you could see the faces of the two characters and I'm presuming could hear their dialog, so you know it’s Terrell and Chekov.

 

There’s a sun low in the sky behind the sand. They're wandering around. They're looking for something, 'cause…and they're scanning for it. They're scanning for stuff. Then they find a old box. They look at each other and they say, there’s an old box. Is this what we’ve been looking…is this what we’ve been scanning for? It looks like a RV or a couple RVs. Winfield says, Chekov, put your helmet on mine like in the movies before we go in. So, they touch helmets. Then they go in to where…and it’s got…it's breathable oxygen. They take off their helmets. It’s kinda one of those things that’s like, did somebody just leave here? ‘Cause there’s food, there’s a heater, a water distiller or something. They look around, and their suits indoors don't look as good as they do outdoors. They kinda look like they made them at home. There’s checkers or some sort of similar game. There’s a terrarium. Paul Winfield says, is this some sort of terrarium? Huh, I wonder if there’s…what’s in this terrarium, if it’s just plant matter.

 

Chekov says, this is one of the mysteries of the movie. I'm gonna start to look around. There’s books; Moby Dick, Paradise Lost, King Lear, The Inferna, Paradise Regained, two copies of Paradise Lost, one copy of Paradise Gained, King Lear, and then something called Statute Regulating. I wonder if I could even see closer. I think the Bible? I can't quite see, but I think that one is the Holy Bible, and a belt buckle for the SS Botany Bay. Chekov sees the belt buckle. Botany Bay, he says. You could clearly see; it says Botany Bay over and over again. Then he goes, whoa, whoa, like kinda Keanu style, and then he goes…he looks up. He goes, man, you gotta see it. It’s super…we gotta go check this out. Terrell goes, okay. He goes, no, we gotta get out of our…out of the ship. We gotta hit the road. Then they open and they pause, and out in the sandstorm are people dressed up for some sort of event, maybe trick-or-treating?

 

Then we go back to Terrell’s ship, and they're trying to call them, two of the characters that were…the staff members. They say, yeah, I can't even get through. Not working. I shouldn't have sat down with the two most important people on the ship, maybe. Okay, then we're back. We got Terrell and Chekov. We see somebody removing their warm gloves and then their outdoor…'cause I guess…so, it’s cold out there, clearly, 'cause they're getting out their winter gear. It’s a slow reveal. We see their lips. We see Chekov watching, then we see their eyes. Oh no, their whole face. A famous face, especially back then; Ricardo Montalban, who was on a totally different style of show. So, his casting is epic in this case, that he’s so good at this role, and it’s even better now, I think, 'cause he doesn't have…you don't have any history with him. But he’s like…you say, is that gravity or gravitas? But he’s got a stern look on his face. He’s glaring at Chekov. He throws his winter clothes to one of his assistants.

 

There’s a bunch of other people there, also a blonde guy in a headband who kinda looks like he’s from a roller-derby futuristic movie. He seems to be the second in command. Like, that he could start break-dancing or rollerskating dancing at any moment, but in some sort of way that says…but anyway, this…Ricardo Montalban does play Khan, and he talks to Winfield, then he talks to Chekov. He’s giving a stern talking to. Chekov is not breaking eye…like, he’s not blinking, not…oh, there, he just blinked. But for a while he wasn't blinking. Then whatever he says to him…then he blinks a lot, 'cause Khan’s like, what, did you make these spacesuits yourself? These regulation? They're made from cardboard and paper-mache. Chekov says, these are regulation spacesuits. Then Paul Winfield says, listen, you realize we just beamed down here to look into this mystery? Khan kinda says, this mystery? What about this mystery, all my friends? Everybody’s staring.

 

They already had taken off their winter clothes. So, it’s warm in this RV, or extended RV. Paul Winfield says, I'm hot in this spacesuit. Khan says, you're not hot in this spacesuit. He goes, no, I am. The guy listening along, he’s loving that Khan’s really…he goes, you'll be as hot as I want you to be in your spacesuits. I'll give you some space. He’s going on and on and on. Chekov’s just…Chekov is not comfortable with the situation. So, he’s watching Khan, and Khan’s just saying, yeah, me, my friends, you're our guests now. Terrell says, what do you mean, our guests? We're on a work mission. He goes, no, you're…I'm your guest. You and Chekov here. He goes, Chekov; you know Chekov? Are you familiar with Chekov? Because you two showed up here and you didn't even have an invite. Then Chekov says something, and Khan’s like, I have no tolerance for you. He goes, are you being a smart aleck, Mr. Chekov? He’s really not happy about it. In the movie he’s kinda laying out all the really powerful stuff.

 

But when you're watching it on mute without subtitles and trying not to describe what’s happening, it still does seem powerful. He’s saying, you two and then this one, and he’s going back and forth. Winfield’s like, what is going on here? ‘Cause it’s really…on mute it seems self-indulgent, 'cause he’s making a speech. But everybody’s watching like he’s a hero except for Terrell and Chekov, and Chekov goes, you're no hero. He goes, I don't even like you. Khan goes, this guy says he doesn't even like me. Wait a second. You don't like me? Then he says to Paul Winfield, this guy doesn't like me? Wait a second. Huh, this is delightful. You just reminded me of something. Maybe it’s song. Then…now, this is where it’s interesting. So, Chekov and Winfield have these handles on the fronts of their suit, I think so you can hang them up later. But Khan also has super strength. So, he says, look, I can even hold up your suit. Let’s see if it made of cardboard.

 

It turns out it’s not, and so, he’s able to lift up Chekov and the suit. He puts him down. Then he says, let me take my jacket off, 'cause I'm in great shape. Have you seen my terrarium? Winfield says, actually, I have. He goes, this is a grape terrarium. They say, a grape terrarium? Oh, yeah, yeah, grapes. It’s full of…these are grape plants. He goes, these are grape friends. Paul Winfield’s like, what is this? He starts sweating. He goes, I'm gonna take some grapes outta here. They say, grapes? He goes, these are the grapes of Khan, and they…wait, wait. So, he starts filling a jar with grapes that aren't…they said, grapes grow on vines, not in a terrarium with some sort of grape-producing beings. But he fills a bowl with these grapes. They do look delectable. But both of them are like, we're not eating any grapes. Khan just says, grapes? You're eating grapes? Did I say you're gonna eat grapes? Then he touches his ear. He says, I didn't say anything about eating grapes.

 

They say, you're not gonna put any grapes in our ear, by the way. He goes, oh no, no, no. I want you to listen. Then this is called Khan’s Whisper, unofficially, Khan’s Whisper. He fills his mouth with grapes, which looks ridiculous. So, both Terrell and…what do you call it? Chekov are like, what are you doing? You're gonna spit grapes at us? But alls he does is he whispers in their ears, kinda like…it's just weird having someone with…his cheeks are full of grapes. Then he starts whispering in their ears. Then he fills their…now, this is the part that wasn't so great; a little bit of a gagster. After he whispers in their ear, which seems to have some sort of effect on them, he puts a grape helmet…their helmets back on with the grapes and then smushes their heads with grape juice, which wasn't so nice. Nobody wants…it's very sticky and stuff. Then he sits down and he’s like, did you hear my whisper? Now that you're covered in grape juice, I hope you heard me.

 

I hope you heard what I was whispering, and I hope you listen to the lesson I’ve given you. Okay, then we have a scene with Kirk on a shuttle, reading. At first he looked like he was in the loo, but no, he’s in a shuttle, a shuttle that looks like…or he’s in the…does his shuttle have a loo? Huh. Well, now we see another shuttle. Maybe he was in the loo. We see a space dock. The Enterprise is space-docked. Oh no; he’s standing up with his book under his arm. He says, there she is. You see people working on the ship. You could see why there’s comedy movies based on this. Old McCoy stands up behind him. The ship does look great. Oh boy, are all the upgrades done? That ship looks great. The rest of the crew is smiling. Then we see the shuttle comes in for a dock. It has to reverse. I'm assuming it has a reverse camera. Shuttle 5 coming in, backing up. We got a seal. They blow the navy whistle. Saavik and Spock are side-by-side, ready for inspection, I'm assuming. Still got that book, eh? And your fist is clutched.

 

I wonder if that was something going on with Kirk. He hands his book over; says, let me take a look at this amazing group of people. Oh, there’s his buddy, Scotty. Oh, I get McCoy and Scotty mixed up. Or, no, is that McCoy or Scotty? Scotty’s different than McCoy. McCoy’s the care person. Scotty’s in charge. Oh, we get a little…we meet a new character who we’ll see again later. They're…all…this is engineering. They all have their spacesuits on. They have rings. Spock seems pleased. He says, go to board or whatever. Everybody walks off. Not a lot of eye contact with Spock. Even Scotty avoids it. Then they talk in Vulcan. They're talking. So, there’s…Saavik and Spock talking about…who’s that? What’s his name? Captain Kirk, right? We get a above shot of Kirk exploring more of the ship or checking more of the ship from the second floor. Interesting shot. Oh, he checks…he does a little white tissue treatment. Scotty’s pretty happy. Wow, we do get a lot of previews here.

 

We see another sealed-off chamber. He goes, this thing’s spick and span. I really love it. Then he goes on a elevator, and McCoy says something about something. He goes, later, bro. Then we get a sequence of lights coming on. I'm assuming these are practical effects, and they look great…on a model or something. It really looks great. Then we're on the bridge, and who’s in the captain’s chair but Spock. McCoy and Kirk come onto the bridge. Kirk’s really nostalgic? Savoring it? Confused? Spock just signs something off. He’s sitting in the commander’s chair, captain’s chair. Now he turns. He takes some time. Says, boss, what’s up? How’s it going? Saavik says, huh, interesting. Did you call on me? Maybe he says, should I let the cap…should I let the admiral sit in the captain’s chair? I think I will. Why don't you take a seat here? There’s a new chair. We kept everything including any gasses you put off, Kirk, in this chair. This is a upgraded chair. We didn't replace anything.

 

Oh no, Saavik goes…he says, Saavik, why don't you…? I think she’s gonna pull out of the space dock. I mean, I'd say, okay, I guess I resign if I have to do it in front of Admiral Kirk. Kirk’s like, what are you doing, Spock? This is my ship. They head out of the space dock. Oh, we see nice panelling, not…like the panelling on the hull of the ship is not perfectly one color. So, we see a patchwork of colors. It really does add to the realism and the look. It’s a slow exit. Somebody in a spacesuit is waving. You can't tell if they're saying, whoa, slow it down, no wake, no wake. NCC-1701 heading out in space, presumably for just a short spin. But yeah, it continues to head out into space. We see more shots of the ship looking amazing, a shot of giant windows. I don't know if that’s Ten Forward or that’s probably on the next Enterprise or the Enterprise after that, maybe their equivalent. Saavik says, see? I didn't bump anything. So, tone it down, Kirk. We got walking around the bridge, a little bit of talking.

 

Sulu thinks something’s funny. I don't know what 'cause I don't have any way of knowing. Kirk is pleased, too. Of course, then McCoy’s not. Then they head out, then they’re gonna…yeah, let’s hit some warp or let’s go fast. Next we see the space station. We’ve seen it before. It has four landing platforms. We see the old Blue Lagoon looking good. Sleeves are rolled up. Great arms on this Blue Lagoon. He turns something off. He says, hey, let’s talk, you and I. Then someone on the second floor says, we got a call coming in. Okay, put it through to my line, but don't listen in. Who is it but Chekov, and he’s clearly under the influence of Khan’s Whisper, kinda like…Khan’s Whisper. Not A Careless Whisper, just in case you're thinking of Wham. Not a careless whisper. His was an intentional whisper. So, he’s not whispering something to the scientist and she’s like, I don't like whatever you're whispering. He even smiles, which gives some people a chuckle. Then they…but she’s like, no.

 

He’s laying out some stuff. I do remember the scene pretty clearly, so…oh, there’s a guy…you could wear a sleeveless shirt. There’s really a well-proportioned bicep guy in the background. Sleeveless; that’d be comfortable for me. I'm glad I could…I could get behind being a scientist on there. You choose your sleeves. Okay, then Blue Lagoon and the lead scientist are like, this is not…they don't like anything. That’s…Chekov is saying now. Glaring at him…sorry, I'm just wondering, you know? I'm trying to make this…and then we see that Khan’s running the show, and he’s telling Chekov what to whisper. They cut off the thing. Khan wears one glove and something that looks like…from the movie Avengers, the necklace from the movie Avengers. It’s actually a Starfleet symbol. We go back to the Enterprise. It’s trucking through space. We're at Turbo Lift B, and Saavik gets on after some sort of…seemingly a martial arts class. Her hair is down. She catch…she says, excuse me, my hair is down.

 

Kirk says, huh, interesting; your hair is down. She says, yeah, this is Starfleet regulations. She hits a button. He says, okay, tell me, what kind of martial arts do you practice? She says, this is Khan’s…none of your business. I don't need to inform you about my martial arts, or…I don't even call them martial arts. He laughs. He says, was that a double entendre? She goes, absolutely not. So, pull it together. He says, yeah, I'm…that’s what I'm trying…that’s what I'm here to do, actually. My life’s…and then who’s waiting outside the door but McCoy who wants…he says, I’ve been waiting forever for this turbo lift, man. What are you doing, talking about martial arts? Kirk says, I totally…oh, I gotta take a call. Excuse me. He takes a call. Interesting, interesting. McCoy? Interesting, huh? Did you call…? Okay, tell me again. McCoy has something quippy to say. Kirk says, don't get quippy with me when I'm not in a mood for you being…this is…we're friends after hours. He gets off on D.

 

He gets a call from the same scientist who is…she doesn't have a great signal. So, she’s trying to tell Kirk something critical and important and confirm something with him, clearly. He’s like, I'm sorry, you're…there’s some sort of flux…we got a flux issue or something. Could you say that again? She says, stop asking me to say it again. I know you just don't want to understand me. Then the signal goes out. He looks at the board. He says, huh, interesting; signal’s out. Not exactly sure what to do. Then we see the ship again. Oh, we see the scientists. They're having a meeting. They got a nice microscope, they got a bunch of tools, but they're having a big meeting. Let’s debate this. She says, my neck is killing me from this discussion. We do see a variety of sleeve types and sizes. We could probably count six there. That would be twelve sleeves. Then we see Spock in some sort of meditative cloak and state. He’s meditating in a very clerical-like outfit. I think he does have a full turtleneck on that one.

 

He says, Jim, what’s up? You interrupted my meditation. Kirk says, what style of meditation do you prefer? Because…he goes, I love this mirror. He’s got an infinity mirror. He says, Jim, I'm not looking in the mirror right now. I was meditating. He says, check me out in this mirror. It’s like I'm in…I don't know. He goes, Jim, what do you need? He says, oh, this scientist called from a space station. She wasn’t happy with me, but I don't understand why. Also, I got confused trying to make small talk with Saavik about martial arts. That didn't go well. He says, Jim, I'm not your mother’s keeper. He laughs at that 'cause he knows that means that really Spock is. He goes, I'm not your father’s keeper, either, or your mother or your father, Jim, or your brother or your friend. I'm your logical asset. He goes, logical asset…heh, heh, heh, logical asset. He says, Jim, I'm not your principal, either, but I could be. Now, let me explain to you what a logical asset actually, is, Jim.

 

In this situation with the scientist, logically we're having a miscommunication issue. We gotta figure it out. I'm gonna stand up and I'm gonna talk closer to you so you understand. This is not a part of play-acting or joking. I'm trying to talk to you captain to admiral. It’s a uncomfortable situation, so maybe you should just be captain of the ship. You're the admiral. Kirk says, perfect. Glad I could take over. Then he heads right to the bridge. Says, effective immediately, I think, I'm taking over the ship. I’ve got a beautiful voice. They say, what about…does this mean Spock’s not gonna be…? No…he goes, we now have a logical asset named Spock, and I'll be taking over. Saavik, you're in the chair. She goes, I'm buckled in the chair. Sulu says, she’s buckled in the chair. There’s a new guy, and then there’s another new guy, and they're friends with Saavik. Sulu says, I need to hear…I can't just hear about a logical asset. I need clearance from…but we’ll go to warp anyway to check this base out.

 

1884 or whatever; that’s Paul Winfield’s ship, now run by Khan. Sitting in the commander’s chair…Paul Winfield stands at attention. So, when he gets a whisper, it’s different than when…but Khan and his first in command, roller derby, roller-disco musical guy, he’s even got a tattered, silken, sateen warm-up suit, and a beautiful headband and a padded vest. But again, we see the…I think we're seeing the different ways commanders and first commanders interact. We see that Khan…oh, Khan’s actually wearing half a uniform now. Huh, I didn't…I wonder if he was wearing that before. He’s not happy about it. You kinda see he’s a little bit indulgent in his own self-righteous anger, I think. We go back to the Enterprise. They're navigating. Let’s press some buttons. Let’s see if we can get this…get the communicate…it's not working. It’s not working. The communication is not working. Okay, we go back. Spock says, I have to report you that the communication isn't working, admiral, captain.

 

He goes, okay, captain, first officer. He goes, why did you pick teal as a chair color? Spock says, this is not teal. It’s turquoise…bluebird shell. It’s a form of turquoise, kinda like a off-white turquoise with sea-green sea foam. He goes, yeah, but what if you…? Oh, it’s stain-proof and spill-proof. He goes, we gotta have a meeting. I can't be serious in these chairs. Oh, they have to get a secret message…the only people that are authorized are Kirk, who gets his retinal scan. Kirk…optical disk. James T. Kirk, Spock can watch, and McCoy can watch. 71330, Project Genesis. It’s a slideshow. We meet the scientist. She’s the head of Project Genesis. Oh, she was the one on the call. She’s explaining what Project Genesis is. She says, hey, we’d love…yeah, we're looking for…this is our second round of funding for Project Genesis. It’s a fractal-based art system, and it’s got fireworks and a laser light show that looks like neon, and then there’s a helix ride. There’s also…it's run by a genesis device.

 

It’s a theme park in a device…a theme park in a device. You could see we're gonna send it down to this moon. Now, when it goes in the moon, it will have a impact, and the planet will change from a cratered, moon-like planet…probably not a lot of things existing on there. It’ll sparkle and then it’ll terra…it's terraforming, basically, if you've…it's instant terraform, and it’ll become a place totally…what do they call it? Thematic…atmos…like themed lands, hotels, water feature, atmosphere, everything. A theme…a whole planetoid…the planetoid; not a whole planet that’ll be a theme park for recreation. Spock says, why does anyone recreate, anyway? McCoy’s like, we gotta be…I gotta make some serious stuff here. Kirk says, opinions. Spock says, I think that was an opinion. It was stated as a question. McCoy says, you know, I got grand kids. I gotta pay for tickets for these kind of things. The more theme parks…you think the price is gonna go down.

 

He goes…Spock goes, I don't understand your question. Like, we would get a discount through Starfleet. He goes, I'm not talking about me. I'm talking about people like me; grandfathers, grandmothers, parents, and paying out the nose for these theme-park planets even when it’s not a whole planet. He goes, it’s a plan…Spock says, it’s a planetoid. Themed lands. It’s worth every penny. It was just terraformed instantly. McCoy is beside himself. You get this guy? Planetoid. He wants to correct my…and he goes, what, are you defending the theme-park barons? Spock says, they don't need my defence. I'm merely commenting on your commenting. Kirk goes, ugh, theme-park planet. We're not here to judge anything. We're here to figure out what’s going on. Why was the scientist so displeased with me? Then they say, we got a ship on board…we see a ship, sir. See a ship? Okay. That’s another…it's the Reliant, the USS Reliant, NCC-1864.

 

Terrell’s the captain, but…they say, unofficial name of the ship now; Grapes of Khan. He said, wait a second, what? Saavik says, we can't get a hold of them. That dialog, I think, was just on board Khan’s ship. They say, did you try all the channels to get ahold of them? Yeah, obviously. Did you un-mute the microphone? Yes, I did. Okay, well, it’s just sitting there. What’s going on? Oh, a little game. Khan does this thing. He’s like, I love playing games. He goes, prepare the grape jelly launchers. We're gonna cover the ship in grape jelly. [Inaudible]…it’s not just grapes; it’s sticky, sugary, and very low grape…barely any grape juice, even, in grape jelly, and I cannot wait. They face each other, but no one on the Enterprise knows what’s going on. So, Kirk’s like, what is going on here? Terrell, you're always reliable. Please come back. We're trying to get ahold of you. I assure you we're un-muted. I'll hit un-mute again. Then Kirk says, I don't…something’s off. My throat’s tickling. Be prepared for anything.

 

Then Spock says, anything? He goes, anything that, you know…and then they go back to Khan’s ship. Grape jelly loaded. We're gonna put up our shields in case they try marmalade or something. Okay, aim the grape jelly at the bridge. Khan says, grape jelly, but they accidentally shoot it into…they cover the…Engineering in grape jelly. It actually is made to go into the ship, and it covers the engineers with grape jelly. Also, it’s a perfect shot, so the grape jelly also shuts down all the engines, closes some giant door, causes…I mean, there’s tons of grape jelly on the ship, so much that people are swimming in jelly. They're like, trying…they say, good thing we got these suits on. Come on, everybody, we gotta get outta here in case we have to have our uniforms inspected or something. Also, it causes the ship to be destabilized. So, Kirk’s like, Scotty, what’s going on down there? Oh, we're all covered in grape jelly, sir. It’s the grapes of Khan. Kirk says, there’s no grapes, really, in grape jelly. Grape jam, maybe?

 

Grape preserves? Spock says, I’ve never heard of grape preserves, sir. Preserved grapes…we got grapes all over five points on the ship. The ship’s not even operable because it’s messed things up. We're not even aerodynamic anymore. Stuff’s sticking to us. Then they send one more grape jelly right at the bridge. It gets through to the bridge, splatters a decent amount of grape jelly on the bridge. Everybody’s running around. Okay, is anybody…? Are we sure? Anybody have a pectin…? Is anybody sensitive to pectin or grape jelly or sugar? Get off the bridge. Go take a shower. Kirk’s like, what am I…what are we gonna do here? I gotta come up with some kind of plan. This is a time when Spock…he says, sir, all communications have been jammed. He says, did you just make a pun at the most inopportune time? He goes, sir, I did not make a pun. The communications are jammed by jelly, not jam. We have determined this is jelly.

 

It does have…but there is some…they didn't just send over jelly; they did send over preserves. Who? Then Khan comes on the screen, and Kirk cannot believe his eyes. What? What? Hey, remember me? Yeah. Remember my love of grapes? Remember the thing I do with my grapes? I remember you, James T. Kirk. I remember you in my heart. He goes, what are you doing? Kirk says, why are you covering us in jelly? I covered you in my own…it's not jelly, actually. It’s jelly jam and preserves, the perfect thing for messing up starships and getting caught in your suit, getting caught…you're gonna have…are these grape seeds? No, they're…I found the most annoying seeds I could find. Then Kirk tastes it. He says, this is delicious. I don't understand it. He goes, let me…want me to tell you the recipe? Oh boy, you won't believe it. The secret ingredient is this. Then — he’s a prankster — he spits on the ground. That was after Kirk had tasted it. So, Kirk says, I can't believe it.

 

He goes, it is delicious, though, isn't it? Your spit? I guess technically it is delicious when it’s mixed with whatever stuff you mixed it with. I'm sure it’s a low…Khan goes, you'll never know. The…whatever, the ratios. Kirk turns around to his…he says, everybody that doesn't like spit, get off, too. Then he says, let me whisper to you, Spock. We gotta come up with a secret plan. Saavik, you got that thing muted? Yep. Okay. What are we gonna do? ‘Cause we can't fly, and Khan wants something from us, obviously. He’s telling us he could go full jelly if he wanted to. Spock…or Kirk says, hey, listen, I gotta…there must be an ultimatum. He goes, oh, no, no, no. No ultimatums. Then Kirk says, I need my reading glasses, actually, to look something up on the screen. I don't want to…I don't want anybody to see my reading glasses, though. Spock and Saavik are like, okay, we're gonna do a little…he goes, yeah, I'm gonna press all these buttons. What are we gonna do? Well, interesting.

 

Spock, tell me the pole…do you know anything about reversing the polarity of all of those ingredients? Saavik and Spock are like, huh, actually, yeah; the electrostatic on the hull of the ship. Spock says, yeah, it could be done, captain. He goes, okay, just play it cool. Then he goes back to Khan. He goes, you've graped us, Khan. Like a grape ape, you've got us. We really are at your mercy. You know I have reading glasses now, so, I am humbled. Just give me one more second. Turns around…are you almost done? Then…make sure when I turn around, you mute me, Saavik. She goes, I realize that, captain. They go, okay, let’s put in the code. 16309. That’s the wavelength. Then they…all of a sudden, Khan’s ship is…captain, Captain Khan, the grape stuff, it’s coming off their ship. It’s liquefied in a strange way, and they're spraying it back on us. All of a sudden is…somehow, I guess with the electrostatic and some sort of flow thing the Vulcans are good at, math, they send all the grape in a concentrated form.

 

They get it all over the other ship. They shut that ship down. Covered in my own…even the crew is like…they know the ratios, so they say, this is…we're covered in grape stuff. Kirk is like, that’s how you work as a team to reverse a grapey situation. That was grape, everybody. Grape work. That was so grapey. Then Scotty shows up with one of his…the kid we had met earlier. He’s covered in grape juice head to toe, and it’s already started to dry, and he’s very sticky. There’s paperwork stuck to him. He says, look at this, captain. Goes, we don't even have any bread or toast to put this to any use. Look at…the guy’s just like, I'm covered in grapes. Oh man. I was a rookie. This is worse. It’s so embarrassing…and it’s stuck in his hair, and…seeds. So, everybody turns and they say, holy cow, unacceptable. The reason it’s the most unacceptable, kind of, is that…right where we’ll stop.

 

We get a close-up on Spock, who closes his eyes and says…you know, everybody remembers that moment, kinda like…that was what we did losing your swimsuit, where you spill something on yourself at an inopportune time. In this case, this was this rookie on the ship. He’s covered in grape juice. I think he was…he happened to be off duty, so he was not clothed at the time. But now he’s covered in grape juice and paperwork. So, he was in the crew quarters when it filled up with this jelly jam preserve mixture. So, just extra embarrassing for him. Nobody else was covered in it. Nobody else then fell into…also, it was like paperwork that had just been completed in triplicate, carbon copies. I don't know if you know what those are, but…so, he kinda looks like he’s a grapey bird. So, the other thing is people are also giggling and they're feeling…'cause Scotty is very parental and he’s very over the top, dramatic, we’d say. So, then people start to find it hilarious, which makes it worse, because it is hilarious, and it’s relatable.

 

We’ve all been embarrassed, but also being…'cause he was carrying him like a baby and he was saying it in like…he’s got a Scottish accent. My little baby bird. Then even Kirk says my grape…little grape…grapey bird. So, that’ll be probably that guy’s nickname for now. But then what they do is they say, hey, let’s put him in a warm bath. Take him down to my quarters, Kirk says. Put him in a warm bath. He goes, don't worry. He goes, we’re gonna need a ultrasonic cleaner or something. Don't drain the water because it’ll clog the drain. So, he sends…he goes, by the way, Spock, Saavik, go with Scotty because he can't…he goes, everybody else, let’s take a break. Warm baths for everybody. If you're clean, you're grape-free, get in bed, take a nap, and we’ll get back to work soon dealing with the grapes of Khan. Goodnight, everybody.

 

[End of recording]

Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes

Sleepin’ with Trek

 

Mister Rogers

https://www.archives.gov/news/articles/celebrating-mr-rogers-at-the-national-archives

https://www.heinzhistorycenter.org/blog/western-pennsylvania-history-wont-you-be-my-neighbor-mister-rogers/

https://www.history.com/articles/urban-legends-mr-rogers

 

Golden Age of DVD Commentary

https://www.hollywoodinsider.com/dvd-commentary-history/

https://www.avclub.com/read-this-the-declining-art-of-the-dvd-commentary-trac-1798258227

https://www.andsoitbeginsfilms.com/2018/09/an-exhaustive-and-unofficial-guide-to.html

 

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

https://www.theguardian.com/film/filmblog/2011/dec/09/favourite-film-star-trek-wrath-khan

https://joesiegler.blog/2020/08/star-trek-ii-the-wrath-of-khan/

https://www.eruditorumpress.com/blog/khan-nothing-more-star-trek-ii-the-wrath-of-khan

 

Grape Jelly

https://www.backthenhistory.com/articles/the-history-of-welchs-grape-jelly

https://www.lunagrown.com/the-history-of-jam-jelly/?srsltid=AfmBOop_pU0cyJVwW3w19qUFfGaGaLJqkwm55Bk5XLH2NhDHzlkCx6hM

https://blog.thenibble.com/2017/04/03/food-101-the-history-of-jam-jelly-preserves/

 

DOWN TO BUSINESS

I boringly but boldly go where few podcasters meander to

Covering a famous Star Trek movie

Tangentially related to one of my favorite singers

Okay, I’ll give some hints

#1: Grapes of ________

#2: An actor named James with a son named Scott – their last name

#3: Sounds like a movie that Nicolas Cage was in, I think

Just try it out and see how it goes

Share the show if you like it

 

PLUGS

Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

 

SPONSORS

Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Coyuchi

 

INTRO

Maybe there’s a change of some kind

Or you followed all the rules but it still doesn’t work

I followed all the protocols and the rules!

Even if I don’t color within the lines, I do still need the lines

Normally I’ll come up with the title first

Is this a sign of growth?!

Am I able to see a plus sign in both sides?

Internal Personal Growth Milestones

A safe place within other worlds

This may or may not be the right place for a distraction

If I don’t get it, someone else does

And they’re welcoming you and rooting for you

Scooter: Pleasant Enough

Doing a victory lap for being pleasant enough

I celebrate being not half bad

No gongs or bells or tolls here

Non-Traditionally Soothing Counting Down

More Gooey than Guru

sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou

I’m not totally chill like Mister Rogers, believe me

If you’re flourishing, our world is a better place

Listening to a party down the street

There is some thumping bass going on

You could listen to the show

No pressure to fall asleep

I’m just here to hang

Your borefriend on call

Explaining the show structure

Structure and variety

Then we’ll be covering one of the best Star Trek movies

I’m really glad you’re here

 

STORY

The Grapes of Khan (Star Trek 2)

I can’t remember what I mentioned in the intro

Even on its own, this is just a great motion picture

I’d love to hear your thoughts

I haven’t watched the whole thing yet

And I haven’t seen the whole thing in my Post-Cups Era

I’m going to go through the movie on mute with no closed captions

This came out in 1982

I remember I saw this as a kid at a theatre for my birthday

Okay, so here we go

The credits take a trip through space

The 23rd century

How do centuries work?

First person on screen: Spock

Then Uhura, McCoy, Sulu, and more

Cheers to Lieutenant Saavik

Saavik is a Vulcan

Kobayashi Maru – another ship

Kohero Vance runs the other ship

They don’t know what to do about this ship

They have to do some Star Fox moves

Three Klingon birds show up on screen

Those are real birds, pointing laser pointers!

Then some fireworks happen

They sleep, lie down, and run away

A legendary entrance

A profile we know – James T. Kirk

Oh, this is acting!

This was some kind of simulation

Kirk wants to talk to Saavik

Vulcans don’t have favorite people

They’re not on a starship, it was a simulation

Giant Astrolabe

Every movie, they upgrade the uniforms

An upgraded mock turtleneck

Holy 1970s!

Kirk chills in his pad

It might be the San Francisco Bay

A well-decorated, not huge apartment

Is he in loungewear?

McCoy comes over with a gift

McCoy looks like he’s gonna work the Jungle Cruise

He gifts him reading glasses

Is McCoy wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants?

Sitting on a curved chair by a curved fireplace

Debating who gets the comfortable chair

Cut to a spaceship in space

Headed towards a dusty planet

And who do we see but the great Paul Winfield

He’s playing Tyrell

Chekhov is his 2nd in command

Scanning with spectrometers

Some scientists are on the call screen

I’m not sure if this actor is from Blue Lagoon

Neither of the scientists are comfortable with this call

Are they together?

Gravitronics C and D

Cut back to Tyrell and Chekhov

They get energized in

A lot of mist, maybe a sandstorm

Somehow, you can still the characters’ faces

A sun lies low in the sky

They’re scanning for something

They find an old box

They go inside

Did someone leave here? There’s food and water but no people

A terrarium?!

This is one of the mysteries of the movie

Some real classics on the bookshelf

A belt buckle for the SS Botany Bay

Chekhov says, “Whoa,” Keanu-style

People are dressed up in the sandstorm

The ship is trying to contact Tyrell and Chekhov, unsuccessfully

Someone is removing their gloves

A famous face – Ricardo Montalban

This is truly epic casting

Is that gravity or gravitas?

HIs 2nd in command looks like he’s from a future roller derby movie

Montalban plays Khan

He’s giving a stern talking to Tyrell and Chekhov

For a while, Chekhov didn’t blink

Khan mocks their spacesuits

Multiple mysteries

It’s warm in this Extended RV

Khan is very commanding

Chekhov is not comfortable with this situation

Now they are Khan’s guests

Khan makes a self-indulgent speech

Chekhov and Tyrell don’t think Khan is a hero

Chekhov and Tyrell have handles on their suit

Khan has superstrength so he lifts them up

Khan shows off his great terrarium

The Grapes of Khan

He’s filling a jar with grapes from his terrarium

Grape-Producing Beings

Khan plays mind games about eating these grapes

Khan’s Whisper

He fills his mouth with grapes

Then he whispers in their ears

Whispering with cheeks full of grapes

This has some sort of effect on them

Then he puts their helmets on and smushes their heads with grape juice

He hopes they heard what he was whispering

Then we cut to Kirk on a shuttle reading

Is he on the loo?

Does this shuttle have a loo?

There’s the Enterprise

Upgrades are almost complete

I assume this shuttle has reverse cameras

Saavik and Spock are side by side

I mix up McCoy and Scotty

Oh we meet a new character

Spock seems pleased

Inspection is over

Saavik and Spock talk in Vulcan

Kirk inspects the ship

He does a little white tissue treatment

This ship is spick and span

A sequence of lights come on

These practical effects and model look great

Spock sits in the captain’s chair

This chair hasn’t been upgraded

Saavik is gonna pull out of the space dock

I’d resign if I had to back out in front of Kirk

A patchwork of colors on the paneling

Cut back to Blue Lagoon on his own ship

They get a call coming in

Chekhov (under Khan’s influence) is calling him

Khan’s whisper is not careless

A well-proportioned biceps guy is in the background in a sleeveless (!!) uniform

Khan wears one glove and a necklace from Avengers

Saavik gets on Turbo Lift B after a martial arts class

Saavik doesn’t want to talk to Kirk about her workout

McCoy calls Kirk

Don’t get quippy with me, McCoy

Kirk gets a call from the same scientist

She doesn’t have a great signal and keeps cutting out

The scientists are having a meeting

At least 6 varieties of sleeve types

Spock is meditating in a very clerical outfit

Kirk loves Spock’s infinity mirror

Kirk consults with Spock about the mysterious call from the scientist

Your Logical Asset

Talking Captain to Admiral

Spock gives Kirk command as captain

Saavik is already buckled in the chair

They go to check out the base

Winfield is also under the influence

The Roller Derby guy has a beautiful sateen jacket

Khan is now wearing half of a uniform

He’s a little indulgent in his self-righteous anger

Communication is not working

Debating the chair color

Off-white turquoise with stainproof seafoam

The scientist explains Project Genesis

Fractal-Based Arts System

Fireworks and a laser arts show

A theme park in a device

They plan to send it down to the moon

Instant Terraform

Instantly transformed into a planetoid theme park

McCoy wants to know how grandparents are supposed to pay for these theme park planetoids

Spock says it’s purely logical

McCoy and Spock spar

Kirk still doesn’t get it

USS Reliant (Tyrell’s ship) appears

They can’t get ahold of them

Khan says to prepare the grape jelly launchers

Kirk doesn’t realize Khan is in charge

They cover the engineering in grape jelly

The grape jelly shuts down the engines

Swimmin’ in Jelly

It’s the grapes of khan!

Do grape preserves exist?

Our communications have been jammed (hehehe)

Khan finally comes on the screen

Kirk can’t believe it’s Khan!

This jelly is delicious

The secret ingredient is Khan’s spit

Kirk consults secretly with Spock

Can we reverse the polarity of this grape jelly?

Maybe if we flip the electrostatic on the hull of this ship

You’ve graped us, Khan!

The grape stuff is repelled back to Khan’s ship

Concentrated Grape

Covered in grape stuff

And that’s how you work as a team

Grape work, everyone!

Scotty shows up with someone covered in grape juice

There’s no bread or toast to even soak it up

It’s kind of like that feeling of losing your swimsuit

Inopportune Spillage

Covered in grape juice and paperwork

Just extra embarrassing for him

He kind of looks like a grapey bird

Scotty is very parental to this young crewmember

Which is even more embarrassing for this guy

My little baby grapey bird!

Give him an ultrasonic bath

Warm baths for everyone

And let’s take a break and nap

And we’ll return to the grapes of Khan soon

 

SUMMARY:

Episode: 1423

Title: Grapes of Khan Part 1 | Snore Trek

Plugs: Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

Sponsors: Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Coyuchi

Notable Language:

• Internal Personal Growth Milestones
• Pleasant Enough
• Non-Traditionally Soothing Counting Down
• More Gooey than Guru
• Post-Cups Era (PCE)
• Giant Astrolabe
• Mock Turtleneck
• Gravitronics C and D
• Terrarium
• Keanu-style
• Great Terrarium
• Grape-Producing Beings
• Well-Proportioned Biceps Guy
• Logical Asset
• Roller Disco Musical Guy
• Fractal-Based Arts System
• Instant Terraform
• Planetoid Theme Park
• Swimmin’ in Jelly
• Grape Ape
• Concentrated Grape
• My Little Baby Grapey Bird

 

Notable Culture:

• Star Trek

• Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

• The Grapes of Wrath

• • Nicolas Cage
  • sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou
  • Mister Rogers
  • James Caan
  • Scott Caan
  • Chaka Khan
  • Kirstie Alley

• Star Fox

• • Jungle Cruise
  • Fernet
  • Paul Winfield

• Blue Lagoon

• • Brooke Shields

• Paradise Lost

• Moby-Dick

• Paradise Regained

• • Keanu Reeves

• Inferno

• • Ricardo Montalban
  • “Careless Whisper” – Wham!

• The Avengers

 

Notable Talking Points:

• Maybe there’s a change of some kind
• Or you followed all the rules but it still doesn’t work
• I followed all the protocols and the rules!
• Even if I don’t color within the lines, I do still need the lines
• Normally I’ll come up with the title first
• Is this a sign of growth?!
• Am I able to see a plus sign in both sides?
• Internal Personal Growth Milestones
• A safe place within other worlds
• This may or may not be the right place for a distraction
• If I don’t get it, someone else does
• And they’re welcoming you and rooting for you
• Scooter: Pleasant Enough
• Doing a victory lap for being pleasant enough
• I celebrate being not half bad
• No gongs or bells or tolls here
• Non-Traditionally Soothing Counting Down
• More Gooey than Guru
• sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou
• I’m not totally chill like Mister Rogers, believe me
• If you’re flourishing, our world is a better place
• Listening to a party down the street
• There is some thumping bass going on
• You could listen to the show
• No pressure to fall asleep
• I’m just here to hang
• Your borefriend on call
• Explaining the show structure
• Structure and variety
• Then we’ll be covering one of the best Star Trek movies
• I’m really glad you’re here
• The Grapes of Khan (Star Trek 2)
• I can’t remember what I mentioned in the intro
• Even on its own, this is just a great motion picture
• I’d love to hear your thoughts
• I haven’t watched the whole thing yet
• And I haven’t seen the whole thing in my Post-Cups Era
• I’m going to go through the movie on mute with no closed captions
• This came out in 1982
• I remember I saw this as a kid at a theatre for my birthday
• Okay, so here we go
• The credits take a trip through space
• The 23rd century
• How do centuries work?
• First person on screen: Spock
• Then Uhura, McCoy, Sulu, and more
• Cheers to Lieutenant Saavik
• Saavik is a Vulcan
• Kobayashi Maru – another ship
• Kohero Vance runs the other ship
• They don’t know what to do about this ship
• They have to do some Star Fox moves
• Three Klingon birds show up on screen
• Those are real birds, pointing laser pointers!
• Then some fireworks happen
• They sleep, lie down, and run away
• A legendary entrance
• A profile we know – James T. Kirk
• Oh, this is acting!
• This was some kind of simulation
• Kirk wants to talk to Saavik
• Vulcans don’t have favorite people
• They’re not on a starship, it was a simulation
• Giant Astrolabe
• Every movie, they upgrade the uniforms
• An upgraded mock turtleneck
• Holy 1970s!
• Kirk chills in his pad
• It might be the San Francisco Bay
• A well-decorated, not huge apartment
• Is he in loungewear?
• McCoy comes over with a gift
• McCoy looks like he’s gonna work the Jungle Cruise
• He gifts him reading glasses
• Is McCoy wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants?
• Sitting on a curved chair by a curved fireplace
• Debating who gets the comfortable chair
• Cut to a spaceship in space
• Headed towards a dusty planet
• And who do we see but the great Paul Winfield
• He’s playing Tyrell
• Chekhov is his 2nd in command
• Scanning with spectrometers
• Some scientists are on the call screen
• I’m not sure if this actor is from Blue Lagoon
• Neither of the scientists are comfortable with this call
• Are they together?
• Gravitronics C and D
• Cut back to Tyrell and Chekhov
• They get energized in
• A lot of mist, maybe a sandstorm
• Somehow, you can still the characters’ faces
• A sun lies low in the sky
• They’re scanning for something
• They find an old box
• They go inside
• Did someone leave here? There’s food and water but no people
• A terrarium?!
• This is one of the mysteries of the movie
• Some real classics on the bookshelf
• A belt buckle for the SS Botany Bay
• Chekhov says, “Whoa,” Keanu-style
• People are dressed up in the sandstorm
• The ship is trying to contact Tyrell and Chekhov, unsuccessfully
• Someone is removing their gloves
• A famous face – Ricardo Montalban
• This is truly epic casting
• Is that gravity or gravitas?
• HIs 2nd in command looks like he’s from a future roller derby movie
• Montalban plays Khan
• He’s giving a stern talking to Tyrell and Chekhov
• For a while, Chekhov didn’t blink
• Khan mocks their spacesuits
• Multiple mysteries
• It’s warm in this Extended RV
• Khan is very commanding
• Chekhov is not comfortable with this situation
• Now they are Khan’s guests
• Khan makes a self-indulgent speech
• Chekhov and Tyrell don’t think Khan is a hero
• Chekhov and Tyrell have handles on their suit
• Khan has superstrength so he lifts them up
• Khan shows off his great terrarium
• The Grapes of Khan
• He’s filling a jar with grapes from his terrarium
• Grape-Producing Beings
• Khan plays mind games about eating these grapes
• Khan’s Whisper
• He fills his mouth with grapes
• Then he whispers in their ears
• Whispering with cheeks full of grapes
• This has some sort of effect on them
• Then he puts their helmets on and smushes their heads with grape juice
• He hopes they heard what he was whispering
• Then we cut to Kirk on a shuttle reading
• Is he on the loo?
• Does this shuttle have a loo?
• There’s the Enterprise
• Upgrades are almost complete
• I assume this shuttle has reverse cameras
• Saavik and Spock are side by side
• I mix up McCoy and Scotty
• Oh we meet a new character
• Spock seems pleased
• Inspection is over
• Saavik and Spock talk in Vulcan
• Kirk inspects the ship
• He does a little white tissue treatment
• This ship is spick and span
• A sequence of lights come on
• These practical effects and model look great
• Spock sits in the captain’s chair
• This chair hasn’t been upgraded
• Saavik is gonna pull out of the space dock
• I’d resign if I had to back out in front of Kirk
• A patchwork of colors on the paneling
• Cut back to Blue Lagoon on his own ship
• They get a call coming in
• Chekhov (under Khan’s influence) is calling him
• Khan’s whisper is not careless
• A well-proportioned biceps guy is in the background in a sleeveless (!!) uniform
• Khan wears one glove and a necklace from Avengers
• Saavik gets on Turbo Lift B after a martial arts class
• Saavik doesn’t want to talk to Kirk about her workout
• McCoy calls Kirk
• Don’t get quippy with me, McCoy
• Kirk gets a call from the same scientist
• She doesn’t have a great signal and keeps cutting out
• The scientists are having a meeting
• At least 6 varieties of sleeve types
• Spock is meditating in a very clerical outfit
• Kirk loves Spock’s infinity mirror
• Kirk consults with Spock about the mysterious call from the scientist
• Your Logical Asset
• Talking Captain to Admiral
• Spock gives Kirk command as captain
• Saavik is already buckled in the chair
• They go to check out the base
• Winfield is also under the influence
• The Roller Derby guy has a beautiful sateen jacket
• Khan is now wearing half of a uniform
• He’s a little indulgent in his self-righteous anger
• Communication is not working
• Debating the chair color
• Off-white turquoise with stainproof seafoam
• The scientist explains Project Genesis
• Fractal-Based Arts System
• Fireworks and a laser arts show
• A theme park in a device
• They plan to send it down to the moon
• Instant Terraform
• Instantly transformed into a planetoid theme park
• McCoy wants to know how grandparents are supposed to pay for these theme park planetoids
• Spock says it’s purely logical
• McCoy and Spock spar
• Kirk still doesn’t get it
• USS Reliant (Tyrell’s ship) appears
• They can’t get ahold of them
• Khan says to prepare the grape jelly launchers
• Kirk doesn’t realize Khan is in charge
• They cover the engineering in grape jelly
• The grape jelly shuts down the engines
• Swimmin’ in Jelly
• It’s the grapes of khan!
• Do grape preserves exist?
• Our communications have been jammed (hehehe)
• Khan finally comes on the screen
• Kirk can’t believe it’s Khan!
• This jelly is delicious
• The secret ingredient is Khan’s spit
• Kirk consults secretly with Spock
• Can we reverse the polarity of this grape jelly?
• Maybe if we flip the electrostatic on the hull of this ship
• You’ve graped us, Khan!
• The grape stuff is repelled back to Khan’s ship
• Concentrated Grape
• Covered in grape stuff
• And that’s how you work as a team
• Grape work, everyone!
• Scotty shows up with someone covered in grape juice
• There’s no bread or toast to even soak it up
• It’s kind of like that feeling of losing your swimsuit
• Inopportune Spillage
• Covered in grape juice and paperwork
• Just extra embarrassing for him
• He kind of looks like a grapey bird
• Scotty is very parental to this young crewmember
• Which is even more embarrassing for this guy
• My little baby grapey bird!
• Give him an ultrasonic bath
• Warm baths for everyone
• And let’s take a break and nap
• And we’ll return to the grapes of Khan soon