1356 – Rearranging Deck Chairs | Get Besos in the Sky PI 10

Episode 1356 – Rearranging Deck Chairs | Get Besos in the Sky PI 10

 

[START OF RECORDING]

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster who’s here to slow it down, keep you company, and take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep, to be your friend in the deep, dark night and just be here for you, a boring voice. Welcome, by the way. If you're new, welcome to Sleep With Me. This show is very different if you're new, but I’m really glad you're here. This is one of these different things that I really hope helps you out. If you have trouble sleeping because of thoughts, feelings, physical sensations, and you need something mildly distracting to take your mind off whatever’s…falling you asleep, this is…this actually is a sleep aid in the sense that it doesn't fix your sleep; I don't actually put you to sleep.

 

I just keep you company and hang out with you while you fall asleep. But I hang out with you in a way…you say, well, at least you don’t…at least you're not my roommate, because I’m glad I can use a sleep timer with you, or I don't have to clean up after you or anything. So, I don't know, it’s tough to know…also, you never know to look for something like that. You're saying, wait, so you offer a kind of a personal service where you talk in a rambling, nonsensical, meandering way so I could fall asleep? I never even would have thought to look for something like that.

 

I’d say, yeah, but I bet or I would…I think that you may have tried other stuff in that way, whether it’s music or stuff that’s supposed to be sleepy or a show or a TV on in the other room or your imagination or whatever it is to kinda tell you a meandering story, or a roommate that’s just really boring or a friend. You say, hey, let me call…can you call me? We really don’t do this anymore, but you could but somebody on speakerphone and they could tell you about their day, or you say, could you tell me a story that you make up or that you…? Tell me about a story you wrote. I say, well, that’s what I’m gonna do tonight, so…yeah. So, welcome to Sleep With Me. I’m glad you're here, and this is just the very beginning of the show.

 

So, what we got coming up is support so paying for the show is optional, then a long, meandering intro meant to ease you into bedtime, and then our bedtime story. So, I’m glad you're here if you're new. I really appreciate you checking the show out. Regular listeners, man, so good to see you again, snooze you again. I guess so good to snooze you again. So, yeah, what do you say we…? Oh, what do I do next? Oh, so the way we are able to be here for a regular basis…I’m here to be on a regular basis because of the people that support the show on a regular basis, and that’s just how this podcast works. I’m able to help everybody out fall asleep by the people that benefit from the podcast the most or just benefit at all. You say, man, this show makes my life better. Let me opt in, because this show is a part of my life. I want it to be a part of my life and other people’s lives. So, thank you so much, and if you're interested in that, here’s a couple ways you could join in.

 

INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts, like things you're thinking about, thoughts about the past, the present, the future, thoughts that are just there, thoughts that seem so irrational and that just pop right into your head, or at least my head. So, it could be thoughts, it could be feelings, anything emotionally coming up for you or to you.

 

I wish I could say that; don’t come up to me with those emotions, self. But that doesn't necessarily work, right? The direct approach for me at bedtime has never worked with thoughts, feelings, or physical sensations. But then, saying the direct approach doesn't work is also too direct. I don't know…if you listen to the show, you may get that. It may not be clear 'cause it’s not totally clear to me why. But what do I mean? Well, whether it’s thoughts, feelings, physical sensations or something else…you say, well, if you don’t…if I say, no, let’s not have any emotions at bedtime, that doesn't work. But then if you also say, no, no, that also…you say, well…I mean, this is just the things that go through my head. Well, what kind of person would put a limit on their emotions at bedtime?

 

You say, well, those thoughts are gonna bring up some emotions for me. I’m trying not…it’s a lose-lose situation, and that’s why I make this show, because I get it. Whether it’s one of those things or you're going through something right now, you're traveling, you have a different work schedule, you have guests, you're in the middle of something or getting over something, whatever’s keeping you awake, I’m here to try to help with that. One, the main reason I’m here to help is 'cause I know what it’s like for me in the morning, at bedtime, and in the middle of the night when I can't get the sleep I need and I desire, particularly in the middle of it, right, in the deep, dark night, as I call it.

 

So, if it’s like that for you or even if it’s different but some of the underlying feelings are the same, I really feel for you. There’s enough people listening that other people feel for you, too, and there’s people listening somewhere in the world. There’s at least one person listening right now that has been where you are, and they are rooting for you. I hear from listeners, so this is…and they like this part because regular listeners, they say, man, someone out there that’s new to the show has gone through this, too, or they went through that thing that I went through? Man, I hope this show can help them like it helped me. I really feel good about that. If you're new, you could feel good about that, too.

 

Even if this show never helps you, you can know that that goodness is out there in the world. It really is, and I think it’s more and more important for me to kinda bring attention to it, 'cause it’s a subtle thing but it’s a true thing, that you get to root for other people when you listen to this show, and other people are rooting for you. Maybe that’s the wrong way to describe it, but I think that’s the way I’m comfortable describing it, 'cause it’s kind of like a nice thing, but it doesn't involve a whole lot of commitment, or you don’t have to stretch yourself, either. You just have to say, man, good you're here. I know what that feels like, and I hope this show can help you out.

 

The other part of this is that you deserve a bedtime where you could get the rest you need, that you desire, so your life is more manageable tomorrow and more manageable on a regular basis. You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread or feel like you're in the middle of all this rigmarole like I do sometimes, like you're caught in that non…the winless situation. A Sleep With Me sports story, The Winless Situation. Someone remind me of that one day. I don't think that…A Case of A Winless…I don't think that works, either. The Case of the Winless Situation; I guess it works for a title of a sleep podcast. Actually, tonight’s episode kind of is…you could say it’s similar…I mean, maybe all our stories are like that. I mean, really, it is; it is getting a win out of a winless situation or a positive thing.

 

That’s why I make the show. That’s why I’ve been doing it for eleven years, twelve years? I don't even know, and why it’s an honor and why I pour so much into this show, is because I believe in it, because I believe in those two facts. It’s important for us to kinda…even through a podcast, even through this pseudo thing, to relate to one another with kindness and caring in this kind of indirect way, and because you deserve a good night's sleep. So, that’s why I’m here. Now, this show is very different. You probably already figured that out, and it’s not most people’s taste, especially at first. So, the biggest piece of information I’ve ever gotten over the past eleven years is on a regular basis that’s it’s like, it takes a couple tries to get used to this show.

 

Most people get here…you're skeptical, you're doubtful, you're tired, you're frustrated, you probably paid for a bunch of different other sleep products, maybe you tried other sleep audio, and maybe you're fed up, right? Now you're listening to me and you're like, I thought you were gonna put me to sleep. You're just rambling and talking about nothing. I say, yeah, I am, 'cause I’m here to kinda keep you company, but it takes some getting used to to realize this podcast is always going nowhere, always never getting started. What that really means…that the meaning of the show comes from its meaninglessness. Man. It’s true, though.

 

So, that just takes some getting used to, and that’s what people that have been supporting the show for like ten years said; at first I couldn't stand you the first two times I listened, and then the third time I said, oh, I woke up; I didn’t even…oh yeah, now I get it. It is like a TV on in the other room or a sitcom under my pillow. Is that a sitcom under your pillow? No, it’s a phone playing a sitcom under my pillow. Oh, thanks, thanks, thanks. I just got rolled by one of my own brain parts there. So…sorry. I mean, you know what I meant. You didn’t have to point it out literally, even though it was imagined…that was an imaginary exercise that I didn’t even…that’s why I say it’s a winless…whatever I said, a winless adventure? I don't know. So, it just takes some getting used to.

 

This show is friendly, though, so just give it a few tries and see how it goes. You got nothing to lose because if you decide this show is not for you or you've already decided and you're still listening, we have a website set up, sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou, and that has other sleep podcasts and sleepy audio on there you could check out, and hopefully that’ll help you. So, that’s one thing I like to talk about in the intro. The other is…kind of I’ve been talking about; this is a podcast you just barely listen to, kinda like background noise. You could pay attention, but you don’t need to pay attention. I don't know, it’s somewhere in-between out of focus and barely in focus.

 

So, just kinda see how it goes, 'cause that also takes some getting used to, like a show you can pay attention to, but you don’t need to. Also, this is a sleep podcast…been around since before they were a thing, and I’m not even here to put you to sleep. There is no pressure to fall asleep with this show. I’m gonna be here over an hour so you don’t have to think about falling asleep, that you don’t have to worry about it. I’m here to keep you company whether you're awake or asleep, because there’s people who are listening who can't sleep at all, there’s people who are listening who need a break during the day, and then there’s a lot of people who are barely listening at all.

 

But I’m here to the very end whether you're awake or asleep, and I think that’s one of the things that works about the show, 'cause my job isn't to put you to sleep. It’s just to be here for you as your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your neigh-bore, your bore-bie, your Boris Borlaf, your bores, your bore-bruh, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your best bore-friend f’eva, just to keep you company. So, just see how it goes with that, too. Then the other thing I like to explain in the intro is the structure of the show just so if you're new, I can meet you where you are and tell you how to adjust the show. Most people kind of casually listen to the show linearly, which means they start it and they just let it stop after the end of the episode, and they like listening to this ad-supported version of the show.

 

They wind down during the intro and then they fall asleep at some point during the story. So, when you start out using the podcast, just keep that in mind, but then you can adjust from there. So, the show starts off with a greeting so everybody feels welcomed. You say, oh, okay…friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls…Scoots tried to say something silly. I get the tone of the show. I get that I’m welcome here. Maybe I’ll check it out. Then there’s sponsors so that paying for the show is optional. If you prefer something without ads or you really get a lot out of the show, support it. Then after the support, totally separate from the support, is a long, meandering intro that we're about ten minutes into.

 

It’s usually somewhere…I don't know, ten, fifteen, twenty minutes long where I attempt to explain what the podcast is and then I keep going off topic. I follow a similar structure every single time, but every intro is different. So, it’s kind of like a show within a show or a show to start out the show, or a monologue, I guess, but it’s a similar structure every time. The monologue that has you sawing logs; I don't think I’ve ever said that before. I don't know why they always say sawing logs. It’s just 'cause it sounds so similar, I guess, at least in…only in cartoons. They say, well, who said that? Oh, somebody that watched a lot of cartoons said it, or animated shorts. So, what was my point? Oh, the structure.

 

So, there’s a long, meandering intro, and you say, well, why can't you do it…why wouldn't you just do a two-minute intro or use the same intro over and over again? Well, because it’s like a communal time that we kinda spend together and hang out, but it’s also a time where you get eased into bedtime. ‘Cause what’s never worked for me is just falling asleep, right? There’s not…in my…for me, putting my head on the pillow and drifting off. I need to have a wind-down routine, and that’s what just most studies…for most people works, is having a time to ease into bed, to ease into sleep, to set the mood. So, the intro gives you that time to wind down whether you're getting ready for bed, you're in bed getting comfortable, or you're doing some other chill activity.

 

If you discover as…after you listen a few times, eh, I don't know about these intros, there’s another version of the show called Bedtime Stories from Sleep With Me that just has stories. You say, I just want you to tell me two stories…whatever. You load that up and you put…you set it up in your podcast app. But for most people, this is a hang time and easing into bedtime and maybe doing some chill activity so that when you're in bed, you're a little bit more chilled out, I guess. At least for me, I just do it at this point because I say, well, this is what’s most likely to work to help me fall asleep. Then there’s some support and then there will be our bedtime story. Tonight will be our episodically modular series. So, that just means it’s a bedtime story with recurring characters that you could kinda listen to in any order. I think that’s it.

 

I’m really glad you're here. I work really hard on this show. So do a bunch of other people. We really want to help you fall asleep. We really appreciate your time, or regular listeners that come back episode after episode after episode. I love hearing from you and participating with all of you, the people that interact with the show and keep…enable us to be here. You say, I want to opt in and be a part of this thing; I really appreciate that. So, really glad you're here, and if you do want to opt in as part of the show, here’s a couple messages of ways you might do that. Thanks so much.

 

Alright everybody, welcome to our episodically modular series, Get Besos. You may be new to the show or not so new and be like, what’s episodically modular? What’s Get Besos? Don't worry, I’ll fill you in. Episodically modular with a touch of seriality is what we call our series, which have recurring characters, but they can be listened to in any order. The characters catch you up on everything that’s happening, and you could just view any previous episodes as prequels, really. If you are a completist, you could sleep through these or barely pay attention and then listen to them in order another time, or you could just queue them up in order. That’s so flexible, a quality podcast app; you search right in the feed and you'll be able to find whatever you need.

 

But you could just chill out and listen, and then I’ll fill you…the characters will fill you in…no, I’ll…I guess I’ll fill you in on this one, or maybe I’ll ask the characters to. Yeah, I guess I could try to do that. But basically, Get Besos Big Farm in the Sky PI is a tale of two best friends, Richard Warren and James Cash, who are…were living a post-earthly existence in a place you could call purgatory or limbo or the Beige World, and they used to be titans of retail industry, and they decided, hey, let’s leave our post-earthly realm, because someone…this guy Jiff has messed up the retail industry, in their opinion. They said, let’s find him and just have a sit-down and chat with him.

 

They've done that through season after season after season over the past eleven years, and each time, luckily what they didn’t…unintentionally, they proved that the resilient…the universe is incredibly resilient. So, what a tale. They try to go…I wouldn't call them mentors, but a mentor-like role for somebody, and then they have adventures which change history as we would have known it, but the universe is so resilient. Also, did I mention this is fiction, too? So, it’s a nice journey, an imaginary journey. Tonight we’ll be visiting a ship or a boat, but it’ll be mostly on the boat, so you won't even notice. I think that’s it. We still…we have our Los…Greater Los Angeles Area, AKA Hollywood announcer here, Mr. Antonio Banderas, to set us up. Take it away.

 

The friends beyond the binary, the ladies, the gentlemen, the boys, the girls, it’s time to get Besos. Yeah. Wow, that’s just like old times. Thanks. You just got straight to work today, huh? He nodded in a very satisfactory way, like, yeah, I guess I did. He comes all the way on stored solar energy and…oh, also stored…can we say…? No, he doesn't want me to say that, either. Are you LED…? You could be the first LED…you know, those letters and stuff…like, the first human. You want to talk sustainability? Holy moly. If you were…did you ever do a cameo on The Office? If you did, I think that maybe Michael Scott would say that.

 

Well, actually, he probably would…he’d probably…he wouldn't be…it wouldn't be the same as working with me, but it’d be different…but same vibe, not…it’d be testing your patience. He would test your patience in a different way than I do, though. So, I just…I was just wondering. But yeah, so, he comes all the way here just to do this for the love of the listeners. I mean, he also loves me, but he…I don't like to admit that, except now. I don't know why. Talk about name dropping. Nothing like an imaginary name drop, huh? There’s perks. Imaginary friendship has its perks. Now he’s really laughing. So, yeah, that’s it. Mr. Antonio Banderas…and this is Get Besos Big Farm in the Sky PI. Thanks, everybody.

 

Buddy, buddy, buddy, what do you mean you don’t recognize the name? James Larry Vaughn. Richie, I mean, I recognize those names, and it sounds like a name of someone, but it is a somewhat generic…I can't put a face to that name or even anything, or why now, of all times, you’d just be saying that name over and over again. Okay, James, I’ll give you one more hint; Mayor Larry Vaughn. No, it doesn't…Richie, it doesn't help me at all. I mean, no. Okay, James, close your eyes. Okay. I want you to picture a wonderful sport coat, blueish-gray, gray-blue, with ships’ wheels on it or whales or anything…a nautical sport coat. Okay. Yeah, I got a nautical sport coat in my mind. Okay, James, Mayor Larry Vaughn. Okay, it’s not helping me at all. Okay. He tried to save one of the great islands in the world.

 

Well, the economy of the island. Okay, hm…is this…? This may be a area I’m just not familiar with, Richie. I don't…where are we…what are we…where are we going with this, anyway? I mean, he did all that work; no one…I think you're proving my point, James. No one even remembers him. It’s enough to make me put my hands up. Okay, can you help me…? Okay, it’s one of the three great islands. Okay, I’m not…I mean, there’s a lot of…no offense to islands, but there’s…I don't know…okay, I’ll give you two more hints. Well, could you just…could we just talk about…do I need to guess who…? I mean, I can't…you already told me who he is. I just don’t know who he is. So, how am I gonna guess…? It’s not like I can guess…he’s a mayor. His name’s Larry Vaughn. He wears a nautical sport coat.

 

James, it’s important to remember the important people. Okay, Nantucket, Martha's Vineyard, Mayor Larry Vaughn. Oh, so…there’s a lot of islands that could be the third island. I don't want to…oh my goodness, James, Amity is the third island. Okay. Okay, so…oh, that Larry Vaughn. Oh, the…how did I forget the mayor of…the island of…does Amity stand for positive associations or something? Oh yeah, one of the great three islands. Sorry, I just totally blanked. So, what’s up with…? Holy…I just hadn't thought of him in so long. James, you're doing us a disservice by pretending. Well, here’s a thing; I’m not…I guess I’m trying to humor you because it…why don’t you tell me more about why…? He was…there was…he was in a film, James. Okay, could you tell…? Sure, great. Oh yeah, that…the…okay, now…I remember now.

 

Yeah, no, I know who you're talking about; with Richard Dreyfuss, right? Roy Schneider? Okay, finally. Those are actors, though. I’m talking about the mayor. Okay, so, what’s up with Mayor Larry Vaughn? Well, you may not have remembered this, James, but Larry and I, we would exchange letters. We’d write each other letters. Currently? Oh, currently, James, but currently and before. Before-before or before right now? Before right…well, all…it’s a letter; it became…James, are you trying to do this to me? I mean, I really could use an assistant to help me deal with you. Well, I mean…I was meaning…when on Earth you exchanged letters with him, or post-Earth letters? Post-Earth.

 

I only got in touch with him post-Earth, James, because as we know, that would…believe it or not, he’s the one we would talk…he’s the one who told me a little bit about Les Mis. We’d talk about…I thought…I said, man, he’d…reminds me of me. I was never a mayor, but I said, if I was a mayor, I would…I sent him some tips. I said, well, I like what you were doing, but these are the changes I would…I would send him notes and he would send me letters back. Okay. This sounds really important to you, Richie. What…right…'cause you're bringing it up right now. It sounds really…oh, James, it’s important to us, not to me. Okay, what is important about it? Well, James, he’s been sending me letters. He’s on a ship right now. In fact, the whole time he’s been on a ship. Okay. And he’s working on a ship, James.

 

Okay. So, he’s the…he was the mayor. Now he’s working on a ship. Yeah, in a non…so, that’s when we were exchanging letters. He’s in a non-positive earthly realm. That’s why he liked me so much. It was a…I’m surprised they gave him letters, but…you know, I’d just send it to the ship and he would get it. This is the problem with this world, James; he was once the great mayor of a wealthy area, and now he works on a ship. Like a ship…like he’s a sailor? Oh, no, no, no. He’s…I guess he works…like, you know…like in the restaurant serving food. He organizes lessons for things and he also has to arrange the furniture, because it’s a older ship. It’s in a…it’s kind of in our time period when we were on Earth. Okay, so he’s in a older time period on a ship, working on a ship. Like a cruise ship? Well, a transport, James.

 

A trans…but same concept. Okay, so he’s on that ship right now, working. It’s a non-positive realm. That doesn't sound too bad. So, he was basically a mayor, it didn’t work out for him…also fictional, but apparently now, since you sent him letters, this became real. Oh no, he’s always been real in my heart, James. Correct. So, he’s real now and he’s on the ship and he has to work on the ship, and he can get letters, and maybe he’s got a nice view. So, what is it about this? Well, he…we could go to him, but that’s not the best news, James. This is really not a good use of my time. Discussing it or going…? You just want to go get him off the ship. Is that what you're saying? Oh no, no, James. That’s not it. It’s big news. Okay, so is there some other…you have some other ulterior motive, then? James, no, no, no.

 

He was on my list. Oh, the list you gave to Jiff. Yeah, James, the list you couldn't remember anybody’s names on it other than Jean Val…or…Jean Valjean, no. Inspector Javert, yes. Okay, so, the list you couldn't remember any names from, he’s on that list. Yeah, he’s not very high on the list, though, James. But you're positive he’s on your list. Yeah, so, we're gonna go…we can go to him and we’ll get to…this is a clue, James. No, it is. No, I just…it’s just something in your eye that makes me pause. When you're certain something’s on a list, sometimes it gives me pause and, I don't know, my Richie sense is up. James, you're just deflecting. Maybe you're just jealous that you were never a mayor, either. But so, we’ll go to the ship. We’ll find out…maybe Jiff’s been there.

 

It wasn’t in the letters…or maybe he hasn’t and we just wait there for him, and then we’ll find Jiff. We’ll get Jiff. It’s that simple. Okay, did this…? When you realized that Larry Vaughn was on your list, did it jog your memory of any other people on the list that may be earlier than Larry Vaughn, mayor of…the great mayor? Amity’s mayor, James, not just the great mayor. Okay, so, any other…? No, James. This is who…this is where we're going. Alright, James. So, are you ready to go to the…go? Yeah, well, we were already going. We're already on their ship, so…I mean, our ship. So, I think that’s…is that the ship there? Oh James, that’s a majestic ship. Yeah, let’s land here behind this thing. You think…do you think this is a ship full of mayors, Richie? No, it’s not, definitely not. Well, how do you know? Are there any other mayors on your list?

 

No, there’s no mayors on my list. Larry Vaughn’s the only mayor, Larry Vaughn. Well, I don't know if there was a mayor…there’s other mayors that may be in a non-positive earthly realm. James, I don't even know…let’s get off of here. You think this…our ship will be okay here? Yeah, James, this is a post-earthly realm. Everybody…my…here, put on a suit. Okay, but why? Well, we're gonna pretend we're pass…I don't want to work here. Oh, okay. Well, I thought we were gonna help Larry Vaughn. Can't we just get him and get him in the ship and go? No, James. We have to wait for Jiff. Oh yeah, that’s…sorry, Richie. I totally blanked. Yeah, that’s why I’m here. Ever since we met Nafel, it seems like your ability to follow me as your leader and best friend has waned. Well, I don't think it’s due to Nafel.

 

It’s just due to…okay, that’s fine. So, we're gonna pretend we're customers of the ship until we find Jiff. Okay, 'cause Jiff is gonna come here looking for Larry. Yeah, come on. Okay, excuse me, sir. Excuse me. We're looking for our cabin steward, Larry Vaughn. Okay, could you tell…? Yeah, no, we have special requests. Okay, we’ll go up to the main deck. Alright, James, we’ll go up these stairs. Follow this guy here. Oh, there he is over there, James. He looks very mayory, right? Hey, Larry. I’m James. This is Richie. Good to see you. So, has anybody come by to see you since…? No? Okay. So, is this fine that we…? James, excuse me. Larry, great to see you. Thank you for taking my notes. Where’s your sport…? Oh, you have to wear a uniform on the ship. Okay, so, we're wondering, did you get my last letter? Okay, good.

 

Oh, no, no, no, now’s not the time to talk about that. Have you seen Jiff, though? Yeah, no, no, we’ll talk about the other letter later. James…it’s a personal matter, James, but Larry’s going through…Larry has shared some things with me. Really? Okay. So, yeah. So, Larry, we're look…so, has Jiff come here to see you yet? No. Oh, who’s Jiff? Jiff’s…oh boy, don’t get me started. Jiff was trying to help me with a project, Larry. Oh, can we help you with a project? No, no, we're gonna pretend we're working on the ship. I mean, customers on the ship. Well, we can't…well, I could…Larry, I don't mind helping you. Then maybe you could talk to me, too, about…I’m a pretty good listener, Larry. Richie, you could go down to your cabin or whatever.

 

Well, no, I mean, I need to…I probably need to be…I should probably help Larry by myself. Well, no, we can help…Larry, what do you need help with? Oh, so…okay, oh boy, so…okay, now I’m getting a sense…so, this is a unpleasant earthly realm for you, huh? So, you have to organize all the chairs on this deck. Oh yeah, but when the ship moves, they all slide around. So, they all have to be on those Xs, every chair. Okay, Larry, don't worry, I know post-earthly realms…I know you're in an unpleasant…believe it or not, we’ve been to quite a few post-earthly realms that are unpleasant, so you're actually dealing with experts.

 

I could tell you, Larry, it sounds like…I can't say this too loud, but Richie and I have actually helped people get out of their post-earthly realms, and I gotta believe that for fictional beings…what do you mean I’m…? Well, no, no, I’m just…it’s just terminology. No, you're not a fictional being. I mean, you're not…you were a former…FFB; sorry. Former fictional being. So, yeah, for former fictional beings, it’s my belief that once we get you out of this post-earthly realm, that we…but we kinda have to see it through. But this is different 'cause we also have to wait for Jiff. So, we might as well help you along your journey, 'cause it keeps restarting, just one long day leading towards something. Oh, okay. Okay, so, we have to rearrange these deck chairs. Okay, so let’s get to this, right, Richie?

 

Oh, Richie’s gonna sit down and supervise us, but that’s okay, Larry. So, Larry, you're having a tough time with post-earthly existence. It’s pretty hard. So, what else do you do here on the ship other than rearrange deck chairs? Okay, you serve breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Are the passengers real passengers or are they…? Yeah, they…oh boy. But it seems like every…you know something that you're not telling me, huh? Oh, so you have a sense of it, but you can't quite remember? ‘Cause, yeah, this is pretty common with post-earthly realms. So, you just keep moving these chairs? There’s a lot of chairs here. Holy moly. They keep sliding around. I could see why this would be a long day for you. So, first you move the chairs; okay, that makes sense. Then you gotta go…okay, oh, and then you go do breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

 

Oh, and then you teach some classes in the water; okay. Oh, then…so, you have a supervisor. Man, so you were a mayor, huh? Yeah, I remember how it worked out not great for you, twice. But I…like…that’s okay, though. I remember when you opened that new hotel, huh? So, okay, so then you teach some classes…oh, then you get…so you have a supervisor who…oh, so it’s kinda like…it’s different than I would have thought, if I thought where you would be. But…yeah. Oh, thanks, Richie. Okay. Yeah, these are…these aren't ideal deck chairs, either. Oh, so some of the customers…okay. Okay, so you're on the ship, you're trying to make the most of it, and…oh, that’s what I was wondering; are the customers…you think…are they…?

 

They're in their own non-positive…oh, 'cause you have a sense something’s gonna…the ship…huh. I think I just realized something, Larry. Oh, don't worry about it. It’s…don't worry, we're gonna…hm. I guess I gotta talk to Richie here. You keep working on those chairs, and I’ll keep helping you, and then we’ll help you…oh, what is it, Richie? James, Larry…so, we can help you with the deck chairs, but I would like to be seated at a table for dinner where…with the waiter we discussed. What do you mean, the waiter we discussed? Oh, James, I’m just…I just want to have a little bit of fun. There’s somebody else on this ship I realize I know. What do you mean, you know somebody else on this ship? Were they on your list? Oh no, they're definitely not on my list, James, definitely not on my list.

 

Wait, so, there’s somebody else on the ship that you know? Yeah, and I want them to be my waiter, kinda like…James, just pretend we're like undercover supervisors, like that TV show. Okay, so, we're gonna go to dinner and…? So, how do you know this person? James, believe it or not, this is their ship. What do you mean it’s their ship? Well, in the earthly realm, they ran this company. Okay, so, you have some sort of personal history with this person? Oh yeah, James, definitely…I mean, no, no, no. I mean, we…personal history…no, I’ve never met him. He doesn't know who I am. That’s why I’m going undercover. Okay, Larry…so, okay, let me back up. So, Larry, we're happy to help you here, but it does seem like after dinner, Richie, I get the sense that…so, this ship’s on some sort of timeline. Okay, James, tell me more.

 

I don't know how long the timeline of the ship is, and then it restarts. Okay. So, I don't know if we could stay here…we might have to keep coming back and leaving or hover. I don't know what…how this is gonna work exactly waiting for Jiff. What do you mean, James? That at some point, the realm will shift, and I don't think it’ll…everything won't be accessible to us. Okay, you're not…why are you being so confusing, James? Well, I just…Larry’s gotta do this. I can't…this is kinda like a little bit like time travel, I think. What do you mean? Well, I can't…I just don’t want to tell Larry what’s happening, other than we're here to help you, Larry, and we’ll get you outta here. James, what if…or Richie, what if we get Larry outta here and then…?

 

We could wait until last minute and then me, you, and Larry can leave, and then we’ll…yeah, we could just fly around in the ship and then see if Jiff shows up. I don't know about…or maybe leave Jiff a note or…I don't know what to do. Larry, Richie, I don't know what to do. Right, James, that’s why I’m in charge. We could do that after dinner, after I speak to my…after we have…Larry, is it dinnertime yet? Okay, keep rearranging these chairs. We're almost done. You guys gotta move faster rearranging these chairs, otherwise it’s…Richie, don’t you get what’s happening? Have you never heard of a metaphor in your…? I don't know what you mean, James. Well, why would…what’s…would a metaphor be for in this situation? It’s not in this situation.

 

We're rearranging deck chairs, Richie, in a post-earthly realm, non-positive, post-earthly realm. Right, so you better do it faster so we could get to dinner. Okay, so…okay, let’s just keep an eye…I’ll just keep an eye on everything. It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine. Larry, you're doing great. Oh, you gotta go get ready for dinner service? Okay, it looks like these chairs are all set for the…oh, the Xs are slowly moving to…oh, so that’s the post-dinner deck chair position. Okay. Okay, so…oh, so we don’t have to do it later. Oh yeah, slowly rearranging the deck chairs. Okay. Alright, let’s go to dinner. Richie, so, who’s this person you know? Can you just tell me? I’m not…I’m just wondering if maybe I know them. Oh James, if you knew them, you would not…their name’s Bruce. Okay, Bruce. Are they…? They're not a mayor, though.

 

No, no, Jay Bruce, but we're…how do you say…how’s a fancy way for saying ‘waiter’? I don't…okay. Oh, this is a nice dining room here. It’s very…now I see why we needed to dress up. Yeah, okay. Yeah, come on over. Hi. You're our waiter? What’s your name? Oh, Jay Bruce. Interesting. Do you know who I am, Jay Bruce? Table…Mister…? No, I’m not Mister Table 7. I’m…you don’t know who I am. Mister Table 7; that’s…oh, well…oh, 'cause we're new guests. Oh, so, I’m Richard Warren and this is my friend, James Cash. Oh, I don't know if we’ll be needing you to take…if you're gonna take orders, I think you should think about the orders that you've taken in the past, and…oh, excuse you…no, no, no, you can't…we're in the middle of ordering our dinner. We could come with you? What do you mean, come with you?

 

Oh, sit down, sit down. It’s okay. You could sit down. I’ll tell your…you don’t…okay, sit down, Jay Bruce. Hey, Jay Bruce, I’m James. Sorry. Richie says you two kind of…so, we're…did you know this is a post-earthly realm? Yeah. Yeah, do you know Larry Vaughn? Yeah. So, Richie and I are kinda friends with Larry. So, you…do you know…you don’t…no idea? So, you know this is kind of like this…yeah, do you…are you sensing some foreboding? You are. Okay, well, I think there’s an immediacy to your foreboding, 'cause Richie says he knows you from somewhere. I’ll just apologize ahead of time, because this could be interesting. Go ahead, Richie. What do you mean, interesting, James? So, Jay Bruce, do you remember before when you were on Earth? You were a real titan of…you were a real shipping magnate.

 

Now, I know you had help, family help, to do that. Okay, I’m not trying to…that’s fine. I’m just discussing with you, because there were some shipments you made and some contracts you agreed to. I don't know if you ever remember; Richard Warren, we spoke across the Transatlantic Line, and we negotiated. Yeah, that’s who I am. Exactly. Wait a second. What is it? Is there some…did you feel something? Well, I felt something on my rear end. What do you mean, you felt something on your rear end? It’s this chair. Wait a second, these aren't…those deck chairs, I knew there was something familiar. Well, what is it? These deck chairs…these dining room chairs are from my…these are my dining room chairs. What do you mean, they're your dining room chairs, Richie?

 

These chairs are my dining…Jay Bruce, what is happening here? You already owed me from the shipments you never fulfilled. Okay, can you just…? Okay, so, can we go back really briefly? Or, Jay Bruce, maybe you could tell me…Richie seems displeased with you before the furniture. Is there anything in less than 5,000 words you could tell me that you're aware of? Or maybe you could make a formal apology? Oh, thanks. Yeah, I’m…I haven't spoken in that…I apologize, Richard Warren. James, thank you for asking. I ran a shipping line and we also transported people just like on this ship here. I had negotiated with Richard Warren, and we went back and forth on price, and we never…the agreement may have changed, and I guess maybe I was the one…I guess I apologize, Richard Warren.

 

I kept some of your shipments to make up for a shortfall in pay…that I believed in payments, and I guess that was wrong of me, and I’m sorry and I’m happy to compensate you when I’m in a position to do so. Okay. I mean, it would have been a lot better if you would have done that when we were all on Earth. So, it kinda doesn't mean anything to me, to be honest, but good to hear. Can you go over what…? Yeah, I mean, I was wrong. I guess what I’m saying is I was 100% wrong and you were 100% right, and I’m terribly sorry. Yeah, I’m sorry. Okay, 100% wrong, huh? Yeah, 100% wrong, 1000…I mean, I should have just…you out-negotiated me.

 

So, maybe I was even worse than wrong, because maybe I just was so…you were just such…I just…because, yeah, your brilliance made me act in ways that I need to apologize for. Okay, James, you getting all this? Okay, so basically you two negotiated some shipping agreement and he kept some goods in lieu of payment. Is that what I’m understanding? Oh no, James, that’s what you're saying, and on Earth, that’s what he said. But it’s actually what he’s saying now. He made a terrible error in his negotiating, and then also decided to keep some my goods, yes. Okay, so basically you owe Richie…in Richie’s book, you owe him money. Yeah, I mean, he…well, that was ‘til I sat down in this chair, and now I’m seeing those deck chairs, James. Those are…were not designed for a ship.

 

Those were designed…well, they were fake cruise ship deck chairs, James. What do you mean? Well, those we called the Lido, and they were…we pitched them as a luxury cruise at home. What if you could cruise in your backyard? Transatlantic sailing with a Lido deck chair…and now they're using it on the deck of a ship even though it’s not designed for that. These chairs here? These are dining room chairs, and I guess we're technically in a dining room, but they also serve lunch and dinner here. But yeah, these are from our dinner dining collection. Okay, so, I’m…Bruce, can you help me here? Yeah, so, the situation on this ship is that some of the passengers, they will…we had…so, when the…when we started out going, it just kind of…I just became aware I was working on this ship, right?

 

I have some memories of my time on Earth, like you're both saying. I said, didn’t I use to run a shipping line? I know I traveled on this ship. I didn’t work on it. I mean, I worked on it, right? Then I said, oh, okay, this is my post…there’s a general awareness that this is my post-earthly existence, and then I met Larry, a couple…we have a couple other friends, too. Then…but the customers or the…our guests, as we call them, they…some of them, they like to make it a little more complicated, 'cause it’s just one long day. I don't know, it’s leading towards something, but I can't remember what everything’s leading towards. They…so, then they like to…so, originally we had all the regular deck chairs, dining room chairs, plates…oh boy, if I turn this plate over, is it gonna be an RW…?

 

Yeah, it’s all from your…okay, so, James, basically, the way we were making money is our ships would transport people and goods, and we’d transport a lot of goods for Richard’s store, maybe your store as well. I never said I had a store. I guess I was just assuming. So, at some point we opened up the crates, 'cause I said, well, I know Richard Warren Sears has got some furnishings and home ware, and then we use it 'cause otherwise the…we have to keep serving the customers. It’s part our post-earthly, non-positive existence. So, again, I’m very sorry for that, Richard Warren, and if there’s any way I can make up for it, even in eternity…I could be your assistant or something. Huh. Well, James is already kinda my assistant. I mean, I could be your assistant’s assistant. Oh no, he doesn't need any assistance.

 

Well, I could be like your…assisting you for your lack of assistance. You know what I mean? Oh, now I know what you mean. You'd be my make-up and the gap between the assistance my assistant is offering…the assistance to making that up. Yeah, I mean, those aren't the words…yeah, that’s much brighter than I would have put it. So, I could do that. I’m happy to do that. Okay, so…okay, this is…so, Richie, I’m noticing that Larry’s saying we gotta get back up on the deck. Do you have to…can you…Bruce, can you help us rearrange these chairs? Yeah, I mean, I feel like…yeah, I feel like the chairs are really moving now on the deck, Richie. Okay, James, what does that mean? It means we should probably get going and just take Larry and Bruce with us. Why do I need to take Bruce with us?

 

Well, I thought I was gonna be your assistant’s…the assistant to your…okay, Bruce, just go…please go help Larry. We’ll be on our way. Okay, so, we’ll just help…oh wait, Bruce. What’s that, Bruce? Oh, did you…? Larry said you were looking for someone named Jiff, right? Jiff Besos? Like kisses, right? Yeah, yeah. Has he been here on the ship yet? No, no, no, but I saw on the new passengers…I did see your name, so I was playing with you. I did know who you were. Oh, really? So, Jiff is a new passenger. He’s actually…he was checking your inventory, I think. Checking my…? Wait…oh, that’s a good idea. Maybe Jiff’s…so, where’s that? Oh, that’s below deck where all the shipments are. Okay, Richie, we gotta get down there and get below deck fast. Why, James? Well, because if Jiff’s down there, then…can you show us, Bruce?

 

Well, I gotta go help rearrange the deck chairs, really. Don't worry, it’s straight down all the staircases, bottom floor. The mechanical areas are closed, so you'll see it, the storage. Can you just come with us? Okay, I can come with you. So, go ahead. It’s just down these stairs here. Okay, so, Richie, we’ll get Jiff, we’ll take Larry, we’ll take Bruce. It’s the right thing to do. He’s the one helping us find Jiff. Okay, but I need to make sure that you're gonna…I think we should probably do this inventory, 'cause I gotta see how much stuff you took without my permission. Well, could we just…? If I just…if I’m your assistant forever, wouldn't that make up for it? We could just get off the…I could apologize to you every day. Okay, that may…I don't know. Well, whatever it’s gonna take, Mister RW, I’m happy to…okay, so where’s Jiff?

 

Okay, just through this door here. Right…see those crates? Those are the crates we opened. I’ve gotta go…I’m gonna close this door and go help with the deck chairs, okay? Okay, so…oh my gosh, James, look at…all these crates are opened. They just take the flatware. Okay, Richie, you gotta focus. This ship is a famous ship, like similar to the famous island you were talking about. Oh, this ship’s named after Amity or Nantucket or Martha's Vineyard? None of those. Okay, then…well, why are we in a hurry? Because this ship is…this is a non-positive earthly realm. Okay…and Jay Bruce and Larry are a part of this ship, and I’m not exactly sure when their day resets. Okay, James, why is that important to me? Because the ship will be…the ship’s not gonna be functioning very well.

 

I think it’s already not functioning very well. Okay, so, what does…why is that? Well, because…okay, I don't see Jiff. Jiff, are you in here, man? Jiff? There’s no one in here. Well, Jiff probably got lost or something. I don't know. Okay, let’s go back up on deck. He’s probably on the deck. I think most people on the ship are on the deck at this point. Well, James, these are more deck chairs, so we have to move these deck chairs back into the crates. No, no, we're not rearranging deck chairs not on the deck. Well, I need to get a good count so I know how long Bruce has to work for me for. No, we're not doing that. Oh man, the door’s locked. Okay, what does that mean? It means that Jay Bruce locked us in here. Okay, James, and what does that mean? It means that we find a different way outta here.

 

So, what do you mean, Jay Bruce locked us in here? You didn’t notice Jay Bruce…? Never mind. It doesn't matter. Well, it matters now…not this moment it doesn't matter, because I can just hear all the noise and stuff. We gotta get moving. So, what are we gonna do, James? Well, imagine that this is a pretty big…let’s just go to this other side. Let’s keep…Jiff, are you in here? No, Jiff’s not on the ship. What do you mean, James? Well, what I’m thinking is that Jiff was already here. Okay…and that Jiff probably made some sort of deal with Larry and Bruce. What do you mean? Like, they knew we were coming here. Okay…and then they just played out everything, and they probably are flying away in the frog ship. Why? To…I don't know. Okay, so they just…?

 

Yeah, and I got a feeling if this ship changes…I think they may have…we may have just switched places with them. Okay, that’s not…well, yeah, I’m not…let’s just get out of the storage. We may be able to get up on the deck, 'cause they probably couldn't leave ‘til the deck chairs were rearranged, 'cause they gotta…I think the way I was thinking is there’s certain…if they get the deck chairs rearranged, right, they have some freedom in-between meal services or the other parts of their job, because otherwise how would have Larry sent you letters? Oh, like they have down time, James, like employees on a cruise ship. Yeah, yeah, basically. Okay, so we’ll just go through this vent here. I’m not going through that vent. Okay, well, I’ll go through the vent and then…come on, let’s just go through this vent here.

 

Yeah, we’ll climb up on…this is another crate of Lido chairs. That’s great. Okay, we're just gonna head through here and we're gonna go up, and then…okay, what are we gonna do when we get on deck, James? Well, I can feel some more movement, so let’s keep moving quicker. We’ll get up, and now I’m feeling a overwhelming feeling to rearrange the deck chairs, so that tells me that Larry and Bruce are gone. Oh, maybe that’s why he pinned those flowers on us, the same flowers…these are, yeah, fake flowers that all the other employees of the ship were wearing. Wow, James, you'd never think that this is how post-earthly existences would run. I just don't know why…I guess Jiff must be up to something. Right, James, we're trying to get Jiff. Yeah, but he hasn’t done anything like this before. Okay, so…oh, we're on deck.

 

Everybody’s run…okay, let’s just rearrange these…I don't want to…oh, I feel like we need to rearrange these chairs. Yeah, so, we're gonna rearrange these chairs. Okay, now James, I’m starting to wonder…I’m not feeling great now. Well, yeah, we're…the ship is kind of rocking and rolling. No, it’s something else. Oh, and we got tricked. Oh, it’s something else. And we…you wanted to not just get Jiff, but you also wanted to kinda teach Jay Bruce a lesson. No, it’s something else, James. Is there a sense of…you got a sense that…? Oh James, yeah, I got a sense of something. Okay, don't worry, because actually, Nafel gave me something. So, she’s gonna come get us. Oh, James, that’s…is that deus ex…that cloud…?

 

Yeah, but I’m gonna see if she can…there’s gotta be a way…I don't understand what’s happening with the ship, but I think we should…yeah, she’s clouding up the bottom of the ship, and we're starting to float now. James, is this allowed? I mean, Richie, none of this is allowed. We came here to try to get Larry Vaughn, who’s not…who wasn’t even real ‘til you started sending him letters. Okay, so the ship is now stabilized. Yeah, but I don't know who these passengers are on the ship, so…here, we’ll just hop onto that cloud Nafel’s got. Hey Nafel, how you doing? Yeah, not a great day, no. Those deck chairs do look…those are Lido chairs. They're from Richie’s company. Yeah, they are falling apart, you're right, Nafel.

 

Yeah, they…well, they're not actually…they're only called Lido deck chairs, but they're not for Lido deck chairs. They're not actual…they're…Richie, where would you put a deck chair? James, on your deck at home or your outside thing. I guess they're just not made to be on a actual ship. Yeah, James, they were meant to be transported on the ship. Okay, I guess I apologize, Richie. I was just…yeah, if I was making a deck chair for a ship, it would be different. I’d have no skid pads on the feet, obviously, but my deck chairs are made to be stable on a flat surface. So, that really was unkind of you. No, I was just…it was presumptuous of me. It’s been one of those days, Richie. I apologize. Well, I don't…I think I’d rather see your apology in action, in assistance than…okay, so, the next action is…Nafel, can you…?

 

Oh, you're gonna have all your…that’s a great idea. So, Nafel’s kids, the horse lords and horse ladies, are gonna come on the ship. Oh, okay, so Nafel’s gonna take care of the ship for a while. Yeah, 'cause I don't know if…I don't know the intentions of everybody on board. But now that you've disrupted the cycle or that we all did, maybe you could help everybody, Nafel, and the horse lords and horse ladies…? Hey, yeah, good. Nice braying. I like that bray. Yeah, it’s a nice bray. Then Richie and I are gonna have to get back to…oh, so, you know that the frog ship got taken by…yeah. So, we’ll have to get to Florida, I guess, and meet up with our PI, and then figure out where Jiff is. I guess this was a bit of a…this was a pointless meander, Richie. No, James, we found out that they were using my deck chairs without permission.

 

Yeah, and what a day. Let’s rest on this cloud, and then we’ll probably be…Nafel’s gonna transport us to Florida. Okay, Richie. I’m actually tired from moving those chairs. I don't know if you actually moved any chairs, but nothing like rearranging those deck chairs. They were like deck chairs from a different deck on a different deck. Is that what the metaphor is, James? Sure, Richie. It’s not all deck chairs are for the same deck, yeah. James, you're not playing with a full set of deck chairs. Goodnight, Richie. Goodnight, James. Sleep well.

 

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes)

Get Besos / Big Farm in the Sky PI

 

Snoring Facts

https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/ss/slideshow-snoring-myths-facts

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/snoring/symptoms-causes/syc-20377694

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/why-do-people-snore-answers-for-better-health

 

Jaws / The Mayor

https://lawturley.medium.com/why-we-all-hate-larry-vaughn-the-pos-mayor-of-amity-in-jaws-c1d8296a7ca8

https://thedailyjaws.com/blog/why-mayor-vaughn-made-all-the-right-moves-in-jaws

https://people.com/politics/jaws-mayor-vaughn-meme-how-did-he-win-reelection/

 

Undercover Boss

https://medium.com/@mantillaryanl/how-real-is-undercover-boss-dbd02a29c84e

https://collider.com/undercover-boss-real-or-fake/

https://www.ranker.com/list/fascinating-facts-you-didn-t-know-about-undercover-boss/donn-saylor

 

Nautical Style

https://www.thegentlemansjournal.com/article/how-to-channel-nautical-style-and-not-look-like-a-sailor/

https://www.lick.com/us/blog/interior-trends-nautical-decor-style

https://www.kingstonbrass.com/blogs/blog/nautical-style-and-coastal-style-whats-the-difference?srsltid=AfmBOoqQT48fAFqDhc_0k0QsnysOvcI0EZs5k0lapnj-bsujpBL6KHXU

 

DOWN TO BUSINESS

I’m here to slow it down

Something mildly distracting

A kind of personal service

So good to snooze you again

 

PLUGS

Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

 

SPONSORS

Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Quince; Mint Mobile; Marley Spoon; Clean Power Alliance’s EV Smart Charge

 

INTRO

Thoughts that can seem so rational

I wish those feelings came up to me instead of within me

A direct approach at bedtime doesn’t work

Saying the direct approach doesn’t work is, itself, too direct

A lose lose situation

A subtle thing but a true thing

Other listeners are rooting for you

Caught in a winless situation

Case of The Winless Situation: A Sleep With Me Sports Story

It’s not most people’s taste, especially at first

Always never getting started

The meaning comes from its meaninglessness

Is that a sitcom under your pillow?

I just got rolled by my own brain

A sleep podcast from back when those weren’t a thing

Your Bore Friend, etc.

Explaining the show structure

The monologue that has you sawing logs

Just falling asleep has never worked for me

The Wind Down Routine

 

STORY

Welcome to Get Besos

Episodically modular with a touch of seriality

Maybe the characters will fill you in this time

RS and JC, former titans of retail industry

Trying to sit down and chat with Jiff

Proving the resiliency of the universe

Mentor-Like Roles

Tonight we’ll mostly be on a boat

Great Los Angeles Area Announcer, Antonio Banderas

A classic, brief intro from Antonio Banderas

Antonio, are you LEED certified?

An imagined Antonio cameo on The Office

Testing Antonio’s patience

Nothing like an imaginary name drop

The name Larry Vaughn

A somewhat generic name

RW keeps saying Larry Vaughn

Mayor Larry Vaughn

Picture a wonderful sportcoat

A nautical sportcoat

He tried to save an island and no one remembers him

One of the 3 great islands

Nantucket, Martha’s Vineyard, Amity!

That Larry Vaughn

He was in a film!

That movie with Roy Scheider and Richard Dreyfuss

Mayor Vaughn and RW exchange letters

Post-Earth Letters

He reminds RW of what RW would be like as a mayor

Now he’s working on a ship in a non-positive Earthly realm

He’s not a sailor

But he moves furniture and organizes events

Transporter ship, kind of like a cruise

He’s always been real (in RW’s heart)

They could go to him

LV was on RW’s list of people to help

RW thinks this is a clue

JC’s Richie Sense is up

RW thinks this is the way to get to Jiff

That’s a majestic ship right there!

Definitely not a shipful of mayors

Put on a suit, James

They have to pretend their passengers

Looking for our cabin steward, Larry Vaughn

Introducing themselves to LV

Has LV seen Jiff?

Let’s not talk about that one personal letter right now

Jiff hasn’t come yet

RW tries to explain Jiff

Organizing all the slippery chairs on the deck

Believe it or not, Larry, we’re experts

Former Fictional Being (FFB)

We might as well help LV if we’re waiting for Jiff

Rearranging deck chairs

LV isn’t sharing something

It’s a lot of chairs to move around

Then he has to teach a class

And now he has a supervisor

It didn’t work out well for him as mayor twice

Not Ideal Deck Chairs

Are the customers in a non-positive place too?

RW wants to be seated for table at dinner in a special way

There’s someone else on the ship that RW wants to meet

It’s like that show, Undercover Supervisors

On Earth, this person ran this ship company

This ship is on some sort of timeline and then it restarts

Not sure how that will affect RW and JC

At some point, the realm will shift and will not be accessible to us

JC is hiding something

What if we try to get LV out of here and leave a note for Jiff?

RW knows he has to be in charge

Waiting until dinner

RW, have you not heard of this metaphor before? Rearranging deck chairs…?!

Post-Dinner Deck Chair Position (PDDCP)

This mystery person is named J. Bruce

Mr. J. Bruce

JB doesn’t recognize them

RW wants to order dinner

Sit down, J. Bruce

Checking in with JB

Are you sensing some foreboding, JB?

JB, do you remember being a shipping magnate on Earth?

RW had some shipping contracts with JB

RW felt something on his rear end

These are RW’s dining room chairs!

What is going on here?

J Bruce speaks

JB apologizes to RW

JB ran a shipping line that transported people

JB unfairly kept some shipments to make up for a lack of payment

And he apologizes for that

JB makes a real apology

100% Wrong

The Lido Deck Chair, a deck chair built for land, not sea!

Those are the deck chairs on the boat. The ones from RW’s home goods collection

JB explains the situation

JB was generally aware this was his post-Earthly existence

JB’s ships made money by shipping goods

At one point, they opened up the crates

He had to keep serving the demanding customers

So he had to use RW’s home goods

An assistant’s assistant

LV says they have to get back up on the deck

The chairs are really moving now

We should probably get going and take LV and JB with us

RW doesn’t want to help JB

JB saw Jiff’s name on the passenger list

Jiff is a new passenger!

Jiff is checking the inventory

Let’s get below deck!

Heading towards Jiff

JB has to go help LV with the deck chairs

This ship is a very famous ship, RW!

We don’t have much time!

The ship won’t function well pretty soon

No one is in here

Let’s go back up on the deck

RW wants to pack up his crates but JC won’t do it

Uh oh, the door is locked

JB locked us in here!

Jiff probably made some sort of deal with JB and LV to trap us

They’re probably gonna fly away on our frog ship!

RW doesn’t want to escape through a vent

Escaping through a vent to the deck

JC now feels an overwhelming feeling to rearrange deck chairs

LV and JB are now gone and have swapped places with us!

Jiff has never done something like this before

The ship is really rocking now

RW doesn’t feel good but can’t put his finger on it

A sense of things to come

Nefell gave us something to help

Nefell is clouding up the bottom of the ship

The ship is floating and is stabilized!

Nefell whisks them away

Where would you choose to place a deck chair?

Debating about deck chair placements

It’s just been one of those days

Nefell and the horse lords are going to take care of the ship for a while

Disrupting the cycle

They’ll have to meet up with PI in Florida somehow

What a day

Let’s rest on this cloud for the time being

Nothing like rearranging deck chairs

Not all deck chairs are for the same deck

 

SUMMARY:

Episode: 1356

Title: Rearranging Deck Chairs | Get Besos in the Sky PI 10

Plugs: Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

Sponsors: Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Quince; Mint Mobile; Marley Spoon; Clean Power Alliance’s EV Smart Charge

Notable Language:

• A lose lose situation
• A Winless Situation
• The monologue that has you sawing logs
• Episodically modular with a touch of seriality
• Mentor-Like Roles
• Mayor Larry Vaughn
• A nautical sportcoat
• Post-Earth Letters
• Non-Positive Earthly Realm
• Richie Sense
• Former Fictional Being (FFB)
• Not Ideal Deck Chairs
• Post-Dinner Deck Chair Position (PDDCP)
• 100% Wrong
• An assistant’s assistant

 

Notable Culture:

• • Case of The Winless Situation: A Sleep With Me Sports Story
  • Boris Karloff
  • JC Penney
  • Sears
  • Amazon
  • LEED Certification
  • Antonio Banderas

• Jaws

• • Roy Scheider
  • Richard Dreyfuss

• Undercover Bosses

• Titanic

 

Notable Talking Points:

• Thoughts that can seem so rational
• I wish those feelings came up to me instead of within me
• A direct approach at bedtime doesn’t work
• Saying the direct approach doesn’t work is, itself, too direct
• A lose lose situation
• A subtle thing but a true thing
• Other listeners are rooting for you
• Caught in a winless situation
• Case of The Winless Situation: A Sleep With Me Sports Story
• It’s not most people’s taste, especially at first
• Always never getting started
• The meaning comes from its meaninglessness
• Is that a sitcom under your pillow?
• I just got rolled by my own brain
• A sleep podcast from back when those weren’t a thing
• Your Bore Friend, etc.
• Explaining the show structure
• The monologue that has you sawing logs
• Just falling asleep has never worked for me
• The Wind Down Routine
• Welcome to Get Besos
• Episodically modular with a touch of seriality
• Maybe the characters will fill you in this time
• RS and JC, former titans of retail industry
• Trying to sit down and chat with Jiff
• Proving the resiliency of the universe
• Mentor-Like Roles
• Tonight we’ll mostly be on a boat
• Great Los Angeles Area Announcer, Antonio Banderas
• A classic, brief intro from Antonio Banderas
• Antonio, are you LEED certified?
• An imagined Antonio cameo on The Office
• Testing Antonio’s patience
• Nothing like an imaginary name drop
• The name Larry Vaughn
• A somewhat generic name
• RW keeps saying Larry Vaughn
• Mayor Larry Vaughn
• Picture a wonderful sportcoat
• A nautical sportcoat
• He tried to save an island and no one remembers him
• One of the 3 great islands
• Nantucket, Martha’s Vineyard, Amity!
• That Larry Vaughn
• He was in a film!
• That movie with Roy Scheider and Richard Dreyfuss
• Mayor Vaughn and RW exchange letters
• Post-Earth Letters
• He reminds RW of what RW would be like as a mayor
• Now he’s working on a ship in a non-positive Earthly realm
• He’s not a sailor
• But he moves furniture and organizes events
• Transporter ship, kind of like a cruise
• He’s always been real (in RW’s heart)
• They could go to him
• LV was on RW’s list of people to help
• RW thinks this is a clue
• JC’s Richie Sense is up
• RW thinks this is the way to get to Jiff
• That’s a majestic ship right there!
• Definitely not a shipful of mayors
• Put on a suit, James
• They have to pretend their passengers
• Looking for our cabin steward, Larry Vaughn
• Introducing themselves to LV
• Has LV seen Jiff?
• Let’s not talk about that one personal letter right now
• Jiff hasn’t come yet
• RW tries to explain Jiff
• Organizing all the slippery chairs on the deck
• Believe it or not, Larry, we’re experts
• Former Fictional Being (FFB)
• We might as well help LV if we’re waiting for Jiff
• Rearranging deck chairs
• LV isn’t sharing something
• It’s a lot of chairs to move around
• Then he has to teach a class
• And now he has a supervisor
• It didn’t work out well for him as mayor twice
• Not Ideal Deck Chairs
• Are the customers in a non-positive place too?
• RW wants to be seated for table at dinner in a special way
• There’s someone else on the ship that RW wants to meet
• It’s like that show, Undercover Supervisors
• On Earth, this person ran this ship company
• This ship is on some sort of timeline and then it restarts
• Not sure how that will affect RW and JC
• At some point, the realm will shift and will not be accessible to us
• JC is hiding something
• What if we try to get LV out of here and leave a note for Jiff?
• RW knows he has to be in charge
• Waiting until dinner
• RW, have you not heard of this metaphor before? Rearranging deck chairs…?!
• Post-Dinner Deck Chair Position (PDDCP)
• This mystery person is named J. Bruce
• Mr. J. Bruce
• JB doesn’t recognize them
• RW wants to order dinner
• Sit down, J. Bruce
• Checking in with JB
• Are you sensing some foreboding, JB?
• JB, do you remember being a shipping magnate on Earth?
• RW had some shipping contracts with JB
• RW felt something on his rear end
• These are RW’s dining room chairs!
• What is going on here?
• J Bruce speaks
• JB apologizes to RW
• JB ran a shipping line that transported people
• JB unfairly kept some shipments to make up for a lack of payment
• And he apologizes for that
• JB makes a real apology
• 100% Wrong
• The Lido Deck Chair, a deck chair built for land, not sea!
• Those are the deck chairs on the boat. The ones from RW’s home goods collection
• JB explains the situation
• JB was generally aware this was his post-Earthly existence
• JB’s ships made money by shipping goods
• At one point, they opened up the crates
• He had to keep serving the demanding customers
• So he had to use RW’s home goods
• An assistant’s assistant
• LV says they have to get back up on the deck
• The chairs are really moving now
• We should probably get going and take LV and JB with us
• RW doesn’t want to help JB
• JB saw Jiff’s name on the passenger list
• Jiff is a new passenger!
• Jiff is checking the inventory
• Let’s get below deck!
• Heading towards Jiff
• JB has to go help LV with the deck chairs
• This ship is a very famous ship, RW!
• We don’t have much time!
• The ship won’t function well pretty soon
• No one is in here
• Let’s go back up on the deck
• RW wants to pack up his crates but JC won’t do it
• Uh oh, the door is locked
• JB locked us in here!
• Jiff probably made some sort of deal with JB and LV to trap us
• They’re probably gonna fly away on our frog ship!
• RW doesn’t want to escape through a vent
• Escaping through a vent to the deck
• JC now feels an overwhelming feeling to rearrange deck chairs
• LV and JB are now gone and have swapped places with us!
• Jiff has never done something like this before
• The ship is really rocking now
• RW doesn’t feel good but can’t put his finger on it
• A sense of things to come
• Nefell gave us something to help
• Nefell is clouding up the bottom of the ship
• The ship is floating and is stabilized!
• Nefell whisks them away
• Where would you choose to place a deck chair?
• Debating about deck chair placements
• It’s just been one of those days
• Nefell and the horse lords are going to take care of the ship for a while
• Disrupting the cycle
• They’ll have to meet up with PI in Florida somehow
• What a day
• Let’s rest on this cloud for the time being
• Nothing like rearranging deck chairs
• Not all deck chairs are for the same deck