1092 – Lulling with Lasso | Pilot S1E1

Notable Language:

• I’ve reached Total Incompletion
• Pure Joy, No Adulteration
• Profound Mediocrity

Notable Culture:

• Ted Lasso
• David Hockney
• Sugar Ray Leonard

Notable Talking Points:

• Hey, maybe you’re painting your toenails
• There may not be an end to the pop culture references
• Ted Lasso’s Bad Sleep Hygiene

Episode 1092 – Lulling with Lasso | Pilot S1 E1

 

[START OF RECORDING]

 

SCOOTER:    Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster that wonders one, how does that drink company that makes sparkling water get key lime and limoncello to taste slightly creamy?  The other question is even though I enjoy it, is that a good idea, even if it’s possible?  Well, you know what time it is.  These are the questions you could ponder, but probably not at bedtime because you don’t…while I do have sparkling water near my bed sometimes, the real sparkle are the stars in your eyes, but your eyes are closed, but I can still see them because I can feel them, because it’s time for Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep.  Thanks for making it possible, patrons.

 

INTRO:    [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing?  Trouble getting to sleep?  Trouble staying asleep?  Well, welcome.  This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep.  We do it with a bedtime story.  Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press play.  I’m gonna do the rest.  What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake, whether that’s thoughts on your mind, things you’re thinking about, so thoughts, things from the past, the present, the future, just stuff in your mind, on your mind.  A lot of my thoughts, now that I’m thinking about it, they’re attached to a imaginary future.  So, it’s not even the future, actually.

 

Thoughts, feeling…oh, anything you’re feeling physically that’s coming up or emotionally that you’re experiencing.  It could be other things like changes in routine, it could be someone…you’re traveling, it could be a guest, you could be anticipating something, going through something.  Whatever it is, it could be a ton of different stuff but whatever it is, we’re here, I’m here, we’re all here together in the deep, dark night.  That’s one reminder, is whatever you’re going through, there’s a lot of other people out there tossing, turning, mind racing, physical sensations, feelings, thoughts, trouble getting to sleep, trouble staying asleep.  So, while we might not know exactly what you’re going through, you’re not alone.  We’re feeling it too, so we can relate.  So, what was my…?

 

Whatever…thoughts…whatever’s keeping you awake, I’m here to take your mind off of that and keep you company so that you could fall asleep.  To make the deep, dark night less lonely is really what my job is, and the way I do that is I have a safe place set aside here that I can smooth, that I can pat, that I can rub down, then I can send it across the deep, dark night to you.  I can use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, superfluous tangents, which means my voice is not traditionally soothing; it’s a bit different.  I’m gonna go off-topic, I’m gonna get mixed up, I’m gonna forget what I was talking about, then I’ll repeat myself, I may pause, then I may forget, then I say wait a second, and then I’ll…then I may change the subject, forget to go back to what I was talking about that didn’t make any sense anyway.

 

Here’s something; I don’t know if I’ve ever described the pod…this podcast is completely full of incomplete thoughts.  Incomplete thoughts when they get to this podcast, they say in a non-ironic way, you complete me.  But I mean, but it has some irony to it, but it’s not a…it’s un-ironic.  Is that possible?  Someone just said…some part of my brain just said another word that ends in -ronic to describe me.  Like, if you combined -ronic with mo.  They said, that statement is also…they would combine those two together, those sounds.  But I’d say well, are you sure about that?  Because when a incomplete thought gets here, it says I feel completed.  I feel like my journey’s complete.  Okay, technically you got me.  I was paraphrasing the incomplete…I was incompletely communicating in incomplete thoughts thoughts.

 

There could be yet another…I think we have part of a book there, Completing Incomplete…Completing…that’s…that’s not…I don’t know.  What’s a word that’s not ironic?  It’s like I’m completing incomplete thoughts.  Incomplete thoughts; completed.  Completely completing incomplete thoughts, completely.  Incomplete thoughts, you…there’s another…it’s a two-way street, too; I say, you complete me, too.  I see you.  I see you, dear one, just like I say every morning.  I write that out; I see you, dear one.  Do not be…I got that from Ruth…Dr. Ruth King.  I see you, dear one.  Do not be afraid.  I’m here to help.  I say that to my incomplete thoughts and they say it to me, it seems like it.  So, I’m completely off-topic here because…but right on topic.

 

So, I’m gonna try to create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake, and I’m gonna send my…oh no, I went through that part already.  See?  I told you there’d…that was kind of a pointless meander.  I went back…right back to where I already was.  So, oh, whatever it is that’s keeping you awake, yeah, I’m here to take your mind off of that with these different techniques I use.  So polished are these techniques.  You may say they’re…you say they’re over-polished ‘cause you got to the shaggy core or the rough…you say…and I say yeah, that’s my job.  I’m still trying to think of any more analogies I could make out of incomplete thoughts that are completed, that feel completed.  Okay, I…you got me, brain.  You say, you’re not completing incomplete thoughts.

 

I say no, I’m giving them a sense of completion and validation that they’ve reached the end of their journey and they can go…you know.  How about that?  Now, while you’re…while we’re having a lighthearted debate internally here, which big farm would you want to go to?  The farm for completed thoughts or in…’cause it sounds like that would be a pretty wide open space, the next level of existence for incomplete thoughts.  It might…you say…it could be…it probably it pretty surrealistic.  Or maybe that’s where in…maybe that’s where they…oh, wait a second, I didn’t even think about this; you say opposites attract.  Are there any thought completists out there that are listening that are on the edge of their seat?  They’re like oh boy, I can’t wait to…I don’t know why, but I can’t wait to see what he says next, because I could complete it.

 

I mean, it is the Sleep With Me take-home game for listeners, is completing my incomplete thoughts.  So there you go, there’s another way we’re all working together here.  Now if you’re new, you’re probably already confused.  You may be taken aback in a small way, because this podcast is very different.  It’s not what most people expect out of a sleep podcast.  Even though we were kinda the first sleep podcast on the block, it still doesn’t…our…the show still doesn’t make a lot of sense, so I’m gonna try to explain it to you.  But if you’re here and you are confused or taken aback, that’s totally normal, or skeptical or doubtful or irritated.  Those are very normal ways to get to the podcast, ‘cause you probably tried a lot of stuff to fall asleep.

 

You probably had some reasonable expectations when you got here and you probably tried a lot of different stuff to help you get to sleep, like we all have, and none of it’s worked, so that’s why you’re here.  So, let me just give you some information to meet your skepticism on a equal plane, and maybe on the same plane where complete thoughts and incomplete thoughts are connecting deeply.  I didn’t even think about that, but oh boy, are they.  But so, what was my point?  Oh, so if you’re new, a couple things to know.  One, this podcast, most people don’t like it the first time.  It doesn’t work for them.  Millions of regular listeners have said took two or three tries for me to get used to the show.  Sometimes more; sometimes years, because the podcast is so different.

 

It takes a while to realize you only barely kind of listen to the show.  It’s almost somewhat of passive listening.  You kind of listen when you feel like it, but you don’t listen or pay attention the whole time.  So, if you’re skeptical or doubtful, just give it a few tries and see how it goes, ‘cause this is a podcast you don’t really listen to.  It’s also a podcast that doesn’t put you to sleep.  I’m here to keep you company while you fall asleep.  I’m here to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bestie, your bore-bor, your neigh-bore, your bore-bud, your bore-bruh if you’re in the San Diego area.  Whatever it is, whichever role I can fill, I’m here to keep you company while you drift off, to take your mind off of stuff, for you to just barely listen to me.  I’m here to talk.  You don’t need to listen.

 

You don’t have to do anything except barely go along for the ride.  So, those are two things to know.  Oh, the reason I make the show; I kinda talked about it earlier, but one, I’ve been there, tossing…I’ve been…all that stuff.  So, I know how it feels.  But more importantly, the fact is that you deserve a good night’s sleep.  You deserve a place you could rest.  You deserve a bedtime you don’t dread, that you feel good about, and if I could be a part of providing that for you so that your life is more manageable, that your life’s a little bit easier, that you could flourish, that’s my dream come true, really.  So, that’s why I make the show and it’s a pleasure and a dream to be able to do it on a regular basis and put all this work in, is because if it can help, I know how it feels and I know it’s important, and that if your life’s better, the world we live in will be a better place to be in.

 

Other things that throw new people off is the structure of the show.  Oh boy, does it get a strong response.  The structure of the show is kind of like your…you can adjust how you listen to the podcast, but let me just explain to you, ‘cause it does have a very deliberate structure.  Show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, so you feel seen and welcome.  Then I usually say something silly and goofy so you say okay, the show’s welcoming, but it’s a little bit funny, or almost…not quite funny, but almost…he almost got there.  Incompletely funny; there’s one.  That could be an unauthorized bio…Incompletely Funny: The Jokes…That’s a Statement Describing the Jokes on Sleep With Me.  I guess…yeah, it should…could be in pam…it could fit on a index card, I guess.

 

So…oh, so the stow…show starts off like that, then there’s support, support so the podcast can come out twice a week for free, wherever you want to listen to it.  Then there’s support for listeners who are having a tough time, then there’s supports for the community…support for the communities around the show and ways you could take action or learn more, then there’s the intro.  The intro goes from, whatever, I don’t know, six or eight minutes into the show ‘til twenty, twenty-five, twenty, eighteen, thirteen, twelve, eleven minutes into the show, depending on how long it is.  The intro sometimes gets lumped in with the support, but it’s actually a show within a show that eases you into bedtime.  It serves a purpose.  It’s different every time so that your brain can’t adjust, so you have something to look forward to; talking to your bore-friend.

 

Who knew he would talk so long about incomplete…completing incomplete thoughts and try to put it…put a little bow on it where it says you complete me?  What if I got…what if I got…I wonder if anybody’s left a incomplete thought on my door…I have, on my doorstep, before, but with a bow; ‘please complete me’.  That would be a futile effort.  If you…don’t do that; don’t deliver an incomplete thought at my doorstep with a note ‘please complete me’ unless you mean it in that other non-ironic but whatever it is sense beyond my…unless you mean it in a way beyond my understanding, ‘cause me completing thoughts, that’s a tall, tall task, a lifetime journey.

 

So I’d say, I guess…say one day, many…that’s what I’d say to the incomplete thought in the basket; one day, after many, many attempts to complete you and arranging you in ways that may be unpleasant at the time, if everything goes well, you’ll go on your own journey to completion and you’ll look back and you’ll say, your ability to de-complete me allowed me to complete me.  So, I’m glad…I’m partially glad I was left on your doorstep as a complete thought…incomplete thought.  Then maybe the thought…or then if it was a twin, it would say didn’t you realize the other one was a complete thought?  You de-completed it and it was never completed.  I’d say oh boy, it sounds like I’ve drifted into…over the brain…some sort of brain barrier of total incom…I’ve reached total incompletion.

 

Okay, so, the intro goes on and on and on so you get stuff like that every time, but it also is part of people’s wind-down routine.  There are 2% of listeners that skip the intro, but for most listeners…some are falling asleep; that’s great for them.  Oh boy, are we happy for you.  Looking good.  But for most listeners, it takes us some time to wind down, so the intro is part of their bedtime routine, whether they’re getting ready for bed, they’re in the room doing something calm, or they’re in bed getting comfortable, or they’re somewhere else, looking at the stars or whatever it is.  Maybe you’re painting your toenails.  How about that?  Looking good.  Holy…I love that color.  I like how you…I like those foam things between your toes, too.

 

I was gonna make a joke about it, but…leave it…let’s leave that as a incomplete joke, ‘cause I was just gonna make something smarmy, like those aren’t foam triangles.  I say, okay.  Oh no, they’re cubes.  Okay, thank you.  Thanks for making a positive joke out of a negative one.  Yeah, okay.  So…oh, that’s the intro, then there’s support for sponsors between the intro and the show, again so the podcast can come out twice a week for free, over 500 episodes or around 500 episodes in the…wherever you want to listen to them.  Then there’s our story.  Tonight, it’ll be a recap of Season 1, Episode 1, the pilot of Ted Lasso.  Talk about…we’re calling it…I don’t know, Lulling and Learning from Lasso or something.  I don’t know what I’m calling it, but that’s what I’m calling it right now.

 

You can’t keep…just like you can’t keep a gaffer from his pitch, you can’t keep a gabber from his itch to take your mind off of stuff and not get to the point.  So, I’m so happy to be covering that.  Such a brilliant show.  Then there will be some thank-yous at the end.  So, that’s the structure of the show, that’s how the show works.  It is very different.  Give it a few tries, see how it goes.  Again, you could always adjust and start the show at twenty minutes, but most listeners find their own way after listening for a while what works best for them.  But I’m glad you’re here.  I work really hard, I yearn and I strive, and I really hope I can help you fall asleep.  Thanks again for coming by, and here’s a couple of ways I’m able to do it for you for free twice a week.

 

Alright everybody, Scoots here.  We’re doing a little…or we’re doing…this is…I totally was like, I’m not in the…like, I’m in the mood to record the show, but I’m so…some of my behaviors are so learned after doing…or practiced that I should have paused before I hit Record, but I hit Record, I started recording or speaking…but this is great news.  This is something new we haven’t done, and I’m not even sure how it’s gonna go, ‘cause I had an idea…so, we’re…this is a TV recap of a show, and it fits in the kinda slot and style of the show we did with The Good Place.  I said, this is gonna be Lulling and Learning from Lasso, so we’re gonna be talking about Ted Lasso, Season 1 over the next however many episodes.  My ideal thing could…because…and this has been something I’ve been thinking about for a while, and I do like the show’s buildup a little bit of a few seasons, just…so I have some lead time.

 

I don’t know.  That’s just…so, it’s like, I’ve jumped on some shows when they’ve started in the past, but it’s nice because I was able to watch Season 1, then watch Season 1 again with other people, and watch as the show has progressed, but then going back now and watching Season 1 for the podcast.  But one of the things I was struck by when I’ve been watching it for pleasure is learning from Lasso, like I said, but also learning from everybody on the show; Rebecca, the Beard, and down the line.  So, we might get some Nate eye-rolls, but no, let’s see what we can learn from Nate, too, but more by example; not something…I don’t know if this is the correct word of…didactic, but it is something through example.  But maybe in a more…I don’t know.

 

Maybe this will be more of a concede of this…how it’ll go, the meanders and stuff, or maybe it won’t.  We’ll find out because we’re new.  I mean, this is our first time doing it.  But I do think about that with The Good Place.  I mean, we did…and TNG, how those examples were set forth.  Other shows too have good examples, but I think…there’s the humanist background to Star Trek, and then this moral compass part of The Good Place.  I haven’t got a chance to read the book yet.  So, I don’t know.  I think…and I do think there is this counter-cultural-type thing.  Another thing I guess…so, this will be a tangent before we get to Episode 1.  Maybe we won’t even do Episode 1 right now.

 

I think we will, but is that…I think it’s also…I’m trying to think how to put this, because I…this idea of writing Ted Lasso off or the show off as a piece of aw, shucks optimism is something I have…had put on me too before, and sometimes I push back on that a little bit too hard and I say no, no, no.  But the podcast springs out of the deep, dark night, and I think that’s pretty clear in Ted Lasso too, that it’s something…that there’s a depth beyond the surface and that it’s not…is that vacuous or whatever?  So, I don’t know.  I guess that’s the end of my…tangent ended.  So, I don’t know, let’s run through my notes and then visually watch the episode, because I’m just feeling like for this first episode…and then we’ll see…we’ll check our time, ‘cause…because of these episodes’ length, maybe it’ll give us some time to do some facts.

 

Then I’m also like, how many facts do you need to be…Ted Lasso is learning through Season 1, too.  But yeah, so, Season 1, Episode 1, pilot, music?  Question mark.  Training, goal moves.  Wha…?  Something.  Muse…bad…window.  Music…thinking face.  It doesn’t say bad thinking face.  What does that say?  Window…I think that…if I spelled window I-W-N-T-E-T, but one…the Ts are slanting towards one another.  Music…something thinking face.  Panting?  Fifth anniversary?  This is…oh, painting.  Fifth anniversary…Hockney, tabloids.  George, we, assertive.  George…we…George is here, maybe?  Maybe…that’s that coach.  Short-shorts…buyout contract.  I put assertive ‘cause I think…huh, that’s interesting; the first example is set by Rebecca that we can learn from, in that Rebecca’s assertiveness is something I could learn from.

 

I don’t know.  I think she’s very assertive here.  I mean, it’s…well, I guess…I’m trying to think of…I hope you’ve seen Season 1 of Lasso when you’re watching this, but I guess I’m trying to respect…some of the journeys of the season are so good.  Football…is that what that says?  F-U-T-O-O-B-A-L-L, average.  Liam and Noel; not an oasis.  Pee pee off…no raisins in my salad.  Then it took…I realized that that was a joke or a callback to Liam and Noel not oasis, I think.  Raisins…if you watch the episode, you…it took me…this was on my second podcast watch; I said oh, Rebecca’s referring to something else.  Does that say SVP?  AFC Richmond…Lasso.  Sweet Ted.  Oh no, SVP; yeah, Scotty Van Pelt.  So, they set up…Scott Van Pelt kinda does our first introduction to Ted from AFC Richmond, and Ted’s…so, they do a lot of…it’s the pilot, right?

 

So they have to do a lot of explaining, and they do it well.  They really do it efficiently, in my opinion.  So, this is the one where…so, we meet Rebecca and we meet Higgins, briefly.  I think; is Higgins in this?  Yeah.  We see that Higgins…and again, well-done, well-written shows do not…again, don’t get distracted by the surface ‘cause maybe you’re seeing your reflection or you’re seeing the sky and you’re not looking in.  So, okay, so Scotty Van Pelt sets up who Ted…the joyous Ted Lasso.  A moment of joy.  Beautiful game.  Lavatory?  Oh yeah, so then…oh man, I just can’t believe all these choices.  I really just kept liking them.  So, we…then our first contact with Ted…the real Ted Lasso is he’s coming out of a bathroom.  We see he’s reading Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac.  Well, we don’t see that, but if you…it took some investigation.

 

We see he’s also…he’s in…flying in first class, which makes sense.  We see he has a friend, Coach Beard.  He’s reading…he has a copy of Soccer for Dummies and Inverting the Pyramid.  Then we see…then we get, again, through the eyes of the…Ted’s audience, this kid.  Oi, mate.  Can we take an ussie?  Wicked.  Then we…then Beard bestows on us our first kinda setup, but also information.  Into touch means out of bounds.  I put a note to try to read Beard’s hat at some point, which I…I think it may be…there may be these references to Kansas City BBQ spots, but I’m not sure.  Then Ted Lasso; man, shout-out to On Summer’s Horseback, a episode of Sleep With Me in the 500s, I think, but we did re-release it not that long ago.  If you’re enjoying riding a horse, you’re doing it wrong.

 

First class…oh boy, this is gonna be tough.  C. Escalante…in, out drums.  Not from each other.  That’s ice plan?  10:08 PM.  Family pick.  Open song in sequence.  Oh, no, he says…so, this is a cute moment.  Again, you get…just through the dialogue and the performing, we see the depth of their friendship or their companionship.  Like, professional companionship, I don’t know.  They’re friends but they’re also coworkers.  If we see each other in our dreams, let’s pretend not to know each other.  Then I think that was a ref…I think ice plan is…now I can’t remember…Inception.  That’s just my spelling of Inception, ‘cause I said oh, it’s that reference to Inception, because if you really watch the show, there’s…I don’t know if there is a end to the pop culture and jokes within jokes within jokes.

 

I can’t find the bottom of them in a good way.  Okay, then after the opening sequence, we’re at the airport.  There’s some good dialogue about sleep.  Eat my Coke…that…my name’s Ted.  Eat my Coke?  I don’t know what that is.  Oh no, yeah; he ate Beard’s cookie and he said let’s not talk about that.  Then another learning from Lasso; he introduces himself in a very smooth way.  This is, again, this is something we could practice maybe on our Discord?  I don’t know if anybody wants to do a learning from Lasso.  It would have to be more community than me leading it, but I guess this is one thing we could do every day, is say my name’s Ted; what’s yours?  I mean, don’t say Ted unless your name’s Ted.  He’s Ollie, and they say can we take your bags?  They say we packed them, we’ll carry them.  Pit stop.

 

Their pit stop is at the Tower Bridge, not the London Bridge.  We get a joke about that.  Not in Kansas anymore.  They’re from Wichita State, so I thought that was a nice little double…it’s like oh, he’s from…I don’t know.  Ted says something like, I never said that when I wasn’t in Kansas.  I don’t know.  Then they’re driving to the…I don’t know what they call it; the pitch…I don’t know if they call it the stadium.  Ted says how’d they come up with soccer?  No hands.  Beard’s explaining it.  Then they pause in the stadium.  They have a view of the pitch.  She look…she loaf…I don’t know.  There’s a long look.  Well, we’ll talk about the next thing we’ll learn from Lasso and the Beard and Rebecca, actually.  Ted touches the grass.  Long look?  View of the pitch.  She look…I mean, that’s what it looks like it says.

 

Stop, get off…who are you?  Then he says I’m Coach Lasso.  Oh, okay.  Take all the grass you want.  What’s your name?  There’s a long pause, then…they don’t have any Nathans here.  Then Ted says I love this kid.  Nate runs from Rebecca.  Rebecca says Mrs. Welton’s my…Mrs. Welton’s my father.  Call me Rebecca.  Some more good dialogue ‘cause they talk about take…Higgins, take Beard to get the IDs and everything.  Ted says something about he needs a humidifier, something else, and the Wi-Fi password.  No Ted for Ted?  I don’t know what that says.  How do you take your tea?  I always thought tea was hot, brown water.  You’ll get used to it.  Or, get used to it, ‘cause Ted says it does.  That’s what it is.  Then there’s a great joke; oh, so how about a tour?  Oh, I’d like to see Abbey Road.  What does this say?  Holy cow.

 

Something…his trip?  Condo…con…long…modest…his trip?  Oh, okay.  Ted really cares.  How you holding up?  What does that say?  Abby Road, but she says it’s around here.  I mean, man, my…sometimes it’s just the way it is.  I know some people don’t like this, but it’s just my…even when I’m slowed down, my handwriting more reflects my…I don’t know.  It’s just…whatever.  How you holding up?  Then she surprises him with the press conference.  Locker room…silence…oh, there’s goats on the uniform, I think.  I wondered about that.  Fizzy water…green and red mics…Ted’s pretty honest.  Two halves…win or lose.  He makes a few mistakes.  We see…we start to get the pub crew cutaways, a little bit like a modern Waldorf and Statler.

 

I didn’t even think about that ‘til just now, but it’s really like a proxy, you know, and offers even more comedy.  Winks to Beard…into touch…so, we get the payoff of that.  Then again, another learning from Lasso; true…actually complimenting yourselves.  So, I put down three things; introduce yourself, one.  So, these are the three lessons we could learn from Lasso this episode; introduce yourself, compliment for real, ‘cause it does cause Trent Crimm some pause, but Trent still follows up.  Then three; pause.  These are powerful lessons.  We could take them from Lasso; we didn’t even need to learn them from Lasso, or project…you say Scoots, you’re projecting on Lasso.  I say okay, I’m projecting something useful, then, for once.  Okay, sequence of questions and mistakes…spits water.  He has a ringing noise…I’ve been there.

 

All sense of manner…salty…oh, Rebecca says where’s your sense of manners?  Salty…banneck, brunnick?  Have you all…are…here…here you all are.  Rebecca says let me remind you; this team’s been in profound mediocrity.  Then they kind of are aghast at her…again, her just being assertive with the truth.  She says, am I wrong?  Am I wrong?  Rebecca…oh yeah, so learning from Rebecca; assert and repeat if you need to, and pause.  Then she says Ted, I’m sorry…proving them wrong…no bubble water.  A gaffer from his pitch.  Then Higgins is excited about his choice.  He says, I like this Lasso guy.  The premise of Season 1 is revealed right then.  Rebecca reveals the season…and you say okay, this is again a…again, challenging as a creative constraint to take this type of conceit, and I don’t know if in some sense explored in a new way.

 

It’s like, people always say reinvent.  I say well, they’re exploring it and it is a creative constraint that’s the true challenge ‘cause you’re saying how am I gonna take this constraint and use it as a misdirect but still make it a fulfilling storyline?  I’ve talked about this in interviews before when I’ve talked about Ted Lasso before I was doing a podcast about it; it’s just like…or in personal conversations, it’s like the line they were…they’ve been able to go on, I don’t think it’s really…it’s unimaginably…amount of I think collaboration and effort to be able to go on that line successfully where it hasn’t become a…where it has depth and surface and you’re aware of both of those things, where it isn’t just a parody or the surface, you know?  I don’t know if you…yeah, I’m here to put you to sleep, though.

 

Then they talk about gif versus gif as Rebecca talks about the premise.  Thank you, Higgins.  Gaffer and his pitch…training makes perfect.  Again, then we get some exposition delivered in a wonderful way through Nate the great.  Kinda just saying well, there’s Roy Kent.  They talk about sports drinks.  I think Beard’s…says Casey signs original or something.  Nate’s imp…or Nate’s sports drink impresses the Beard.  Jamie Tartt, he’s like a kitty cat spooked by a cucumber or something.  Great at feathers…Sam…Sam Obisanya from Nigeria…wakes?  Oh no; Wales.  Somebody else from Wales.  I don’t know who that is.  But we meet the three main players on the team that are gonna be…you know, they’re introducing characters.  Oh, there’s…how many countries are in this country?  Four.  Oh, that’s a bit like America.

 

So, again, punchline within punchlines.  We go into the locker room; there’s kind of a reprise of the theme.  Axe Body Spray is Lynx Body Spray.  Favorite cat’s a lynx…a favorite of the great cats?  I don’t know what he says.  Roy stare-down…see the players’ numbers…disrespected Nate…all that jazz joke.  Knock, knock.  We meet Keeley.  She has on a CG belt buckle.  Jamie has an icon hat on.  Office rearrange.  Sing…fly…song…simplify…oh, so then there’s a sequence where they’re decorating the office.  Doctor inspection…word triangle.  I don’t think that’s what that says, but they put up all these inspirational decorating…inspirational…sports inspirations.  It kinda again thematically shows where they want to go, the Beard and Ted and their influences.  Beard, he does a alternating…light snaps in Ted’s ear.  Ted dozed off.

 

Ted does not react.  Oh, so then Roy comes in and Roy’s disrespectful.  But again, Ted pauses when agitated.  I can’t…I mean, I don’t even know if he gets…he must get agitated, but he’s great.  He says wait ‘til we win them over, then.  So, again…I think again this ability…and we…this is just an idealized version, but the ideal of…and I guess maybe Ted shows that he can’t just do this all the time, but to be able to have…to be so grounded in who you are or where you’re trying to go, or a sense of I’m okay, that he says yeah, just wait ‘til we win this guy over.  Ted does have this…he doesn’t have optimism, I don’t think.  He has hope, and there’s a big difference.  I don’t know, or maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about.

 

But I think in my opinion, just…this is just my opinion and just my opinion right now, which is…so, it’s just coming out, but it’s like…so, maybe I’m projecting on the optimism or redefining optimism, but kinda my thought about optimism versus hope in this situation, as I’m using them to describe Ted Lasso, would be that Ted is not optimistic in the sense that my defining optimism right now it like, everything’s gonna work out no matter what and it’s gonna be Grade A OK, where hope is okay, well, I’m gonna do my best and things are gonna turn out how they’re gonna turn out, and I’m gonna be…it’s gonna be okay, and I don’t have to worry, but I’ll still be…but it’s okay for me to be worried.  It’s like going with the stream where maybe optimism is like oh, I’m gonna launch into the jet stream.  I don’t know.

 

He borrows some tape, puts up…which Beard has handy…puts up the believe sign.  I liked when he jumped down.  After putting the sign up, he combs his hair, covers up Keeley.  Jamie’s Number 9.  Keeley comes; she helps him.  Pal off…old school beatbox.  So, they do a pow…old school high-five.  Ted does a beat box.  She says bros…motive?  Oh, Biz Markie, but he…she says I never know how to react when a grown man beatboxes in front of me, which is funny; that’s happened once.  Keeley gives him what I would say is…is that a royal bow or a ballet bow or a stage bow?  Nate’s car load…there’s lots of comedy in this with…in the background.  Higgins and Rebecca…Beard is fun.  Nice man.  So, Higgins is untroubled because Ted is such a nice man.  Primitive, invisible steaming wheel.

 

Oh…I don’t know what the next thing is, but they’re in Nate’s car.  Ted makes…he’s so joyous.  Check out this invisible…or enthusiastic, so you gotta watch this sequence.  The invisible steering wheel, Beard in the back with a suitcase.  I accept…oh yeah, so she says I’m gonna give you a promotion, Higgins, to deal with it.  But then they get her again…Rebecca I guess asserts true boundaries.  She tells him the truth and puts it in perspective.  She goes, what about your past behavior, Higgins?  So, don’t start acting like you have this compass.  Higgins doesn’t feel good.  Beard…a coach…Beard as coach??  Double question mark.  Hands him…then we see a Welcome Lasso basket, which we’ll talk about more when we do the visual run-through.

 

Piano music…finger time check…oh yeah, Ted tries to figure out what time it is back home.  He puts on his PJs, he calls the family.  His shirt, I think it says George Arthur’s something’s Shack or Slack.  He’s got a humidifier on the table, at least one.  They’re saying family need for space.  I love you.  Then Ted says no, that’s okay.  You don’t…we don’t know the conversation.  He goes on bed, he lays down on his bed on his back, he turns the lights out, and he says shoot, I can’t sleep, which is relatable to all of us.  Then they play out the credits with some Biz Markie.  Okay, so that’s our first run-through, everybody.

 

Alright everybody, Scoots here, and we’re just gonna do another non-note run-through of Ted Lasso.  Just downloading it, Season 1 pilot.  I guess this is the middle of the episode, so I’ll announce it somewhere else.  We’ll do…there’s so many good things to look up.  Maybe we’ll just do a couple fact episodes to fill out this season?  I don’t know.  I don’t know if we’ll do those in-between or what, ‘cause I don’t want to miss all the great extras.  So, we got our thing…I gotta turn on, hopefully, closed captioning.  Okay, so we’re watching here.  They’re playing soccer, music’s playing.  Goal…I think that’s Jamie Tartt.  Got a rainbow.  I think that’s called when you rainbow it over somebody’s head.  What do you call it when you kick it through their legs?  That’s called a…no, I don’t know what it’s called.  It has a thing.

 

Then we have Rebecca’s face.  We realize she’s staring at the painting, not out the window.  The office is being cleared out.  She takes a deep breath, points at the painting.  Higgins…Higgins happens to point out oh boy, that’s worth a million pounds.  Well, you should have taken it then, Higgins.  Come on.  He winces.  Then we see the…Rebecca Welton.  Come on, Higgins.  This is when what’s-his-name comes in.  Some nice paintings in the office.  There’s some flowers.  I’m assuming the new paintings…oh, there’s a butterfly thing.  I’m assuming some of the paintings…the newer paintings, ‘cause they kinda thematically…I don’t know.  We’ll see, I guess, later in the season, if those are Rebecca’s or not.  We see the short-shorts on George and tea on Rebecca’s desk.

 

She’s…in a clear teacup, so we can see that it’s tea.  Also, you know, the amber color of tea is always nice to look at.  She kinda puts this guy in his place and says you know, you’ve really been remarkably average, and you wear short-shorts and you’re rude.  Casual misogyny.  Liam and Noel; not an oasis.  So, by the way, head out on the road, bro.  Keep…take your raisins with you.  He is not a nice guy.  So again, she has to assert herself and say by the way, we’ve let you go.  Good day.  Then Higgins says what do you want me to do about a new manager?  Should I prepare a list of candidates?  Rebecca, in a slow zoom, says no, not necessary.  That’s when we go to SVP, Scotty Van Pelt, his sports center.  AFC Richmond…Theodore…Ted Lasso.

 

Ted’s eyebrows are very up, Joker-esque, actually, in his sports center photo with his Wichita sweater on.  Shockers…they won this division two football championship in his first season, but it was Ted’s dancing that gave us pure…you know, pure joy.  No adulteration.  Oh, we see the Beard’s in the background dancing, too.  He’s got a yellow hat on.  First time I noticed that.  Good luck with the most beautiful game.  Then we go to the lavatory.  Ted comes out of the airplane lavatory, grabs his Kerouac, sits down.  He’s on Chapter 14, just in case you’re wondering.  Then this kid is like, let’s take an ussie.  They take a picture…wide.  He goes oh, a selfie, but he goes, it’s not myself; it’s us.  Ussie; I like that.  Wicked.  Kid snaps.  You coaching football?  I can’t believe it.  He says it’s not a good idea, though.

 

Ted says, I’ve heard that…I…he said, heard that tune before, but I’m still dancing.  Plus, this kid’s in first class.  Then he…Beard’s sitting behind him; they’re not sitting together.  He goes, tell me about into touch.  That’s when they do that.  Okay, oh, he says you’re gonna have to give me five bucks if I use it in a sentence later.  They do some sort of pinky shake.  Or, not pinky shake; two-thing shake.  Get some sleep, Ted.  Ted says, is this a good idea, what we’re doing?  He goes, it’s wild.  It’s a challenge, yeah.  Ted says you gotta be uncomfortable, which is another lesson from Lasso that I didn’t write down.  If it’s uncomfortable, it means you’re doing it right.  I mean, if it’s outside your comfort zone.  Then they talk about the dreams.  You got it, stranger.  The Beard puts on a sleep mask, but Ted looks at his phone.

 

Not a good idea, Ted.  That’s blue light.  We hear some snoring and theme music plays.  We also see the stadium is changing colors, so it is…and you see names of the characters and stuff, but you see that the stadium’s being reborn as it becomes Ted Lasso, from blue to red.  We see a wide shot, then we…airport.  Don’t know which airport it is.  Ted didn’t sleep on the plane; he was thinking about not sleeping, then I was thinking about not, not sleeping, and that’s never a good thing, you know?  Then he said I ate some cookies, including yours.  We’re not gonna talk about it.  It’s not…there’s our ride.  My name’s Ted.  Ollie…I think it is…Casey signs original, is the Beard’s hat.  Ted’s try…Ted’s hair’s out of whack.  They both have backpacks on, different style backpacks.  Ted has a sweater and a Oxford shirt on.

 

Beard has a polo and a sweatshirt, I think kinda like a sports-type material sweatshirt though, not cotton.  Smart move.  Then we go to the AFC Richmond Stadium.  It’s a overcast day.  They do have…they have a ride to the stadium; they just don’t have a ride home.  They’re walking through.  Ted goes out to look at the pitch.  We get a zoom up behind him with the Beard.  Perfect day to look at the pitch; it’s misty out there.  Oh, they share a look.  That’s what my notes said that I couldn’t read.  They look at each other.  Ted nods.  Then he feels the grass.  Feels different.  I mean the same, but different.  Metaphor?  You know it, baby.  That’s when Nate the great comes out; says stop touching the grass.  He goes, Ted Lasso, Coach Beard.  Oh, new manager.  Sorry.  Take all the grass you want.

 

I could go through the garbage and get you more; we just cut it.  They have a little back-and-forth but he goes yeah, you really gotta get off the grass, though.  No kidding.  Then they go okay, we’re gonna meet Rebecca Welton?  That’s where I’m taking you.  What’s your name?  Nate…who, me?  No one asks my name.  Ted says…oh, this is the first good pause.  He pauses even longer when Nate doesn’t answer.  He goes, I’m ready when you are.  Oh, Nathan.  Nathan; love that name.  Love your hot-dogs.  Nate doesn’t understand.  He laughs anyway.  You see Ted’s dimples, actually, when he…like, when he’s talking, smiling.  Hands in his pockets.  Nate can’t say hello to Rebecca and Higgins, so he backs out, runs down the stairs.  She’s slowly stocking her office now, so actually I’ll check the wall behind her now.

 

No, so it is the same paintings as earlier.  Miss Welton’s my father.  That’s a great joke.  Oh, she has a coat rack that looks like a tree.  I like that.  This is Higgins, current director of communications.  He says oop, oh no, current?  Okay, get the IDs, any other information.  Let’s see what Ted says here.  Wi-Fi password, wet wipes, and humidifier is what Ted needs.  They sit down, something to drink…Ted wants coffee.  She says, how’s tea?  How about…how do you take your tea?  We see the…over his shoulder is the football stadium, so either they filmed this on-location or they just did a great job.  I don’t…it looks real to me.  When in Rome…doesn’t like tea.  That was the…you gotta have preferences and be honest about them, so it’s good that Ted’s clear, really clear about his feelings about tea.

 

He doesn’t try to do stuff so people like him.  They say okay, let’s go around the club.  The hall of the club’s long.  I’ll be at modest history, 1897, first match during the WWs.  They did their parts.  Some locals claim there’s still Caspers running around here.  She said oh, do you believe in those?  He goes well, Caspers?  Ted goes, you have to teach them to believe in themselves.  Then there’s a bottle of champagne and the owner who’s Rebecca’s ex, who we’ll meet later again, unfortunately, multiple times.  That’s when Ted says how are you doing, honestly?  She says well, it hasn’t been easy.  Then that’s when they do the press surprise and Ted goes yeah, sure, after I get a couple night’s sleep.  She goes no, no, right now, which is not really fair, but then they say new manager of AFC Richmond, Ted Lasso.  There’s applause.

 

There’s Ted looking a little overwhelmed, you know?  He combs his hair, says okay.  Then the team’s watching him, so we get a couple glimpses of some of the teammates; Sam, Roy, and Jamie, mostly.  Roy’s like, I want to listen to this.  Ted has bubbly water, people laugh at him.  He didn’t expect it to be fizzy.  Pubs…we get the guys at the pub.  They got a lot of questions.  Ted says actually, okay, hold on, hold on.  He’s being assertive too, actually, at first.  He sees Beard, so he’s getting ready to win his five dollars.  He says yeah, I really know nothing about football, soccer, so…he goes, but this is like every team; you gotta figure out…the team’s gonna give you the…all they have.  Then he starts making his mistakes, but it kinda falls into his philosophy.  We watch the Beard reacting, we watch the team reacting.

 

He’s still trying to make the best of it.  He says don’t worry, my door’s always open.  You can ask me anything.  No topic will be into touch.  This is where he calls on Trent Crimm; I like your glasses.  Thank you.  I like his jacket, too, by the way, Trent.  Very…actually, great layering.  Holy moly, he’s got three layers at least.  He’s got a jacket, a collared shirt that’s open, and a t-shirt, and it fits his style.  Trent says what are you…what is this?  Is this a joke, this whole thing?  Sam and Roy are not…they go, do you even know any…who any footballers are?  Then it starts to go downhill from here.  This is when Ted kinda…I don’t know.  You just kinda get all the pressure he’s gonna be under, right?  He’s a fish out of…this is a fish out of water scene, I guess, where you see, yeah, not everybody’s gonna be super helpful to the fish out of water, maybe.

 

Ted takes a drink; more water.  Spits more water out.  Rebecca says okay, that’s enough.  Gotta forgive everybody.  We usually have manners and hospitality.  Aren’t you a salty bunch?  But the press room’s full; never was before, so maybe it’s not a bad idea.  So, she says yeah, I’ve seen Richmond play a lot all these years under the previous owner.  Profound mediocrity.  She says, am I wrong?  Am I wrong?  That quiets somebody down.  They say no, you’re not wrong.  So, maybe Coach Lasso doesn’t have a CV, but he has one thing they don’t; a trophy from this millennium.  So, we’re changing things up, like it or not, Lasso.  Higgins is inspired for a moment.  See you later, she says.  Ted says nice meeting y’all.  Sorry I spit on you.  Bye.  Everybody’s a little stunned.  Ted’s a little…oh boy, sorry about that.

 

She says don’t worry about it, Ted.  You have to prove them wrong.  They give him a regular water which is fine, it’s still water.  Ted says okay, I want to say hi to the team.  Can’t keep the gaffer from the pitch, eh?  Can say that again.  He does a note.  0 for 2, he says.  This is when Higgins says I love this guy, Ted Lasso.  He’s just what I need.  Rebecca says yeah, right.  This is a setup for a setback.  My husband loved this club, and Ted Lasso’s gonna help me show him…show Rupert that…who’s boss.  Like a gif or a gif, and you’re gonna help me, Higgins.  She goes off.  Higgins is having second thoughts and a tummy ache.  Gaffer is going out to the pitch to watch practice, but practice is called training.  Gonna be…the vernacular they even use.  Training makes perfect.  There you go.  They see Nate again.

 

Nate brings them a sample of a sports drink, Roy Kent is in a bad mood…classic old school mid-fielder, legend.  Won a Champions League with Chelsea eight years ago.  Ted says, this is…I like this mix, young fella.  Even Coach Beard likes him.  I mean, Coach Beard doesn’t say anything; he just nods and holds it up with respect.  Praise does not come lightly, Nathan.  You remembered my name.  Jamie does that…whatever that kick’s called; reverse flip kick.  I don’t know.  Top scorer on the team.  He’s great at soccer…football, but other than that…they say okay, then we see Sam.  He’s having a tough time.  Then that’s when the coach realizes that people are from around the world, including Wales.  How many countries are in this country?  Four.  They both say it.  Then they follow Nate into the locker room.

 

That’s where we get a nice…like, not ominous; the ops…inspirational moment.  He loves the locker room, loves the smell.  Smells like potential and Axe Body Spray.  Notes of Axe Body Spray.  McCracken; 28, Garen…something 31.  AFC Richmond is a goat.  Rosenfeldt some…number…I don’t know.  Bumberbatch…just checking some of the names.  The team comes in, they look at Ted.  This is a testing moment.  Roy really glares…slow-walks him.  They make a joke about…Jaws, all that jazz.  Howdy, fellas.  My name’s Coach Lasso.  This is Beard.  Firmus victorious, or something.  They happen to have a saying.  This is when we meet Keeley.  Still trying to check out some of the numbers.  They’re all out of focus right now.  Team…all the other actors are having to act in the background while…so, that’s tough for them.

 

Jamie’s got quite the garb on.  Cross-body bag…styling…and not a polite person.  Doesn’t treat Keeley with respect.  Keeley doesn’t seem to…she seems to have…Bumberbatch; 21.  That was Bumberbatch for sure.  Anywho, thanks for your time.  Firmus Victoria.  Then we do the office sequence and you got the desk moving, posters getting put up, book bags, card from Ted’s kid.  Good luck, daddy.  Ollie…USA hockey…Coach V…Sugar Ray, and Wooden’s Pyramid, I think.  Then he wakes Ted up.  Not Sugar Ray the band; Sugar Ray Leonard, I think, was the last poster.  They say hey, Roy, that was fun.  He says great, I’m working for Ronald McDonald.  Terrific.

 

That was like somebody said to me; I said…very similar reaction; they said something and then they said this is what my career’s come to, interviewing a guy that puts…they said it off the air, but they said this is it, interviewing a guy that puts people to sleep on a podcast.  They said yeah, this is…that was where it’s come…they said isn’t it nice we’re here together?  Ted jumps down, fixes his hair, his believe poster’s off; that’s when he covers up Keeley, but…I don’t know, that was the only…I mean, I guess it was a choice of respect and not moralism, and to show actually maybe foreshadowing of him and Keeley’s relationship.  But I think this whole thing is about believing.  We are Richmond, hashtag…grotta garderus something.  But she says…she has a great joke; I believe it’s crooked.

 

She says, I’m here to get…grab Jamie’s phone.  He’s getting waxed.  She grabs it, she sees Ted’s respect, so she’s kind of…takes pause.  She helps him with the sign.  How about that?  Nice teamwork.  High five.  Power…old school…I’m Keeley.  Oh, I’m Ted Lasso.  Oh, you’re trending hard on Twitter.  Do you even tweet?  No, but I do beatbox, and he beatboxes pretty decently.  But she doesn’t…she’s like, I don’t know how to react when a grown man beatboxes in front of me.  He…Biz Markie…and she goes, don’t search on Twitter, because there’s a lot about you.  He says, I’ll take my word for it.  She says welcome to England.  Heads out.  Ted goes into his office.  Believe…we get a shot of believe, then we get the car sequence, which is great.  Yeah, we see Nate’s humble car size versus Rebecca Higgins.

 

So, their cars even tell a story about the characters, which is nice.  Some physical comedy, Rebecca kinda saying…Higgins trying to be the conscience and Rebecca saying you don’t have a conscience, dude.  Your behavior in the past has shown that you’re an enabler, so you’re gonna be enabling my plans now.  I’ll give you a promotion with a raise, so suck it up.  Then we see Ted doing the invisible steering wheel, Beard holding the bag with…steaming the window up, even.  You’re a godsend, Ted Lasso.  Takes one to know one.  He’s still got his energy.  She says okay, and Higgins, you gonna work with me?  He goes, I accept.  She’s got a automatic door on her car.  Oh, she…then now is when she reminds him that he’s an enabler of bad behavior.  She drives off.

 

Higgins groans, goes to his car, which is a powder…or sky blue, baby blue Volvo.  Beard drops Ted off at his apartment.  He gives him something…oh, wet wipes, maybe.  I don’t…that must be what it is, one Wet One.  Couldn’t quite see.  Oh, let’s see everything that’s in Ted’s thing.  Oh boy, I gotta rewind.  Hold on.  Ted goes in his room; he’s got a gift basket from I don’t know whom.  It’s a pretty nice one.  There’s bubbly water, there’s the humidifier.  Walker Highland cow shortbread, the ultimate Cockney’s geezer’s something.  Ultimate guide.  Marmite, DC tips, Hobnobs; those are…I’ve got Hobnobs.  The Hobnobs are good.  Hulp…I don’t know what those are.  That’s what Ted ends up eating.  I think those are like corn chips.  A bobble-head of the Queen, it looks like a pillow, and a couple other things you can’t quite make out.

 

It sounds like Ted’s eating those, which seems like nuts or corn chip…corn…whatever those things are called, Corn Nuts.  Checks his phone, tries to figure out the time, gets out…he packs his stuff away or maybe takes out his PJs, takes a shower, and then calls home and says that’s…oh yeah, so we can see the humidifier and the wet wipes; two packs, it looks like, or baby wipes.  Ted’s still wearing his wedding ring.  He says jeez, kid, I just want…he calls his kid first.  Just wanted to hear your voice.  Thanks, big guy.  Miss you.  Then he talks to his mom.  Love you, too.  I mean, he says that to his son.  You got a beautiful shot of his apartment, or the set that’s his apartment, and a lot of windows in the living room, a lot of natural light, which is one of my big things of importance.  We kinda get some more emotional part…you say okay, this person is going through something, but he’s still trying to stay positive, but…in the face of not everything going his way.

 

Joe Arthur is his t-shirt, like I said earlier.  Trying to give you space.  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Okay, he says.  No, that’s okay.  Yeah, yeah.  Hey Michelle, hey, hey.  Michelle, I love you.  We see him pause again.  No, that’s okay.  Really?  Yeah.  He says okay, I’ll talk to you, and hangs up.  Looks around, takes a breath, and he’s lying on his back in bed.  Turns out his light.  He’s thinking clearly.  Uncomfortable…shoot, now I can’t sleep.  The episode ends.  So, and that’ll end this week’s coverage of Learning from Lasso, and we’ll be back next week I think with Episode 2, and then we’ll see what we do with all the stuff we could look up about the episodes, ‘cause there’s so much.  Biz Mark…just starting with Biz Markie that closes the episode, so goodnight.  Hopefully Ted’s resting and you’re resting, too.  Goodnight.

 

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcribed by Leah Hervoly)