Bedtime stories to help grown ups fall asleep in the deep, dark night.

Multiplex

 

Stay in your lane

https://www.merriam-webster.com/wordplay/stay-in-your-lane-origin-phrase-history

https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/stay-in-your-lane/

https://www.englandlogistics.com/stay-in-your-lane/

 

College Industrial Complex

https://magazine.scienceforthepeople.org/labor-special-issue/organizing-from-the-belly-of-the-academic-industrial-complex/

https://www.aei.org/articles/busting-college-industrial-complex/

https://educationalrenaissance.com/2023/08/19/the-state-of-affairs-higher-education-as-an-educational-industrial-complex/

 

Nihilism

https://www.learnreligions.com/what-is-nihilism-history-250581

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0191453720975454

https://marmysz.wordpress.com/2023/08/19/a-history-of-nihilism-in-the-nineteeth-century/

 

Technology rising up in film

https://www.dazeddigital.com/artsandculture/article/34296/1/five-times-films-made-us-fear-technology

http://www.tasteofcinema.com/2019/the-10-best-movies-that-explore-technophobia/

https://lwlies.com/articles/hollywood-artificial-intelligence/

 

DOWN TO BUSINESS

A trip down Memory Lane for some people

I don’t have a lane in my mind, personally

Stay In Your Lane

That’s a very dude-centric saying

Calculation Lane

Recall Lane

Memory Lane? I don’t know

This brochure was not representative of the real Memory Lane experience!

 

Deep Dark Night United

n/a

 

PLUGS

Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Rusty Biscuit Links; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline

 

SPONSORS

Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Lumen; Carvana

 

INTRO

Memory Lane thoughts or other ones

Maybe you work a different schedule

You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread

I’m here to talk, talk, talk you off to dreamland

A whole field of feelings in there

Someone out there really does know how you feel

And they are deeply glad you’re here

Making kindness in the night

A magic beyond my understanding

I’m gonna forget one lane I’m in

Overthinking to stay in my lane

Becoming so aware of the lane

I just can’t stay in this straight lane!

People’s reactions to me not staying in my lane says a lot about them

Sensing the Lane

A metaphor about a metaphor

If you make me aware that I have to relax during a massage, I’ll never relax

The lane in my subconscious

From rebellion to desire

Now I desire to stay in the lane

Holy cow that was a big tangent

A lot of people have had students like me

I get a lot of unsolicited emails from gurus who sense I need help

I have a motherlode of strangeness within me

This show is meant to keep you company

 

STORY

Welcome to Multiplex

Helping workers and guests of the mall

You can listen in any order

I can almost guarantee you won’t remember much

I’ve got your needs in mind

Antonio’s intro

I think he’s in a parade?

He’s so gracious he’s comfortable taking compliments

Is the full name Puss or Puss in Boots or Puss N Boots?

Wyatt fills us in

The style of tale has not been previously told

The heroine’s journey?

Hero / Harrow

The Ordinary Journey

Just another person on a journey to being ordinary

Boyd brought us to the mall

We were on a path to greatness aka Ivy League college

I’m gonna take this boat to the sun!

Greatness was our True North

A different flavor of greatness

We weren’t delusional but we knew we were headed to greatness

An adventure so great that it deterred us from the path towards greatness

I guess I’m telling the story because it’s hard to explain

A public access TV show in the greater Walnut Grove area

Every once in a while, someone would recognize me, but that was rare

People were intrigued by the ‘makeups’ and ‘costumes’ of my interviewees

Surprise, it was all real!

I threw away my school opportunity because of some personal stuff

I was caught in a sort of loop

I thought I could get back to the halls of ivy through my willpower alone

We started off playing mini golf

I pause to think on my sister

Learning to pause and be present was important for me

The Bubbler with Julius J Juice

Who would’ve known it was made from concentrate?

Our get rich quick scheme for this concentrate

Robbing the gray area

This could be my way out!

We got stuck in the mall and had to help these characters

We mistook these beings for immersive theater performers at first

We had to help Mommy and other people

These beings were becoming cereal mascots

Then we met Crispy Commander Crunch

A real sentient being, sleeping in a grandfather clock

Then we met the Count du Chocolate

No one liked the count du chocolate, understandably

Then we met the Person Who Couldn’t Be Seen

We didn’t really want to help him

Beyond Nihilism

We learned that CCC was actually quite childish

He fell in love with a grad school actress from a commercial

He didn’t know what acting was

Very Juvenile Thinking

We had a new mission: Double Cross Crispy Commander and save this actress

We successfully chased her away

I revealed my theft to my friends to upset them so they’d be mean to her

Ok, let me summarize before we move on

This is a product of the Transverse Plane

People cross over because they need something or are needed

Why were there workers? Where were they from? I don’t know

But the movies never ended well for these characters

Escaping our world to go to the cereal world

It’s like a mirror that’s also a window

So it was real but also seemed unreal

CCC was also in need

Were they needed or needy?

My friends were also unhappy with me

My friends will leave, I’ll stay to make a distraction with the person who can’t be seen

We probably need adults to resolve this

CCC was already fuming

CCC started a movie called Chopping Town Mall

Safety bots are now everywhere

The bots are rising up

Pretend that the actress has returned to the mall

Then CCC will stop the bot movie and they’ll go away

Invisible Person has changed and wants to help

Now we have to figure out our nex step

Hopefully my friends can forgive me

I guess I filled you in for the whole time I’m supposed to talk

We’ll continue talking later

Inspiration to be plain

 

SWM+ THANKS

n/a

 

SUMMARY:

Episode: 1294

Title: The Ordinary Journey | Multiplex Ep15

Deep Dark Night United: n/a

Plugs: Sleep With Me Plus; SleepPhones; Rusty Biscuit Links; Emily Tat Artwork; NAPAWF; Anti-Racism Resources; Ukraine Relief; Crisis Textline

Sponsors: Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Lumen; Carvana

SWM+ Thanks: n/a

Notable Language:

• Stay In Your Lane
• Recall Lane
• Talk, Talk, Talk you off to dreamland
• A whole field of feelings
• Sensing the Lane
• Lane
• A motherlode of strangeness within me
• Hero / Harrow
• The Ordinary Journey
• Greatness
• Walnut Grove
• Very Juvenile Thinking
• Inspiration to be plain

 

Notable Culture:

• The Matrix

• Multiplex

• Puss in Boots

• Antonio Banderas
• Julius J Juice
• Chopping Town Mall

 

Notable Talking Points:

• Memory Lane thoughts or other ones
• Maybe you work a different schedule
• You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread
• I’m here to talk, talk, talk you off to dreamland
• A whole field of feelings in there
• Someone out there really does know how you feel
• And they are deeply glad you’re here
• Making kindness in the night
• A magic beyond my understanding
• I’m gonna forget one lane I’m in
• Overthinking to stay in my lane
• Becoming so aware of the lane
• I just can’t stay in this straight lane!
• People’s reactions to me not staying in my lane says a lot about them
• Sensing the Lane
• A metaphor about a metaphor
• If you make me aware that I have to relax during a massage, I’ll never relax
• The lane in my subconscious
• From rebellion to desire
• Now I desire to stay in the lane
• Holy cow that was a big tangent
• A lot of people have had students like me
• I get a lot of unsolicited emails from gurus who sense I need help
• I have a motherlode of strangeness within me
• This show is meant to keep you company
• Welcome to Multiplex
• Helping workers and guests of the mall
• You can listen in any order
• I can almost guarantee you won’t remember much
• I’ve got your needs in mind
• Antonio’s intro
• I think he’s in a parade?
• He’s so gracious he’s comfortable taking compliments
• Is the full name Puss or Puss in Boots or Puss N Boots?
• Wyatt fills us in
• The style of tale has not been previously told
• The heroine’s journey?
• Hero / Harrow
• The Ordinary Journey
• Just another person on a journey to being ordinary
• Boyd brought us to the mall
• We were on a path to greatness aka Ivy League college
• I’m gonna take this boat to the sun!
• Greatness was our True North
• A different flavor of greatness
• We weren’t delusional but we knew we were headed to greatness
• An adventure so great that it deterred us from the path towards greatness
• I guess I’m telling the story because it’s hard to explain
• A public access TV show in the greater Walnut Grove area
• Every once in a while, someone would recognize me, but that was rare
• People were intrigued by the ‘makeups’ and ‘costumes’ of my interviewees
• Surprise, it was all real!
• I threw away my school opportunity because of some personal stuff
• I was caught in a sort of loop
• I thought I could get back to the halls of ivy through my willpower alone
• We started off playing mini golf
• I pause to think on my sister
• Learning to pause and be present was important for me
• The Bubbler with Julius J Juice
• Who would’ve known it was made from concentrate?
• Our get rich quick scheme for this concentrate
• Robbing the gray area
• This could be my way out!
• We got stuck in the mall and had to help these characters
• We mistook these beings for immersive theater performers at first
• We had to help Mommy and other people
• These beings were becoming cereal mascots
• Then we met Crispy Commander Crunch
• A real sentient being, sleeping in a grandfather clock
• Then we met the Count du Chocolate
• No one liked the count du chocolate, understandably
• Then we met the Person Who Couldn’t Be Seen
• We didn’t really want to help him
• Beyond Nihilism
• We learned that CCC was actually quite childish
• He fell in love with a grad school actress from a commercial
• He didn’t know what acting was
• Very Juvenile Thinking
• We had a new mission: Double Cross Crispy Commander and save this actress
• We successfully chased her away
• I revealed my theft to my friends to upset them so they’d be mean to her
• Ok, let me summarize before we move on
• This is a product of the Transverse Plane
• People cross over because they need something or are needed
• Why were there workers? Where were they from? I don’t know
• But the movies never ended well for these characters
• Escaping our world to go to the cereal world
• It’s like a mirror that’s also a window
• So it was real but also seemed unreal
• CCC was also in need
• Were they needed or needy?
• My friends were also unhappy with me
• My friends will leave, I’ll stay to make a distraction with the person who can’t be seen
• We probably need adults to resolve this
• CCC was already fuming
• CCC started a movie called Chopping Town Mall
• Safety bots are now everywhere
• The bots are rising up
• Pretend that the actress has returned to the mall
• Then CCC will stop the bot movie and they’ll go away
• Invisible Person has changed and wants to help
• Now we have to figure out our nex step
• Hopefully my friends can forgive me
• I guess I filled you in for the whole time I’m supposed to talk
• We’ll continue talking later
• Inspiration to be plain

Episode 1294 – The Ordinary Journey | Multiplex Episode 15

 

[START OF RECORDING]

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster who’s here to take you on a trip to a shopping mall, a trip down Memory Lane for some people, though this episode will be a character going down Memory Lane. How come it’s called…? In my case, there’s no lanes in my memory, 'cause I picture a lane as very straight, without meanders, especially…if someone was to say, stay in your lane, I’d say, well, which ones…? I don't even know where my lane…stay in my lane? Is my…?

 

And I would feel an internal resistance, and then I would be like, oh yeah, don't worry, I’m gonna…if I was a kid and the teacher said that, I’d be like, oh, totally I’m gonna stay in my lane, and I would purposely…honest; just kinda the person I am. I’d find the line they were refer…once they pointed out my lane…I mean, I’ve gotten this as a e-mail before; I just never thought about it, but I also…I never had a teacher say stay in my lane, 'cause that was kind of a new thing, and usually dudes use it anyway to other people. But I’d be like…I’d purposely step on the line and over the line. But in this case and within my mind, there is no…my lanes are not…you say, your lanes are not lane-like…you’re not very lane-like. I’d say, correct about that.

 

I don't even know what got me started. Oh, Memory Lane. Particularly when it comes to memory…I mean, I guess someone that can recall…what was June 25, 1981? What was the day? And they say the day of the week or whatever. I guess that’s not memory, either. That’s like a…that’s like Calculation Lane. I could see that, or Recall Lane. I can see that. Memory Lane? I don't know. I don't know if there’s fans of it. Strolling…I guess I can see strolling down Memory Lane. I guess when you’re presenting it in that way, it’s more of an idyllic presentation, like a sales brochure. Like, later, don’t you want to be strolling down Memory Lane? Oh boy, that’s gonna be good.

 

But then you’re like…at bedtime…that’s — by the way — why I make this show, because that’s kinda what…welcome to Sleep With Me, by the way, a podcast that’s here to keep you company while you fall asleep. What happens for me at bedtime is exactly that. I say, hey…I get the brochure during the day and then I say, oh boy, I’d love to stroll down Memory Lane. Some part of me is like, don't worry, later at bed…it’ll set everything up perfect for bedtime. We’ll stroll down Memory Lane together. It’s a straight lane full of smiles and shops and pastels. Great stuff. Then at bedtime, it does not…let’s just say it does…the brochure was not representative of the experience, right? Fortunately, Sleep With Me doesn't have a brochure because it’s hard to represent what’s coming.

 

This is a podcast, if you’re new, to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep, to be your friend in the deep, dark night as you drift off, and not to put you to sleep but to kinda set the mood so you could fall asleep. It does take some getting used to. What we got coming up is support so paying for the show is optional, then a long, meandering intro meant to ease you into bedtime, and then a bedtime story about friends in a shopping mall together, solving problems or working out stuff together. It’s all friendly, goofy, silly. I mean, clearly…full of meanders. So, I’m glad you’re here. Regular listeners, what up? Good to see you all, particularly you. Yeah, I’m glad you’re here. So, yeah, that’s what the show is. I’m really glad you’re here.

 

This show is really and truly made possible by the people that — either before they go to sleep or tomorrow take action — support the show directly on Sleep With Me+ or on Apple Podcasts or support one of our sponsors. That’s it. Those are the ways we bring the show. The show does not have any outside funding or anything like that. It’s just listeners taking action so this could be here for everybody, and paying for it is optional because of that people…because of those people; not that people. I’m really thankful for that 'cause I love making the show and being here for you on a regular basis. So, thank you so much, and here’s a couple ways you…if you do so choose, you could support the show so it can be here for you and everyone else on a regular basis.

 

INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake, whether it’s thoughts, Memory Lane thoughts or other ones, thoughts about the past, the present, the future.

 

So, thoughts, it could be feelings, anything coming up for you emotionally or feelings that are just there, physical sensations, changes in time, temperature, routine, work schedule, maybe you work a different schedule, maybe you’re anticipating something or you’re going through something, you’re going somewhere or you have guests. Maybe you’re a regular listener or maybe you just like a temp…you say, well, I just gotta get through this next thing and I need something to keep me company and help me fall asleep. Whatever brings you here and whether this podcast works for you or not, I hope you feel welcome at least in the sense that I really am glad you’re here. I’ll explain.

 

If you don’t like me already, I have a website…well, I’ll just tell you; sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou, and that’ll take you to other sleep podcasts and sleepy stuff. ‘Cause the key of the show is that you deserve a good night's sleep. You deserve a bedtime you don’t have to dread. You deserve a bedtime you could feel neutral about or look forward to, a bedtime where you get the rest you need so your life tomorrow is more manageable. Ideally you get the rest you need on a regular basis, 'cause you deserve it. You deserve to be out there rested and living your life. Myself and all the people listening right now across the world, we share something in the deep, dark night. Kinda hard to put into words, but I always try because I’m here to talk, talk, talk you off to dreamland.

 

But it’s also important for me to try to touch on what it is that we share, which is a sense that…well, just that for some reason — and each person might be a little bit different — sleep does not come easy to us always. Maybe it’s just a temporary thing or maybe it’s something you deal with on a regular basis. I can relate to how that…I mean, I know how it feels for me, and there’s a lot of different…there’s a whole field of feelings in there, and sometimes it’s related to different stuff. So, I can probably relate to how it feels for you, but maybe you say, no, you can't. I’m going through this very specific thing with very specific feelings. I say, yeah, well, that’s…I’m still glad you’re here.

 

Even if I can't relate to it, what we do share is there’s enough people listening…one, that even if they can't relate to exactly what you’re dealing with, they do care because they have their own thing or their own experience with nighttime and sleep. So, they do care if you have your thing, too. But there are enough people listening that there is someone out there who knows how you feel, and that might be a little bit beyond belief, but it is true. Not only that; that person is sitting up in bed right now or perking up and holding a space for you here, and they are deeply glad you’re here because they know…maybe not…yeah, well, I’ll just use it metaphorically; they know exactly how you feel.

 

That’s why they’re so glad you’re here, and they really hope this podcast can help you out and that it can help you out where one day you could hold that space for somebody else. That’s kinda what we share, is this…and it’s happening behind the scenes. You don’t even have to really do anything to have this kind intention or whatever, because it comes from a place of…that doesn't feel kind, right? The night and sleep…I don't know, it is kind of a magic that’s beyond my understanding, but I like to talk about it because that’s why I’m glad you’re here, genuinely. The way the show works is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones — oh, so creaky are my dulcet tones — pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents.

 

So, that means my voice is not traditionally considered soothing and…or it’s not intentionally designed to be soothing. I mean, I could try to do that, but it’s…yeah, and it’s not…I don't know, it is…there is an intention behind how I speak on the show, but it’s…I don't know. I don't know if you know what I mean, 'cause I can't even explain that, either. My intention is just to be here in the moment with you. That’s what drives my voice, is that I’m just trying to be here and keep you company, and the pointless meanders and the superfluous tangents are a part of that, too. I go off topic, I get mixed up, repeat a lot of stuff, double back, get lost, go in my lane, forget what my lane is, don’t stay in my lane. Then I’ll say, okay, I’ll stay in my lane for a pretty long while. ‘Cause you say, oh boy, is this lane…?

 

Excuse me, teacher, is this lane going anywhere? Please just stay in your lane. Then I would overthink. Here’s what would really happen…like, if that happened, I’d say, okay, I’ll try to stay in my lane for a while and just see how it goes. I can't promise to stay in my lane, but I will temporarily because this imaginary authority figure has kindly asked me to. How about this; you just stay in your lane for a little while? That might work with me, the kid me. Okay, I’ll do that. But then eventually I’d say, is this lane going any…? Just, how about…? You can't say it like that. You see how that went up? Then I would resist. No, no, no. Yeah, let’s just see where it goes. Let’s just stay in our lanes, okay? But eventually I would start to overthink it.

 

I’d say, this lane’s just going on…I don't know if I can stay in this…and then I would…once I was aware of the…then I would become so aware of the lane…this happens to me all the time even though it’s metaphorical. I think you probably get it. As soon as I’m aware of the lane, somehow I can't stay within it. Even…okay, I’m just gonna focus. They say…that’s…and that’s kind of…is how it is for us that can't sleep, either. The people that don’t experience that, they don’t have any way of processing it or even accepting it. ‘Cause I can just see that happening for real; they say, what do you mean you can't stay in your lane? Why…can't you just stay in your lane? Well, I’m…no, no, you…I’m trying. Well, the lane’s straight. You just gotta…no, no. No, I’m trying to stay in my lane, really, but I just can't. I don't know.

 

Well, just stay in your lane. It’s just that…what you do is there’s a lane and you stay in it. No, I know. I get that part, but I…and they would…sometimes they project all sorts of stuff onto you. Sometimes they let you know what they’re projecting. But you say, no, no, no, even if I was alone…you don’t understand; even if I was alone and I totally wanted to stay in this lane, it’s not like I’m…I’m not…I swear I’m not acting out. Just…I think we could agree on these things. There’s a lane you’re telling me to stay in, and I’m aware of the…I’m sensing the lane and my expectation is to stay in the lane. But something’s…I really…it’s like, even my subconscious wants me to stay in the lane, but my awareness of the existence of the lane…could I lay a metaphor on you about this metaphor?

 

I guess, or you could just stay in your lane. Well, here’s what happens when I go for…when they say, hey, let’s see how…I’m trying to think. Okay, let’s just say I’m getting a hug from someone who…it’s in a safe situation, a family member full of love. Then they hug me and I’m trying to hug them back. They say, can't you relax and just give me a real hug? I say…my honest response would be, not anymore. It’s not…I’m not…I can try to hug you, but it was already hard…there’s already…it’s not you. It’s not you, but it’s not quite me, either. I can try to hug you, but now that you’ve made me aware of the fact I have to relax while I’m hugging you probably is not…oh, when I get a massage, they say that; why don’t you just try to relax? I say, well, I’m never…I’ll never relax now. That would be the easiest version.

 

Oh, you just relax. I’m just gonna give you…I’m a professional masseuse you’ve paid…I mean, I haven't. Someone…it was a gift certificate. Sorry. I mean, no offense. Don't worry, I’ll still tip you and whatever, but…no, no. Okay, well, just try to relax and enjoy it. Yeah…well, is it the idea of…? No, no, it’s not…it’s beyond my understanding. It’s some sort of…it’s not spiritual, but now that you’ve…well, the thing is, once you’ve told me to relax, I can't…and so, do you understand now? That’s why I can't stay in my lane. Can you just stay in your lane? But that’s not…it’s just a lane that you stay in. Don’t you want to stay in your lane? Well, I’m actually trying…believe it or not — this is gonna be awkward — I’m trying to open up a sleep podcast and somehow you got in here.

 

I didn’t realize how deep my sub…I’m always surprised. Believe it or not, this is pretty funny…you’re not…probably not gonna laugh about this; you are somehow in a lane in my subconscious, though I’m very doubtful it’s a lane, but just to use your terminology…a bit like the Matrix or something. You do seem to have a lane that you stay in, because I’ve seen you in other places in my…deep within me, though not this particular terminology. So, we’ve actually…I don't know if you have a sense of deja vu, but we’ve gone through this before. So, I forgot even what your question was. You’ve probably experienced that before with me, but…yeah, so, I can't stay…I just can't stay in my lane.

 

I do desire it, or I do desire your praise and approval and a non-conflict, but my awareness that there’s a lane makes…I’m not being rebellious and I’m not…it’s much more…in this case, it’s mechanical. My…I mean, earlier, like twelve minutes ago when you told me about the lane, I was trying to not stay in my lane. That was rebellion. Now I…think about what it’s like to be me. Now I desire to stay in the lane and not rebel against it, and I can't stay in it. I think that about sums up bedtime, too. Holy cow, though, I’m trying to explain about Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. But those are pointless meanders and superfluous tangents, and this show does take a lot of getting used to. One, 'cause it’s a podcast that you just barely listen to. I think that part I’ve made apparent.

 

It’s different but you can just kinda…you say, oh boy, he does…he really…he’s really stuck in this…now I’m stuck in my lane. You’re right. It’s slightly relatable to some people, totally relatable to other people, or maybe you know someone like me. Maybe you can't relate, but you say, oh no, I know…I had you in my class. I’ve met a lot of people that said, I had a student just like you, and I wasn’t even a teacher. But they say, all…I’m the one person who gets e-mails from gurus like that. They said, this is coming from deep within a monastery. I sensed a disturbance in the Force, and then I listened to your podcast and I realized…but again, the show is meant to make you feel less alone and take your mind off of stuff, to be a friendly voice. But it does take some getting used to, one, 'cause you’re gonna be skeptical.

 

If you weren’t skeptical before, I mean, come on. You might be skeptical now, or maybe I’ve gone so far afield I’ve eased your skepticism. But even if I have, you came here looking for a podcast to put you to sleep, maybe 'cause someone recommended it or you searched for it, and you’re like, this is gonna put me to sleep? When is the…? Yeah, I’m here looking for something in the guru realm. Can't you stay in your lane and make a sleep podcast? I’d say, yeah, that’s how the show works. You’re exactly right, is that…I don't know. But yeah, so the…so, it just takes some getting used to, and I’m not saying that facetiously. I’ve gotten probably a million e-mails that have said, at first I had strong distaste for you, and then after two or three tries I realized, oh, this show never makes any sense.

 

He wasn’t kidding about that lane stuff. So, I don't know, just give it a few tries and see how it goes. The regular listeners are…I mean, they’re laughing 'cause I haven't found…this is kinda what happens in the intro; somehow I discover something strange within me. It’s like…it is…I have a mother lode of strangeness within me. I don't want to brag, but I had no idea this was in me. But then some person would be like, actually, on Episode 424, you actually…and I said, oh, wow. Well, it’s like a different…I found a different part of it, you know? So, that’s one thing. This is a podcast you just barely listen to. It also isn't here to put you to sleep. I’m here to keep you company while you fall asleep, which is a little bit different.

 

I’m here to be your bore-friend, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your bore-bestie, your neigh-bore, your Borbie, your bore-bor, your bores, your bore-friend, your best bore-friend forever, and keep you company while you fall asleep. So, there’s no pressure to fall asleep. That’s why the shows are over an hour. That’s why there’s over 600 episodes ready to go, so you don’t even have to think about falling asleep. You say, this person’s gonna ramble on and on and on about different stuff and keep me company, but I don't…I can just say, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, and barely pay attention, or nod with a half-smile on my face. So, yeah, that’s…I don't know what my point was. Oh yeah, it’s a podcast you barely listen to. No pressure to fall asleep.

 

I’m here to keep you company while you fall asleep, 'cause there are people listening who need a break during the day or listen to episode after episode after episode or who just can't sleep at all. So, I’m here to the very end whether you’re awake or asleep. The last thing is structure of the show. The structure of the show is very intentional and it’s the number-one thing that throws new people off, so I run through it every time. Again, this is the main way people listen to the show, this version of the podcast linearly, this ad-supported version. But if you listen to three or four of these and you say, ‘well, I like the show, but’ there’s ways to adjust. But I actually wouldn't adjust it ‘til you listened to…I don't know, you can adjust it whenever you want, I guess. But the show starts off with a greeting.

 

All our shows or 90% of our shows start off with a greeting so you feel seen and welcomed in; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and then whatever. Then I went off topic for longer than normal with our greeting. Then there’s support because that’s what…this is gonna sound strange if you’re new, but a ton of work goes into this show to make it sound free and easy, and a ton of time. So, the support is what makes that possible, to do this twice a week on a regular basis. If you prefer something without ads, you could support the show directly. But that…the sponsor version is what works for most people. It’s just what most people enjoy. Then there’s a long, meandering intro totally separate from the support. It’s a show within a show. Tonight it was definitely a show within a show.

 

It goes on and on and on for about fifteen to twenty-plus minutes, in this case, and it serves one purpose; to introduce the podcast to new people. For regular listeners, it follows a familiar structure every time, but it’s different every time so you can't quite adjust. You know how it’s gonna go, but you know it’s gonna have pointless meanders and superfluous tangents so whatever part of you keeps you awake like that Memory Lane part that says, well, now I got some memories for you, they’re still distracted. Because I just found that repetition…familiarity works, but when I hear something over and over again, it stops working for me. So, that’s why the intro is different every time. The reason the intro lasts fifteen or twenty minutes is because it’s part of most listeners’ wind down.

 

So, whether you’re getting ready for bed or you’re in bed getting comfortable…while there are some listeners that fall asleep during the intro, most people use this as part of their bedtime routine. So, the intro is supposed to ease you into bedtime. If you prefer something without the intro, we have Bedtime Stories From Sleep With Me. It’s in every podcast app, and that’s just the intro…or that’s just the greeting and the stories. But for most people, the intro…I mean, come on, this was pretty interesting. Then eventually…I don't know, just having a bedtime routine was what works for me personally, what most studies say works, or research, and it’s a nice thing 'cause it gives you something to look forward to.

 

So, that’s the intro, then there’s support, then it’ll be our bedtime story, Multiplex, tonight, and that’s it. That’s why I make the show. That’s what goes into it. I’m really glad you’re here and I’m really grateful for everybody that works on the show so hard and everybody that enables us to do that work. I’m really glad you’re here. I work really hard. So do all the other people that work on this show, 'cause we yearn and we strive. We really want to help you fall asleep. Thanks again for coming by, and if you believe in this show, here’s a couple ways you could support it for you and everybody else.

 

Alright everybody, welcome to our episodically modular series, Multiplex. Almost forgot the name of the series. This is a tale about four friends in a shopping mall working to help employee…people working at the mall and guests of the mall. The main character, Wyatt, is gonna catch you up on all the details. What episodically mod…this is a series. It is…it has a touch of seriality, and…but it’s episodically modular, meaning you could listen to them in any order. At the beginning of every episode, the main character does their best to catch you up on everything that’s happened. This particular episode, hopefully Wyatt will do a really detailed job of catching you up on everything that happened as a kind of throwback to stuff we used to do in the past, but we’ll see.

 

But yeah, so, this is Episode…oh, I’m not even sure if this is 14, 15, but you could listen to them in any order. Then the ones after it will be the rest of the series, and the ones before that will be prequel-type stuff. Or if you do want to listen to them order, that’s why we have over 600 shows ready to go. You could fall asleep right now or kinda just barely pay attention to this one, and then you could start…you can create a playlist tomorrow during the day with Episode 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. It’s all available if you listen to this free version of the show or if you listen to the paid version of the show. If you only want the stories, the stories are available in story-only podcasts on Sleep With Me+ or Bedtime Stories From Sleep With Me.

 

So…and that’s the beauty of why we make a podcast, is podcast apps…you can build playlists. So, if you did want to be a completist, just don’t pay…just barely pay attention. I can almost guarantee you won't remember much, but…or, yeah, you could…there’s also tons of other Sleep With Me episodes ready to go. But we keep that in mind. We keep you in mind when we make this from scratch, all the work that goes into the podcast. I try to put myself in different listeners’ shoes 'cause some people do like to listen to things in order, and I understand that. So, I built the show to kinda put you at ease, give you an option to barely pay attention or to listen to it and know you’re listening to the right episode. If this is your first Multiplex episode, this is number one. It’s just how they’re numbered.

 

But if you prefer to listen to them in numbered order, that’s fine, too. I got your needs in mind and…but for most people, you’re probably…you’re just kinda paying attention to me…you’re half paying attention to me. But if you are paying attention, I guess in the end, I want you to know I’m paying attention for you and to you and I see you, and that’s why we…'cause it used to be modular stuff was only for grades K through 6 — you say, oh, we have modules — or on stations in space; oh, that’s our module. It’s a habitation mod…well, this is the module where this takes place and this is where that takes place, but we can switch them around. So, yeah, that’s kinda the modular…episodically modular aspect of the show.

 

But you know what other aspect of all these episodes we have, is a Hollywood announcer who comes all the way from the Greater Los Angeles Area and who has so much of…he’s so gracious, so loving…he really is. I cannot say enough about…I think he’s in a…when stuff happens in the theme park, he doesn't…he shrugged. So, I’d like to go meet Puss in Boots in person, but I say, well, is that…? Or, I want to see the parade. I think you’re in a parade. He doesn't know, though. I mean, he knows; he’s just like…that’s how gracious he is. I guarantee…I’m gonna make eye contact with him, and now I’m gonna look away.

 

What he is…why he is deflecting isn't because…he’s comfortable…he’s so gracious, he’s comfortable taking compliments and praise and stuff like that, but he’s so gracious that he said, just in case…he will never tell me if at the theme park it’s his voice or not, because he wants to give graciousness to the…if it’s not his voice, he doesn't want to take away…that’s…so, he’s keeping in mind any other voice performers, including imaginary voice performers. He’s also keeping in mind my feelings. He wants me to go and have my own experience with Puss in Boots in a parade or a meet-and-greet or whatever and not be analyzing the voice and just…it’s not possible for me to be fully immersed, but…as a matter of fact, I’m more comfortable with…I mean, I’d say, that’s about close enough, Puss in Boots.

 

Is it Puss or Puss in Boots? If you…do you sign it with an N? Like, Puss N Boots? Puss in Boots is shrugging at me now. But he comes all the way here because he cares about you listeners and your sleep, and he loves just doing this. So, without further ado, our Hollywood announcer, Mr. Antonio Banderas. Scooter, you bumped the mic with your chin. The friends beyond the binary, the ladies, the gentlemen, the boys, the girls, it’s time to journey into the Multiplex. Chicka-chick-cha. Yeah, man. Oh boy, I liked that. Alright everybody, this is Multiplex, and take it away, Wyatt.

 

Hi, everybody. My name’s Wyatt, and good to be talking to you all here. I’m here to tell you a tale. I’ve been tell…I’ve been recording these audios to tell you a tale that’s…well, there’s a reason I’m tell…there’s two…well, there’s, yeah, two reasons I’m telling you this tale. It’s a tale of an adventure, but the style of tale, I believe, is untold. The adventure…you know, adventures get told all the time. I guess it really comes down to…a lot of adventurers, they say, oh boy, that’s the haros…well, if it was Haro, if that was the character, it’d be Haro’s journey, right? When they say that…or they could be talking about heroines or heroes, but their journey, right? The heroine’s…oh, wait, I may be saying it wrong. But lets just say there’s a haro, and it’s about their journey, and their journey brings them someplace great, right?

 

This is like…now, this is the wrong way to say it but I’m just using it in words that may create misunderstanding, but plain words. The plain person’s journey, I guess you’d say. You say, oh boy, a plain person? Just a person…just another person’s journey, maybe. Okay, maybe that’s better. I was gonna say the ordinary journey or the journey of an…how a person…but what did I say? That one I accidentally said worked. Just an ordinary person…just another ordinary person’s journey. But, no, no, no, just another person on a journey…no, that doesn't work either. On a journey to be an ordinary. Just another plain…just another…it’s not a plain adventure.

 

The adventure part is adventurey, but what happened was…that’s part of the reason I’m telling this tale, is because we…Boyd, the Corncob Kid, was an acquaintance, and Santos, San, and Josie were my friends. The three of us — no offense to Boyd — were on a path towards greatness. You could say, well, how do you know…? Well, I just know the path we were on. I didn’t know where it would lead. But if you were headed…if you were looking at the sun…let’s just say you were in a boat and you’re a child, maybe younger than me because we were in high school when this happened, or just out of high school. But you were in a boat and you say…okay, you see the sun going down slowly and you say, I’m gonna take this boat to the sun and I’m gonna row the boat that way. Let’s just say time slowed down or whatever.

 

You really think you’re gonna get there. That’s your destination, the sun, or the sun on the horizon or the horizon or wherever the sun sleeps, and you’re going there. Now, you may say there’s no way to get there. I’d say, well, maybe it wasn’t a great example, but you get the idea. We were headed towards greatness. That was where our compasses were set to. That was our true north in that…this metaphor, where the sun would have been…I don't know, is that your true west or just mostly west? But I guess we wouldn't have let the sun set until we had gotten to greatness, which each of us…it was a different flavor of greatness. It wasn’t just a greatness foisted on us by our parents or society, though those were contributing factors.

 

It was a greatness that stirred inside us, whether that…when the stirring began I can't say because it was…like I said, the vibration or the type of stirring was different in each one of us, where we were headed or where we thought we were headed or why we needed to get there. It was yearning before it was need or want. What I mean by that is…I say, what is this? But it’s driving me towards this goal. I realize there’s logical and emotional reasons why I want to get there, but there’s something else, too, that’s driving me towards the Halls of Ivy, in my case. That’s where I’m supposed to be, and not just in a…yeah, there’s some selfishness for it, but it’s also like, oh, this is where I could do the most good, have the most opportunity to do good, which is part of greatness, maybe.

 

To be a agent of change, all those things, and that’s where we were headed. Yeah, we had had…we had achieved and we were high achievers, and that doesn't take any way…anything away from other people. Like we said, Boyd was not on that path, though Boyd did achieve greatness, which is a bit of irony. But this is an adventure…how three people on separate paths towards separate goals in the same vicinity…? Or, I don't know. It wasn’t like we were delusional like we were gonna become Greek or…Greek gods and goddesses or anything like that, you know? But we could have been, I don't know, leaders or…I think I’m explaining it well enough.

 

Because what happened on this adventure was suddenly we went on an adventure so great that it deterred us from the path towards greatness, an adventure so grand, it didn’t…I don't know how to…you have to experience it, I guess. That’s why I’m telling the tale, because it doesn't make any sense even to me trying to metaphorize it, you know? It’s like…but how does a group of people — again, trying to use simple words to explain something — destined for greatness go on an adventure, an unbelievable adventure…and at the end of the adventure it leads them to a place that’s kind of plain and ordinary in the best way possible, but not in a way that takes away from other people’s greatness or other people’s plainness or ordinariness.

 

Or, you say, well, I’m a little bit shinier than ordinary. I would say, I see that. I like…that’s one of the things I like about you. I wouldn't have been able to say that or appreciate it, I guess. So, this is a great adventure of four people, where three of them ended up kinda plain and ordinary. I don't think that last part’s ever told. Or if it is, it’s not in a on-the-nose way. Hey, here’s this wild adventure we went on. Now we’re all kinda regular people with…I realize that those are just words. ‘Regular people’ doesn't define anything. So, that’s part of the reason I’m telling it. The other reason is to clear the record, because even though I had gone on an adventure, achieved a kind of life for myself in the middle, some of the things I did during my life…which, one was I recorded a public access TV show.

 

Which, to explain, is like…back when you had cable TV…let’s just say you lived in, I don't know, a town with a population of 350,000 in the Walnut Grove area. Greater Walnut Grove Metropolitan Area. That’s just a made-up city. Maybe you live in Walnut Grove; that’s great. Now, Walnut Grove would have their different channels. It’s a large enough market to have their own news and weather and stuff like that. But within all those channels, there would be a public access channel where the public could access it and make their own programming as a part of the community. So, I made a show on there, and…where I would host movies, autumnal-themed movies, science-fiction-themed movies, and I would have guests on. This is a popular form of public access. It was on even regular channels late at night sometimes.

 

It still is. I would host the movies, I would talk about them in-between or during breaks, and I would have guests on. Now, this was just public access, so only the people in the Walnut Grove area…a very small percentage of those people knew about public access, and even a smaller percentage watched public access, and even a smaller percentage of them watched my show. Every once in a while I’d be at the Pizza Hut and somebody’d say, oh yeah, you’re Wyatt, right? We’d have a nice interaction, but that was a rare thing. It was nice, nice to be appreciated, but…it was just a small thing 'cause we didn’t have…well, we had something like the internet, but we didn’t have streaming media and stuff like that. It was just something I did for fun.

 

I enjoyed it and the people…like I said, the person at the Pizza Hut enjoyed it, and that was good. But in this new era here, somehow someone uploaded all my tapes, digitized them and uploaded them. Which is fine because it…I understand the idea of preservation and the community colleges involved in that, and it’s probably good. The student was learning something. So, I’m not being judgmental. But something about the things gained a audience on the internet which is across the world, meaning there’s…even though it’s a niche thing, more people were interested in this niche thing. Particularly the interviews I did in-between movies, people were very interested in those because they said, how did he do that makeup, or…and who is this performer pretending to be the mummy? Who did the costuming?

 

This guy’s brilliant. Who is this improv troupe he works with? Who…how…? Was he doing all the writing himself? I’m here to clear the air finally. No, I was not. All of it’s real and a result of this adventure I went on. So, I’m not a makeup expert or a improv-er or a writer. I was just someone interested in those films and I had friends that I had met on this adventure who I could have on as guests. Which, it was cool. I mean, I guess, yeah, I said, oh boy, this will be cool, 'cause I knew no one would question it at the time. They’d have just thought, hey Boyd, who was that that was dressed up as the Count du Chocolate? I could say, they’re from out of town. That’s honestly what happened. Plugged into the circuit; that’s what…another thing I would say.

 

They would never question it because if you did watch, I still had the people on from the circuit, which was like, they were traveling from the conventions. They went from town to town and they would go on programs like mine to promote what they were doing, to promote the comic festival or the movie festival or their latest book or documentary or their movie that was coming out. So, none of it was my doing, I guess is what I’m saying. I said, well, why don’t I get this adventure down? It’ll clear the air but it’ll also let people know, sometimes you can go on an adventure to go back to a life without flash. So, I don't know. That’s why I’m here for, here to-fore to tell you. So, what happened in this adventure?

 

‘Cause we’re getting close to the end, so I better figure out telling you everything that’s happened so far, 'cause I don't even know if I remember it correctly. I’m not as young as the Wyatt in this story, for sure. So, what happened was…before I start telling this tale, I had a scholarship to go to the Halls of Ivy. So did my friends. We were all heavily looked…recruited, even. I also had some secrets I was keeping from everybody, which maybe I’ll…well, I could talk about it now. Well…well, yeah. So, I got admittance to the school I thought would be best, and I had gotten plenty of money to go there. What happened was I was…used to take things without permission from people and stores, and I would usually not use that stuff. I’d just throw it away or destroy it. It was something going on with me, obviously.

 

I had to be looked into and stuff eventually. But first I had to have something down happen, and…'cause I kept doing it even when I’d get caught. So, the consequences kept going up and, for a long time, was able to be kept a secret. My parents were more than willing to keep it a secret, too. It’s not the kind of thing you want to tell people, your son’s taking stuff and break…wait, so he took something from a store but not to use it but to break it and then throw it in the garbage? That’s strange. Yeah, I agree. I didn’t understand it at the time. It took some time and some healing, to be honest with you. But we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk…well, the consequences ended up being costly. I lost the scholarship.

 

The school was still willing to accept me contingent on me completing some things, but there was no longer any money for me to pay to go to school. We were in a conundrum because it wasn’t just that school, right? But this was the school, one of the schools to get into. So, going somewhere else…it was like, we’ve gotta figure out a way to pay for it. My parents were like, well, this is all we can do. But again, when you’re…I was a high achiever. I said, well, this is destiny. We’ll get it figured out. It wasn’t like I was unapologetic. I was caught in some sort of loop there, but cons…that loop aside, I still thought I could get to the Halls of Ivy through my own willpower and that I would figure it out. But I was down, too, because, one, I was holding a secret from all my friends.

 

Two, it was a secret I didn’t quite understand or couldn't comprehend. Nor could the adults in my life. Eventually I’d meet an adult that understood and could help me, but not that the adults didn’t want to. So, I was down about that. I was confused and down, but at the same time I still had a spark of like, I’m on this path towards greatness. I just gotta…I’m already…it wasn’t…it sounds egotistical and maybe a part of it is, but it was something more than that, right? It was that I knew I could figure it out if I set my mind to it, and I was about to set my mind to it when destiny rang at the door once again…because San and Josie and I were playing mini-golf. We were pretending we were playing it for the full amount of my scholarship or a million dollars or something. We were trying to beat my sister’s record.

 

We were trying to do that, right, and…sorry, I was just thinking about my sister and all that. It brings me to pause 'cause…maybe that was intertwined, and I’ve learned to pause. So, I’m here with you and…so, we were playing through that and I ended up not beating my sister’s record. So, I didn’t win the imaginary million. But out of this culvert that’s a part of…that was connected to the mini-golf course, Fairview Glen, in a little gully with a creek…the creek empties into a culvert, goes under this major road. Out of that culvert came Boyd, who went to our high school, the Corncob Kid. Boyd was carrying a bag with Julius J Juice concentrate. Julius J Juice used to be a popular place kinda like the pretzel places you see at the mall today.

 

There’s always a pretzel place, right, even at the outdoor malls, and there used to always be a Julius J Juice where you could get Julius J Juice. I think they sold other stuff too, but it was most famous for the Bubbler with Julius J Juice in it, which was some sort of…it’s mind-blowing. Though now there’s Dirty Soda, which is popular. But Julius J Juice was some sort of orange juice drink that tasted good and…but it was made from concentrate. Who would have known, right? ‘Cause they had fake oranges and stuff. They never said it was fresh orange juice. I’m not saying that. I guess the only thing I’m saying is people that like Julius J Juice liked it, right? But as things rise and fall, come and go, the store and the business that ran it closed, and also the mall. Oh, well, I guess I’m getting ahead of myself.

 

So, Boyd had this concentrate and Boyd said, yeah, it came from the mall, through that culvert. Now, the mall Boyd had come from had been closed for some time. It was a mall from when we were really young, but…since middle school had been closed, I think, or maybe sixth grade. I don't know, seventh grade? The mall had closed and I think even their…the ownership of the mall had gone away, and the company that ran Julius J Juice had gone away from existence, right? It had been liquidated already. That’s only important because Boyd said, yeah, I got this can of this Julius J Juice concentrate. I’m gonna sell it for a lot of money. We were impressed. That’s the kinda things teens do, you know, impress one another. ‘Cause Boyd was a associate of ours or like…but we weren't friends.

 

But Boyd was kind of a loner. We said, wow, that’s a lot of money for a can of concentrate. Then we…Boyd quickly alleviated us on the ethics because Boyd said, yeah, the store is full of this stuff. It’s concentrates in a sealed can. All the cans are intact and the mall and the store are…so, this is like forgotten merchandise. No one owns it. So, even if…it’s not even a gray area, though we’re not supposed to be in the mall. So, that would be the gray area. But if we can get it out of the mall, we’re out of the gray area and it’s not hard to accomplish 'cause the mall’s just closed. It’s not…there’s a fence around it, or two sets of fences, it turns out. I guess those fences were pretty intact 'cause no one had gotten in. Or, it wasn’t like people would sneak into the mall for fun.

 

So, Boyd said, but I got a way in through the culvert, and if we can bring it out, I can sell it on alt.julius…alt.treats.julius.juice or something. I don't know, something like the inter…what would become the internet. There’s a large number…there’s a large demand and a large number of cans of this stuff, Boyd said, cases of it. So, if we could get it out of the mall, Boyd could sell it, we could share the money…and it was a significant number of cans. So, even over time, it could help…it was…destiny was knocking at my door, right? My friend saw that and said, yeah, we’ll give you…we’ll let you keep the money. So, we headed in through the culvert and we kinda got separated 'cause my friends were like, why don’t you just…you two go and keep the cans? We’ll help you later.

 

But we don’t want to be sneaking around the mall, mess up our scholarships, you know. So, we agreed, but then my friends got sidetracked. We all ended up in the mall, basically, and we thought we’d get these cans and leave. But then things changed. There was something different about the mall once we were inside, and I don't just mean visually. I mean inside us, it felt different inside the mall. At first that was easy to just be like, well, we’re not supposed to be in here, right? Or, we’ve never been in a mall that’s been closed. ‘Cause it was clean. We start…we met a worker from the flatware store, and they said, we need your help. Somebody took something and I need to put it back in stock.

 

Eventually we found a person wrapped in…wrapped in stuff, the mommy, and then we were like, oh wait, maybe this is an immersive theater. That’s why the mall is so clean, lights are on, some of the stores are stocked, or most of the stores are stocked. This is a animatronic, right? They needed…kinda needed our assistance. At first we weren't sure, and they seemed…and then we ended up…I guess I’ll kinda…we ended up at the movie where the…the movie that the mommy was famous from. It became apparent that…'cause again, this is a common thing, these rooms that you gotta get out of. People pay to do this all the time in your world, and there’s ones that are also immersive theatre with performers. So, we still thought that. The mommy said, I gotta get into this movie but I need something to change, more or less.

 

Eventually we found that if we helped the mommy change their view of…instead of getting back in the movie to get back at the people who were not nice to the mommy, which would not end pleasantly for the mommy in the movie…if the mommy went in with a different outlook, things turned out better. That’s what we had to figure out slowly. Then the mommy, at the end of the movie, instead of not being a mommy anymore or…became a cereal commercial and a cereal mascot. I guess at that point 'cause it was nighttime and we slept, we said, something’s off here. This can't be immersive theatre. But we had the weekend covered 'cause we were gonna be up to teen stuff anyway. So, we could spend the weekend…we were like, I guess we’re spending the weekend in the mall.

 

Then after that, we helped…I can't really quite remember. We helped another worker because…at Spence’s, maybe, who needed light bulbs. Yeah. Then we found Franny from Franny and Victor, and Franny was trying to get back into their movie. I think they were trying to make some sort of thing. I just recorded this; my memory…but yeah, Franny needed help, and we needed to get the light bulbs back. At first we were like, we’re just gonna get this…we just want to leave at this point of the mall. Now, because it’s like…this isn't…something’s off here. So, we said, this is too confusing, I guess. But eventually we helped Franny get back in their movie the same way. Oh, if you don’t…you know what I’m…? I think you know what I’m saying.

 

If you go back in your movie and you’re…'cause they were like…no one wanted them to help them, so they were irritable, you know? So, we went back, we helped Franny, then Franny became a cereal mascot. Then we also met a cereal mascot, Crispy Commander, Commander Crunch, the Crispy Commander, who…like cereal time or breakfast time, cereal…spoons up. Reporting for breakfast, Crispy Commander, that whole…you remember all that. But it was a real being, a real, sentient being sleeping in a grandfather clock. The Crispy Commander said, yeah, great you’re here. Yeah, I need help. These beings are coming out of the movies and you gotta help them get back in the movies. I guess we didn’t quite…it was all very simple. It’s like, yeah, you gotta help them, otherwise they’ll start wandering around your town.

 

But if you help me, they’ll be in these cereal commercials. Actually, that’s a business, so you’ll get paid. I don't know, I think that was…we were like, oh wow. We were like, again, fate is calling. Then the Crispy Commander also said, by the way, time here is different. This is on the transverse plane. So, every day at the mall is only an hour in your world. So, suddenly it took away the time frame. It also gave us motivation, right? We can't let any…couldn’t have Franny walking around our town. Also, then I could go to the Halls of Ivy selfishly. So, we said, okay. Also, it was like, this is…not a hero from our youth, but someone we’re familiar with. Of course, we could…we thought at the time we could trust the Crispy Commander, even though it was a bit strange. Then at some point we helped the Count du Chocolate.

 

Same thing; they had the chocolate touch. You know about their movie, turning people and things to chocolate. We helped them learn how to be…to kinda solve some of those things. Again, a lot of this was based on things we could relate to, feelings deep inside, maybe the same feelings driving us to be great at the Halls of Ivy. At this time we didn’t detect that. This was a subtle influence, you know? But seeing the Count du Chocolate who really just wanted…they were stuck, right? They couldn't touch anything unless…or else it would turn to chocolate. No one likes that, obviously. Say, that was my best friend you just turned to chocolate, dude. Not cool. Well, I just want to be friends with all of you. That’s not gonna go well. No good result.

 

So, we helped the Count, we helped some other workers, then we met the person who couldn't be seen. We didn’t really want to help them because their movie…they were just…they had the biggest ego and they were not nice and they were a bit of a…I don't know, they weren’t a nihilist, but they were beyond that, you know? But we…eventually we ended up kinda helping them, but never back into their own movie. At this point we were just…they were helping us, 'cause suddenly we learned also that the Crispy Commander was a child and an adult? No. I don't know, they thought they were an adult. Maybe in the cereal realm they are an adult, because they were being…they had gone to retirement in the cereal realm.

 

This is what the Crispy Commander told us; they were gonna be retired, but they also fell in love with someone from a cereal commercial who was a grad student in the commercial right around the time the Crispy Commander was retired. Then they found out that…they didn’t know what acting was or anything like that, but they found out, oh, she’s an actress. Then they were like, well, I’m…it was a crush, by the way. They weren't actually…I mean, they thought they were in love and they thought now that they were…then they were in our world and they were like, well, if I could get her to come to the mall, I’ll make it a acting camp and then we’ll fall…we’re already in love. Again, very juvenile thinking, not even in a judgemental way. For us seniors in high school or graduated high school, we’re like, what? What?

 

But you could see how it’d be sensible to somebody younger. Then we realize, okay, we can't let this grad…this actress who plays graduate students in cereal commercials come to the mall thinking they’re coming to a professional immersive acting camp or however the Crispy Commander portrayed it. Oh, the person who couldn't be seen had been working for them, like upkeeping the mall and stuff like that. So, we had a new mission which was to double-cross the Crispy Commander and keep this girl…woman from coming to the mall, which…we succeeding on chasing her away by kinda making her…giving her non-positive feelings. The way I created the non-positive feelings with my friends was to tell them about how I took their stuff and damaged it and threw it away. So, then they were kinda mad at me.

 

I think I’m missing a couple other things in there. Maybe not, though. So, I guess let me recap before I take…let me summarize, 'cause maybe some stuff…so, there’s a Multiplex at our mall with more than one theatre. Oh, we had seen the projectors…there’s some sort of magical, transverse-plane thing happening. The way the transverse plane works, as far as we understood it, was it’s where multiple universes intersect. But things only cross over from one universe to another because they’re in need of something or they’re needed. I think that’s important, 'cause in the fancy portrayals of stuff, it’s always like on a…I don't know. I think that’s just interesting, and it makes sense for all this. So, like, why were there workers? Where were they from? I don't know, but they were in need of getting help.

 

Maybe they were from the mall world. I don't know. Maybe they were…it doesn't really matter why…so, when…so, basically there’s a world where these movies are…I don't understand it. Let’s just say that. But when the…when a movie would play, when the transverse plane was sitting on this mall or was intersecting, the main character from the movie would come out of the movie. Then they’d kinda be lost and they’d…they needed help getting back into their movie, which was their home. The problem was their movies never ended well for them even though they were the star or the movie was named after them. Count du Chocolate…it really wasn’t like…it never worked out in the end for the Count du Chocolate.

 

So, they were in need, right, at least by our definition, and by the Crispy Commander’s definition, the way to help them…or by helping them, they would then escape their world to go to the cereal world, I guess, maybe also be in our world as…in cereal and cereal commercials. Again, 'cause it’s not something you can understand, but it’s kinda like when you’re looking out the window and you’re looking into a mirror and the mirror’s reflecting something, or you’re looking out a window and there’s a mirror and then you see yourself. It’s you but it’s not you, right? Again, this is hard to explain. But so, it was real, right? The Crispy Commander was real. Crispy Commander had somehow got to the mall, I guess, 'cause they were in need, too.

 

But I guess at the time…at first I thought…I guess I didn’t understand this, but even now I say, were they needed? Because they were…we were acting kind of…we had suddenly joined up with the Crispy Commander and now were no…now we were in opposition of the Crispy Commander. Because once the Crispy Commander felt like we interrupted his love story or their love story, they were very unhappy about it. At first…also, my friends were very unhappy 'cause I basically said, hey, I took the thing that meant the most to you and ruined it, and I’m sorry. I mean, I did it so they would send their non-positive feelings to the actress so she would just leave the mall and never come back. That worked. So, now my friends weren’t happy with me, and the Crispy Commander wasn’t happy with any of us.

 

So, our initial…things weren’t going great, and then it was like, okay, why don’t you all leave the mall? I’ll stay here with the person who can't be seen. We’ll create a distraction. You leave, go tell the…at this point you’re gonna have to tell the adults 'cause this has kinda gotten outta hand, and then we’ll try to find a resolution, right? But we probably need adults. We agreed to that plan, but the Crispy Commander was already fuming, I guess. The Crispy Commander did something that hadn’t happened yet, which was to start a movie that was already…was from this year, which was called Chopping Town Mall.

 

It was a movie…a newer movie about safety bots that kept the mall safe in the fictional movie. But then they had a interaction with electromagnetic power or solar flares or something, and they had a malfunction where they would give you a non-positive experience for being in the mall, even if you were supposed to be there. Or they were both…usually supposed to give you a stern talking to and write you up. But instead, they would give you a non-positive experience, maybe even one that enables you to cross the rainbow bridge. But now those security bots were out of the movie and they…so, that interrupted that plan.

 

So, then we found ourselves in a store about being successful, and…Secret of My Success, and that’s where we were kinda able to at least work out some of our interpersonal stress from my bad behavior and kinda come up with a plan which was to…which we kinda had had in the back pocket, which was pretend the actress returned to the mall to distract the Crispy Commander again. So, I think that’s kinda like…we were like, okay, if we could pretend the actress has returned from the mall, then the Crispy Commander will stop the movie with the security bots, and hopefully that’ll stop them from chasing us around. But also, the person who couldn't be seen was still helping us.

 

So we said, okay, you could pretend…'cause they were…they had changed, really, where they wanted to help us, and they wanted to get back in their movie. They did not want to be a cereal commercial, though. So, I guess that’s kinda what’s happening, is like…now it’s like, what are we gonna do? We’re gonna have to figure out getting out of the mall, stopping all the movies, because…we have to stop the Crispy Commander, I guess, and help the person who can't be seen get back into their movie in some sort of order. Hopefully my friends can forgive me for making a mistake, you know? So, I guess that’s it. That’s how we got to where we are on this adventure of adventuring. I guess I filled you in for a whole time to talk.

 

So, the next time I talk to you, I’ll fill you in again briefly and then tell you how the tale goes from there, and then maybe take a break from telling the tale for a while because…yeah, there’s…this is the classic section, you know? So anyway, I appreciate you listening. I hope…give you hope for being plain if you need to, but not plain as defined by plain, but as ‘plain’ as in the Great Plains. So, goodnight, everybody.

 

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes)