Bedtime stories to help grown ups fall asleep in the deep, dark night.
Our schooldays with The Doctor as a professor come to a meandering conclusion where the inner light shines until it is a warm, dull glow, perfect for bedtime.
Episode 1075 – Family of Straw Based Beings | Sleeping with Doctor Who S3 E9
[START OF RECORDING]
INTRO: Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could thoughts on your mind, things you’re thinking about. I usually have thoughts about everything; internal, past, present, future, internal. You say, how many thoughts…you can…I can only think about one thing, myself, at once. But you say, you can only have one thought about one thing. That’s a theory, right? Or maybe it’s not a theory. Maybe it’s true.
But when you’re thinking about…when I’m thinking about myself, I can have a billion thoughts at the same time, maybe around that same subject. When I think about unicorns running through fields, I guess I can…that’s just the thought…I said, that’s a nice thought. So thoughts, feelings, anything coming up for you emotionally about those thoughts or something else, they could be leftover feelings or just, whatever, feelings that are there, important feelings, or they could be ones that are a little bit tuned down. Whatever they are, it could be also physical sensations, changes in your routine, your time, your temperature, mysteries. I’m still dealing with sleep mysteries right now. It could be something…I mean, you could be dealing with mysteries; that could cause sleeplessness.
One out of every two detectives or mystery-solvers probably could…may say yeah, it isn’t always getting to…you know, if it’s…the mysteries…I haven’t figured it out yet. The other ones would say well, I just sleep on…I say thanks, Sherlock Holmes. Not everybody…we’re not all…whatever. I gotta…I can’t…I don’t have such good…I don’t have as good boundaries as you, Thea…my…Thea Stilton is my…I say well, I don’t have those…kinda same ability to balance things like Thea Stilton does. I think one part of my brain said I don’t think Thea Stilton investigates mysteries. I say okay, fair enough. But yeah, whatever’s keeping you awake, I’d like to keep you company and take your mind off of that, which is a little bit different if you’re new. I’m so glad you’re here. I’m gonna tell you kinda everything you need to know.
I’m gonna try to create a safe place where you can set that stuff aside, and the safe place is kinda optional, or I could send it to you, or you could come check it out, or you could look across the way and say well, I’m looking at it. Sometimes people have paintings of warm cabins, right? An inviting cabin, and you just want to…maybe you just at a picture of the podcast. It would be imaginary, I guess, but you could look at the picture and you say huh, that’s not bad. That warm cabin looks inviting. If I was there, I don’t know if I would be…the door’s open…you know those pictures; the wood siding and warm light coming out of it, maybe a chimney with some smoke. All those things. You say well, that cabin looks pretty warm and inviting when I look at it in a picture across the room. I’m totally comfortable with it.
I’d say, you could use Sleep With Me like that if you wish. That is one of the multitude of safe places I’m going for, and the way I do it is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use these lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, which means that my voice is somewhat soothing but not traditionally soothing. It’s more forgettable in a un…you say, it’s unforgettably forgettable. Your voice is so unforgettable, I choose not to listen to it, or event…I barely listen to it. That’s the goal. I’m laughing ‘cause it’s true. I was trying to figure out…I just got a little smarmy there, is what it was. Then of course, I pictured Natalie Cole singing. But okay, so…send my voice across…lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet…pointless meanders and superfluous tangents.
You’ve witnessed those already, where I go off-topic, I get mixed up, I see something, I talk about it, then I try to get back to what I was talking about, then I make it about me, then I say wait a second, then I get fixated on a word or I mispronounce something. All that is part of the show, but when you’re new, it does take some getting used to. Or even if you returned to the show after a break, it takes some getting used to. ‘Cause even the idea of okay, so I’m supposed to listen to you but not listen to you…and I’d say, kinda, but that’s…that even to me sounds like a little bit of work. I say, you just barely…you just…just see how it goes. I’ll be talking; you don’t need to listen or even think about not listening, because I will try to engage you just enough to take your mind off of stuff.
But my ability to get to the point and make sense is not one of my strengths. That’s not…it’s just not. Even in…during the day, putting together thoughts in a clear and concise way, just not my forte. As I always say every tenth episode, my forte; Will Forte. I’m good at picturing Will Forte in my mind, so that’s my forte, putting…summarizing things in my brain? I could do it slowly in a way…painting an incomplete picture? Oh man, I got that down. If you need to be confounded, I’d have to look up the word to make sure we’re talking about the same thing. But if you’re looking for someone to confound you, you’re in the right place, or to keep you company.
So, what I’m gonna do, if you’re new…or let’s see…takes some getting used to…oh, this…yeah, ‘cause this is a podcast you just barely listen…it also doesn’t really put you to sleep. I’m here to keep you company while you drift off. So, what that means is you could just kinda barely listen to me. If you can’t sleep, I’ll be here to the end, because there are listeners that are just looking for company in the deep, dark night or a break during the day, but it also, I think, helps knowing I’m here. I’m gonna be telling you a story, or tonight we’ll be talking about a episode of Doctor Who in a very indirect and inane way where I’ll go…I’ll be more thinking like oh, what does that person remind me of? Or oh, that’s a Phish song or whatever it is.
So, to keep you company, but…so, you could…it’s like the kinda thing…you could listen or you could fall asleep at any time, and it does take some getting used to. Most people, it takes two or three listens to realize…’cause that’s not natural, right? In our day to day life, we’re expected to listen and pay attention. Then it’s like well, it’s not easy. That’s a lot of work. Or you’re listening for a distraction. You say well, boy, I can’t wait to listen to that podcast or watch that show or read that book. A lot of people are trying to get your attention. For me, it’s like, I’m just gonna have you look over here for a minute or two or a little while and say well, yeah, it’s like that cabin…you’ve seen that cabin picture, right? Maybe some of you have it in your home, but for most of us, you say I don’t know where that was.
Was it in a hotel or a place I delivered newspapers to or a waiting room? I’m not sure. That, ideally, is…after you get two or three tries, you say I’m not sure…at breakfast, it’ll be the same thing. You’ll say, what was Scoots talking about? You say, I don’t know. I think maybe waiting rooms? I don’t know, but I slept so good. I wasn’t even…I barely listened to any of it but I played it all night long. So, just see how it goes. The reason I make the podcast…I mean, I’ve been just having some sleep struggles, and so, I know how it feels, right, to wonder when I’m getting ready for bed. Even though I have a consistent bedtime routine, it’s like man, am I gonna get a good night’s sleep tonight? Am I gonna sleep through the night? I’m like a baby right now. I don’t have a baby, but I’m sleeping like a baby.
Anybody that has a baby knows that’s not a…it’s like sleeping like a baby when it’s asleep, but I’m not even sleeping like that. Anyway, so, that’s why I make the show, part of it, is I know how it feels. The more important part is you. You’re the most important part of this show because you deserve a good night’s sleep. If you can get the sleep you need, your life will be better. It’ll be more manageable if you start to get a bedtime routine going or find something that works for you. Your life will be better, our world will be a better place. So, even if you don’t like this show, after two or three tries, check out sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou. Or if you already don’t like the structure and the style of the show, it’s totally fine. Check out some other sleep podcasts on there.
But yeah, so…oh, so structure of the show; let’s go to that next. The show has a very specific structure just to…so it can…it’s adaptable, but the structure of the show is intentional. I guess that’s what I’m trying to say. It starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, then hopefully I say something funny, which I don’t necessarily ever succeed at, either. It’s like, it’s kinda funny. That way, you feel welcome, you feel seen, and you say oh, okay, this is a lighthearted podcast around a series subject. Then there’s support so the podcast can be free wherever you want to listen to it. So, that’s what the sponsors allow us to do and the people that pay for the free podcast allow us to do. So, anybody that needs it can listen whenever they want on any podcast app they want.
There’s also support for listeners, there’s support for the communities around the show, and so, that all happens then. Then there’s the intro, which we’re like, ten minutes into, probably. Sometimes when people feel strongly about the support stuff, they kinda…they think the intro is part of the support stuff. The intro is a show within a show where I attempt to explain what the podcast is, which normally people would be already done with ten minutes ago. But it’s a show within a show. It’s kind of…I try to explain what the structure is, how the show works, but I also go off-topic and stuff. So, some people…a small percentage of listeners fall asleep right away, or right as…way during the intro. Then another small percentage of people skip the intro and start the show at around twenty or thirty minutes.
But recently I’ve gotten some reviews that said hey, I used to do that; now I’m back listening to intros. Because the purpose of the intro, for…and again, you can…as you become a regular listener, you can kinda discover what works for you or you could support the show on Patreon and then you can kinda have a buffet of episodes, or…cut different ways; just intros or just stories or whatever. But so, the intro kinda hopefully is a buffer between your waking time and your sleeping time. It eases you into bedtime. Maybe it’s part of your wind-down routine or your getting-ready-for-bed routine because I found for me, that’s essential. I know one essential part that I…is cutting out the phone. You can start the podcast and then…in a podcast app. It’ll play with the screen off. But it’s like, for me, it’s like I gotta move my phone shutdown time to even earlier.
But having a wind-down time where I get ready for bed, I hang out with my dog, I start to just…it’s just a transition period. That really works. Everything about sleep…there’s a consensus at least around that. But it’s also important to me because again, it gives that same message to the parts of me that are overthinking or having strong feelings. It’s like hey, having a nice bedtime and wind-down works. I realize it could be inconvenient sometimes. This is me talking to myself. But it’s nice, and it’s nice to have a bedtime that’s relaxing and nice. Now, we can’t do that all the time, right? But that’s what the intro’s meant to do, is just give you some time to transition. Then there will be some support again for the show, free twice a week.
Then there will be our story, and that’ll be really snoozy. Tonight we’ll be covering a episode of Doctor Who, and then there’s thank-yous at the end of the show. I think that’s it. It’s definitely…give it a few tries.
Almost no one gets it on the first try, though people do message me and e-mail me that they did. But for the most part, it’s like something to try out, because you’ve…if you’re here, you’ve tried out a lot of different stuff, right, and none of it has worked consistently. Maybe even this doesn’t work consistently for you. I’m like, 80%; if I have a good bedtime routine…though whatever’s going on with me right now, it’s just not a…but it’s like okay, I’m going through a phase. But if I still have my bedtime routine…again, I’m making it about me, but it’s like…at least I still feel okay at bedtime. I hope the podcast can be a part of that for you or lead you to something different that could be a part of it for you, right? So, I’m glad you’re here. I really, really appreciate your time. I work really hard, I yearn and I strive, and I really hope I can help you fall asleep. Thank you again for coming by, and here’s a couple of ways I’m able to do this for you for free twice a week.
Alright everybody, it’s Scoots here. We’re talking about the second episode of this double family episode of Doctor Who. I don’t actually know the name of it ‘cause…just because I don’t. So, it’s loading here. We’re gonna continue…we’re not gonna continue watching ‘cause I guess it started on Episode 10 for me. But don’t worry, we’ll find it here somehow. Somehow, we’ll find it. The Doctor Who connection. There we go. A Family…A Related Family is the title of the episode, or just The Family. No one’s saying we are family in this episode, but yeah, I’m gonna hit Play, I’m gonna grab my notebook, and we’ll get going here. Okay, subtitles are on. Recap is running. This is Season 3 or Series 3, Episode 9.
David Tenant…real serious emotional arcs here, and ones that are not satisfactory for the characters, but have satisfaction for us as the audience, even though it builds more tension and very relatable. At least, I’ve been…if you’ve listened to other episodes of Sleep With Me, you know I’ve been in Martha’s position more than once. No offense; the Doctor can date whoever he wants, or Mr. Smith, whoever, Professor Smith. But come on, can’t you see the diamonds right in front of you, or whatever the say…I don’t know, is that a saying? It should be. So, I don’t know…and I’ve never seen this season or this series, so I don’t know how it’s gonna resolve. I mean, I do know…I do have…I do know how…it’s…that…how it’s gonna resolve.
I just don’t know how it reaches that resolution or any of the emotional arcs, ‘cause I did get spoiled on just one point of what happens. But it’s like, what…I don’t know. This is my own problems. So, Episode 9. Recap; human out of order. Different…fall in love. Kids, crows…this is not you. Change back…we need a Time Lord. Friend or lover? Open…so, yeah, they’re going for…there’s a kiss going on the screen. Martha’s…open the watch, Martha. Kid psychic…book…sonic screwdriver…straw friends. They found us. The Family taking presence in human bodies. Doctor in a cap. Change back…someone said I hate laser beams. Never done asking much, or whatever. The kid that plays the kid in the Family that was once a student is so good. I’m surprised we haven’t seen him in multiple roles.
He’s like a more sinister…he has the elements of Cillian Murphy and Crispin Glover put together. You know what I’m…? I mean, if you’ve seen this episode, you know exactly what I’m saying. Like a sinister Cillian Murphy. Okay, Jenny says what’s your decision, Mr. Smith? Kid psychic reaches into his pocket for the watch. Let me just pause it while I go through my notes. Back to shoulder…kid…kid psychic has plan. Heart breaks…Time Lord will engage, or something. Time Lord…watch open…Martha gets the drop. So, even after this, I say dude, did you just see Martha’s moves? The stuff Martha’s willing to put up with…with bad behavior, too, and…but also to draw boundaries and say that’s unacceptable, your behavior. Not in this scene, but later. So, showdown. Decider…mixed up…Doctor…showdown Doctor.
Mixed up…they get their litter laser beams drawn. Mouth suck…oh, mouth suck. Martha; such a bad A double-S. Oh, fully in love now. Is that me or is that…? Or fully…it looks like…my handwriting looks like some sort of letter that doesn’t exist, but I think it’s an F, then a U, then a L, and then a B. Then I-O, then L-I-N-I. But I think that’s L-O-V-E, and then now. I have my own shorthand, but it just changes every time I write something, so it doesn’t really do me any good. Screen’s running. Baines…Time Lord…heartbreak…kid opens the watch. Everybody…it’s a good distraction; allows Martha to make a move. She has Jenny. Martha’s so cool, staring him down, too. She says go for it, man. Like a Tarantino film; you want to do it? Probably…I think this is…what year was this made? 2007?
Martha says don’t even dream about it. Doctor Smith is frozen, or whatever, Mr. Smith. Then the nurse, she gets to leave with the Doctor. Go on…Martha’s doing the heroine move. She has to take command. She has to sacrifice multiple times in this episode. This one, she’s willing to save the day on her own. So, I think this is really good, and it’s good in the point of the season. I’m sure the arc plays out after this, of she’s the one that has to…oh, well I already said it, but she’s the one making things happen by necessity. But everyone’s gone except for Martha, the Family, and the straw friends. They’re all outside. Warn the village, tell the school. Kid psychic is not happy with the Doctor because he says what the heck? You’re supposed to help.
Now Martha’s trying to get out of the room slowly, but they’re rolling up on her, the four Family members. So much spirit. Much more fun. Where’s Jenny? I took over for Jenny. Yeah, they’re walking towards Martha. The straw friend grabs her, but Martha gets away…goes out the door. Everybody’s just standing around. She goes rubbish, come on, move. Why are you standing outside? Then they are all running. Kid psychic’s running in the woods with steam. They’re shooting lasers, everybody’s running. This is fun. Good to be out in the open. This is sport; this is what the aliens are saying. Schoolteacher went back to the school. What about Martha? Let me check Jenny’s memory. She was her friend. She used to go walking in the west, so that’s a clue for the team that’s not good. Husband of mine, go check it out.
Go to the west. Take some straw friends with you. Mother of mine, son of mine, let’s go check the school. So, then there’s more running towards the school with this theme of the point it is in England’s history. Also, it’s carrying a undertone and there’s a lot of hey, what choices are okay to make? Doctor’s ringing the bell. School’s gonna stand together. Martha’s like, what? We’re gonna stand up as the school with these kids. Enemy at the door. The bully comes down. Get ready, the Doctor’s saying. Everybody gets up; they’re already in their school outfits. The aliens are like okay, this could be a challenge. That’s why we needed the Time Lord, because we were weak in this human form. Maybe a little caution. We’ll send in the girl with the balloon to spy on them and give us info.
She smiles and skips off with her balloon, which somehow still has helium. Martha’s like Mr. Smith, what are you doing? These are boys. He says they’re cadets. Then the principal or something says what in thunder? This is gonna be a lot of punishments here. Then they say well, we got some wild stuff to explain to you. Principal’s headmaster, I guess. The school’s under…coming under straw friends and beings from another planet. Matron was with me. Baines, Mr. Clark, they’ve kinda lost it, I guess, is one way to put it. Matron, is that so? Yes, sir. Saw it with me own eyes. Okay, Mr. Smith, why do you think they’re coming here? Well, yeah, they said they’re coming here. That’s why they…that’s why we think so. They said they’re coming. Oh, very well, then. Let’s get on guard. Make some calls.
Mr. Philips and I will investigate. Martha says that’s not a good idea. The guy says I know everything. Excuse me. Martha says I’m…I gotta find the watch. Matron chases after her. The kid psychic is hiding and the watch is saying keep hiding; not yet. Time’s not right. Just be patient. Family’s aboard; watch out for them. So, then the headmaster and the vice principal or whatever go outside. Straw friends, Baines, and Jenny are out there. Is this a practical joke? Let’s just have some discipline. He says keep a civil tongue. Have you been drinking? Mr. Smith’s watching through the windows. Let’s calm down. Who are these friends of yours dressed up like straw-based beings? Made them myself. I’m ever-so good at science. Says, check it out; molecular fringe animation. Ever-so good. Baines, come inside. No, no thank you.
Send us John Smith and all will be well. The Time Lord consciousness…we need to find that, too, then we’ll leave you alone. Whose voice are you talking through, son? Family’s voice, dude. He said there’s trouble in the village with a capital T, and it rhymes with ‘bee’, and that stands for what our Family’s nickname is. He says you know what? History’s coming. History’s on its way. 1914…goes, you don’t even know. He goes, we’re looking for Mr. Smith. We’ve seen a lot. We know the future. Trouble is coming and W…the Ws. Mud…and you really want to think…why don’t you just back down? You don’t want to act like it’s glorious when it isn’t. The guy says yeah, I’ve been through a lot, man, so you don’t gotta bring it up with me. I realize the weight of my choices. King and country, though.
Then Baines says et cetera, et cetera, lasers the vice principal. Sorry I’m laughing; it’s just, the vice principal’s a little bit hapless. They say send out Mr. Smith. Hurry it up. Mr. Smith’s looking out the window. Principal’s running…closes the door. Baine gives a wet-lipped grin. Smith looks up like he wasn’t spying on them, which is interesting. I just noticed that for the first time. What’s going on with this, Mr. Smith? I have no idea. Telephones are down. This is it, just us. The headmaster says okay, let’s get it…let’s get busy. The kids look a lot younger now. They do; I don’t know how they did that. Just good acting. In the name of the king, let’s move. So, great direction. They close up the gates. Tell the guard to open up the gates; what’s that from? I don’t know.
Then the bully kid finds kid psychic hiding, says come on, you gotta help us. The girl’s spying. She sees him preparing. Baines sees it through her eyes. We’ll prepare. We’ve got the straw-based buddies. Send them in, soldiers, straw-based buddies, and they start marching. Let me see what the…let me go to my notes again. Kid psychic…[inaudible] Doctor, AV Martha, face-off, scarecrow, straw-based buddy. She runs…lots of running. Lasers…kid psychic runs. Martha goes west. Split up. Let’s go to school. School bell…lockdown…enemy at the door. We can get bumps…sand and sister…with balsamic and kid music. Send in sister with some sort of music. Kind? Oh, ‘cause she’s skipping. Martha; sad? What in thunder’s name? Principal is a jerk. Need the watch. Kid psychic talking to Doctor through the watch. Alcohol?
Bunnies…shun…shanor…oh, with authority figures? Send us Smith. We are the Family. Tin soldiers. Future warning for king and country. One teacher out. Run along. Ha, ha, ha. Stressed out Doctor…bully’s stressed. In the name of king…then the girl finds kid psychic, or bully finds kid psychic. Futuristic marching music. C-O-W-A-R-D. Red balloon…spy. Armor…armory…so do we, soldiers, soldiers. Marching music…prop…prep sequence, marching sequence. Lots of mist. Earlier…early, we in England…hold them back. It is a trick. Martha and matron…ahem…not from abroad. Who are you? Just a friend. Yeah, I hear you. Matron; ignorant. Oh, really? Can’t you see? Boys need me. Son of mine, father of mine. Found TARDIS. Doctor and Joan…river lean…more than facts. Dens and hideaways only a child knows.
Great line. Dens and hideaways only a child knows. Some romantic, lost prince or price. I think prince. Sad music…knows it is wrong. What choice? Kiss goodbye. Kid psychic tells bully the future. Watch runs…mother mad or Martha mad. Search…boy asks watch…because of her. Boy shows her the watch. Action; she runs. Flashbacks…they know. Time Lord…concert in hands of schoolboy. Go…maybe that’s something in the hands of a schoolboy. Find Ray’s watch…under…gods of straw. Finds…bring at doors. Stand by to Shelby. Fear…tears…straw friends out. Cease…just straw. Girl with balloon. Come with me; you’re funny. Bye. Doctor orders retreat, retreat. Panic…reanimate total straw-based chaos. Who has the watch? Kid uses watch. Retreat.
Old man calls Doctor, Doctor, they have the TARDIS. Come out. Blue box…I’m just a stray…cries…one more phase. They will come to us. This way, Martha. Follow me. Power up the ship…fix…targets. House in woods. Who lives here? No one. Out of breath. Tea is cold. Doctor is a little bit confused. I need the watch. Doctor is rude; yells at Martha. Why does he need you? Because he’s lonely. Knock at the door…straw friends don’t knock. Okay, we’ll come back. So, we got the straw friends marching here sequence, multiple fades, a lot of mist like I said. Get ready. Faster, everybody. They can’t see the marching straw-based buddies. Yeah, there’s a prep sequence of the kids getting ready. A lot of marching. I didn’t realize…maybe the same video.
There’s a plethora of straw-based buddies, so there’s probably a shortage of burlap in this area. They say this is it, a year early. The old W…what’s it good for? Lucy…hold back. Time Lord’s playing a trick. They say track down the Time Lord with your red balloon. Now, Martha’s saying jeez, yeah, he was an alien stored in the watch, his consciousness. It really looks like a watch. Alien; not from another nation, right? He was born on another world, Martha says. A different species. Yeah, yeah. Okay. In this fairy tale, the matron says, who are you? That’s where Martha’s heart starts to break. Friend…I mean, I’m not your rival as much as I…I’m just his friend. Human? Yeah, I’m human. Gonna be a Doctor, which the matron doesn’t believe is possible. Martha has to school her…like, you don’t get it.
She goes through all the bones of the hand; carpal, proximal, scaphoid, lunate, a lot more. Trapeze, trapoid, hamate, metacarpal, flanges, proximal middle distal…I’d say yeah, give her your middle distal for sure. Can’t you see this is the truth? The matron says I’m not ready to accept it. Martha says we just have to find the watch. You don’t have to accept anything. She says the boys need me. Martha frowns. The father calls; found the TARDIS. I got my green face going, so the Doctor can’t get away. So, that’s probably a bonus. Lies on the river lean…river Trent, the southern boundary. Stoked umber…encyclopedia; where’d you live? Broad Marsh Street, Hockley Terrace, Radford Place. More than facts. Where did you play as a child? Secret little places, dens, and hideaways only a child knows.
Man, that writing is magnificent. Tell me, how can you think I’m not real? I kissed you; was that a lie? No, it wasn’t, but this Doctor’s some romantic, lost prince? She’s trying to process it. Would you rather that? She kinda swallows. I’m not true enough? Am I not enough? She goes no, you’re enough. Anyway, I gotta go. She goes, these are boys, though. She goes, so I don’t think this is the John Smith I know anyway, sending these boys to deal with straw-based beings. It’s wrong. So, he’s in a conundrum. He says well, what choice do I have? Then he kisses her. She closes her eyes, opens…just a brief one. He storms off a little bit. She’s thoughtful. The boys are still getting ready for the straw-based beings.
Bully’s still bullying, even though the kid’s like dude, I’m gonna save your rear end in a year, so just so you know, you better change your tune. But he says I’ll do it anyway; it doesn’t matter how you act anyway. I’m a good kid. Maybe you’re…we all have our own deal with…deal, right? He said, this…the watch is here for me to help. Sorry, I gotta go, and…but the bully actually does a little bit of good acting at the end ‘cause he’s project…he’s projecting. Martha’s searching for the watch, runs off. Kid’s sitting with the watch. Girl finds him. He goes, what do I do, what do I do? Watch says watch out for her, but she’s already there, so it’s like, a little late. She caught me talking to the watch. She can sense something. She says, are you hiding something behind your back? He goes, what? Behind my back?
No, I saw you at the dance, so I was just thinking about dancing with you. Sure you’re not hiding something? No. She goes, show me. He goes oh, you’re not a little girl; you’re a being from another world. Do you think she’s strong enough to…look at this watch flash-forward, flash-back; angry Doctor. They say, there’s the Time Lord, in the hands of a schoolboy, concealed away. That was my handwriting; I couldn’t read. Now we gotta find the boy and his watch. What are we waiting for? Let’s do it. They roll in. More marching, more wild looks, banging on the door. This Doctor’s staring stuff down. This is like the showdown sequence. Not too exciting. Straw-based beings come in and they all go to sleep. Principal says okay, well, what did that do? Get ready again.
Then the girl appears and the principal’s like, you can’t be…they go yeah, that girl’s trouble. The principal gets laser-beamed by the little girl. She goes…the Doctor finally says let’s not face off with this alien. She’s an alien, not a girl, but probably not a good idea. Let’s go back to the school ‘cause you’re just kids. I’m the adult; I should deal with this. Baines says go on, get moving. He reanimates the…that’s when there’s straw-based chaos, ‘cause it reanimates the straw buddies. Everybody’s running everywhere and it’s a bit of a wild scene. Kid psychic is running, trying to find a place to hide or something. Doctor’s trying to hide the kids. Martha’s trying to hide them, get them out through the back door or something.
They’re searching the house, then they…they’re checking everybody’s pockets to see who’s got the watch. No, none of these kids got the watches. Then the kid does another distraction; opens the watch upstairs. I guess it’s a callback to the other episode, ‘cause maybe he sneaks out. The other boys go to hide and run. Doctor’s wide-eyed and he goes, you two go. I’ll deal with…I’ll save the rest of the boys, but it’s just straw-buddies anyway. The three of them run off into the woods. Kid psychic’s running. He got out the window, I think. Yep, the window’s open. They say to Baines, it’s like dude, you went in and out the window multiple times in this first episode. Then they somehow have transported the TARDIS to the school and they say Doctor, we got your TARDIS. Come and claim your prize.
But it actually causes a little crack because…then they’re able to discuss wait a second, this was in the comic books. So, don’t you recognize this? They say come on, come on out. This is…Doctor said, I’ve never seen that before. They go, you drew…draw it. Don’t you know the name of it? You wrote all about it, you drew pictures of it. Even the matron says it; a blue box, the blue box you dream of. He says no, no, no, I’m John Smith. I just want to be John Smith with his life and his job. So, this is where we get a little inner light, this part of it, through the rest of the episode, a little undertone like the great Next Generation episode. They say we need the Doctor, man. Martha’s forlorn. What am I then, nothing? I’m just a story? So, Mr. Smith’s upset. Martha’s…man, great…man, such emotion.
They say okay, one more phase. We gotta find the boy and his watch. The Doctor, Mr. Smith…and they’ll come to us ‘cause we got the TARDIS. But then they go off. Or maybe they say once we find the boy and his watch…so, they go to a house in the woods or in the countryside. Gotta keep going. Just listen to me, John. Let’s hide out. Doctor’s stiff. So, they…oh, ‘cause…oh, so they come up with a plan to get the Doctor out of hiding. They arm their ship and they use bigger lasers on the town, in the school. Let’s see, Smith goes into the ship. Oh, this is the end of the episode. The watch; hold it. No…wants to be held. Fire and ice, rage…lasers…Smith…love him to bits. Lots of relationship-talking Smith. That’s what’s coming up; Smith v Doctor.
Talk…every heart gets broken this episode except for the Doctor’s because his is not there. This is a little inner light…and Avengers Endgame or Avengers Endgame? Oh, the end of that movie with Captain America, yeah. His whole life, Smith keeps wasting time. Smith goes into the ship. Ship, say please. Still human. He goes, I gotta go to him. They’re lasering the town. Matron says you can’t. Martha, what should I do? We need the watch. Nothing we can do. Aren’t you the companion? What do you need to do? Why does he need you? Because he’s lonely…they use him because he’s lonely. That’s what you want me to become, a lonely hero? Then there’s a knock at the door. We talked about what if it’s them? I don’t think straw-based beings knock. It’s kid psychic; he just happens to have the watch.
Matron and Smith are holding hands at the table. He says I brought the watch here, but this is the whole hero’s choice, right? The watch told me to find you and have you hold it. Why didn’t you bring the watch? Kid says I’m a kid, man. The watch wanted to wait, then I…so I let it wait. Also, I was worried. Doctor’s intense, som…and he’s got strong feelings; fire and ice and rage. Night and the storm and the heart of the sun. Ancient and forever. Burns at the center of time, and you can see the turn of the universe. Doctor says cut it out, man. He’s wonderful. Martha smiles at that. Doctor’s breathing heavy. Matron looks down. She goes yeah, just like this journal. Those are just stories. Smith’s in denial. We know it’s true. Then we see the town getting lasered. What the double hockey stick?
A little bit like a game, commanding of lasers. The aliens are having fun. Villages getting ruined. Smith grabs the watch. Matron says don’t do it. Can’t you hear it? It’s like he’s asleep in there, waiting to waken. Low-level telepathic field, extra-synaptic engram. Then Martha says that’s what the Doctor says. Is that how he talks? Yeah, that’s him. All you have to do is open it and he’s back. Smith’s torn. Why’d you let me and Miss Redfern fall in love? I couldn’t stop you. You didn’t tell me you were gonna fall in love with somebody else. He goes, what sort of man is that? Now you expect me to just make this part of me go away? It was always gonna end, though. The Doctor said he’s got a family, and the family needs a Time Lord. So, something…I don’t know. So, he goes really, your job is just to sit and wait here?
Martha says come on, we need the Doctor. We need a hero. I’ve only just met him, but even that long ago, Martha says, he’s everything. He’s just everything to me. He doesn’t even look at me, but I don’t care ‘cause I love him to bits and I hope to god he doesn’t remember this. She goes, not as a friend, right? Heart to heart, heart to hearts. Should have thought of this before. I’ll just give them the watch and give up and then I can stay Mr. Smith. Martha says no. They want the Doctor. Then Nurse Redfern says you gotta be…I didn’t read it to the end. She goes, if you let them win, it’s all over for humanity and everything else. They’re not a family of good. Then the matron says leave me and Mr. Smith alone for a little bit. There’s some crying; he’s crying. He’s actually weeping. Wow. So, they embrace. Lasers are going on.
Martha and kid psychic sit in silence, breathing, stressed, side-by-side outside the house. Martha hugs the kid psychic. Doctor stares at the watch, or Smith does. Matron says I’d do it if I was you…if I could take your place, but I can’t. She said I had a lot of hopes for us, but my hopes aren’t important and the Doctor won’t love you. She goes, if he’s not you, then I don’t want him to love me anyway. She goes, I was in love once. Now I’m in love again, but I’m in love with you but I’m also…realize yeah, yeah…and it was real, doc…Smith says. She goes yeah, I really was in love with you and I thought we had a future. Then she holds the watch; says, blasted thing. Blasted thing. Can’t even hear it. It’s not talking to me. Then they clasp hands, then we get the inner light sequence fast. Marriage, kissing, birth, family starting.
Rock-a-bye baby, more kids in the countryside walking, swinging. Double-breasted suits, hand-holding like at the end of Avengers: Endgame. Time passing that way and saying okay, it’s all good, eh? They all send their love, John. He says okay, well, inner light, thanks for everything. Going to the…visit the big TARDIS in the center of the…and then the…she’s the only…saw it, though. She goes, the Time Lord has adventures, but none could…but he couldn’t have a life like that with me. The Doctor said…or Smith says but I can. Actually, there’s a painting with angels behind him. I can’t quite make it out. But she says, what are you gonna do? I like how they leave it. She stares at him, he stares at her. He’s unsure. Then we see the ship and they say okay, we’ll just keep…we’ll keep lasering the town…then we need to.
Then Smith stumbles in. Wow, there’s still fourteen minutes, it says, but I…so, I’ll have to see how this resolves. But let’s go through my notes here. Smith goes into the ship…stop; say please. He’s still human. I’m innocent. Gives them the watch. Hats…sweating, fake-out, glasses on…full game on. On the run. Red lights…get out. Ship out. They get up…go from grass…the fury of the Time Lord. He doles out some punishments. Girl in mirror…steam friend…something. Doctor…worlds off. Matron…to have will…tea set. Matron and Doctor awkward. She’s proud of Smith, who made the…was actually the hero choice. He makes her a companion offer. I say dude, come on, man. Don’t you have any real self…realization how this affects Martha? You and me could at least try…at least one with me. I can’t.
Martha’s…or somebody’s not happy with…through. Doctor’s choices on a whim…you can go. Stern look. She has the journal still. She cries. TARDIS in field in the rain. Moto bene. Doctor tries to play it off like nothing happened. He goes back into deflection mode. I’m familiar with that. Martha waiting; awkward. Timothy Tim shows up. I’ve seen the future. Take the watch. Hug…and ‘tis good. Yes. TARDIS out. Kid smiles and walks off in the rain. Back…then we see the kid save the bully…based on watch time. Back to precise…promised the Doctor a month over there. Watch close up…close up, end. Alright, let’s roll it. The Doctor’s on a ship; he accidentally falls and hits a bunch of buttons like a nincompoop, which they don’t pay attention to or they don’t realize it. They smell him.
Oh, he says shut down the guns and I’ll give you the watch. So, they say okay. He goes, I don’t understand what’s happening, but I’m innocent. He goes, I’m John Smith. I didn’t have any control over it. He didn’t just make himself human; he made himself a nincompoop. I think he falls again, same thing. But in a pretty good way, like out of nervousness. I don’t care about the Doctor and your family. I just want you to leave. So, I made my choice. You can have it. You could take the watch; just get it away from me. They say, jackpot. I really liked this turn, even though it kinda maybe…I mean, if it was the season end, we would have known, but…and they say you’re in trouble. Then they…he pushes the Doctor. He hits more buttons. They say, now we got the Time Lord. Open the watch…regular watch.
They try to breathe in the magic. It’s empty. They say, what? Doctor’s still…where’s it gone? You tell me. They throw the watch. He goes oh, boy. Well, you’ve been fooled. Olfactory misdirection. Ventriloquism of the nose. Elementary trick in certain parts of the galaxy. Gotta be said. He puts on his glasses. Looks like your engine’s overloaded. Probably not gonna be good. Oh, probably too late, actually. One thing you shouldn’t have done, press all those buttons…let me press those buttons, but I’ll give you some advice; better get off the ship right now, and the Doctor runs out. They realize oh, the ship’s gonna go bye-bye. Boom, boom. So, they all run. Ship goes bye-bye, and…running. Doctor’s got a lead on them. Yeah, no more ship, so then they look up and they say what in the…? That’s not good.
It was our only ship. We don’t have a backup or anything, which I say what if a tree fell on it or something? Then they say, that was the worst thing; he’s never yelled at us. The fury of the Time Lord is quiet. We discovered why. The Doctor had been through so much…why he’d run away from us. He ran away from us ‘cause he was kind. He didn’t want to have to punish us. So, he puts the father in unbreakable chains forged in the heart of a dwarf star. Mom sleeping in a event horizon for a while. Sister; she’s in a mirror. He can visit her once a year. She just chills in there. By the way, that’s…don’t worry about it. If you’re in a mirror, it’s just my sister chilling there. So, she’s stuck there. Nothing to have on your concern list. So, she’s just bored, and that’s always her.
Me, I’m suspended in…he has to become a straw-based being to watch over the fields of England as their protector, which is interesting ‘cause Cillian Murphy played the same character in one…the movies with the…one of the DC heroes. He played a straw-based being. Then we see a tea set. Nurse Redfern is sitting there, closing her eyes, stressed, clearly. Waiting…Doctor comes in. He’s got his duster on now. She stands, looks out the window. Everything taken care of? Yeah. Doctor’s smooth now. Yeah, parents are coming. School’s closed. There’s gonna be a lot of questions. Not even sure what to say. She looks at the Doctor. Oh, so, I didn’t want to look at you. You look the same as Smith. Better hair, but…sorry. This is really tough to look at you. Doctor; I must call you Doctor. She goes, where’s Smith, by the way?
John Smith. The Doctor says he’s part of me, just a story though. Could you change back? I could…roleplaying. Will you? No. Permanently, she means though. I guess he can’t roleplay; it’s 100% or nothing. Well, then. He was braver than you in the end. He was the one who had to…him and Martha were the ones…a ordinary man, an extraordinary woman chose. They chose, made the choices of sacrifice. You didn’t have to do anything. The Doctor said I’ll trump my bad behavior with even more bad behavior. Why don’t you come with me as my companion? Can’t handle the tension now. Well, I’m projecting. She goes, what do I look like to you, Doctor? I must seem so very small. Doctor goes, no. We could start over. I’d like it. You’re cool. You and me could try, at least.
He goes, if John Smith liked you, I’ll probably like you, too. I’m capable of that, he says. Not even that; I’m capable of that. She goes, no. He goes, come on. I can’t. Why not? She goes dude, I was in love with John Smith. You just happen to look like him. Then he walks towards her. He’s in here, inside. If you look at my eyes, answer me this question. Martha says if the Doctor had never visited us, never chosen this place on a whim, this…none of this would have happened, right? She’s mad now. I love it. She says, you have the culpability here, man. You just think you’re traipsing around the universe, but it has a impact on somebody else. He absorbs it. Then she says you can go. Great, great scene. Great, great, scene. Amazing. He tries to walk off. So, no wonder he plays the deflection card later. She’s tearing up.
But I never thought about that, how everybody…I don’t know if that’s all. I mean, the Doctor has to stay…well, I don’t know. She still has the journal. She hugs it close to her chest. She’s actually still wearing her wedding ring from her first marriage. So, a lot of layers. Then we see the field. It’s misty, rainy. Doctor’s walking in the rain, across the field. Martha’s standing there in a cool jacket. Her arms are crossed. Moto bene. Let’s get rolling. She’s like, is everything okay? Time to move on. She goes, I could go talk to her. Doctor goes, no. She goes so, about the things I said. I’d say anything to try to get you to change back. So, okay? Okay. Awkward; yeah. Let’s go on…move on. But Martha…wow, she looks beautiful so it’s like, what the heck, dude? He goes, thanks for looking after me. He gives her a friends hug.
Then the kid psychic shows up, Tim…Timothy Tim. Wanted to say goodbye. Thank you. Now I have…now I know I gotta save the bully later, so…it’s coming, huh? Say well, you can make your choices. He goes yeah, you’re making…your choice is to be a heroine, so maybe I can be a hero. He goes Tim, take this watch. With this watch, you’ll be…you’ll save the bully. He goes, just a watch now, but keep it with you for good luck. Martha gives him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. They try not to trip in the rain. They get in. He goes, you’ll like this bit, watching the TARDIS vanish, and we get to hear…it’s been a while since I’ve heard the TARDIS sound effects. So, it goes off. The kid smiles in disbelief. Rain gets stronger. Then he walks off and kinda…he’s like…with a look like that was cool, that was cool.
Then we see him help the bully a year later. Very impressive. The kinda history of the dominoes…I think the Doctor’s doing a voiceover, or maybe the kid is. I don’t know. But the kid still has the watch. One minute past the hour. I’m gonna keep my bully…Hutchinson is his name. So, he helps the bully and they look around. He laughs, says I did it. Looks around again; says thank you, Doctor. Then he goes come on, old chap. He goes, I’m gonna keep helping you. Didn’t I promise you that? It’s an order…receive my help. They go off together, climbing, climbing. Then…oh, then we see…oh, the kid in the future when his friend…his…oh, a memorial. Oh yeah, it’s like the…so, they say…so, the kid’s there holding the watch. Another flash-forward.
They’re talking about heroic acts and pinning…and we see Doctor and Martha looking on. He smiles. He sees them. He’s still holding the watch. It’s a solemn moment of memory and yeah, of memorial. A memorial moment, and saying let’s remember everybody. The kid touches the watch, and the episode ends. So, that was the episode, and then yeah, we’ll be back soon with another one. What do we got, two or three more? That was Episode 9. What do we got here? Let’s go to it and see. Yeah, so we got…oh, there’s a Christmas Special too, so maybe we’ll put that out at holiday time. But so, we got one, two, three, four. Cool. Looks like…I don’t know what to expect, but it should be good. So, I’m looking forward to it. Goodnight, everybody.
[END OF RECORDING]
(Transcribed by Leah Hervoly)
- “What in thunder?”
- Straw-Based Chaos (SBC)
- Olfactory Misdirection
- Thomas Kinkade
- Crispin Glover
- The Music Man
Notable Talking Points:
- You’ve seen that cabin picture, right?
- The kids look a lot younger now
- Smith and Martha are braver than Doctor
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Hi, you can call me Scooter.
Drew Ackerman is the creator and host of Sleep With Me, the one-of-a-kind bedtime story podcast featured in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Buzzfeed, Mental Floss, and Dr. Oz. Created in 2013, Sleep With Me combines the pain of insomnia with the relief of laughing and turns it into a unique storytelling podcast. Through Sleep With Me, Drew has dedicated himself to help those who feel alone in the deep dark night and just need someone to tell them a bedtime story.