1341 – We Need Moriarty | Get Besos in the Sky PI Ep 7

Episode 1341 – We Need Moriarty | Get Besos in the Sky PI Episode 7

 

[START OF RECORDING]

 

SCOOTER: Friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s time for the podcaster who wonders, what’s the quietest fabric in the world, really? Some fabric just answered me, but I didn’t hear what…it was called quietplex. It says, well, if you got ‘plex’ at the end, I’m not exactly sure…clothes that are whisper-quiet. I don't know, I guess clothes would say, what do you mean? I never said anything to you my whole life. Why you gotta be in our business right now? I’d say, well, how about this; I love it when clothes swish when I’m not recording a sleep podcast, and…clothes; you don’t need to be…clothes; do whatever you want. Seriously, forget everything I just said. I was just wondering, actually, so…clothes; don’t hold it against me. Anyway, welcome to Sleep With Me.

 

It’s a podcast that’s here to put you to sleep. That’s the only reason why we’d be talking about whisper-quiet clothes. Clothes would say, normally we're quieter than a whisper, by the way. Like, how many times do you hear us during the day? I’d say, okay, well, it sounds like…you're kinda being really loud right now when I’m trying to introduce a sleep podcast. So, the clothes’ commentary in my mind has strong opinions. So, that’s good. Clothes; you're well-represented within the many voices in my head. You've got a staunch defender of your rights to make noise or not make noise. But really, I’m a staunch defender of keeping you company and taking your mind off of stuff so you could fall asleep, so I’m glad you're here.

 

This show’s very different. I’m just here to be your friend in the deep, dark night to keep you company and take your mind off of stuff, and, yeah, that’s it. If you're new, welcome. If you haven't figured it out already, this podcast is a bit different. I’m really just here to be your friend in the deep, dark night and talk to you. So, I’m glad you're here. I work really hard. I yearn and I strive. I really hope I can help you fall asleep. We're able to come out on a regular basis thanks to the people that participate in all the stuff around the show. But it’s really an honor for me to keep you company, to be a part of this with you. I don't know. So, I’m really thankful. So…and, yeah, here’s a couple ways you could participate back with the show if you wish to. Thanks.

 

INTRO: [INTRO MUSIC] Hey, are you up all night tossing, turning, mind racing? Trouble getting to sleep? Trouble staying asleep? Well, welcome. This is Sleep With Me, the podcast that puts you to sleep. We do it with a bedtime story. Alls you need to do is get in bed, turn out the lights, and press Play. I’m gonna do the rest. What I’m going to attempt to do is create a safe place where you could set aside whatever’s keeping you awake. It could be thoughts on your mind that you're thinking about, thoughts about the past, the present, the future, things you're thinking about, things you were thinking about before you went to bed, things…thoughts that came up…thoughts, you know? Holy moly.

 

I mean, a lot of times I’m thinking I didn’t even real…the more I try to be present, the more…I don't know, is this a contradiction or a paradox or the other thing? The more I try to be present, the less…the more I realize I’m not present at all. I say, holy moly, mind…if this is what mindfulness is, I don't know if I want to know, you know? I’m not kidding, either. You say, holy cow. But really, it’s been great. Oh boy…oh, holy cow. No, really, mindfulness is great. It is. It causes me to laugh at so many things and be open to it. So, truly, it is. Thanks…there’s no way to get out of this with grace, huh? So, anyway, it could be thoughts, could be feelings coming up for you related to those thoughts or feelings that are just there, feelings also making an appearance. Like, ta-da; feelings. Yeah. Jazz hands.

 

Tonight while you try to go to sleep…tap-dancing feelings right on your bed. You say, wait a second, did you install a tap-dancing floor? It’s called a floor, not a tap-dancing…well, it’s a floor for tap-dancing. Dance floor? You could call it a dance floor. Okay, but did you install a dance floor in my bed right when I…? Well, no, no, it’s not a real…it’s only for dancing feelings. Yeah, we're gonna be doing four to five hours of different tap, tap-dance…interpretive dance. You've heard of it before, right? I’ve heard…I’ve never…I don't know if I’ve heard of interpretive tap dance. I mean, I…does that involve…has there ever been interpretive dance class that’s in…? Is it Morse code or Morris code? It’s Morse code. Right. I said that, right? I’m not trying to do a bit now. Is it Morris code or Morse code? Correct. It is.

 

Let’s just not get into…let’s agree to agree. Okay, so, you're gonna be tap-dancing Morse code in…for me to interpret? No, you don’t know Morse code, so we’ll be…we’ll just be tapping loudly. You'll be able to figure it out by the…well, is…will there be syncopated rhythms? Please don’t use vocabulary words you don’t know the meaning to about our tap-dancing. Well…but can you just answer yes or no? Either way, you would just…you wouldn't know if we were telling the truth. You just like saying syncopated rhythms. I do, I do. I wish I knew what syncopated rhythms were. I’ve heard…someone’s tried to explain to me syncopation, and then I…right. Well, don't worry, we have a dance about your listening skills and your…believe it or not, we have a interpretive dance about your lack of knowledge of syncopation.

 

Okay, but will that dance contain syncopation? Again, it won't matter. It’s about our feelings about…to create feelings in you about…okay, could we…is there any way…? I mean, I know…it sounds like you put a lot of work into this, but I’m trying to go to bed, and I don't know if I need an entire inter…first of all, it sounds like you're very inventive. I’m sure there’s been other performances of interpretive tap dance with or without Morris code. Morse code. With or without Morse code to get your point across. But is there a reason we do…? Oh, bedtime’s the only time you're paying attention. Okay, well, here’s a thing; maybe we…why don’t you…? Let’s just move that tap…my floor is way more comfortable without the tap…the dance floor on there.

 

What if you all get comfortable, you interpretive tap-dancers within me, and I tell you about this podcast I make? Because it’s kinda…sometimes there’s thoughts keeping me up. Sometimes it’s feelings, sometimes it’s tap-dancing feelings, sometimes it’s physical sensations, sometimes it’s changes in time, temperature, routine, sometimes you work…there might be a listener that works a different schedule, a different shift, has guests, is traveling, is in the middle of something. The reason I run through all that is to let everyone know but particularly the…particularly you, that you're not alone.

 

I know this is a podcast and I know all that stuff, but there’s something linking all of us that have trouble falling asleep, and it’s a general understanding of what it feels like and that we would all prefer most of the time…I guess if you're tap-dancing and expressing yourself, there must be some part of me that wants that. But most of the time I just want to be asleep, so I kinda get it. But you know what I mean? So, I don't know. Sometimes people are like, why do you gotta remind me of what’s keeping me awake? I say, the only reason I remind you is 'cause there’s other people out there that get it and feel for you and to let you know you're a part of something if you choose to. Now, if you're new, you may find this podcast doesn't help you out, and that’s okay, or that you don’t like it.

 

That’s okay, but that doesn't change the fact that people listening right now are rooting for you and that this podcast will help you out. Even if it doesn't, don't worry, I have recommendations…and that one day you become a regular listener and you say, oh, wow, I found this podcast; it doesn't make any sense. Pretty sure he was talking about interpretive tap-dancing and tap-dancing in Morris…I don't know if he knew if…how to…he definitely doesn’t know how to spell Morse or Morris, but he sounds like a confused guy, this podcaster, and…but relatable, and then I just fell asleep. I don't know. So, I hope the show can help you out. That’s why I make it. ‘Cause if you have trouble falling asleep, I’ve been there, and so have a lot of other people that are listening. But I’m here to take your mind off of it.

 

But first I gotta get you to come on in and rest or whatever, at least put your pinky in the door. You know what I’m…? The old…put the pinky in the doorway, not in the door, obviously. That may have been the worst metaphor to bring up on a sleep podcast, huh? But, okay, so, the other reason is 'cause you deserve a good night's sleep. You deserve a bedtime where you could get the rest you need so your life is more manageable, so you could be out there flourishing or at least not having to dread go to bed. I heard from another listener today who deals with that Sunday-night feeling and when…you know what I mean. I’m here to kinda try to ease some of that, to be like, well, at least I got that podcast to listen to. So, maybe it eases some of that in the deep, dark night.

 

What I do is I send my voice across the deep, dark night. I use lulling, soothing, creaky, dulcet tones, pointless meanders, and superfluous tangents, which means my voice is not traditionally soothing and I kinda go off topic, I get mixed up, I don't get to the point, but that’s all so you could barely listen to me. The show just isn't for everybody. Most people, almost everyone that gets here, is skeptical and doubtful at first because you probably tried a ton of other stuff to help you fall asleep, and you're probably frustrated, right, or you want to just get to sleep. I don't know, that…I’ve been there in that situation, too. Then you tune into the show and you're like, I thought this was a sleep podcast, and you're talking about tap-dancing in bed?

 

I’d say, yeah, I don't recommend it. In fact, I was trying to talk to those parts of my brain or body that were trying to tap-dance in my bed out of it. I mean, maybe a mattress on the floor…only…no, probably not a good…I mean, maybe if the whole floor was one mattress or the sub-floor was mattresses. Would that…? I don't know if…what that would do to the sound of the tapping, though, but we’ll leave that to professionals. What was my…? Oh, most people…oh, so, if you're skeptical or doubtful, I get it. You tuned in for a sleep podcast and…if…you don’t even need to trust me. If you could say, well, I’ll just give this show a couple tries…that’s what most people say; it takes a few tries to get used to this podcast because it’s very different.

 

On the second or third try, a lot of people are like, oh, he was totally serious about not making…he was totally serious about that…he takes it seriously even though it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. It’s always never going anywhere, always never getting started. He meant it when…and I believe that he does have internal tap-dancers that want to tap dance on his bed when he’s trying to sleep. It might not be tap-dancers for you. It might be something else. But if you already know you don’t like me or the show or there’s something about the show and you're like, I’ll never listen to that…the show again, that’s totally fine. I have a website set up for you, sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou.

 

Check other…there’s other sleep podcasts and sleepy stuff on there that you could check out, and maybe one of those will help you out. But if you're willing to, just give it a few tries and see how it goes, 'cause I’m here to be your friend in the deep, dark night, like a podcast you just barely listen to, kinda like background noise. I’m not here to put you to sleep. I’m here to keep you company while you fall asleep. There’s no pressure to fall asleep with this show.

 

That’s why it’s over an hour, is because I’m here to just keep you company, to be your bore-friend, your bore-sib, your bore-bud, your neigh-bore, your Borbie, your Borlaf, your boreman, your bores, your bore-bae, your bore-sib, your bore-bruh, your bore-cuz, your bore-bestie, best bore-friend f’eva, to just talk while you rest and drift off, 'cause there’s people who are listening who can't sleep at all or are in the middle of something and can't sleep. Maybe they're a regular listener; they woke up or they need a break during the day. That’s what ends up working about the show, is I’m here to keep you company whether you're awake or asleep.

 

I’m here to barely entertain you for over an hour so that you don’t need…I don't know, it’s kind of a weird thing, and I’m glad you're here to check it out and try it out and see how it goes for you. But if you've ever played something…background noise and not listened to it or you've had a friend talk to you and you haven't really listened to them and you said, this would be perfect for bedtime, this discussion about whatever, give it a few…see how it goes. So, it’s a podcast you barely listen to, it doesn't really put you to sleep, it keeps…what other good news…? Oh, most people don’t like it. Oh, structure of the show.

 

Let me run through the structure of the show just 'cause when some people get here, they don’t like the structure of the show, and I kinda want to meet you where you are just in case and then say, hey, if you want to adjust it down the road, you can. But there’s…the show’s structured in a particular way to benefit most people who listen, and…'cause most people who listen listen to this ad-supported version linearly. Some of those people listen with a sleep timer. So, the show starts off with a greeting; friends beyond the binary, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, then I try to say something silly so you say, huh, that person sounds friendly enough. I could check this show out. Then there’s sponsor support and stuff like that so you don’t have to pay for the podcast.

 

Then there’s a long, meandering intro that’s meant to ease you into bedtime versus put you to sleep. What do I mean by that? Well, the intro…like, the intro for most podcasts could take like thirty seconds to fifteen seconds to two minutes, I guess. ‘Cause you say, rub-a-dub-dub, this podcast is about bathtubs and things important to bathtubs. That’s…or bathing and…whatever, the Rub-A-Dub-Dub Cast. Is…? Point of order…oh, go ahead. Does there need to be…? It sounds like there’s a extra rub-a-dub-dub in there. No, it’s just the Rub-A-Dub-Dub Cast. You may have just heard a extra ‘dub’. Can I proceed? You may. So, what was my point? That would be the intro for the Rub-A-Dub…even that one I couldn't do efficiently. But there’s a purpose to it beyond me just not being good at getting to the point.

 

The intros are familiar structurally but every episode is different so that whatever’s keeping you awake doesn't quite know what’s coming next. I don't know, I think variety is what work…why other stuff didn’t work. Like, I want…I guess I want…and I put myself in the listeners’ shoes. I want something new and fresh, and…I don't know. The other thing the intro does is it doesn't…it’s not meant to put you to sleep. It does put some people to sleep, but for most people, they're getting ready for bed, they're winding down, they're in bed getting comfortable, or they're chilling out doing some chill activity, and that’s just what’s been shown to work, is to get eased into bedtime. So, the intro is meant to ease you into bedtime. There’s a lot of other options if you just want stories or you listen all night long or whatever.

 

This…reach out to me, 'cause there’s other ways you could listen to the podcast. But for most people, getting eased into bedtime through the intro…try it and see how it goes, I guess is all I could say. Then there will be support, then there will be our bedtime story. Tonight will be our episodically modular series, Get Besos Big Farm in the Sky. It’s got a pretty long title. But it’ll be cool. This episode, I’m looking forward to it. I haven't recorded it yet, but it…at least on paper, yeah, it looks interesting and looks like a lot…holy meanders. Speculative meanders are coming. So, yeah, that’s it. That’s why I make the show. That’s the thoughts we kinda put into the different parts of the show. So, I’m really glad you're here. We work really hard as a team. We yearn and we strive. We really want to help you fall asleep. So, thanks again for coming by, and here’s a couple ways we're able to do this for you regularly twice a week or more. Thanks.

 

Alright everybody, Scoots here. Welcome to our episodically modular series. Not Great…it’s called Get Besos Big Farm in the Sky PI, but Get Besos is the shorthand for it, or Get Besos PI…I guess Besos PI. That’s confusing. That’s perfect for a sleep podcast, I guess. Now, if you're new here, welcome. I’ll explain to you what episodically modular means and then what to expect coming up. Episodically modular means that you could listen to these episodes in any order. They do have recurring characters, somewhat of a touch of seriality, which offers…I mean, the reason we do a series with recurring characters is a little bit of familiarity helps with the lulling and the confusion. In this series, Get Besos PI, there’s…a lot of the characters are trying to help get Besos, to help him. Well, actually 'cause he has a list.

 

I’m pretty sure…the motivations of the characters are so sleepy. So, the show starts…Richard Warren, RW, and James, James Cash, who were once titans of retail…they both had stores named after them, retail empires, pre-shopping…into the shop…before the shopping malls, into the shopping malls. Now, obviously this was a long time ago. So, since then, they’ve moved on to other forms of existence, primarily a place of existence you may be familiar with or you may have heard of a version of it; the beige world, limbo, purgatory, Middle Earth…it’s not Middle Earth. That’s something totally different. Also, as a kid, I’ve sound this…I’ve said, so, is Middle Earth in the middle of Earth? No. Okay, but so, it’s in the middle of Earth, though, right? No. Well, how…? ‘Cause how do they have a sky if it’s Middle Earth? 

 

They said, it’s just a phrase. That means in the middle of Earth, right? It’s in the middle…so, if I go down to the middle of Earth, there’s also a horizon in there? They said, moving on. So…oh, what was I saying? So, they’ve moved on to a realm where they were living in a place…like a beige place. Not much to do. No highs, no lows, just a lot of sitting around. At some point, Richard Warren said, you know, there’s this guy I heard of, Jiff. He founded this company on Earth. It put both of our companies…made them irrelevant. Shopping malls…nearly…not in my opinion, but at least in their opinion, their stores…anchor tenants? Irrelevant.

 

This guy Richard Warren, he wasn’t too happy about it, so he said, I think I’m gonna head to Earth, sneak out of purgatory, and tell this Jiff what I think of him ruining our retail empires, our legacy, if you will. I’m gonna get him; I’m gonna talk to him. Now, there were seasons of that in the Sleep With Me history, and they had their ups and their downs. Turns out, the universe is very resilient. No matter what you do…'cause they had…they did a lot of stuff, post-earthly existence stuff. But on this time around, Jiff is wandering around in places, post-earthly realms, some with hockey sticks, helping…he has a list of people he’s supposed to help. Or, he’s supposed to help RW help eventually. Some of these people are mythological, some are fictional, but all are real, which I think maybe will be explained in this episode.

 

I hope so, hardy-har-har. But you could…don't worry, you could just barely pay attention. So, Jiff’s helping people. One person…actually, Jiff didn’t help them, but Javert from Les Mis…fictional in our world. For whatever reason, in the post-earthly realm, there’s a real Javert. Don’t ask me which one, though I’m pretty sure it’s the Russell Crowe…I mean, it can't be Russell Crowe, obviously, so maybe it’s not. But…and they said, hey, Javert, you don’t seem very happy in your post-earthly existence. Can we help you? How can I help? What a way to live. If only…if only this wasn’t a sleep podcast and I was telling you what RW’s really like, but you could read between the lines of the story. So, that’s about it.

 

Richard Warren, James Cash, and a PI known…well, known to Richard Warren just as a PI…the Big Farm in the Sky PI, though, known to Sleep With Me listeners…helping find Jiff and people in need of assistance. I think Daedalus got helped recently, too. So, yeah, I guess…yeah, that’s where we left off. Next up is our Hollywood announcer, Mr. Antonio Banderas. The ladies, the gentlemen, the boys and girls, it’s time to get Besos Big Farm…Besos PI. Yeah. Thank you, Antonio. We're always thinking of you and the Greater Los Angeles Area and…thank you…sorry, I was just doing…I was just…somehow you inhabited me there, but…oh, thank you, Scooter. Thank you for thinking of me. Yeah. I like that ‘yeah’ at the end. So, that’s Antonio Banderas. He’s our Hollywood announcer.

 

Usually I’ll have something snarky to say, but lately I would tell…I would say…I’ve told you lately that I love you, Antonio, and he would look at me and shrug his shoulders. He would probably say to me…he would probably say to me if he was speaking to me now with…he’s speaking to me without words. Then it would make me say…like the song More Than Words; not Have I Told You Lately That I Love You. But he would…I think he would say something like, I’d prefer it if you did it with actions and not words. Yeah. That’s my best Antonio Banderas imitation. It’s a pale imitation of an amazing man. Thanks, and here’s Get Besos Big Farm in the Sky PI.

 

Hey Diane, it’s me checking in. You know, when I’m recording this, Diane, it’s funny; you're…I don't know what to say, but DL’s…I don't know, Diane. Have you seen DL? Have you seen the creator of Agent Cooper? Just thinking of that, Diane. But better just get to the case at hand because, oh boy, Diane, I hope you're sitting down because I’m not in the greatest of spirits. I’m a bit…I’m here in Florida or Florida, as they say, and I’m at G and DK’s place. I just did some serious pacing, Diane, because Richard Warren…so, Richard Warren and James showed up at…they showed up in Florida. Apparently…well, they had nowhere to go, so they got ahold of me, James did. He said, also…well, anyway, I said, okay, well…they said, we got somebody here who needs to rest. He’s not ready to travel to realms.

 

I said, well, what do you want me to do? They said, don’t you know…? We know your main sources are in the real world, in Florida. So, do you think they could help us? I said, well, tell me more. It turns out they're traveling in some sort of magical, mechanical frog. They're with a cloud-based woman or a cloud that looks like a woman or a cloud-based…I guess it’s a god…a woman or a goddess, a cloud that’s…anyway, it’s too much to process, Diane, even for me. This isn't even what I’m trying to process. It’s RW as usual. So, we didn’t really have any options. G and DK say, okay, we’ll help this guy. He’s just gotta lie around. Nice to meet this cloud-based woman. Wow. I mean, they weren't too surprised because we’ve been on enough adventures before.

 

But really, the way this has worked in the past, Diane, is…I guess I’m a little jealous because it seems like Richard Warren, James Cash, and this cloud woman and this guy that’s sleeping are also from my realm, but they have full-Earth access, which I do not. So, I’d like to be there in person to hug G and DK, to see them with my…I mean, I guess it wouldn't be my own eyes, anyway, and to intervene on their behalf, to get Richard Warren outta there. James, too. But I’m also there…they're my clients and there’s a conflict of interest, Diane. I took on this case and I guess I’m not feeling the best about it. I just wanted to record some of this stuff 'cause I gotta remember I’m here to help. How can I be of service? Yes, I have my own feelings. I guess I’ve always assumed, just like everybody else on Earth…I think we’ve talked about this.

 

Yeah, I didn’t realize I would not leave my…your humanity…wherever you go, there you are, even after Earth. You just know a little bit more. Maybe your heart’s a little more generous. So, we're meeting. This cloud woman seems really nice from what I can hear and gather, and…I mean, I guess a part of me wants…I said, well, I’d like to meet a cloud-based…whatever. It’s some sort of…a goddess. Not that that’s the important part, Diane, but just…she also sounds very nice. But we're having a meeting, and I figured I’d just record it so that I…for my own use. This isn't…so, for the case. So, I’m gonna head in to the meeting, Diane, kinda like turning on Zoom, but different. RW’s…seems like…heading up the room. So, I’ll be back, Diane. Or, you'll be…I won't be…you'll hear…I won't say anything, probably.

 

Alright, alright, everybody, this is Richie here, and thank you all for gathering. I wish our PI could be here in person, but apparently not possible. I didn’t realize PIs were such rule-followers, but whatever. We have to work with what we have to work with. James and I are glad you're all here, and we got a lot of work to do. So, I’m just gonna turn it over to James. He’s the one who wants to talk to all of you, 'cause he’s got a lot on his mind. So, take it away, James. Richie, Richie, Richie…hey, everybody. Thanks, Richie. I didn’t realize that I would be the one speaking to all of you. So, hello. G, DK, I really appreciate you helping out. We're here in Florida unexpectedly, and Nafel and her ex-husband, right…she’s taking care of him. He needs to rest here.

 

Apparently we're gonna have to connect him with his son, but we're a little ahead of that. So, yeah. So, I wanted everybody to speak to you because there’s…I guess there’s something important I gotta talk to you about. But, you know, I’m never…I never come prepared because Richie’s kinda like…even though I guess I’m the one talking…I have a lot of concerns, so many concerns they’ve slipped my mind, Richie. Could you point me in the right direction to help me know what I’m concerned about, Rich? Richie, I’m sorry. Oh, James…again, everybody, I apologize on behalf of James. He does need a lot of guidance, this guy, and…but that’s what I’m here for. He does consider me his best friend. But James was saying that things aren't working. This just isn't working out. We haven't found Jiff.

 

We haven't got Jiff, and I don't even know what happened with the whole…that was a pretty good idea with the birdseed. Instead, I don't even know…I don't even need a report on my desk 'cause I don't have a desk…of…sounds like somebody was just running around playing games. But that’s beside the point of what James is saying. So, don’t narrow your eyes at me just because you're a PI or a friend of a PI. Don’t take it out on James. I’m just using the words in James’ head to explain to you that we don’t have Jiff and we don’t have the list. Okay, go ahead. Richie, I’m just saying…but we have helped some people, right? That’s what you were gonna say? Yeah, this is the Big Farm in the Sky PI here; yeah, we’ve been helping people that you…okay, okay, I get it, I get it. You've been helping people. Yeah, other people.

 

It sounds like you've been helping other people out. That’s great, except for…I mean, if…there are no checks here, but if I signed your checks, I would be the one…I would be signing on…huh, James would be signing on behalf of me. Well, the other thing is that if you read the reports I made, it seems like Jiff is helping even more people than we are, and it seems like Jiff’s in the middle of some giant project that…I mean, it seems to be aligned with your goal of getting people out…you see someone who’s in need in a situation you wouldn't want to be in, and you get them outta there. That seemed to be the model you were presenting, and it seems to be this…almost like multiple occasions happening, just finding a way to…is that what scaling is? Okay, okay, that’s not the point of our discussion here, PI.

 

Well, you know, I do have a name. Okay, but do we need…? I’m just speaking for James. You don’t need to…I think we're all in agreement that you may have a name, but I think we're all in agreement that this is the right thing to do and that we're on the…we need to change things up. Like you said, Jiff’s…maybe doing too much, and we need to get to Jiff and the list. But when you look at the staffing…is where James and I…we didn’t do it ourselves. I don't know if you're familiar with our retail empires. I mean, James’ was…mine was more of an empire. James’ was more of…larger than regional business, but…anyway, we’ve decided to up our staffing. It doesn't mean anyone’s gonna be…we’ve already got G and DK here…been helping you, PI. Simon’s the name. Okay, now I know your name is Simon. Ha, ha, ha.

 

It’s not funny. Okay, Simon. Here’s the thing; you are gonna continue to do the work you've been trying to do, but I think it’s time we brought in another person to help us, someone brilliant and someone that can…I’ve been thinking a lot about this and James has, too. James was trying to explain this to me the other day. What do you mean, Richie? Well, remember, you were talking about Sherlock Holmes. Well, yeah, I was saying that you don’t…you read the whole Sherlock Holmes book. You don’t just jump to the end. The PI’s…and people that are…it’s a process to do this. Okay, James. That may have been…yeah. James, you don’t have to soften…you could talk truth like you were talking to me. Well, that’s what I was saying, is you gotta read the whole book. No, no, James. Some people need to read the whole book.

 

But what we decided…this was a great idea that I got from work talking to James. He can't…he’s just talking about the book. I’m talking about this Moriarty, right, James? Okay, right. I was saying…well, that was when I was…that was when I got a little frustrated, Richie. Right, and that’s when I’m at my best, is when you're frustrated. Yeah, I guess that’s true, too. James and I came up with this idea of…we're gonna hire Moriarty to work with…'cause I said, okay, who else…? This Jiff, I can't think like him. My scope is too global. My heart’s too generous to think in the way…'cause you said super V-I-L-L-I-A-N to me, right, Richie? Right, James? Yeah, but I think I was saying it…I wasn’t saying hire a supervillain. No, yeah, because you didn’t realize it at the time that…I have to take…I have to find the good ideas. That’s my job.

 

Okay, this is Simon here; are you saying you're letting me, G, and DK go? ‘Cause that’s fine. That’s great if you're gonna cancel our contract. That would be just fine. No, no, no, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying we're gonna…in addition to your services, we're gonna find this…not just any Moriarty. James brought it up and then I said, oh yeah, the one…yeah, he was smarter than that know-it-all Picard. I loved him. They only had to not…Picard reminds me of Jiff, I guess, sometimes. So does Riker, Geordie, Data, Dr. Crusher, Troi. They all seem more like Jiff, limited…but that Moriarty…I said, holy moly. James, do you remember? We watched that. Yeah, Richie. That’s not Moriarty, though. Oh, James, it’s…that was Moriarty. That was the episode, Finding Moriarty. That wasn’t the name of the episode. Okay.

 

But anyway, let me just explain to everybody…so, Moriarty…oh, you might not know any…oh, G and DK, you know TNG? Okay. So, yeah, Moriarty was just doing his best with his friend, and they were just gonna try to be a part of the Enterprise 'cause they were already on there. It wasn’t their choice, either, by the way. Then Picard and the rest of them said, oh, no, no, no, too smart. Kinda…that’s kinda how…I try to work with Jiff just like this. So, anyway, I think we need Moriarty. So, someone that can figure out where…you know what I’m saying? This is Simon; I’m not…so, are you Moriarty or are you Picard? Oh, no, no, I’m kind of…no, I’m…Picard has…I’d be the super…I’d be the admiral. Okay. Is Jiff Moriarty or Picard? That’s a great question, Simon, and I would say a little bit like…he’s a little bit more like Barclay.

 

Okay, but Bar…so, you're saying…could you tell me what you're saying? We're bringing on…we're gonna find Moriarty and we're gonna get him over here, and then he’s gonna work with us. That’s simple math. Go ahead, DK. Okay, wait a second, so, DK’s question…okay, yeah, I forgot that I can't…the way it works in human…earthly and non-earthly relations. I guess it’s good 'cause I have to repeat everything you said. Usually your friend Simon does it, correct? Okay, James, could you explain to me what DK just said? Okay, Richie, so, great talking stuff. I’m glad you're using Simon’s name now. So, Moriarty…okay, so, TN…Star Trek: The Next Generation was a TV show, right, or a program, and…don’t want to get any more into that 'cause I know everything we’ve been through with other fictional characters.

 

So, Moriarty was a fictional character on a…like, a fictional character…was a…huh, how do I explain this? Well, just say what she said. So, Moriarty’s not…even on the show, Moriarty…well, Moriarty was real on the show, but the thing DK was saying is that Moriarty’s kind of in a version of paradise. So, Moriarty’s just fine, and if we're saying…yeah, what’s this thing about justification? I’m not…so, if we're justifying our actions by saying we're helping the people…he’s in a world, a limitless world, that he can explore with someone he loves. Right. Forever, James? Yeah, I guess forever. Okay. Go ahead, G. Oh, so G’s saying that maybe the world does have limits. Right, yeah, that’s what we're saying, is this is…forever and limitless are words that…come on. We know better. Okay, go ahead, G.

 

Okay, so, G’s saying, yeah, we…there…Moriarty may have tested the limits. It could have been…it felt limitless? Okay, well…and he can't get out, really. He didn’t have…he doesn't have a choice but to stay there. He could have simulated getting out just like on the episode, though, right? But there would be a limit to that? Oh, I guess so, yeah. Okay, DK, can he be trusted? Well, I mean, no, probably not, right? We don’t…oh, no, no, we don’t know, James. Let’s take one thing at a time. Okay, I’ll just…once Richie gets an idea, it’s…we're probably gonna do this. So, could we agree to work together, and Simon, please, can we all work together? We have the same goal, really, to help where we can. I mean, this is Simon; I’m working for you, so I don't really have a choice at this point. I think we need G and DK’s help.

 

I’ve already got them over-involved. Okay, go ahead, DK. Okay, so, DK is saying, so, Picard had to trap him because he was too powerful. Okay, G. Okay, so…okay, yeah, so, he basically is in some sort of drive or whatever, mini…self-contained computer universe. Okay, and that could be considered an afterlife. Okay. I mean, I guess so. So, what are you getting at? Oh, yeah. So, yeah, basically the theory…our working theory…James, there’s no theories here, just work. So, our work hasn’t covered the fact that we believe that if…within the earthly realm or maybe even outside the earthly realm, if you kinda…it’s not as simple as if you believe it, it’s true, but I think what we're saying here is in this case…so, with…Javert was the kind of first test we ran, and he’s…he was a real…so, he was real, yeah.

 

Whether it was that someone else believed he was real and having a post-earthly life or that it was us that made him real, he was real. So, at this point you're saying…so, if we're discussing this, like the drive was possibly an afterlife or led to an afterlife…like if the drive stopped working, or I guess…but then it would…huh. This is confusing. But if we were to believe that the drive was itself another life, I think we're okay. I guess I…I get what you two are trying to figure out. I would say, I don't know, but Richie’s gonna make sure we find out at this point. Oh, why would I go along…? Well, now that I’m thinking about it, once you start thinking about it, if it’s real, then you say, hm, maybe I do have to help this person out, even Moriarty, because we don’t know the situation.

 

But now that we're starting to think about the situation, being stuck on a drive probably…especially if the drive could break, that’s not the greatest thing, right? Okay, what’s the next…? Okay, so, we don’t know where Moriarty is, though. So, Richie, we don’t know where Moriarty is. James, he’s in the computer thing. Okay, yeah, but we don’t know where the computer thing is. Okay, what…G, DK, what do you mean? Okay…oh, yeah…okay, so, on the episode, it was on the Enterprise. Okay. Okay, so we could assume it was safe on…kept under safekeeping on the Enterprise. Okay. Okay, so that was the Enterprise D. Okay. Okay, so then…oh, wow, I didn’t know this.

 

This wasn’t in the…oh, this was years…okay, so then the Enterprise D made an unscheduled, unplanned, quick landing on Veridian III, non-functional landing. Okay. We don’t know after that…that’s where…so, after the episode, we have no idea where Moriarty is. Okay, so, what are…? So, what are our options? So, we have no idea…from the end of that…so, we don’t know what happened after the end of the episode, but you're saying we could make some safe assumptions up until Veridian III. Okay, so, do you understand, Richie? Okay, James. So, we could just…do we need a CD-ROM? What do you…? We’ll just dial it up. We’ll just dial his drive right up.

 

Okay. I think what G and DK are saying based on what we’ve experienced so far is that Mor…the drive and Mor…we can't be sure if the drive…Moriarty and the drive are one, almost. The afterlife is Moriarty…it’s like…it’s kinda like a metaphor, in a sense. A metaphor for incompetence is what it is, James. Okay, we just need to work on a plan. I have plans formulating in my mind, but we need…so, what you're saying is we need the drive. Right, but we don’t know…I don't know, this is a form of fiction we haven't got involved in, and then a form of existence that…we just want…I didn’t watch anymore…I’m not quite familiar with…so, James, we gotta find Moriarty and we gotta get Moriarty out of the drive. G, DK…James, why don’t you…Simon, why don’t you let me take over? G, DK, just…where’s the drive?

 

No, no, where do you believe the drive is? No, no, no, I…no, no, no. You're talking like that guy with the ears. This is not logical. Highly…I get it, highly illogical. Thank you, but I just need you to believe with near certainty where the drive is. Then we will go there and get Moriarty. Do you understand? What do you mean? No, no, so if you…let’s just say that the two of you agreed in your minds…but you could go in another room and talk about it, then separately come back and believe it, that the drive was just in…right around here. Oh, wait, this is regular Earth. But you know what I mean. Just imagine that you believe that it’s in Skiffy’s boat, our friend Skiffy’s boat, or in…in Simon’s pocket in the other realm. Then I…don’t you believe that? What are you laugh…? I don't understand what you're laughing about. Okay, Richie, I can explain.

 

Okay, James, explain to me how I can get these two to believe what I want them to believe. That’s…I don't know if that’s how belief works. So, it’s like, this is a afterlife in an afterlife, maybe, and maybe the drive’s not working. Oh, so now you want me to hire somebody…some computer guy, too. No. Okay, so here’s the thing; G and DK are trying to figure it out and be helpful and of service to us so we can find the drive. That’s our starting point, okay? So, we gotta back up a little. Right, but if they…James, can't you tell them what to believe, and then it’ll just be solved? Okay, they know enough about this…this is fictional history we're talking about, Richie, and…so, this is unprecedented for any realm.

 

Up until Javert, I didn’t even think about it until…we were just…we could have been…we could just be resting in the beige rooms. James, I mean, come on, we're here on Earth. You met a cloud-based woman who’s taking care of her husband in the next room, and you're gonna tell me you'd rather just be sitting around in a room with nothing to do? Well, I’m just getting concerned about the implications of what we're doing. We're gonna go get Moriarty. He’s gonna help us get Jiff. It’s not…there’s no implying. It’s a fact. Okay, so, here’s the thing; if we go back to just finding the drive, there’s no way to make G and DK…they can't say with 100% certainty where the drive…where a fictional drive might be, and I’m presuming we could go over to our side and then start to find these places, but they can't believe where it is.

 

There’s no way for them to believe it’s in a place where it can't be. Oh, well, I mean, I could…James, I wish I was in charge, because I could do that. Okay, so, we gotta base it on what they believe or think or what is actually possible. Or, it could be true within…Richie, I just don’t want to think about this stuff anymore. Right. It’s another reason we need Moriarty here, because Moriarty would have…I think…yeah, okay, well…I mean, the other thing that G and DK bring up is this is a unresolved thing, and while Moriarty’s drive is probably not best in your hands…what’s so funny, James? Well, like DK just said, it’s pretty interesting possibilities that haven't been covered, and there’s a new show about to come out about this.

 

So, we need to actually…unfortunately, we also have to get this resolved before it gets…before their beliefs change. Okay, so, walk me through what we need to do next, please. Okay, so, if…G and DK, you could just redirect me if you need to. Okay, so, G and DK don’t believe that…the device never appeared on any of the shows before or after that, so…okay, so, it’s safe to assume it wasn’t discovered by anybody on the shows. Okay, or that had any other intentions, right? Right, 'cause that could be the worst possible situation, either accidental uncovery or an intentional one. Okay, so, the drive could just be still at the site. Okay, yeah, give me everything you think where it is. Okay, there’s a pretty good chance it could still be running 'cause of the technology; okay.

 

Okay, but…and it probably wasn’t backed up because of the whole…because that would…okay, so, it probably wasn’t backed up. Okay, so after the episode, you think that it was still on Enterprise D in a safe location. Okay. Then the Enterprise…unscheduled land at Veridian III. Okay, then if Starfleet…which, we don’t know any of this, but this is one strong possibility, is that they ran a salvage operation and this was one thing they recovered. Okay, so, if they recovered the drive…okay, it would be at the Daystrom Institute or the Science Division, probably. Okay, that’s if they knew what it was, if it was properly marked or something. But it could have been just…oh, like in that scene in that movie; okay. Just in a vast storage area, just sitting there. Okay, it still could be at the site.

 

Okay, could have gone to another ship, but we don’t have any reason to believe that. Okay. Okay, so, it could have been transferred somewhere else to a third party or that division on the show. Okay, but you think that’s a low…so, someone else other than Starfleet having it; low possibility, 'cause we’d maybe know about it. Okay, there’s nothing to tell us that Picard or Data or anybody took it with them or gave it to anybody else. Okay, so…okay, you're gonna do research on this. Right now it’s looking like it could…it probably was recovered. Oh, and then in the Science Archives? Okay, or some kind of archives or at Daystrom or at the site. Okay. Okay, wait a second…okay, so…oh, wait a second…so, go ahead. Probably it wasn’t recovered, so now you're learn…okay, so there’s another planet nearby that’s inhabited.

 

This planet could be inhabited. Also, there could have been a warp core breach. Remember…was that a song, Warp Core Breach? Okay, so, there’s a large site of…that need to be salvaged, older technology that they may not have wanted to salvage. Also, there’s a lot of stuff going on, so they probably…their resources were spread thin. Okay, but mostly the Prime Directive. Oh, 'cause…so, they would have needed a big enough…so, there would have been…if there was anything on that Veridian III, they could have seen it, so that would violate the Prime Directive. If they were…someone could look from Veridian IV and see them. So, if you…okay, if G and DK were weighing the costs, they were…if you worked for Starfleet, you would say it’s not worth it 'cause you don’t know how much Starfleet knew about Moriarty.

 

But even if they did…okay, go ahead. You would put a time fuse on it because of when…if there was a warp core breach or whatever so then somebody wouldn't just accidentally find the drive if it was findable. Okay, so basically you're saying we need to go to Veridian III. Is that…? I don't even know if that’s possible, because we can't go to Veridian III here. It’s almost like we gotta get…we’d have to get into his drive ourselves and go to Veridian III inside the drive to rescue the drive inside the drive, because we have to go to the afterlife to…you know what I mean? No…Simon, what do you think? Okay, usually I talk to my assistant Diane about these things along with G and DK. Diane? I’m sorry, who’s Diane? Diane’s back in my home office. Okay.

 

What’s…she listening somehow? Yeah, I send her…she transcribes everything, all my notes for the cases. Okay, but she knows this is private. Yeah, she knows it’s private. It was all in the contract. Anyway, Diane…we're stumped, Diane, and usually when we're stumped, we could sit quietly or we could go get…buy ourself a piece of pie, buy ourself a present every day. That’s what Agent Cooper would have said if…but I’m no Agent Cooper, Diane. But I do know…I guess we’ve gotta find the drive, and I guess I kinda believe what you're saying, James. I don't know…I guess in some sense, too, the more you were talking, the more I was thinking and the more G and DK seem interested in this, that…yeah, this doesn't seem like a great idea.

 

If this thing’s sitting around somewhere, then maybe somebody could find it, and…this Moriarty does seem complicated. It does seem like they tried to give him a nice place to live forever, but then what G and DK are saying is there’s still gonna be limits to that. I think Mr. Richie, that your whole thing is that he didn’t say…he kind of agreed. I’ve never seen the episode, but what if he changed his…? He didn’t have a chance to change his mind. Isn't that your whole thing, is that you shouldn’t have to roll a boulder up a hill forever? So, I guess we should help him out and everyone else out, just like I’m trying…trying to work with someone that’s really hard to work with when…and they're grouchy and they make a lot…it sounds like…it must be what…Richie, it must be what it’s like for you working with me, right?

 

Oh boy, is it difficult. You're right about that. Yeah, because I always am asking so many questions. I’m oh, so moody, right, Diane? I got…I don't always make a lot of sense. So, it is hard for you to be my client. Oh, it is. Thank you for finally understanding that, Simon. I’m happy to use your name now that you understand how difficult you are to work with. I don't even know what my point was, Diane, other than just because Moriarty might be difficult to work with and we may have to come up with some strategies doesn't mean we shouldn't try to figure out how to help him. I’m just not sure I’m ready for the idea of…the other things we’ve done have occurred in a sensible place. We have to figure out where we need to go, like James said, to get to the place where we could get to this place.

 

So, I guess we're gonna have to think about it, and if we open that door, we can see the cloud-based woman’s singing gently. It’s…but we can't hear her because it’s a cloud-based song to the…to her ex-husband as he rests there. G and DK are kinda helping tidy up the room. So, I guess it’s a good a time as any to rest, and then we’ll head off to…I guess we’ll try to figure out how to head off to Veridian III and see what’s next. Oh, go ahead. I think we should split up, but, yeah, we’ll figure it out. So, I guess, yeah, we’ll figure it out soon, Diane. So, I’m gonna rest. Everybody else is gonna rest, and we’ll be back soon. Thanks, and goodnight, Diane.

 

[END OF RECORDING]

(Transcription performed by LeahTranscribes)

Get Besos in the Sky PI

 

Interpretive Dance

https://www.tdf.org/on-stage/tdf-stages/what-in-the-world-is-interpretive-dance/

https://prezi.com/yelde5bsmjld/the-history-of-interpretative-dance/

https://www.thecollector.com/isadora-duncan-facts/

 

Business Scaling

https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/how-to-scale-a-business

https://www.spendesk.com/blog/growth-vs-scaling/

https://www.score.org/resource/blog-post/how-scale-a-business

 

Moriarty

https://screenrant.com/sherlock-holmes-moriarty-actors-movies-shows/

https://kcrep.org/the-game-is-afoot-moriarty-in-sherlock-holmes-and-beyond/

http://the-consulting-detective.blogspot.com/2013/05/the-adventure-of-perfidious-plot-device.html

 

Moriarty TNG

https://screenrant.com/star-trek-professor-moriarty-explained/

https://www.startrek.com/news/warp-five-daniel-davis-star-trek-picard-james-moriarty

https://www.startrek.com/news/who-is-professor-james-moriarty

 

DOWN TO BUSINESS

What’s the quietest fabric in the world?

Fabrics, please don’t answer

Quiet-plex

Clothes that are whisper quiet

 

PLUGS

Sleep With Me Podcast; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Rusty Biscuit Links; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

 

SPONSORS

Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Acorns; Marley Spoon

 

INTRO

Things you thought about as you went to bed

The more I try to be present, the less I realize I’m not present at all

Mindfulness is great, of course

I can’t get out of this with grace, it seems

Tonight: Tap Dancing Feelings

Interpretive Tap Dance

Is it Morris Code or Morse Code?

Tap Dancing Morse Code

Please don’t use dance terms you don’t understand

Someone explained syncopation to me once

You’re not alone

A general understanding of what it feels like

Other people out there do get it

The old put the pinky in the doorway maneuver

Not in the door, definitely not the door

That classic Sunday night feeling

A subfloor of mattresses

Would that dampen the sound of tap dancing?

Always never getting started

It might not be tap dancers for you

It’s okay if you know this isn’t for you

No pressure to fall asleep

Your Borefriend, et al

Explaining the structure of the show

Rub a Dub Dub, welcome to the Bathcast

Speculative Meanders are Coming

 

STORY

Get Besos PI for short

Explaining episodically modular

RW and JC and their retail empires

Into the beige world

Middle earth, but not that Middle Earth

I never understood Middle Earth as a name, tbh

No highs, no lows, just sitting round

Jif made RW and JC irrelevant

RW wasn’t too happy about it and snuck into earth to talk to Jiff

The universe is very resilient

Jiff is wandering around post-earthly realms

He and RW are trying to help people

Hopefully it’s explained in this episode

Javert was first (don’t ask me which one)

And there’s a PI, too

Daedalus got helped recently

Antonio’s intro

We’re always thinking of you and the Greater Los Angeles Area

I have nothing snarky to say to him today

Antonio is speaking to me without words right now

I do a pale imitation of Antonio

PI checks in

Diane, have you seen DL or the creator of Agent Cooper?

I’m in Florida at G and DK’s place

Some Serious Pacing

RW and JC are in the real world now

Someone needs to rest and isn’t ready to travel realms yet

This person was on a magical mechanical frog with a cloud-based woman

It’s too much to process even for me

G and DK help the guy

They’re also from my realm and have full earth access (which I don’t)

How come I don’t have full Earth access?

I’d like to hug G and DK

I want to be of service

The cloud woman seems really nice

Okay, we’re all gonna have a meeting and I’m gonna record it

RW welcomes everyone

I didn’t realize PIs were such rule followers…

We’ve got a lot of work to do

JC takes over

I didn’t realize I would be speaking, ok…

In Florida, unexpectedly

Nefel’s ex-husband needs to rest

We need to connect him with his son

What am I concerned about again, Richie?

Things aren’t working

We haven’t got Jiff

And we don’t have the list

PI chimes in

We have been helping people, though

Richie wants them to help him, though

Jiff is helping people more than we are!

Is this scaling?

We need to change things up

Debating the size of a business empire

We’re going to up our staffing

Simon is the PI’s name

Let’s bring in someone else

Richie was explaining Sherlock Holmes to JC

Richie doesn’t have to read the whole book

RW is intrigued by Moriarty

RW is at his best when JC is frustrated

We’re gonna hire Moriarty

Super V-I-L-L-A-I-N

Are they letting Simon, G and DK go? No

Moriarty will be working in parallel

Smarter than that Know It All Picard

RW has severely misunderstood Moriarty

RW recaps a Moriarty TNG episode

We Need Moriarty

Wait, who’s Picard in this situation?

Long story short, we’re gonna hire Moriarty

DK has a question

Moriarty is 100% fictional

But I guess he was real on the show…

How do we justify this?

Maybe the world does have limits

Moriarty tested the limits of a limitless place

Plus, Moriarty cannot be trusted

Once RW gets an idea, we can’t stop him

Simon is just an employee, he doesn’t have a choice

Picard had to trap Moriarty because he was too powerful

Is being stuck in a simulated universe an afterlife?

No theories, just work

Javert was a test run for this

Does belief make a fictional character real?

Would he cease to exist if the data drive stops working?

Maybe we have to help everyone, even Moriarty

Being stuck on a drive isn’t that great, I guess

Where is the computer thing?

Assuming it was stored on the Enterprise D

The Enterprise made a quick non-functional landing on Veridian 3

And…we don’t know what happened after that

We can make some safe assumptions up to Veridian 3, I guess

Moriarty and the Drive are one, basically

RW is exacting in his demands

A new form of fiction (and existence)

RW just needs to know where the drive is

JC tries to mediate with RW

RW is being difficult

Talking fictional history

Concerned about implications

How can you know where a fictional drive would be?

Can it be a place where it can’t be?

RW is really fixated on Moriarty

G and DK check in

The device was never on TNG after that

So it must be somewhere on the ship

Maybe the drive is still at the site

Some really big Ifs

If Starfleet did some sort of recovery mission

The Science division

Maybe it’s in a vast storage area

Low possibility that someone else beside Starfleet has it

No evidence that the crew took it with them

Maybe in the Science Archives

Or at the site

It probably wasn’t recovered

Is that a song, “Warp Core Breach”?

Obeying the Prime Directive on Veridian 3

How do we even get to Veridian 3?

Go to Veridian 3 inside the drive?

Simon chimes in

RW has questions about Diane

When we’re stumped we buy ourselves a present every day

I guess we’re gonna go on this adventure

I guess we should give Moriarty a second chance

Oh So Moody

The Cloud-Based Woman is singing a cloud-based song

G and DK are tidying up

We’ll figure out how to get to Veridian 3

And split up next time

Goodnight

 

SUMMARY:

Episode: 1341

Title: We Need Moriarty | Get Besos in the Sky PI Ep 7

Plugs: Sleep With Me Podcast; SleepPhones; Story Only Feed; Rusty Biscuit Links; Emily Tat Artwork; Crisis Textline

Sponsors: Helix Sleep; Zocdoc; Progressive; Acorns; Marley Spoon

Notable Language:

• Whisper Quiet Clothes
• Quiet-plex
• Tap Dancing Feelings
• Interpretive Tap Dance
• Syncopation
• The old put the pinky in the doorway maneuver
• Rub a Dub Dub
• Speculative Meanders
• Middle Earth
• Some Serious Pacing
• Cloud-Based Goddess (CLG)
• Super V-I-L-L-A-I-N
• We Need Moriarty
• No theories, just work
• Non-functional Landing
• Oh So Moody

 

Notable Culture:

• • Morse Code
  • sleepwithmepodcast.com/nothankyou
  • The Rub A Dub Dub Cast
  • Sears
  • JCPenney

• The Lord of the Rings

• Les Miserables

• • Russell Crowe
  • Daedalus
  • Antonio Banderas
  • “More Than Words”
  • “Have I Told You Lately (That I Love You)”
  • David Lynch
  • Sherlock Holmes

• Star Trek: The Next Generation

• Raiders of the Lost Ark

• • “Warp Core Breach” song

• Twin Peaks

 

Notable Talking Points:

• Things you thought about as you went to bed
• The more I try to be present, the less I realize I’m not present at all
• Mindfulness is great, of course
• I can’t get out of this with grace, it seems
• Tonight: Tap Dancing Feelings
• Interpretive Tap Dance
• Is it Morris Code or Morse Code?
• Tap Dancing Morse Code
• Please don’t use dance terms you don’t understand
• Someone explained syncopation to me once
• You’re not alone
• A general understanding of what it feels like
• Other people out there do get it
• The old put the pinky in the doorway maneuver
• Not in the door, definitely not the door
• That classic Sunday night feeling
• A subfloor of mattresses
• Would that dampen the sound of tap dancing?
• Always never getting started
• It might not be tap dancers for you
• It’s okay if you know this isn’t for you
• No pressure to fall asleep
• Your Borefriend, et al
• Explaining the structure of the show
• Rub a Dub Dub, welcome to the Bathcast
• Speculative Meanders are Coming
• Get Besos PI for short
• Explaining episodically modular
• RW and JC and their retail empires
• Into the beige world
• Middle earth, but not that Middle Earth
• I never understood Middle Earth as a name, tbh
• No highs, no lows, just sitting round
• Jif made RW and JC irrelevant
• RW wasn’t too happy about it and snuck into earth to talk to Jiff
• The universe is very resilient
• Jiff is wandering around post-earthly realms
• He and RW are trying to help people
• Hopefully it’s explained in this episode
• Javert was first (don’t ask me which one)
• And there’s a PI, too
• Daedalus got helped recently
• Antonio’s intro
• We’re always thinking of you and the Greater Los Angeles Area
• I have nothing snarky to say to him today
• Antonio is speaking to me without words right now
• I do a pale imitation of Antonio
• PI checks in
• Diane, have you seen DL or the creator of Agent Cooper?
• I’m in Florida at G and DK’s place
• Some Serious Pacing
• RW and JC are in the real world now
• Someone needs to rest and isn’t ready to travel realms yet
• This person was on a magical mechanical frog with a cloud-based woman
• It’s too much to process even for me
• G and DK help the guy
• They’re also from my realm and have full earth access (which I don’t)
• How come I don’t have full Earth access?
• I’d like to hug G and DK
• I want to be of service
• The cloud woman seems really nice
• Okay, we’re all gonna have a meeting and I’m gonna record it
• RW welcomes everyone
• I didn’t realize PIs were such rule followers…
• We’ve got a lot of work to do
• JC takes over
• I didn’t realize I would be speaking, ok…
• In Florida, unexpectedly
• Nefel’s ex-husband needs to rest
• We need to connect him with his son
• What am I concerned about again, Richie?
• Things aren’t working
• We haven’t got Jiff
• And we don’t have the list
• PI chimes in
• We have been helping people, though
• Richie wants them to help him, though
• Jiff is helping people more than we are!
• Is this scaling?
• We need to change things up
• Debating the size of a business empire
• We’re going to up our staffing
• Simon is the PI’s name
• Let’s bring in someone else
• Richie was explaining Sherlock Holmes to JC
• Richie doesn’t have to read the whole book
• RW is intrigued by Moriarty
• RW is at his best when JC is frustrated
• We’re gonna hire Moriarty
• Super V-I-L-L-A-I-N
• Are they letting Simon, G and DK go? No
• Moriarty will be working in parallel
• Smarter than that Know It All Picard
• RW has severely misunderstood Moriarty
• RW recaps a Moriarty TNG episode
• We Need Moriarty
• Wait, who’s Picard in this situation?
• Long story short, we’re gonna hire Moriarty
• DK has a question
• Moriarty is 100% fictional
• But I guess he was real on the show…
• How do we justify this?
• Maybe the world does have limits
• Moriarty tested the limits of a limitless place
• Plus, Moriarty cannot be trusted
• Once RW gets an idea, we can’t stop him
• Simon is just an employee, he doesn’t have a choice
• Picard had to trap Moriarty because he was too powerful
• Is being stuck in a simulated universe an afterlife?
• No theories, just work
• Javert was a test run for this
• Does belief make a fictional character real?
• Would he cease to exist if the data drive stops working?
• Maybe we have to help everyone, even Moriarty
• Being stuck on a drive isn’t that great, I guess
• Where is the computer thing?
• Assuming it was stored on the Enterprise D
• The Enterprise made a quick non-functional landing on Veridian 3
• And…we don’t know what happened after that
• We can make some safe assumptions up to Veridian 3, I guess
• Moriarty and the Drive are one, basically
• RW is exacting in his demands
• A new form of fiction (and existence)
• RW just needs to know where the drive is
• JC tries to mediate with RW
• RW is being difficult
• Talking fictional history
• Concerned about implications
• How can you know where a fictional drive would be?
• Can it be a place where it can’t be?
• RW is really fixated on Moriarty
• G and DK check in
• The device was never on TNG after that
• So it must be somewhere on the ship
• Maybe the drive is still at the site
• Some really big Ifs
• If Starfleet did some sort of recovery mission
• The Science division
• Maybe it’s in a vast storage area
• Low possibility that someone else beside Starfleet has it
• No evidence that the crew took it with them
• Maybe in the Science Archives
• Or at the site
• It probably wasn’t recovered
• Is that a song, “Warp Core Breach”?
• Obeying the Prime Directive on Veridian 3
• How do we even get to Veridian 3?
• Go to Veridian 3 inside the drive?
• Simon chimes in
• RW has questions about Diane
• When we’re stumped we buy ourselves a present every day
• I guess we’re gonna go on this adventure
• I guess we should give Moriarty a second chance
• Oh So Moody
• The Cloud-Based Woman is singing a cloud-based song
• G and DK are tidying up
• We’ll figure out how to get to Veridian 3
• And split up next time
• Goodnight